How Tyumen residents can avoid going crazy this fall. Tips from NG72.ru / News of Tyumen and Tyumen region

In order not to break down, not to lose control of yourself and somehow establish a new life, you need practical advice. We asked psychologists, HR specialists and directors about what they do for the psychological comfort of employees. We found freelancers and remote workers who have been successfully working from home for several years.

It turned out that the following rules help them feel even better remotely than in the office:

Compliance with work schedule
Alternating time for rest and work
Physical activity or extreme
A complete weekend getaway
Activity plan for children
Office rental
Organization of work space
Setting up workflows
Attention to appearance
Information flow management
Desire for completed actions
Checklist: how to maintain mental stability remotely

Follow your work schedule

The main problem of those who switch to remote work is time management. We often put things off, stretching out any task throughout the day. As a result, we sit at the computer for 12 hours, distracted by social networks and news, and then frantically finish our work at night.

Workaholics are discovering that they can get more done remotely. They use the time that was previously spent on the road for the benefit of their work. Then they have lunch at the computer. They don’t see a problem in working in the evenings or on weekends. As a result, their working day goes far beyond the standard 8 hours. But the body can’t stand it, and burnout begins.

The solution to this problem is to create a schedule and stick to it. If you are freelancing, then decide what hours will be working. If this is a regular job, just remote, then discuss your schedule with your manager. Agree when you will be in touch. The rest of the time, turn off your phone and prohibit yourself from going near the computer.

Editor-in-Chief of the Mail.ru Cloud Solutions blog Ekaterina Kushnir has been working remotely since 2010. Therefore, she is very familiar with the problem of mixing personal and work time.

As a result, she found a solution - to set a regime, the number of hours beyond which one cannot work. “Usually this is a standard office schedule - from 9.00 to 17.00 with a lunch break to be in touch with colleagues,” says Kushnir. — Sometimes I can work early in the morning or late in the evening, but not during the day. I also always have two days off a week, although it’s not always Saturday and Sunday.”

Alternate time for rest and work

Don't demand maximum concentration from yourself throughout the entire working day. “Working responsibly 8 hours a day is difficult,” says Kirill Grishanin, founder of WB-Tech. “The efficiency of a normal person is 70%, the remaining 30% of the time is spent on personal matters or surfing the Internet.”

Yana Frank, in her book on time management, “The Muse and the Beast: How to Organize Creative Work,” recommends dividing your working time into segments—we work for 40-45 minutes, rest for 15 minutes.

But you also need to rest properly. If the work involves intellectual stress, then you should not switch to something complex. It is better to do physical exercise or household chores, for example, wash the dishes.

This is also a great way to force yourself to get down to work when you really don’t want to. The well-known technique for combating procrastination, the Pomodoro method, works in much the same way. You promise yourself to work for only 25 minutes, then rest for 5 minutes. It’s easier to start this way, because 25 minutes is very little. After four repetitions, stretch the rest for 15-20 minutes.

Pharmedu CEO Tatyana Khodanovich recommends finding time for yourself - these 10-15 minutes every few hours help you not go crazy while in a confined space. “You can even just look out the window for 5-7 minutes, this is a kind of meditation. Or go to the store, during self-isolation this is also a kind of relaxation.”

How Tyumen residents can avoid going crazy this fall. Tips from NG72.ru

Autumn is a time of blues, sadness, depression, gray photos on social networks and approaching cold weather. NG72.RU has prepared several ways for readers to avoid going crazy this fall.

Experts recommend that in order to cope with the autumn blues you need to eat right, walk, get enough sleep, communicate with friends, discover something new and don’t forget to pamper yourself. We asked city residents how they cope with the blues and whether they notice that their mood worsens in the fall.

Igor, 28 years old. Entrepreneur

— Autumn is cold, as is the general mood. The only things that keep me warm are my beloved dogs and chatting with friends in the evenings after work. Everyone needs to stick together because it's about to get even colder.

Take a walk through the beautiful places of Tyumen
At any time of the day, residents of the city can enjoy beautiful views from the Lovers' Bridge to the Tyumen embankment. Especially now that the bridge has been renovated and turned into a ship with a real steering wheel. Here you can take photos, drink coffee and look at the old part of the city, which opens up in full view.

In the city center you can walk along Tekutyevsky or Tsvetnoy boulevards. Visit Siberian cats in the park or just sit on a bench in one of the city parks.

Ekaterina, 23 years old. Photographer

— For me, autumn is as wonderful a time of year as summer, winter and spring. Of course, the mood changes, but it does not reach a state of depression. This is the time when you want to slow down the pace of life, analyze the work done and make plans for the future. I am glad that I have a lot of time for creativity, for leisurely walks and cozy evenings with my loved one.

Go to a free photo session

Many shopping centers in the city have unusually designed stands for professional photo shoots. Anyone can take a souvenir photo for free. If you are not used to taking pictures with strangers or you just want to be alone with your thoughts, then you can take a couple of memorable pictures in the parks of Tyumen.

For example, you can come to Zatyumensky Park and Gilevskaya Grove and be alone. The large space of the forest park will hide you from prying eyes; you can not only take a photo, but also relax, collect your thoughts and listen to the nightingale singing or the crunch of leaves under your feet.

Ekaterina, 23 years old. Journalist

— In September, the active business season begins, there is a lot of work, constant travel and business trips, so there is no time to fall into autumn depression. And in the rainiest and dreary weather, hot delicious tea, a good movie and a warm down jacket can save you.

Stay at home in front of the TV and drink tea

Perhaps this is one of the acceptable options for those who do not want to leave the house at all in the cold autumn. Now is the time for you to watch old comedies to laugh heartily and forget about all your pressing problems.

Do you remember how you made a selection of films that you dreamed of watching? It's time to plunge into the world of cinema without stopping. Stock up on tea and snacks, and a good mood will come while watching. You will not notice how the spoiled mood will pass.

Ekaterina, 22 years old. Designer

— I don’t really like autumn because of the dirt and slush, but it doesn’t spoil my mood. I spend my free time from work with friends and family, we go to the movies, we walk in the evenings in warm weather, if it’s raining outside, we sit at home and watch movies!

Prepare a delicious cake or pie

Note to culinary specialists: the time has come for you to bake delicious pies from apples and berries. Surely your work took up a lot of your time, and you don’t even remember the last time you baked charlotte. Catch up!

Prepare several types of this pie. Share recipes with friends or treat them to your creation.

Alina, 21 years old. Sales Manager

— The weather doesn’t spoil the mood at all. Surprisingly. On the contrary, you are looking forward to winter and the onset of the New Year's bustle. In my free time I read books or, if it’s quite warm outside, go to the cinema. I like autumn, despite its sometimes harsh winds.

Spend time with friends

If you can’t imagine how you can be left alone with your thoughts at this time of year, then go visit and spend time with friends. You can not only drink tea while talking about painful issues, but also watch a movie and play board games.

You won’t notice how time flies, and with it the blues. If you don’t want to stay at home, you can go with a group to a movie or a concert.

Elena, 25 years old. Marketer

— Autumn is an aggravation of everything bad around us. Everyone is sick, feeling bad, and no one is in a good mood. At a time like this, it's more important than ever to pay attention to those around you. Just find out how a person is doing, come visit, drink hot mulled wine and talk about painful things. Well, of course, you also need to take care of yourself. Don't overexert yourself and give yourself rest as much as possible.

go to master classes

Recently, a large number of master classes have been held in our city: how to become rich and self-confident, how to learn to draw, knit, play, and so on. Find something you like. As a rule, the first visit to such courses is free.

Take a few classes and maybe you will become an artist or an actor with a capital A, learn to cook well or bungee jump.

visit an unusual exhibition, go to a movie or a new performance

Watching movies at home is, of course, cheaper and more convenient, but if you’ve been sitting at home for a long time, then it’s time to go out. In some cinemas you can buy tickets inexpensively if you come, for example, in the afternoon or in the morning. Autumn is the time of premieres: concerts, exhibitions, shows - whatever your heart desires. Time to open the doors of the Tyumen Drama Theater or get acquainted with the city's youth theaters.

In the city you can visit time cafes, cinemas, concerts, performances and much more almost around the clock. You can go to a time cafe alone; here you will definitely find company to play a console or board game, or just read while drinking free tea and cookies.

Irina, 24 years old. Technical specialist in a law firm

— In the fall, I try to devote more time to my favorite hobbies - I go to performances at the Tyumen Drama Theater, Philharmonic Society, and also attend rock concerts. Moreover, it is in the fall that the theater and concert season opens. Attending such events helps me take my mind off the autumn sadness and recharge with powerful energy from live music and acting. At home I draw, read books and spend more time with my warm cat.

discover something new: learn a language, play sports

If you have always put off exercising until tomorrow, then tomorrow has already come. No one will force you to exercise regularly, but you can always run for half an hour around the house before work, do exercises in front of the TV, or walk two stops home.

This way you will not only improve your health, but also take your mind off bad thoughts. And if you can’t tear yourself away from your computer monitor or phone screen, then register in foreign language learning groups. A couple of learned phrases a day - and in a month you will already be a polyglot.

Alexey, 17 years old. Student, Chairman of the Commission on Social and Political Affairs of the Public Youth Chamber under the Duma of the Tyumen Municipal District

— Innate optimism helps me fight the autumn blues. I try to enjoy any weather - even the coldest and wettest. In addition, communication with family and friends also helps me. In general, autumn is my favorite time of year and the blues almost never overtake me, especially considering that my birthday is in the fall.

sort out the wardrobe, rearrange the apartment

Before the winter cold, it's time to throw out the junk from your home, organize a rearrangement, or update your wardrobe. Order new purchases online without extra charges or shop around looking for discounts. Make room in your closet for new purchases, and throw away or donate old items.

It's time to clear some time on the balcony and in the garage, go to garage sales and book exchanges.

Polina, 25 years old. Head of commercial department

— I come home after work, turn on the series, eat some treats and play with the cat. She entertains me.

Maria, 26 years old. Mom, housewife

— I think everyone is familiar with the manifestations of the blues. In autumn I always want warmth and colors. Delicious, invigorating tea with lemon, barberry, passion fruit, mint, cozy bright clothes and your favorite perfume help add magic to gray everyday life. In the evenings, board games with the family are a great way to lift your spirits. A warm bath with fragrant salt and new books about the most important things - all this helps me feel happy.

Add physical activity or extreme sports

The author of the book Focus, Daniel Goleman, divides our thinking into two types. This is a “wandering mind” when you constantly keep some worries in your head. For example, you think about what you need to buy in the store in the evening, what the manager will say at the planning meeting tomorrow. And the “here and now” state is maximum concentration on the task.

The founder of the WB-Tech company, Kirill Grishanin, believes that the state of “here and now” can be trained with the help of “high-speed” physical exercises. It turns out to be a kind of exercise that pulls our brain out of the “wandering” state.

“Now my mental exercise, which I do every day, is a bike ride to the coworking space. It could also be snowboarding down a mountain or training complex combinations on a trampoline. It’s difficult to race on a board at a speed of 50 km/h and be upset that the customer does not transfer money,” says Kirill Grishanin.

Various studies show the benefits of exercise for the brain and psyche. It is not necessary to engage in sports professionally; a few hours of exercise a week are enough, and those that you like.

For clarity of mind and memory development, engage in cyclic exercise - run, ride a bike, swim. Strength training is needed to find new ideas and develop creativity. Intense team games or martial arts will help with concentration.

How does self-isolation affect the human psyche?

Quarantine measures are important and necessary - everyone understands this. But prolonged self-isolation does not have the most beneficial effect on a person’s mental health.

Everyone has their own psycho-traumatic factor. Some people have a hard time experiencing the instability of the economic situation and possible job loss. For others, staying at home for a long time and not being able to go anywhere becomes unbearable. Still others are worried about loved ones who are in other cities. Someone is sick and cannot receive qualified medical care.

All this triggers the mechanism of chronic stress and mental exhaustion. There is a narrowing of perception. A person sees only what is associated with a stressful situation. Many people experience anxiety disorders, panic attacks, and chronic diseases worsen. The feeling of fear and anxiety begins to haunt constantly. If you don’t help yourself in time, the result will be a deterioration in your physical and mental condition.

Coping with stress

What is important for a person’s mental health is not the absence of fear and anxiety, but the ability to cope with these feelings, recognize and live them:

Put your experiences into words. Then it will be easier for you to understand what is happening to you (“I’m worried about my family so that they don’t get sick from the virus. I’m worried that I’ll have to change jobs soon. I’m angry that my husband doesn’t support me”).
Remember that almost the entire world is now in a similar situation. Each of us is fighting the virus as best we can. And staying at home is one of the most effective ways.
Reorganize your thinking in a positive way. Not “how tired I am of noisy children,” but “how good it is that my loved ones are next to me.” Not “another long day at home,” but “how many things can I get done today.”
The cheapest medicine is to stay busy. Don't forget this.
If you are worried about anxiety disorders and panic attacks, do not hesitate to seek help from psychologists and psychotherapists. Many have switched to online consultations and will definitely help you cope with your worries.

How not to destroy family relationships during self-isolation?

Self-isolation is a test of the strength of both family and parent-child relationships. If conflicts and difficulties in understanding each other were already brewing, now they can manifest themselves in all their glory.

Even in prosperous families, when people are in a confined space for a long time, quarrels and quibbles over trifles inevitably begin.

To prevent self-isolation from leading to the collapse of family relationships, follow these recommendations:

Think of self-isolation not as a period of being forced to be with each other, but as a time to become closer to your family: to feel warmth and tenderness for your husband and children, and to support your parents.
Talk more often with your family and friends about their experiences, feelings, and thoughts.
Make joint plans for the future. Make an action plan after the end of self-isolation, where you would like to go or go.
Take care of your own health and the health of your family members.
During quarrels and conflicts, do not let negative emotions take over. It’s hard for everyone: both children and parents. During this difficult period, you should not take it out on your loved ones.
Everyone experiences a stressful situation in their own way: for some it is easier to be alone, for others they need words of support and hugs. Respect the personal space of each family member.

Helping a child cope with being at home for a long time

Children are also experiencing stress during self-isolation. The need for movement, communication with friends, active and varied games is limited. Schoolchildren are busy with distance learning, but they also find it difficult to sit within four walls.

To help their child cope with these difficulties, psychologists advise parents the following:

try to maintain a calm, friendly environment at home;
Explain to the child what is happening in an accessible form;
talk with your child about his experiences, feelings, thoughts. Share yours too. Tell us about your experience of overcoming difficult life situations. Give hope that everything will end well. Children who receive support and empathy from their parents cope with stress better;
Teach your child to cope with their emotions. Aggression can be expressed through physical exercise and physical activity, mental anxiety - through a confidential conversation with loved ones. If it is difficult for a child to trust you with his experiences, advise him to keep a diary where he can describe everything that worries him;
If your child is having difficulties with distance learning, be sure to help him. And you will have less time for negative thoughts, and the child will feel your support and interest in his affairs;

the more physical activity a child has around the house, the faster his body will begin to fight stress;
joint activities between children and parents relieve anxiety, promote positive emotions and allow you to get to know each other better;
if a child is afraid of getting sick, reassure him, tell him that following certain rules will provide protection from the virus: wash your hands, follow a daily routine, ventilate the room, do exercises, etc.;
A child needs communication not only with his parents, but also with his peers. If possible, organize it online;
The more new experiences a child gets at home, the easier it will be for him to survive the period of self-isolation. Organize a theatrical performance for him where he can play the main role himself. Create a group drawing with all family members on a large poster. Organize a fashion show followed by a photo shoot. In general - any positive emotions instead of anxiety and worries about the future.

Looking for interesting activities for children and adults during quarantine in schools and self-isolation, see our article What to do with a child during quarantine?

How to survive self-isolation alone?

Do what brings you satisfaction and pleasant emotions.
Communicate with friends and family by phone, Skype, and social networks.
Use self-isolation as a time to get to know yourself, your true desires and needs.
Don't forget about physical activity.
If you have the strength and opportunity, consider volunteering. It is easier for a person to cope with stress when he finds active activity in a situation of uncertainty. There are many people who need your help, so don't stand aside.

Any crisis is difficult. But we can cope by helping each other, observing self-isolation and simply continuing to love our loved ones. A crisis, even such a severe one, is not forever. And when it’s over, you can return to your normal life in full force and become even better than you were before self-isolation!

Get plenty of rest this weekend

Remote work often becomes stressful not because of the work tasks themselves, but because of our inability to relax outside the home. It used to be like this: we work 5 days a week in the office, and spend Saturday and Sunday at home. Nowadays, many of us spend every day in the apartment, so it’s better to change the environment on the weekends.

You can go out of town, travel around the region in search of interesting authentic places. See what ecotourism is offered near your city? Maybe there's a cheese farm or the opportunity to go on a day hike.

If you can’t get out into the region, try to find something new in the city. Look for local activities, such as playing sports in parks or walking in the hills to watch the sunset. Try “street” hobbies - landscape photography, Nordic walking, scootering or rollerblading.

Create an activity plan for children

When working remotely, you need to learn how to plan. Make a list of things you can do to quickly keep your child occupied. This will help if you have to make an urgent call at work or a sudden task arises.

Practice anticipating unexpected situations. When you have a plan, it's easier to act.

To organize herself several hours of quality work a day, Pharmedu CEO Tatyana Khodanovich created a routine, like in a kindergarten. Leisure centers that offered various activities for children helped her with this.

Maternity leave is a great time to learn something new

CONTENT:

Learn something you've always wanted to do, for example, a foreign language. Memorize 10 new words a day - in six months your vocabulary will increase by 1800 words.

Get a new profession. There are many distance learning options on the Internet. You can get a higher education by attending lectures on Skype or completing web design courses. If you have the opportunity to leave your child with your grandmother, you can enroll in a correspondence course and attend sessions twice a year.

While your child is sleeping, read books on self-development or a new profession. Download an audiobook on a topic that interests you and listen to it while you walk with the stroller. While playing with your baby, turn on a useful program or seminar.

Rent an office

Problems in remote work sometimes begin due to the need to work close to loved ones. On the one hand, you are constantly distracted by requests and worries. On the other hand, it is also difficult for relatives to sit in silence all the time. Irritation builds up.

Try to find an “office” close to home. It seems that this option is only suitable for highly paid specialists, but this is not so. Often, a remote worker only needs a small, quiet space.

Look for rooms in old research institutes that have now been converted into office complexes - there is no luxury there, but the price is usually several times lower than in business centers. Or rent a small apartment. The costs can be divided among several people, as freelancers often do.

Pavel Molyanov, co-founder of the Let's Do agency, says that for the first six months he freelanced in a one-room apartment with a small child. To avoid distractions, I had to work with headphones.

As a result, he decided to rent a room in the basement and equip it as an office. “Work has become much more comfortable: there are no distractions, you might think,” says Pavel Molyanov. “I stopped feeling the discomfort of stressing my family by forcing them to sit in silence all day. Now I’m working at home again, but this is a different apartment, I have my own office and therefore no one bothers anyone.”

Water signs - on the bed!

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How can representatives of the water element survive autumn and winter?

Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces know that only love will save us. Therefore, in the fall they persistently look for it, take care of it and share it with others. Now you need someone for a couple or at least temporary company. And for a good atmosphere that will attract the senses.
The time for effective magical rituals, important dreams and premonitions that cannot be wrong begins now for you.
To the heart - through the stomach. You will feel peace and bliss when you feed everyone. Just turn off the TV: don’t let it distract you with any unnerving information. Candles, music and the divine smell from the oven - this is worth living for!
Sex will help too - or a few other strong emotions. Crime, horror or fantasy will excite your imagination.
You can also study something esoteric. Learn to deal with tarot cards, delve into the secrets of astrology, interpret dreams and signs. You don’t need to force yourself to be overly active right now. Various things need to be organized in your heart, and spiritual development is more important than physical exercises or social responsibilities.

Photo: https://pixabay.com/ru

https://leninogorsk-rt.ru/news/novostnaya-lenta/kak-perezhit-osen-i-zimu-i-ne-soyti-s-uma-podskazhet-vash-znak-zodiaka

Prepare your work area

If the office doesn’t work out, make yourself a workspace at home. It’s not just a laptop and your favorite sofa - it’s better to organize at least a table and an armchair so as not to mix the space for living and working.

“Don't eat at the computer. First of all, it's harmful. And secondly, you blur the boundaries of your workplace and do not allow your brain to switch and change the environment,” warns corporate psychologist Ksenia Lukasheva.

In the office, your manager takes care of the arrangement of the workplace. At home you will have to think through everything yourself. According to Natalya Storozheva, general director of the Perspective business and career development center, it is important to work out technical issues: ensure uninterrupted Internet, good mobile communications, a comfortable chair or a fenced-off corner. “The ergonomics of the space is important so that business documents, work materials and a laptop are always at hand,” says the expert.

Organize your work processes

A comfortable state depends not only on working equipment; when working remotely, communication problems arise. If previously you could simply approach a colleague and immediately get an answer to your question, now you have to communicate through email or instant messengers.

Of course, organizing work processes is the task of the manager. But if something is bothering you specifically, you can try to take the initiative into your own hands. For example, offer to agree on how and in what situations you need to communicate with colleagues - we solve simple issues by mail, urgent ones for a specific messenger. If the question cannot be postponed at all, we’ll call you.

If you lead a team, take care of your subordinates - they must understand how to work now.

“We created a manual on the corporate portal,” says Alexander Bochkin, General Director of Infomaximum. — Now every employee knows who to contact on this or that issue. Colleagues also received recommendations on planning work remotely. We have arranged for home delivery of workstations, peripherals and even office chairs.”

Watch your appearance

Corporate psychologist Ksenia Lukasheva believes that business clothes put us in the mood for work. Therefore, even if you do not need to leave the house, still change from home clothes to work clothes. Let it be at least jeans and a T-shirt, but special ones in which you “go” only to work.

“Start internal processes with external incentives,” advises Dina Maksimova, head of the HR department at Vezet Group. - Our brain is accustomed to rituals, use it. Don't start work in your pajamas, especially if you haven't done this before. Clothes, hairstyle and even makeup can help and encourage productive work.”

Requests for help Write your story There was an injury to the abdomen, chest and neck. Pain when eating, muscle tension, nagging pain, either an injury to the esophagus or an injury to the neuromuscular system. Examinations show nothing. The injury is visible when you turn off the digestive tract from food. I can’t turn off the power myself; I won’t eat; they’ll take me to a mental hospital. There was no help, they made it even worse. They don’t take you to a regular hospital by ambulance, and they don’t give you a free referral to a clinic for examination in a hospital either. I suffer from pain every day. I’m preparing for death, I’m crying in despair, I’m only 32, I want to live, I don’t even have children. The pain makes me go crazy and I want to fall into a coma or commit suicide. I do not know what to do. And I don’t even know how to get to the hospital for examination. Support the site:

Antonina, age: 32 / 06/16/2016

Responses:

We need to put pressure on the head of the therapy department, nothing more, let them prescribe strong analgesics or give a referral. Write complaints in the end. Don’t give up!

Sadness, age: 34 / 06/16/2016

Hello. You need to clarify whether your condition is related to trauma or whether it is more of a psychological disorder. Choose the right treatment. Everything is back to normal! Good health to you!

Irina, age: 28 / 06/16/2016

My sunshine, good health to you! Don’t give up, complain to doctors about your symptoms, tell them how painful and bad you are, how bad you feel. Doctors will help you in any case. Let them refer you for repeated examinations and other procedures, prescribe adequate treatment, involve relatives and friends, you will be provided with support. I had a mini-stroke in February, so they enrolled me in a clinic to see a neurologist almost without documents (the clinic was not at my place of residence). I complained, moaned, said how bad I felt, and in the end the manager. dept. made concessions. The main thing here is to try not to make a scandal or be rude to the medical staff, this is important. Don’t even think about suicide, this is a wrong and erroneous path. I hug you, I am with you morally, if you wish, write here.

Mikhail, age: 24/06/16/2016

Thank you all very much for your response and words of support. And thank you Mikhail for your kind words. I wish you to get better and not get sick.

Antonina, age: 32 / 06/16/2016

Antonina, hello. Look for “your” doctor, sometimes you can’t find a good specialist the first time. Make an appointment with another therapist or even go to a payer or a regional hospital for a paid appointment. There is no smoke without fire, there must be some reason - physical or psychological, but your doctor just doesn’t see it. At one time I also encountered incompetent doctors, it was very offensive. Do not give up. Good health to you!

Julia, age: 29 / 06/16/2016

Hello dear girl, Tonechka! I hug you, you are great, you will succeed, don’t give up! I will pray for you, God willing, good doctors will come along and help! I hope everything will be fine, we are with you in our thoughts, hold on and take care of your strength, don’t despair. Of course, it’s great that you dream of children, a family, everything is possible in this world, I was also very depressed when they said that after the removal of the tumor, you need to wait with the children, and it’s best to forget altogether. But I prayed that there would be a good person nearby. There is a technique of “visualization” when you imagine your healthy body, your unborn child, your husband, how you will feel when this happens. And then you mentally release it like a ball into the sky. I even imagined being in oncology surgery. And after a while everything came true. Although I was approaching forty and my health was very good. May God grant you to experience a lot of happiness and love and more!

Zinaida, age: 42 / 06/16/2016

Hello, Tonechka! I read your story and remembered how we pulled my mother out of the same state. Mom had rheumatoid arthritis. She lay there for many years, almost motionless. Thanks to this, some nerve was pinched in her. And at one far from wonderful moment, she simply stopped eating. She was examined by many doctors in Kharkov. She was treated in neurology and psychiatry, but no one could help... Can a person live for 7 months without food, completely? Don’t count 1-2 raspberries a day as food, which we literally asked her to eat on our knees... When women in my mother’s room started discussing recipes for some dishes, my mother would have an attack... She simply couldn’t breathe... Mom herself, dad, doctors , and I also understood that this was the end. Relatives went to the hospital to say goodbye, they wanted to discharge my mother as incurable... in general, let her die at home, but then my dad freaked out. :))) He got my mother transferred to a hospital with a completely different profile, to a very young, but very promising doctor. In general, my mother was literally put back on her feet... by a rheumatologist. :)))) She prescribed her some unrealistic medications that suppressed her nervous system to the core, but... after a few months, my mother finally, herself, with pleasure, I ate a bowl of soup:))))))). Almost 25 years have passed since then, and I still remember that feeling of happiness: Mom will live!!! She drank crazy doses of medicines, some vitamins according to a cunning scheme. :)))) However, later it was difficult to get off them, but we did it!!!! Why am I telling this, Tonechka!!! You need to find a good, interested doctor, not necessarily a neurologist, but definitely interested in your recovery... And one more thing... I was 11 years old then. And I want to say that never, neither before nor after, have I prayed as much as I prayed for my mother then... day and night... So, your recipe: prayer, fortitude and a good doctor! I believe you can do it!!!

Svetlana, age: 34 / 06/16/2016

If you have pain when eating, you can try chopping food and eating this porridge without chewing, this will reduce the suffering. And also ask for painkillers. But in general, the reason may not only be neck pain, but also loneliness?

Alexander, age: 23 / 06/17/2016

Thank you very much, Tonya! Honey, what do doctors even say, if it’s not a secret? What studies were done? Tonya, maybe it’s worth turning to paid medicine, if finances allow. There are large diagnostic centers, etc. They have connections with hospitals. At least I did this in difficult moments and it helped me out more than once. And the quality of the prescribed treatment is in most cases quite good, although there are exceptions (and where are there not?). In my opinion, you can’t skimp on your health. Maybe we need to help somewhere... The main thing is not to panic, the disease is afraid of strong people, that’s a fact. I’ve almost completely recovered, followed all the doctor’s orders, didn’t panic (although I was scared, various diagnoses were called: from MS to a brain aneurysm), only there are small problems with my right lateral vision, it sticks a little, I can’t turn sharply over my right shoulder , the ground is disappearing from under your feet... But these are already trifles compared to what happened. Antonina, hold on, we’ll break through! Try not to isolate yourself. I will be glad to receive a reply message)

Mikhail, age: 24 / 06/17/2016

Hello!!! Thank you all very much. From the examinations, Mikhail did a lot of things: X-ray of the esophagus, gastroscopy, on the nervous system, EEG, REG, ultrasound, various ultrasounds, MRI with contrast of the abdominal cavity. I haven’t really checked the muscles, and I probably need a CT scan of my esophagus. In general, it is very difficult to diagnose both muscle injury and esophageal injury. In general, as long as you walk on your own feet, they won’t find anything, only probably when they take you out on a stretcher, then it will be too late. And I can barely walk anymore. I didn’t even get to the metro once, I got out at the station, people gave Validol, they wanted to call an ambulance, but I sat out and went on my own. The ambulance won’t pick me up and will take me to some terrible hospital, so they took me 2 times a long time ago when the first symptoms began to appear and they’ll do nothing, x-rays won’t find anything and will send me back. I would like to go to a good multidisciplinary hospital, to the 1st city hospital named after Pirogov or to Botkinskaya where there are more opportunities to be examined. But how to get there is the question. I’ll probably last until they either carry me out on a stretcher or die at home. I also don’t want to die at home without my family seeing me. I just wore them out.

Antonina, age: 32 / 06/17/2016

I'm so glad you responded! Antonina, my sunshine, you should only be optimistic! Only with this attitude can you defeat almost any disease. I can understand how bad you feel, I imagined myself in your place and in general, your story touched me greatly. I don’t want to leave you alone with my problems, even if I am morally, but still next to you, hugging you and holding your hand. In order to get to a decent clinic, and in general, to prescribe effective and efficient treatment, it is still necessary to consider solving this problem in a financial way, the only way, well, you can’t save on your health! Otherwise, you will continue to be sent to these terrible hospitals. It is advisable to conduct all studies, if possible, on modern equipment. Ask relatives, friends, acquaintances for help; you should not wait for the next exacerbation of symptoms. We must solve this problem together, as a single team! You have to twist and turn and not give up, complain about excruciating pain, say how bad you feel, be emotional (only in moderation!), these are effective methods. Check with your doctors any questions, any little things (even insignificant at first glance), you have every right to do so! Record everything for yourself and write it down. Please, I beg you, do not talk about death, this is clearly out of place here! With such an attitude, you will not achieve anything, that’s what my attending neurologist told me. What I recommended to you is solely my opinion, I apologize if I said something wrong, the decision is up to you. You have a very beautiful name, Antonina, believe me. And remember: in most cases, all problems can be solved. Antonina, please hang in there, your problem can be solved!

Mikhail, age: 24 / 06/17/2016

Tonechka, dear! Get treatment, don't give up! But be sure to pray! Ask the Lord to help. He hears everything. If it’s difficult for you, you can invite a priest to your home, confess and receive communion (if you are baptized). If it is not difficult for you to drink, drink holy water, at least a little at a time, but always with prayer. Ask people to pray for you! I will pray, and if you want, I can ask really church-going, kind people to pray - their prayer is strong. Write, we worry and pray for you!

Jerry, age: 22 / 06/17/2016

Hello Antonina. I sympathize with you from the bottom of my heart. I myself have been suffering from a severe illness for a couple of months now, and I’m waiting for it to pass. There are moments of despair in which you want anything to make it go away. I pray. A short prayer - Lord, help, have mercy, give me strength to survive all this, give me strength not to go crazy. I've been praying for so long. And you know, strength appears. And due to this, the disease becomes more tolerable. The doctors have already written to you regarding complaints. I wish you to get well soon and that your thoughts become correct and wise and bring you great relief.

Inna, age: 26 / 06/18/2016

Hello, you can come to the emergency department of any emergency hospital, present with pain, and they must admit you (take your documents with you). I’ve been living with constant pain for 6 years now, constant restrictions, etc., I even play sports through the pain, but don’t you think it’s a blessing when it “let go”?) You will be cured, or at least go into a period of remission, and take a closer look at the issue about children. It is very important to find a knowledgeable doctor, in extreme, most desperate cases, it may make sense to write on TV, now there are a lot of TV shows with the participation of doctors, so at least you can pay attention to your problem! At least somehow we need to try to solve the health issue! We have to start somewhere, from sitting at home, unfortunately we are not cured (I know from myself). Try it! Everything will be fine! Good luck and good health to you!

Julia, age: 38 / 07/19/2016

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Filter the information flow

This advice also applies to regular office work, but in a remote format it becomes especially relevant - control the flow of information. Avoid news rumors and fake news. The less bad news the better.

“In general, I would recommend not watching news on TV or reading newsletters in various chats like school-parent chats about the second and third waves of the pandemic and other horrors, but studying news on the Internet in reliable media. Take care of your psyche, it will be useful to you,” says psychologist and art therapist Natalya Koroteeva.

Strive for completed actions

There is an opinion that it is more difficult to get a promotion when working remotely; supposedly colleagues notice less the contribution of such an employee to the common cause. This is partly true - managers don’t see us remotely, many value personal communication more than correspondence.

Responsible remote employees suffer from impostor syndrome - it is difficult to objectively evaluate their own work. It is also worth considering the lack of approval, support and career prospects. For example, when we give a report to a manager in the office, he can immediately skim through it and praise it. Remotely, we simply send a letter and receive minimal feedback in return.

Director of HR and Organizational Development at S8 Capital Holding Tatyana Gladyuk recommends focusing employees on more specific and shorter tasks.

“This way people will understand what is required of them, quickly navigate the task and independently build steps to achieve results. Be sure to thank them for their work and express your support in other ways. This motivates employees to work better,” advises Tatyana Gladyuk.

If your work consists of long-term projects, then try to break them up into small pieces yourself - 1-2 hours of work.

Checklist: how to maintain mental stability remotely

Here is a list of points that will help you solve problems productively and not go crazy from the sudden remote work format:

Create a work schedule. It is better if he is the same as his colleagues. At certain times you do business and are in touch. Before and after - no work and not even short calls.
Alternate rest and work. Try several formats, for example, 45 minutes of work and 15 minutes of rest. Or 25 and 5. Stop at what's comfortable.
Get some exercise. Do this regularly. Choose activities that you like.
If the children are at home, create a to-do list for them. When your child requires attention and you have a work day, use an activity prepared in advance.
In order not to distract your family, try renting an office - it doesn’t have to be expensive, even a small apartment with Internet will do. If that doesn’t work, organize a separate place at home.
Set up workflows. If problems arise in communications, agree on communication formats. Colleagues need to know through which communication channel they can discuss tasks.
Watch your appearance, do not work in pajamas.
Find activities that interest you. Don't spend your weekends at home.

What to do if your loved one goes crazy in your arms?

After Sinead O'Connor's sensational video message, where she talks about her mental problems, Facebook user Boris Werks wondered why people are so rarely given advice on how to behave with loved ones when they are, colloquially speaking, going crazy.

And I tried to do it myself. Here is his list of the most important things to do or not do when a loved one has a mental illness.

Don't try to rationalize it

This is especially important if you have an innovating brain. There is no need to find a key for a person who is going crazy in this state. If the pilot of an airplane caught in turbulence starts pressing all the buttons in a panic, he has a much greater chance of crashing than of getting out of the turbulence and landing him.

You do roughly the same thing when you yourself try to help a person unravel the chain that leads to madness. Most likely, you will simply load it with new links: additional guilt, false hypotheses. Is it dangerous.

No matter how cruel it may sound, all this had to be done before the person was on the brink.

To simplify, madness is a consequence of an advanced chemical failure of the brain; you cannot reverse the process through this failure, or cheat the random number generator. To do this requires years of very specific education and experience and a lot of luck, which you definitely don't have if you're already in this situation.

For example, there is no need to try to appeal to the good: a person who is going crazy perceives the presence of a job, money, a good apartment, children, the health of loved ones, good weather, differently than you do. I would say that you don't have to try to understand it, otherwise you won't be able to work as a counterbalance to the madness.

Force to speak out

The only available way to fight madness is to expel it from the body, like an infection. At a minimum, you can buy time to regroup, and at maximum, you can save a person. How to do it? Ask a person to pronounce in detail everything that is happening in his head, without judging him in anything, without being surprised by anything, question him, try to understand and say that you understand (even if you don’t understand at all, because now it doesn’t matter), not express anything their attitude towards this, other than acceptance. Madness must be taken out into the light with spoons, without leaving it the opportunity to accumulate in dark corners and multiply by division; for this it must be reprimanded.

If you need a distraction, you need to give the person a pencil and a notebook so that he can write non-stop about everything that is going on in his head. By the way, these notes will then be very helpful in working with a psychotherapist.

Take care of yourself like Vitya, be careful like Tsoi

On an airplane, you put the oxygen mask on yourself first, then on your baby. In a hermetically sealed situation of insanity, it's the same. If you don't take care of yourself physically (eating, sleeping, hygiene), you won't be able to help your loved one. If you allow yourself to become limp, you will get hit by a car, and in such situations you are crazier than a madman.

Even a not very sensitive person is always influenced by the state of a loved one, watch yourself: I would say that a person who is supporting a loved one most likely needs therapy himself.

Imitate life

People in general are pretty stupid, about like the average designer or cat. Any person, not only in a state of psychosis, is always stupider than his own body. Fortunately, the brain is part of the body. Imitation of life is like fake it till you make it, only your task is not to help a person become better, but simply to survive.

You cannot leave your consciousness alone for too long. You need to carefully do what a person can still do from what he is used to doing. Cook dinner together. Walk in the park with ice cream. Watch a movie together. Do something that unites you and does not require special reflection from your loved one, self-evaluation, self-relationship with someone and you. Go somewhere where a person has always felt calm in normal life. Your task is to keep the mind in the body, for this you need to deceive the body - imitating normal life.

Ground

It is important to do what causes the brain to pay attention to the body and process the signals coming from it, instead of what it actually wants to do.

Anything that distracts a person from his consciousness in favor of his body will do: sit in the bathroom, have sex, go out to breathe different air, get a radical haircut, go for a massage. In general, physical things are very important. The separating consciousness must be made to understand that, in fact, it is not on its own, but here below there is still life and no one has canceled it.

Break isolation but avoid toxic communication

When the mind is separated from the body, the worst thing that can be done is to provide it with comfortable conditions for this: to keep it within four walls, to satisfy its desire for complete isolation from the environment and its own life. Find people in your environment who are as devoid of judgment and condemnation as possible and can simply accept a person in this state, spend time with them. Sometimes a simple silent hug is enough to stop the madness. Talk about what is happening with someone else.

This point has an important difficult point: sometimes you yourself are a factor in the deterioration of the condition (for example, if you are in a couple). No matter how difficult it may be, ask yourself if you can’t just be making things worse and think about what you can do about it, but in such a way as not to abandon your loved one.

Tolerate aggression

This is probably the hardest thing that can happen in the world and almost nothing can be said about it. It is important to accept: it is not your loved one who is aggressive, it is his illness. You can’t make the disease go away, but you will definitely cripple the weakened mind of a person who can still be saved if you don’t control your own reaction. Our Lutheran friend Utkina once said that a true Christian does not accept sin, but not the sinner. You don't have to be a believer to make an analogy.

At the same time, it is important to analyze aggression, because aggression is also a vehicle for bringing out madness. What comes out aggressively probably comes out that way because it's important.

I have nowhere to write about suicidal thoughts, so I’ll add it here: just by default, perceive them as a real, maximum dangerous threat, even if the person never talked about it in his life before the illness and you cannot imagine that your loved one is capable of this. Suicidal thoughts are a cry for help, don’t try to ignore it.

Turn off the brain

A person going crazy is like an overheated computer. If your computer overheats, you turn it off so it stops working and wait until it cools down, the same with a person. To do this, you can walk, force a person to do something that will make him physically tired faster (but not exhaust him). Your task is to bring the body to a smooth discharge in the evening so that the brain can cool down and reboot during sleep. Therefore, it is extremely important to restore or create from scratch a sleep regime (even if a person does not get enough sleep, we are not talking about quality of life here). You should never pass out with alcohol or any mind-altering drugs (if you have friends or relatives who are prone to this, limit their influence).

Watch your food and water

A person who is struggling with his own consciousness may not be able to simultaneously take care of his body, and this is a big catch, because he does not have the strength to fight the disease. Find what the person can eat in this state and make sure he eats and drinks.

Avoid unnecessary innervation

For example, there is no need to watch films in which the hero goes crazy, absurdist plays, read Shakespeare, or find yourself in additional surreal situations. In ordinary life, you don’t pay attention to these things (and even look for them yourself), but there are a huge number of them around.

And 2 most important points in a row.

Take him to a psychotherapist/psychiatrist right now

Not to a psychologist, a priest, sick colleagues, a forum of armchair experts, a self-development coach, to the gym or to work.

When you have a broken leg, you don't go to a beautician, you go straight to a surgeon.

How to choose a therapist?

You need to clearly describe the situation to him from the outside (perhaps your loved one is not able to do this adequately himself). The therapist must be confident in his abilities and experience, or redirect you to another specialist.

It is difficult to identify a good therapist before the first session, but it is quite possible after. The most important thing: the therapist will never tell a person what to do. This is a direct violation of ethics. If the therapist says - drink wine, go to the sea and play sports, please hit him backhand with any heavy object. The therapist helps develop a course of action, but this can only be a mutual, analytical process, and it does not happen in an hour. The therapist does not promise results in 4 meetings and does not promise results at all, because he physically cannot.

If you feel uncomfortable with the therapist, it’s better to leave - you don’t have time to get used to it. The ability to create the most trusting atmosphere possible is the primary responsibility of the therapist. If you have concerns that the therapist may not respect the patient's confidentiality, run away from him.

The therapist will not go somewhere without your consent, deliberately causing pain - he will carefully prepare you for this.

The therapist will not judge you or criticize your thoughts.

Take pills if prescribed

And under no circumstances should you take your friend’s pills, pills that someone wrote about somewhere, take pills without weekly supervision from a specialist, or violate the dosage regimen.

Deciding on pills is often difficult, because they seem to legitimize madness. And there are also many opinions that this is for life, and you can still get fat, and this is also a conspiracy of pharmaceutical companies, and in general you are not such a weakling that you cannot cope without them. You can think about all this when you get a person to the state in which he can, in principle, think about something.

To not give up

Going crazy is physically very difficult and it doesn’t last forever: everything will either end in the hospital or it will get easier - this is a rather binary situation and both of these options are better than the uncertainty in which you are now. At the same time, it is definitely very easy to go crazy if you are left alone with yourself. If you rescued a loved one from the dead, there will most likely never be anything in your life that you can be more proud of.

I would not have known any of this if we had not gone through all this together with my wife Aliya, who has been heroically living with a mental disorder for 6 years. As, indeed, with most things I know.

Source

Illustration: Shutterstock

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