Life “What if it were your daughter?”: Is it possible to develop empathy

Report to the pedagogical council

Miscellaneous
: what is empathy, how to develop and manage it

Often we do not think about the psychological component of our behavior and emotions. Some of them seem absolutely normal to us. Thus, the ability to empathize with other people in a difficult situation may seem natural to others, but there is a scientific explanation for this fact, and, knowing what empathy is, you can better understand a person, his emotions and feelings.

Empathy - what is it?

Nowadays you can hear this word more and more often, but few people know what empathy is. This term does not mean a specific action when comprehending experiences - it is a complex set of gestures, words, feelings, emotions that speak about this action. Empathy is a person’s ability to understand the events happening to a person and, if necessary, empathize with them. Moreover, such actions occur absolutely consciously.

What is empathy in pedagogy?

It is worth noting that empathy in pedagogy is of no small importance. Teachers or educators are to some extent psychologists. It is important to establish a type of psychological interaction between the teacher and students that will suit both parties. In this case, empathy is the teacher’s ability to understand, and in some cases predict, the mental state and emotional state of the child.

This is important in a situation when the teacher sees the student’s talent and abilities and gives him more complex tasks, helps him feel more confident when answering at the board - asks leading questions, and at the appropriate moment can praise or scold the student. Naturally, one cannot cross the established boundaries between teacher and student - parents should deal with more serious issues of education, and excessive emotionality or empathy can harm the educational process

What benefits do empaths have?

Learning empathy - the ability to immerse yourself in the world of another person's emotions - is not so easy; for this you need to develop emotional flexibility and hypersensitivity.

But some professions simply cannot be mastered without acquiring empathic skills: psychologists, teachers, and doctors should be able to “read” the mood. And any other activity related to communication in one way or another implies the ability to adapt to your opponent.

You can’t do without empathy in business, where the key skill is the ability to influence the decisions of your partners and clients. After all, in order to be able to convince a person of something, it is necessary to first arouse his sympathy and trust.

Is empathy good or bad?

This feeling is characteristic of almost all living beings, and humans are no exception. The peculiarity is that everyone experiences a different level of the sensation in question. Someone can react sharply to any manifestation of another person’s feelings and empathize with him - this will be a high level of empathy, and for someone a kind word or deed without violent emotions and screams will be quite enough.

The first option can sometimes negatively affect the mental state of such an emotional interlocutor. Sometimes it is difficult for him to abstract himself from the experiences of another person - this can turn into a phobia or mental disorder, but in the absence of fixation on his feelings, people begin to understand people better. Lack of empathy can affect an individual's relationship with society. He will be called cold or callous, and sometimes he will be reproached for his inability to experience things with others.

Regardless of various situations and circumstances, the golden mean is important. In the modern world, with its bustle, frequent substitution of moral values ​​and the frantic pace of life, it is extremely important to remain an individual. The ability to empathize and not be indifferent will be appropriate in some cases, and its extreme manifestations can negatively affect the person himself

Useful tips

It is worth learning to manage yourself. Be able to close yourself off from negative emotions or filter their perception. It is necessary to clearly program what you can pass through yourself and what you cannot. An individual with a gift must find a reliable method to relieve others' bad emotions.

It is important to be able to replace empathy with non-empathic sympathy.

Demonstrate the ability to control emotions and show love, care and kindness in a more restrained form, after which a person will learn to feel the interlocutor, and not be sick of him.

Types of empathy

Knowing what empathy is, you can understand some of its features. So, there is an opinion to isolate the individual components of the word in question - sympathy and empathy. In the first case, this is a type of manifestation of one’s emotional reaction in response to a person’s experiences. Empathy is the psychological ability to take on the same emotions and sensations that another individual experiences.

Typically, expressions of empathy can be divided into three groups:

• cognitive – which includes intellectual processes – analogy or comparison;
• emotional – which consists in imitating some human reactions;
• predicative - the peculiarity of which is the ability to predict various reactions to what is happening. Empathy level

There are three main levels in the development of this feeling:

1. The first or low level of empathy is characterized by the individual’s concentration on himself and his worries, and a lack of interest in the lives of friends or colleagues. These people may find it difficult to carry on a conversation or take part in social activities.
2. The second level is the ability to empathize with other people at some moments, and sometimes to be indifferent to other people's worries or troubles. This group includes the public who rarely show their emotions. More often than not, she remains reasonable and calm.
3. The third level is often characteristic of emotional and receptive people; there are few of them, but they are able to perfectly understand and feel others. These are the best friends, sincere, capable of delving into the essence of the issue in any situation and finding the appropriate words and solutions, but sometimes they are based only on feelings

How to develop empathy?

There are some points that can develop a sense of empathy, or at least be useful for a deeper understanding of the issue. Among some tips, there are those that talk about studying the personality - its behavior, emotions, reactions to various factors or stimuli. What is empathy and how to develop it:

1. Listen to your interlocutor - this method helps to awaken emotions and better understand your partner.
2. Pay attention to the people around you in various situations and try to understand what they are thinking about, what professions they represent, and what territorial location they belong to.
3. Start conversations with people you don’t know: in a minibus with a fellow traveler, while traveling on a train or in the subway. Curiosity is one of the tools for developing empathy.
4. Put yourself in the other person's shoes to view issues from a different perspective. As a subject for adoption, one can turn to psychological films whose heroes are in a hopeless situation. Try to understand what to do in a given situation.
5. Develop skills in identifying your own emotions and feelings, and develop emotional memory. How to manage empathy ?

Often, a person who sees some of the qualities of an empath in himself finds it difficult to cope with them. Excessive worries about strangers and strong empathy are not always beneficial. In such cases, it is important to demonstrate the ability to manage this state - to let go of the situation, relax and be distracted by something else. Spend more time with loved ones or on hobbies. It may be worth thinking about your experiences and problems that are not related to other individuals. At the same time, we must not forget about our health.

Why is it necessary to learn empathy?

• It will be easier for you to be in any relationship - there will be fewer conflicts and difficult situations, fear and uncertainty will disappear.
• Communication with you in other people will begin to evoke extremely pleasant emotions - you will feel their gratitude for the psychological comfort.
• The overall impression of your image will change - you will be perceived as a pleasant, kind and charming person.
• By correctly understanding the emotional reactions of your interlocutor, you will be able to predict his actions.
• You will feel people's moods even without visual contact with them.
• By “tuning in” to a certain person, you can influence his emotional state - the interlocutor will begin to experience the same feelings as you.
• It will become easier for you to recover from communicating with emotionally difficult people; empathy skills will allow you to feel comfortable even with them.
• Depression will disappear and your overall emotional state will improve.

how to get rid of empathy?

Often the cause of a person’s anxiety is hypertrophied empathy. This problem can cause difficulties in communicating with people. You can get rid of it by controlling the feeling in question and your emotions, switching to your own concerns and hobbies. It is important to enjoy communicating with a person and find positive aspects in him. Empathy is the ability to sympathize with a person, to feel him, so it is worth thinking about the fact that completely getting rid of such a feeling can lead to rejection from society and contribute to self-isolation.

Sometimes you can look at a person and not see him, listen and not hear him. Learning to see and hear a loved one is a rather valuable skill. Would you like to understand someone else as if you were seeing the world through their eyes?

Often we are unaware of what the people with whom we interact are experiencing, what their inner world is like.

Empathy is the ability to recognize and experience what another person is feeling.

Empathy manifests itself as an emotional response to a change in the current state of the interlocutor. At the same time, the empathizer realizes that the feelings he experiences reflect the feelings of his communication partner. Definition of empathy

Empathy and sympathy are distinguished as separate forms of empathy:

• Empathy is identification with another and experiencing the emotional states that another person experiences.
• Sympathy is the social aspect of empathy, the expression of one’s state regarding the experiences of others.

A developed ability to empathize is a necessary professional quality for those whose work is directly related to people (executives, salespeople, personnel managers, teachers, psychologists, psychotherapists and others).

Empathy helps to determine the emotional states of another person, focusing on his facial expressions, gestures, paralinguistics, actions and life experiences.

Psychologists and psychotherapists use the technique of “empathic listening” - during which the psychologist understands the emotional state of another person and demonstrates it. The psychologist’s task is to make it clear to the patient that he is being listened to and to encourage him to more fully express his feelings.

The following types of empathy are distinguished:

• Emotional , based on the mechanisms of projection and imitation of the motor and affective reactions of another person.
• Cognitive – based on comparison, analogy, generalization and other intellectual processes.
• Predicative – associated with the ability to predict the emotional reactions of another person in specific situations.

The development of empathy is associated with the development of emotional intelligence. The main development of empathy occurs in childhood, and depends on upbringing in the family.

It is through empathy that a child penetrates into the world of feelings and experiences of others and learns the concept of the value of human life.

Needs for the well-being of other people are formed. Further, empathic ability increases, as a rule, with increasing life experience.

The formation of empathy is a purposeful process of developing moral motives, motivations in favor of another. Empathy takes part in the education of morality and ethics in the process of mental development and socialization.

Factors in the development of empathy

• Close and warm relationships within the family;
• Adults' empathy for other people;
• Kind attitude towards plants and animals. Parents should show their child at an early age that plants and animals are the same living organisms, and they, like people, can also be hurt (it hurts a cat if its tail is stepped on);
• Emotional reaction to sad events in the lives of others.

Everyone develops empathy to varying degrees.

The following levels of this ability are distinguished:

• High – increased sensitivity to the emotions of others. Such people are able to put themselves in the place of another person and, as it were, live part of his life, understand his thoughts. Show deep empathy for others.
• Normal - basically, a person is indifferent to people, but sometimes shows empathy. Strive to control your emotions and not show them.
• Low - poorly distinguishes the emotions of others, is not able to understand the experiences of others. There are problems with expressing feelings. Does not attach importance to emotions in life and suppresses them. Difficulty accepting other points of view.

What does lack of empathy mean? In fact, this means a tendency towards dehumanization of a person, insensitivity to the world around him.

Without emotional connections, the world turns into separate alienated objects with which he feels no connection. However, all people are socially connected, like atoms in a molecule.

How empathy helps in life

• Empathic subjects are friendly and sociable, they do not blame others for unfavorable events;
• Promotes mutual understanding in communication. This creates favorable relationships;
• Useful in art: it helps to convey the idea of ​​the work, to get used to the role of the actor, to feel the artistic creation;
• Forms a pleasant moral personality and is reflected in the real achievements of a person.

Keep your balance

But there are also disadvantages to developing empathy. Often people with high levels of empathy take other people's problems too personally. They have a hard time with conflicts, avoid them, or strive for compromise. They shy away from competition and have difficulty defending their interests.

Empaths are often burdened by feelings of guilt and fear, which can develop into panic attacks.

hypertrophied empathy so as not to harm yourself.

Develop some rules for yourself in relationships with people, learn to maintain an optimal balance of empathy in relationships:

• Limit and clearly distinguish between your and others’ personal space.
• Don't let yourself be manipulated. Understanding and sensitivity make you vulnerable. Stop attempts to put pressure on your pity or guilt.
• Don't try to be friends with everyone. If a person evokes negative emotions, it is better to simply distance yourself from this person rather than try to help him.
• Remember that everyone has the right to make a choice, whatever it may be.
• Don't interfere with another person's experiences unless you are asked to do so.

Advantages and disadvantages

Having learned what the word empathy means, some begin to try to master the abilities of the gift and develop it in their children. Often such people do not know how to use it correctly. This mental deficiency can cause discomfort to a person. To cope with various negative thoughts of strangers, you need to have a strong character and mind, so if an individual decides to develop empathy, it is worth knowing not only the advantages of the gift, but also the disadvantages.

The positive aspects include:

• good prospects for career growth;
• prompt assistance to relatives and friends;
• inadmissibility of being deceived;
• a chance to avoid quarrels - to extinguish conflicts.

The negative aspects include:

• rapid emotional burnout;
• tendency to worry;
• the likelihood of developing psychological disorders;
• in the sphere of human relations there is a risk of the situation developing according to the “one-goal game” plan;
• it happens that there is no mutual understanding on the part of others;
• increased sensitivity makes it very easy for strangers to harm the empath, and they themselves cannot resist this.

Develop Empathic Abilities

To get started, you need to take the following steps:

• learn to understand yourself;
• control your thoughts, actions and feelings;
• learn to understand the feelings and then the thoughts of other people;
• Realize that every person is interesting in their own right.

Mastering mindful empathy is not easy, but it is possible. It takes time to master the peculiarities of feeling someone else's emotional life. Developing empathy involves several levels.

Develop psychological observation

• it is important to learn to distinguish between gestures, facial expressions, and timbre of voice;
• notice any little things, they can tell a lot about a person;
• ask for views on certain things;
• practice often.

Gain Skills

• feel the mood and condition of others as if they were your own;
• try to temporarily “be in someone else’s shoes”;
• accept others for who they are.