Good school performance is considered a guarantee that in the future a child will be able to get a profession and become successful. This is partly true: school instills discipline in a child, teaches him responsibility and lays the foundations for behavior in society. But if a child does not show interest in knowledge, studying becomes a boring and useless activity for him. Therefore, in order for a child to study well, parents need to develop his interest in learning, as well as the right motivation system.
Rule #1
Don’t know how to help your child study better, be more responsible, independent, and strong-willed? Let him go, give him freedom and the right to choose! Yes, at first he will make a million and one more mistakes, he will get a bad mark for the reporting test, he will go for a walk in an out-of-season jacket, he will freeze and possibly get sick, he will someday go hungry and lose his pocket money. All this will cause him to learn to survive on his own.
If he does not go through all these stages in childhood, when the psyche is flexible, and the child is able to adequately respond to problems, he will have to cope with all this in the difficult puberty period, or even as an adult.
Whose problem: mom, dad or child?
Before you begin to solve a problem, it is important to define it in principle. Therefore, you don’t always need to look for ways to help your child study better at school, you need to understand who needs it in the first place. Find out whether the child really is not keeping up with mastering the educational process, or whether his parents just think so.
The current educational program is very different from the one that mothers and fathers, and even more so, the grandparents of modern schoolchildren, studied with. The approaches to explaining the material, the way the material is presented, and most importantly, the assessment system have changed. It is important for parents to understand this before demanding exceptionally high scores from their child in all subjects. In addition, they simply have to find out for themselves: who needs good grades - them or the child, for whom will this become a source of pride, proof of success, a “ticket to the future”? Perhaps it is more comfortable for their son or daughter to be at the level of a solid good student, but by driving him (her) into the ranks of excellent students, parents make their own child an unhappy, exhausted and weak-willed person?
Briefly about the main thing
When a student really needs outside help, it is important to learn how to help the child learn better. We will present tips for solving this problem in the form of a list; we will also look at some points in more detail below:
- improving independence skills;
- organizing a proper daily routine;
- creating personal space;
- good nutrition;
- filling educational gaps;
- moral support and psychological assistance if necessary.
Having provided the child with these necessary conditions, parents are unlikely to return again to the question of how to help the child do well at school. Children who know how to solve their own problems without resorting to the help of adults and are not left alone with real difficulties grow up self-sufficient and purposeful, able to cope with feasible workloads, which, in principle, depends on their parents.
We find out the reason for failure
If parents do not know how to help their child study well and easily, they first need to determine the reasons for his poor grades. This is not always laziness or disobedience. In the case when a mother has provided her baby with everything necessary, but his grades at school still remain at an average level, or even confidently tend to be unsatisfactory, she needs to think about why this is happening.
Perhaps the reason lies in problems with friends, classmates, or teacher. Finding out this is quite simple: if the child remains silent and does not give a comprehensive answer to the questions posed, you can go to the class teacher and talk with specialized teachers. The problem can be very mundane and invisible to those close to you - family troubles (divorce of parents or simply a tense situation between them, other relatives), fatigue, illness, and even a misunderstanding of one of the subjects, which entails self-doubt. But how can you help your child study well in all these cases? Let's find out now.
When you need real help with your studies
Failure can unsettle any adult, let alone children, with their flexible, but rather fragile psyche. Having graduated from the relatively simple lower grades, the child is faced with many new difficulties and challenges. The office in which he studies, the class teacher changes, unfamiliar subjects appear, each of which is taught by a different teacher. How to help a child study better if all these innovations have become an obstacle and a challenge for him?
You can give him something with you to lessons that connects him with the simpler and more prosperous time of junior primary school. During this period, it is especially important to monitor the child’s progress. The slightest gap in his knowledge, resulting from a misunderstanding of one topic, will lead to problems with studying the material in the future.
Here is a very good recommendation on how to help a child do well at school - you need to “pull up” the level of his knowledge where it is insufficient. Each mother will decide for herself how to do this - on her own or with the help of a tutor.
What can parents do to help their child do well in school?
Parents' help in studying should not be limited to paying for tutors. Throughout the entire period of school life, a child may encounter a variety of difficulties, and parents are obliged to help him overcome them, showing personal involvement. What should parents do to ensure that their child studies well and pleases them with his successes?
Develop and maintain your child's interest in knowledge. Cognitive abilities need to be developed from the first years of a child’s life. Every day, strive to teach him something new and stimulate his interest in knowledge, and also teach him to look for answers to questions on his own. Of course, not all subjects in the school curriculum can arouse keen interest in a child. All children master some disciplines somewhat worse, since they have no inclination for them, and in such cases only “cramming” can help out. You should not focus on failures; it is better to praise for achievements in subjects that are easy for the child. Let him feel confident in his abilities - this will help him cope with those subjects that are not interesting to him.
Motivate your child correctly. In order for a child to do better at school, parents must take an active interest in how their studies are progressing. But in no case should you establish total control over the child. Warm and trusting relationships will allow you to solve school problems in the form of bad grades much more effectively than quarrels and punishments. If your child begins to have difficulties with his studies, do not scold him, but try to help so that he sees that you are on his side and feels your support. Help your child with difficult tasks and be sure to celebrate all his successes. Parental approval is one of the best motivations for good academic performance. But it should not be the main driving force: the child’s real interest in learning should come first. How to help a child study better with the help of some material incentives and is it worth using them at all? It's up to you to decide, but you shouldn't promise your child something desirable and expensive in exchange for good grades. This can create unnecessary pressure and fear of failure, and the child will study only to get what he wants. It is better to give such gifts unexpectedly, for example, at the end of a quarter completed without “C” grades, and only in cases where the child tried and put effort into studying.
Consistently increase the load. Every year the school curriculum becomes more complex and voluminous. Therefore, it is important from the very first grades to accustom the child to fully master the material and conscientiously complete homework. Otherwise, just a few missed classes in high school can lead to a deterioration in academic performance, and then to a reluctance to study at all. Make sure that every child’s homework has a result not only in the form of completed lessons, but also in the form of understood and well-learned material. From year to year, a child’s independent studies should become longer and more intense, because the academic load increases, and accordingly, more effort and time must be spent on mastering school material.
Learning through play
A sure-fire way to help your child learn better is to turn the boring educational process into a game, at least in part. Of course, it will be difficult for parents who are not teachers by profession and spiritual vocation to turn the solution of each problem into a spectacular action, and writing a dictation into an amazing fairy-tale journey, but they can improve the level of their child’s knowledge in a playful way and in a familiar home environment. What do I need to do?
- remember word games familiar from childhood, cities, a broken telephone - they perfectly stimulate memory, logic, and speech;
- buy good board games like Scrabble, Scrabble, Monopoly, Understand Me;
- conduct basic lessons in chemistry, physics, biology, and also demonstrate simple but visual experiments (visualization of the diffusion process using water and potassium permanganate, growing crystals from ordinary salt, identifying cells on an onion scale will convince any child that science can be interesting) .
In addition, it is better not to overload children with the same type of toys like cars and dolls. Puzzles, art and craft kits will bring him much more benefit.
Time management is a non-childish concept, useful for a child
No way to help a child study better will be effective in practice if the student’s day is overloaded with tasks, and his time for studying, extracurricular activities, hobbies, rest and idleness is not coordinated. In a child’s routine, you need to find the right time for everything:
- getting up and morning exercise;
- studies;
- rest;
- clubs, sections, hobbies;
- Homework;
- evening activities, communication with parents, games;
- going to bed.
These points can be adjusted to suit the personal regime of a particular child, but it is important that this very regime is, in principle, established. The lack of daily routine and chaos in life tires children, as a result they cannot concentrate on school, do not complete their homework, and begin to lag behind their more organized peers in the school curriculum.
Not only is the child too busy, but also too much free time has a negative impact. In the first case, the child has to experience simply colossal stress, which exhausts him mentally and physically, and in the second, he has to deal with the fact that the child begins to come up with things on his own. Of course, children should be given a few hours of the day to spend as they please, but when they have to spend the entire day like this, it rarely ends well.
How to help a student do well in school
Every student strives to prove himself during the school year. And every child can master the program, at least at the elementary level of education, with “good” and “excellent” marks. Because the programs are all standardized, and with the right approach you can master knowledge at a good, high-quality level. What conditions need to be created to get such a result? There are several simple rules for this.
Firstly, the daily routine. If a child sleeps well, spends time in the fresh air, is cheerful, cheerful, and does not get sick, then he listens attentively to the teacher in lessons. Fatigue is the root cause of failure.
Organizing your workplace. Teach your student to put his school supplies in their place: pens and pencils in a pencil case, not in a free-flying briefcase, notebooks in an organizer. A bookmark plays a big role in elementary school; when a teacher asks to open a textbook, with a bookmark the student will immediately open it without unnecessary fuss and haste.
Self-discipline will also help the child. During the lesson, he is faced with the task of listening carefully to the teacher’s explanations, and this requires disconnecting from external stimuli and acting arbitrarily. Therefore, in a playful way at home, it is necessary to develop the emotional-volitional sphere.
Active work in class. Involvement in the process, at a minimum, will not let him get bored in the lesson, and learning will take place through active activity.
Good nutrition is also important. A hungry student thinks only about food. Make sure your child has a snack with him in case he had a bad breakfast or had his unfavorite porridge in the morning.
To study for “good” and “excellent” grades, you need to rely not on quantitative, but on qualitative results, as well as systematically completing homework.
Another important factor is walking and changing activities. If a child attends sports clubs, artistic and aesthetic circles, this is wonderful.
But parents need to allocate time for the student in such a way that he does not overwork. Homework and its regularity are very important and this is where the main difficulty in distributing a child’s evening time lies. But you can distribute the time so that he can easily cope or make it as easy as possible for him to complete his homework. Therefore, it is very important to ensure that overfatigue does not set in, because the brain is designed in such a way that under high load, at a certain point in time it begins to block incoming signals, and learning at this moment becomes impossible, since the child simply does not assimilate the material. You can propose an average “20/20” work and rest scheme for children: the child works on homework for 20 minutes, and then engages in another activity for 20 minutes. In this scheme, the option does not work when he studies for 20 minutes, and after 20 minutes he plays on a gadget or computer games.
Parents often complain that they do homework for 3-4 hours and do not get anything done. But if a student sits every day for 3-4 hours and does something he doesn’t like, then he begins to hate it. Therefore, it is necessary to understand what is the reason for such a long completion: the child did not learn the topic of the lesson, or even more than one, and everything fell into a single snowball, or he is not interested or does not understand the purpose of completing the task? Or maybe the teacher did not notice the student’s efforts or reacted overly emotionally to his mistake and the student stopped believing in himself and avoided learning tasks in every possible way so as not to hear possible criticism addressed to him? “Training PRO” advises talking with the child to understand the reason for the reluctance to do homework and help solve them.
The path to successful study is through the stomach
It will not be a secret to anyone that a growing body needs to eat rationally and variedly. If a child does not receive any microelements or is malnourished, he not only does not gain weight, but his brain directly suffers.
Therefore, before helping a child study well with the help of various pedagogical techniques, moral teaching, punishment or rewards, you need to feed him well. Many have heard that fast carbohydrates help improve brain function, but they give short-term positive results.
Chocolates and sweets will not make children smart, but they will “give” significant health problems. The diet should include foods enriched with B vitamins (dark bread, greens), and the menu should also include cereals, milk, chicken, fish, beef liver, fresh vegetables and fruits, and nuts.
How to get your child interested in learning
So, the parents have determined why the child is doing poorly in school. What to do now? How to find a suitable way to motivate him and get him interested in studying?
Ineffectiveness of generally accepted methods of motivation
In modern society, three types of student motivation to study are especially common, which, according to many parents, can convince him to do his homework with inspiration.
The first type is motivation “for the future.” Parents describe to their child the successful future that will invariably be the result of excellent studies: “You will graduate from school and enter a prestigious institute. When you get your specialty, you will find a good job. You will earn a lot of money, provide yourself with an apartment and a car. And you can help your aging parents...And what you were taught at school will be useful to you more than once in life.”
From the point of view of mom and dad, knowing these things should be a motivating factor for their student. It seems to sound quite logical. However, according to research by psychologists, such motivation, in its abstractness, is not capable of influencing the child’s actions and leading him to study better.
Another type of stimulation that many parents use who do not know how to instill in their child a desire to learn is cognitive motivation. Moms and dads are sure that their child should be interested in how people lived in the past, how their native language differs from foreign languages, and what elements the air is made of. According to adults, by a certain age a child should develop a thirst for knowledge.
This motivation is somewhat closer to the truth, but it is also ineffective. When there was no Internet and various children's encyclopedias, and the only sources of information were books and television with three channels, then a schoolchild could really be interested in sitting in class for hours and listening to the teacher.
But today, many of the exciting and curious things are already familiar to children. On the Internet, educational programs and encyclopedias, a child can independently find everything that interests him. And teachers are left to teach the student boring things like the multiplication tables or the rules of the Russian language.
And finally, the last type of motivation, designed to interest a child in learning, is the belief that a successful student is supported and approved by others.
Good grades are the key to a positive attitude towards a student from classmates, teachers and parents. However, high scores are needed more by the child’s teachers and family than by the child himself.
What to do to make your child want to learn
How to help your child study well if he is bored at school? In this case, it is worth discussing his hobbies. It is quite possible that the time has already come to set priorities - the student is simply physically unable to be interested in everything that the diverse and voluminous school curriculum is trying to teach.
You can also start from what your child is doing outside of school. A 10-12 year old student already has a fully formed range of hobbies, and this should not be neglected. It is enough just to find a connection between these activities and school subjects.
How to force a child to study if it is difficult for him to understand a subject on his own? Here it is worth hiring a tutor or agreeing with the teacher to conduct additional classes. In addition, parents should devote more time to preparing lessons at home, examining difficult topics together with their child.
If a child is given a subject too easily, the main thing is not to miss the moment when interest in it has not yet disappeared. Perhaps it’s time to think about extracurricular activities and take part in city Olympiads. Or maybe it’s even worth transferring to a specialized school. One way or another, this is an occasion to once again meet with the teacher and discuss the prospects for further education.
In addition, in the struggle for your student to study better, try not to make common mistakes:
- Don't “stick labels.” Some parents do not skimp on offensive nicknames. The words “stupid” or “ignorant” are unlikely to make your child study harder. Quite the contrary - he can abandon any attempts to change anything for the better. Try, instead of throwing out your own irritation, try to solve the problem calmly and without unnecessary emotions and teach your child to ask for help with homework if necessary.
- Don't overpraise your student. The phrase “you are very capable, but lazy” will not add to his desire to immediately use his talents. Most often, this approach leads to the fact that the student does not strive to develop and devote more time and effort to learning, because he is “already very capable.” Any praise must be earned.
- You can interest a student in getting good grades with the help of material rewards. However, this should not be abused. If a child is accustomed to such barter, parents may become hostages of the existing relationship. And even for asking to wash the dishes, they may hear, “What will I get for this?” You should not completely abandon this method, but it is necessary to limit its use. Let's say a reward is given not for every mark, but for the successful completion of a quarter.
Some mothers and fathers try to figure out how to get their child to study, forgetting that children tend to copy their parents.
Organization of space is important
When considering tips on how to help a child study better at school, it is impossible to ignore the problem of normalizing children's life. What does it mean? And the fact that he should simply be comfortable studying, resting and sleeping. Parents should worry about the conditions in which their child lives: what bed he sleeps on, how good the lighting is in the room where he reads and writes, whether the desk and chair are appropriate for his height.
Healthy sleep allows the child’s body to rest, which means it allows the child to gain strength for the normal assimilation of new information, and during the night’s rest, the skills acquired during the past day are systematized. A child's bedroom is not a place for turning on the TV and family gatherings.
Motivation and demotivation
Should I pay my child for good grades? Well, which parent hasn’t asked himself a similar question? The problem of monetizing good grades at school is currently very acute in many families. Some parents believe that this is an excellent way out of the situation, explaining their point of view by saying that the child, wanting to get more pocket money, will study well. Others think such an impact is one-sided, they say, what to take from a student if he doesn’t try hard enough? After all, simply not giving him money is not a sufficiently effective punishment.
Is this motivational method good in general, and what to do if it no longer works? How to help your child study well? The advice of psychologists on this matter is quite clear - it makes no sense to buy a child’s grades in the first place. This will not instill healthy ambition in him; on the contrary, it will instill in his soul an unhealthy interest in money, and he will perceive receiving a normal education not as a means of achieving future life goals and plans, but as a duty for which he must be paid. What will happen when parents cannot allocate the required amount from their own budget for such a “salary”?
Choose the right motivation
It is unlikely that any parent wants the learning process to be reduced to cramming textbooks - that is why it is very important to awaken in the child an interest in science and its practical application in real life. Together, purchase colorful, interesting encyclopedias with simple explanations of theory on basic subjects, go to natural museums and planetariums more often, find a good channel with educational films, or select a high-quality online platform for learning a foreign language.
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The role of the school in the educational process
Teachers often complain that children do not want to learn at all. They are restless, self-willed, often hyperactive, and parents are unwilling or unable to influence their offspring.
In the modern education system, the teacher has ceased to be an educator and mentor; he is perceived only as a person called upon to explain the subject to the student. The role of the school as an instrument of pedagogical influence has been practically leveled; mothers and fathers themselves are largely to blame for this, zealously protecting children from punishment and criticism from teachers. Only the parent meeting can clarify the scope of what is permitted. Both the class teacher and other teachers will tell you how to help your child study well, because they see all the children in action and notice their mistakes and shortcomings.
No matter how much parents complain about school, their child’s poor grades are most likely his own fault. Of course, it is, alas, impossible to completely exclude the teacher’s unfair and biased attitude towards the student, but in the vast majority of cases, teachers are interested in ensuring that their student masters the material being studied to the maximum.
The main reasons for reluctance to learn
To understand how to help a child study well, it is necessary to understand why the student’s educational motivation has decreased, and parents increasingly began to hear the phrase “I don’t want to do my homework!” There can be many reasons for such stubbornness.
"Studying is boring"
You have to devote eleven whole years of your life to studying at school, and all these years bear little resemblance to a walk in an amusement park. An active and mobile child's consciousness perceives mandatory “servitude” in lessons that are uninteresting to him as real hard labor. Unfortunately, few subjects involve a creative approach that will allow the child to demonstrate his abilities.
In addition, a lot depends on the teacher. And if you are not as lucky with the teacher as you would like, it is up to the parents to find something entertaining and vital in school subjects.
“Learning is difficult”
Every year the school curriculum becomes more intense. Many parents complain that children are overloaded with information and “unnecessary” knowledge in lessons.
However, it is no coincidence that the modern curriculum is designed for this volume and is sufficiently absorbed by the average student.
Most often, difficulties arise due to the fact that the student missed an explanation of some material or systematically studied somehow, without completing homework. Maybe, after suffering from an illness, he misunderstood some topic or simply did not accept the teacher’s presentation of information. In this case, school classes become real torture for the child - after all, he simply does not understand what is being discussed in the lessons and what the teacher is trying to teach him.
Due to the fact that the subject becomes incomprehensible, the student is constantly in a state of stress. And this negatively affects both the child’s academic performance and self-esteem. Naturally, the result of such a situation is the student’s persistent dislike for this subject.
"It's too easy to learn"
No matter how strange it may sound, quite often problems with learning lie in the fact that some subjects are too easy for the student. Why does the child not want to study in this case? It’s just that the student loses interest in endlessly performing the same simple exercises. As a result, the child begins to ignore the object, justifying his behavior with the phrase “everything is clear.”
This situation is insidious not only because the desire to attend certain classes disappears. It is necessary to keep in mind that from the childish confidence “everything is clear and too simple here” to the unexpected “I don’t seem to understand anything at all” is literally one step.
Not an action to guide, but a food for thought
Finally, we will provide readers with the opinion of an experienced family psychologist, who has proven in practice the thoroughness and rationality of his approach to both children and their parents in solving a variety of problems, including school problems. His name is Mikhail Labkovsky.
“How to help a child study well?” is a question that Mikhail has to answer almost every day. In his opinion, the child just needs to stop being controlled and patronized, and given the opportunity to choose his own path, even if it is fundamentally wrong and harmful (from the point of view of adults).
Labkovsky believes that the main thing is the child’s happiness and self-realization, and not how he learns; that good grades are more often the desire of parents, but not the children themselves; that children should not be dutiful and obedient, because this indicates their depressed psyche. The best punishment, from his point of view, would be the temporary confiscation of gadgets - a phone, a tablet, a game box and other toys that carry practically nothing useful and are only a way of entertainment. He is also convinced that modern children should engage in more active group games.
How to help your child learn
How to help a younger student study?
We need to find out what causes the difficulties. This may be an individual trait (“it is not possible” to understand a specific subject), there may be problems in the relationship with the teacher, or there may be too much workload outside of school.
An age feature of primary school age is the great authority of the teacher. In the overwhelming majority of cases, the student’s performance depends on the personality of the teacher, and we are not talking about favorites, but about motivation. A good primary school teacher teaches a child to learn, knows how to motivate and praise. If your child’s relationship with the teacher is not going well, and their academic performance suffers as a result, you should contact a school psychologist - he will help them find a common language.
If difficulties arise with a specific subject, express your readiness to help your child at home: do homework together (this does not mean “for”), analyze incomprehensible topics. Sometimes children are embarrassed to ask questions to the teacher, and if this is the case in your case, you can approach the teacher with the child and ask him to explain an example again. The baby always needs your support.
It is worth paying special attention to the topic of grades: A’s and B’s are not a measure of “goodness.” Explain to your child that you will always love him and his grades can be corrected.
Parents often overload younger schoolchildren with clubs and sections. Of course, a developed child is the dream of every parent, but, you see, it’s not so important how well a child can play the piano if by the third grade he still hasn’t learned to write smoothly. Schooling at this age should be in first place, recreation in second, and only in third - dancing, drawing, football and swimming. If your child is tired, cannot concentrate in class, or does not have time to do homework, then give up one of the sections. You can always return to it if your performance rises to the desired level. The main task now is not to overload the student, because without the base of the elementary school in middle and high school, he simply will not be able to catch up with his classmates.
Help for teenagers
Even teenagers have problems with their studies. There are many reasons for this: hormonal changes in the body, a change in leading activity (from academic to intimate and personal communication with peers), the emergence of new interests (or the identification of one dominant one - for example, interest in the exact sciences), a high level of stress due to upcoming exams, etc. .d. You want to try everything, a new sensory and bodily experience appears, which is sometimes difficult to get used to and learn to live on. Most often, studies simply fade into the background, and communication and emotions come to the fore. In adolescence, it will no longer be possible to explain that you “need” to study—the teenager will give you a lot of arguments why you “don’t” study. The main thing now is motivation.
Teenage motivation is rarely based on the desire to go to a good university, because at 14 years old, college still seems too far away. In addition, the vast majority of teenagers still have no idea where to go and what to do, so you need to try to make the child interested in learning.
Many teenagers have interests in computer games, quests, books, films. Parents who have a trusting relationship with their children always know what their children are interested in at this stage of life. And any interest can be translated into a passion for science, the main thing is to make it applied. It is always important for teenagers to feel the result of their knowledge; they do not understand why they need to learn some formulas, but it is important to see how these formulas look in real life. Interested in computer games? You can study physics with computer science and create your own games.
Are you interested in cosmetics and personal care? Chemistry and biology are then best friends: you can study the composition of your favorite products and try to create your own at home. Has your teenager started his own blog? Yes, this is a direct path to a career as a journalist, and literature and the Russian language will help make the blog more interesting for readers.
Unfortunately, many graduate students worry too much about upcoming exams, and this long-term stressful situation prevents them from studying well. Alarming symptoms: disturbances in sleep, appetite, frequent depressive moods, low self-esteem, lack of confidence in oneself and in one’s strengths. What to do? Explain that exams are not the end of the world, that even if you fail, the world will not collapse. Any experience is important, including the experience of losing. Grades are just someone's opinion, the exam is just another stage. A lot depends on the results of the Unified State Exam, but not the whole life, help the teenager realize this. If anxiety becomes too high, it is better to seek help from a professional psychologist.
The main thing is to support the teenager’s initiative and transfer it into the school curriculum. After all, everything that surrounds us is the result of the activities of scientists, which means that your child can someday create something of his own. Help your teenager learn by keeping him interested.
Ekaterina Golovina
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