How to become more self-confident: 10 proven ways

Psychology

November 26, 2020, 10:00

Rules for accepting yourself on the path to confidence
Simple Exercises to Boost Confidence
"Voice Commander"
"Armor"
“What is the strength?”

For many people, insecure behavior becomes the norm in everyday life. They suffer inconvenience and even humiliation from their superiors, other people, and even from their loved ones. In fact, such a person certainly has something to say in response. In his head, he often plays out scenarios of his victory over his offenders. But it’s impossible to say this out loud to your opponent.

It is easier for a person who lacks self-confidence to extinguish the conflict and endure it. It's a kind of defensive reaction.

But, unfortunately, such an attitude towards oneself most often leads to sad consequences . There is no advancement up the career ladder, and there is no mutual understanding with your partner in your personal life. To change your life for the better, you need to believe in yourself and your strength.

Self love

A full, happy life is impossible if you do not love and value yourself. Many people think that they are ugly, uninteresting, and don’t represent anything. Therefore, they cannot be loved, and all their actions and actions are useless and make no sense. Also, a manifestation of incorrect thinking can be called a situation when a person is convinced that his personal qualities are to blame for failures, and every victory is just the right combination of circumstances.

Before you understand how to cultivate self-confidence, ask yourself whether you like yourself, whether you consider your body beautiful, and your manner of communication attractive. As long as you criticize yourself and engage in self-flagellation, as long as everything falls out of your hands due to your insecurity, nothing will work out. You need to see not only the bad, but also the good sides of yourself. The more you paint yourself into a corner, the worse it will be. Accept yourself for who you are. Find something to love about you and develop that quality. This is the only way you can cope with uncertainty. It is your desire to see only failures and scold yourself for them that develops an inferiority complex in you. Anyone who considers himself worse than everyone else will never become a leader and will not be able to control his own destiny.

Purpose in life

One of the main rules for developing self-confidence is that you need to choose a goal for yourself. By thinking about it, planning how to achieve it, you can start something. If you don't see a goal in front of you, where should you go? Many people just go with the flow, living like everyone else. Their day passes rather inertly: work, store, home, sofa, TV, sleep, work. Every new day is similar to the previous one. Living in such a rhythm, it is impossible to achieve anything. Only something important, interesting, exciting, bringing emotions and positivity will allow you to break out of the vicious circle. When everything happens automatically, a person does not feel in his place, he simply lives the same days.

Are you wondering how to build self-confidence? Try to find yourself a hobby. Psychologists advise immediately discarding criticism and analysis. Think about what you would like to do. Don't think about whether it's rational or not. If you don't believe you can do something, don't give up anyway. The main thing is to try, to start.

You have nothing to lose. If you have a lot of doubts, just brush them aside. The idea may not work out the first time, but that's okay. Try again, change your activities, look not for what will bring you income or be interesting to those around you, but for what you will like. You need to find something that will captivate you, interest you, and bring positive emotions.

Factors of influence

Increasing self-confidence is sometimes necessary if a person feels lost and worthless. Most often, this is influenced by bad work or an unworthy environment. In the first case, a person loses interest in life and ceases to feel like a person, because his actions bring neither pleasure nor benefit.

Such an individual not only has a routine, low-paid, unpromising and very uninteresting job, but also bosses and colleagues who exert psychological pressure. The more disappointed a person is in what he does, the lower his self-confidence. As a result, he begins to be even more harassed at work, and those around him (even family members) lose respect for him.

When a person is confident and full of strength, he is admired and his opinion is taken into account. Otherwise, society tries to isolate the weak element, feeling its condition on an intuitive level. These are reflexes.

In the second case, a person surrounds himself with obviously insincere people who, under a flattering mask, slowly generate seeds of doubt in him. They can be driven by revenge, envy and other base feelings. Sooner or later their behavior produces results. A person begins to doubt himself and his own strengths. Then the question arises of how to become a person again.

Addressing exposure at work

If self-esteem and self-confidence have suffered due to work, then the solution to the problem is simple and complex at the same time. Simple, because the workplace (and sometimes the type of activity) needs to be changed. The difficulty of this path is that, most likely, you will have to strengthen your knowledge and skills or learn something new, something that will really interest and captivate you. Achieving success in education and career, you will be able to believe in yourself and find your path. Then you will not worry about how to develop self-confidence, because you will feel the changes within yourself.

How self-esteem affects life

The definition of self-esteem refers to an individual’s ideas about himself as a person. This includes an assessment of one’s character traits, behavior, functioning in society, the concept of one’s importance, strengths and weaknesses.

Important! The measure of self-esteem (self-confidence) is strictly individual and depends on what is meaningful for a person in life and what is not.

The formation of self-esteem occurs simultaneously with the development of awareness from childhood, childhood and adolescence. The child, with the support of his parents, as the first people around him, receives the necessary guidelines. The task of parents is to stimulate the child’s abilities, celebrate his successes, emphasize his strengths and help him cope with his shortcomings. This is important because subsequently, throughout life, people around him will try to influence a person’s level of self-esteem.

Attention! Properly placed faith in oneself, one’s strengths and capabilities is immune from public opinion. No third-party statements or assessments can change the level of self-confidence of a mentally healthy and prepared person.

There are three degrees of confidence, namely:

Environment

If the problem is in the environment, then it is necessary to reconsider the circle of trusted persons. Pay attention to who, after communicating with you, you feel awkward and lose ground. Think about why this happens. Perhaps your interlocutor is not to blame. It's just your personal reaction to his success that spoils your mood. But if you notice that he is specifically trying to prick you, to show you that you are somehow worse than him, then do you need him? What is the use of such friendship. The main secret of how to become an individual is to have your own opinion and not succumb to provocations from the outside. It is important that you decide for yourself how to live, what to do.

Even if your actions lead to mistakes without outside advice, this will be your personal experience, on the basis of which the facets of your personality are formed.

Inaction kills and eats us from the inside, and blindly following other people's advice allows us to avoid responsibility. After all, if the action is wrong, you can always blame the one who advised it. Developing self-confidence is serious work, including taking responsibility for each of your actions. Only our own initiative, opinion, choice and actions make us individuals.

How to develop self-confidence

“One of the greatest discoveries that a man makes, one of the greatest surprises for him, is to discover that he is able to do what he fearfully thought was beyond his strength.” (G. Ford)

Every person is capable of changing as much as he is ready for it. And the result of any transformation usually depends on how confident we are in ourselves.

Self-confidence is the ability to accept and trust yourself completely . Accepting yourself fully means being aware of your growth areas and your strengths at the same time. After all, relying on your strengths, you can achieve any success, acquire and improve any skills.

The problem most often lies in the fact that we talk a lot and colorfully about our shortcomings, but somehow not so much about our abilities and talents...

I literally come across this every day in coaching and trainings - a simple question about what worked “excellently” causes almost stupor, and instead the participants begin to talk about what mistakes they made...

As a result, focusing on failure makes the next step more difficult . After all, the experience of achievement and success is not formed. And failures do not encourage us to find ourselves in the uncomfortable position of embarrassment again and again.

Situations of self-doubt are often associated with fears.

“How will I be perceived? What will they think of me? What happens if…?"

And it is possible to overcome these fears only by relying on yourself, on your past experience of achievements and victories. Therefore, any work with success (and any work with self-confidence) begins with accepting yourself and your achievements.

It is love, respect and warmth for ourselves that help us cope with situations where we are unsure. In part, this happens because we allow ourselves to “be imperfect” and are willing to give ourselves a second chance.

Self-confidence is a personality trait. And for each of us it is developed to varying degrees. At the same time, everyone is capable of developing self-confidence. Under one important condition - when he understands why he needs it .

Man is designed in such a way that he does not do anything for nothing. After all, no one wants to make serious efforts for the sake of vague promises of a better future. Therefore, we usually begin to act when we are faced with a serious problem, a crisis, or a passionate, acute desire to change something in our lives.

If we talk about self-confidence, then people are usually much more accustomed and comfortable to “live in a rut”, to do “as smart people say.” It is often easier to compromise, to give up something really important, than to insist on your own.

“Many people are driven by a philosophy of service to others, trying to avoid responsibility for changing their lives,” writes Robert Anthony in The Secrets of Self-Confidence.

As a practical psychologist, I can say that people come to me with a request to develop self-confidence when this quality becomes vital .

What reasons often motivate people to think about developing self-confidence?

For example, in a leadership position it is important to defend your opinion, due to the type of work you do, you need to speak a lot in front of an audience, you cannot meet and start a conversation with a girl/boyfriend, relationships with significant people do not work out, etc.

What is self-confidence?

What can a confident person do? Here are just some options

Makes decisions in his own life;
knows how to insist on his own in a discussion;
boldly expresses his opinion and gives arguments in support of it;
knows how to resolve conflicts and negotiate with others;
knows how to defend their interests in disputes, negotiations, and communication;
knows how to cope with the fear of speaking in front of an audience;
can meet/communicate with a stranger and feels comfortable;
knows how to say “no” in time, while maintaining a good relationship with the one he refuses.

How to develop self-confidence, what needs to be done for this?

Self-confidence includes: internal state + behavioral characteristics.

The internal state may include:

A state of comfort when performing new actions,
the ability to rely on your inner self
(including your values, beliefs),
the ability to defend one’s boundaries when interacting with other people
(to know and understand one’s internal needs),
the ability to regulate one’s internal state
(for example, reduce the level of anxiety when speaking in public).

Behavioral features include:

The ability to say “no”;
the ability to express your needs when communicating with other people;
the ability to argue your point of view and negotiate with other people;
specific skills for a specific activity (eg, public speaking, networking).

From this point of view, work on developing confidence is usually built with two components at once - with an internal sense of self and with some specific skills.

Working with a condition begins with awareness of the advantages and benefits that the current situation gives a person. After all, if some situation does not seem very comfortable or right, but a person remains in it, it means that he needs it for something.

Practice shows that we are usually well aware of why we need changes in life, and rarely realize why old problems hold us back.

As a result, we may talk a lot about how we are going to lose weight, quit smoking, get rich, or develop self-confidence - but in reality nothing changes in life.

The answer to this paradox is simple - we are only able to realize consistent intentions . Any internal contradiction between the desire for change and unconscious resistance leads to the fact that no changes occur.

If you are reading this article now, it means that the topic of developing self-confidence somehow attracts you. Perhaps you want to feel more confident. Then answer yourself honestly:

What have you done in the last month to improve your self-confidence?
What specific steps have you taken and what changes have occurred in your life?

If the answer is no, it is important to understand what is keeping you in your current state. Why do you prefer to “want” but not act.

If you need help, you can contact a professional coach or psychologist who will help you identify internal barriers and so-called “secondary benefits” that prevent you from moving towards your goal. You can also learn the basic skills of working with metaphorical associative maps and in this way help yourself move in the chosen direction.

As a first step to developing self-confidence, I propose a simple algorithm.

Follow 4 steps in sequence, be honest with yourself.

Write answers to 2 questions:
What is self-confidence for you?
How will you notice that you have become a more confident person?
Give at least 5-7 possible answers.
Find 10 reasons why it is important for you to be confident.
What good changes in life will this lead you to?
Find 10 reasons why you are comfortable staying in your current state and being unsure of yourself. What “benefits” do you get without changing anything ?
Make a plan for developing self-confidence for the next 30 days - what action will you perform every day, and how will it bring you closer to the result.

The most difficult questions are usually pp. 3 and 4.

So, point 3 - what benefits can there be from maintaining self-doubt?

Let me give you one example from practical work with a client.

At one of the sessions with a client, we discussed the topic of confidence in detail. And they determined that confidence is when the client makes decisions himself, without the advice of other people.

The obvious question is - what prevents an intelligent adult and strong person from making independent decisions in his life? Starting from what to wear to a business meeting, and ending with questions about where to go on vacation.

As a result of working with metaphorical associative maps, 2 things became clear:

When he receives advice and/or decisions from his loved ones, he feels their concern for him, feels that he is important to them;
in complex matters, when a decision is made instead of him, he is not responsible for the consequences of this decision.

Obviously, as long as shifting decisions to other people tells the client that he is loved, that he is cared for, and as long as he can avoid the unpleasant consequences of responsibility, developing confidence in this particular aspect is useless.

The benefit of the current state is much greater than the benefit of change.

But once these two things are mastered, acquiring the skill of making decisions and giving responsibility to others will simply be a matter of technique.

As a result, we worked on understanding how loved ones can show care for him in addition to making decisions and advice “every day,” and how he can feel their love and support in other ways.

And on the second point, we figured out what decisions in the past led to undesirable consequences, how we can prevent such consequences in the future, and how we can share responsibility.

The result of the meetings was the fact that the client really began to rely more on himself and make decisions on his own.

Of course, the internal “benefits of uncertainty” are individual for each person. And when we begin to realize them, we can already decide what to do: leave everything as it is, or change something in our life.

An action plan for developing self-confidence usually includes both working with the internal state, identifying personal characteristics, developing self-reliance and self-acceptance, and developing the skills necessary in specific situations.

Moreover, developing skills is a simpler part of internal work on oneself.

Accepting yourself is much more difficult, and it is important to understand that this is not a one-day process.

Unfortunately, we are not accustomed to treating ourselves with love, respect and warmth. Very often I encounter that people are immediately ready to name their shortcomings, their mistakes and failures. But the question about their talents and abilities causes bewilderment, pause, and sometimes shock.

We rarely think about what is our uniqueness in the world, what is our value and purpose . And the job of a psychologist in consultation, a coach in a session or a trainer is precisely to help a person see his strengths and learn to rely on them.

When we receive such support, we can move on and develop new qualities and skills. This includes developing self-confidence.

Robert Anthony writes about the art of self-acceptance: “Understanding your true worth as a person is another critical factor in gaining self-confidence... Positive self-esteem is not just an intellectual acceptance of your talents or achievements. This is personal agreement with yourself.”

Self-confidence is closely related to self-esteem, the ability to rely on oneself and take responsibility for one's life. Can this be learned? Definitely - Yes!

“A man who wants to move a mountain begins by moving small stones ,” says an old Chinese proverb.

Start by recognizing who you are, what qualities and abilities you have right now. How do these qualities help you? What are your achievements and successes to date?
Formulate what you would like to be and how this will help you improve your life. How can what you already have help you?
Look for opportunities to develop desirable qualities and skills.
Take action!

Human intention and action have the power to transform the world!

And absolutely - you can transform yourself...

Clear plan

If you feel unsure of yourself, it means you need to change something urgently. If you don't believe in your own strengths, then nothing will work out. To go somewhere, you need to know the direction. Therefore, you need to come up with a clear plan. When you understand what you want to do, you need to think about ways to realize your desires and eliminate all the “buts”. Believe me, there may be a lot of them along the way. Any new endeavor requires willpower, money, time and much more. Getting out of the zone of everyday life and familiar routine is very difficult. Many fears and doubts may arise. Your psyche itself will come up with excuses why you don’t need to change anything.

Fight your doubts or ignore them. Just take it and do it. The road will be mastered by those who walk, so start taking action. Otherwise, nothing will work. It's much easier to leave everything unchanged. But psychological self-confidence will not appear by itself; it needs to be developed. Clear goals and achieving them will help you believe in your own strength. Even if something doesn’t work out, you shouldn’t engage in self-criticism and self-flagellation, try again and again until it starts to work out. Over time, you will see how you have begun to change without noticing it.

How to develop self-confidence (internal)

1. As a first exercise in building self-confidence, find someone you admire. This should be a standard of confidence for you and preferably of the same gender. Maybe it will be a character from a book or a movie, perhaps your relative, friend or acquaintance, the main thing is your perception of this person as confident. He or she must be presented as vividly as possible and get used to his or her role. Do this exercise several times throughout the day and you will feel your self-confidence increase.

2. You can also build self-confidence.

, imagining yourself absolutely confident, as if you had already trained confidence, as if the result had already been achieved by you. Project this image somewhere in the room. Imagine absolutely exactly how you look, how you move and other details. And get used to your image. Step into this image. Put it on yourself, like a suit, and become this image yourself.

3. There is definitely an animal nature in every person. Our emotions, our

behavior, our body is to a large extent closer to animals than we can even imagine. To build self-confidence

we can approach this animal nature when the situation demands it and win. Imagine the animal that represents strength and confidence for you and stand with it for a while.

4. I recently learned this technique for building self-confidence. It is similar to the previous 3 techniques, but this time you get used not to a person or an animal, but to a natural element. To do this, you can imagine yourself as a storm, hurricane or volcanic eruption and absorb the power of any element!

Internal needs and resources

There is one important point in how to develop determination and confidence. As stated above, action is needed. When choosing which direction to move in, you should consider what you need. There is no need to choose those areas that are considered prestigious, take on the work of your acquaintances and friends, or remember old hobbies that once did not bring you satisfaction.

You need to consider your own resources. A person with poor health will not become an Olympic champion. Anyone who cannot imagine will not become a good writer. You must feel what interests you, what you have the ability to do, what brings you pleasure, what knowledge you would like to gain. In this matter, rely only on yourself and your inner feelings. No one else can answer the question of who you really are.

How to spot low self-esteem

How to increase self-esteem for a child - what affects self-confidence

Before you learn how to increase self-confidence, you need to decide on its level. The following are signs of low self-esteem:

you constantly want to feel sorry for yourself, replaying your life’s failures in your head and experiencing a feeling of hopelessness;
regularly comparing oneself with other people and stating the “fact” of their “superiority”;
unconscious selection of one’s own environment, which obviously has a bad attitude towards a person;
fear of being disgraced and constant concern about the opinions of others about the qualities of the individual;
internal conflicts: fear of independent action, rejection of criticism (vulnerability); increased feelings of anxiety, dislike for oneself and disbelief that someone could love someone like that;
external manifestations: constrained movements, stooped figure, taking “closed poses”, the desire to be invisible.

For your information. For people with low self-esteem, difficult situations cause psychosomatic symptoms: redness of the skin, sweating, trembling and increased heart rate. Interpersonal relationships suffer due to the fear of starting relationships with the opposite sex or making new acquaintances.

Answering the following questions will help determine your level of self-confidence:

Do unnecessary worries often arise;
How often does the desire to gain approval from friends appear;
what is the frequency of fear of looking stupid;
Do you often feel afraid for your future?
does it always seem that your own appearance is worse than that of others;
the frequency of feelings of misunderstanding on the part of others;
How often do you feel the inability to communicate with other people?
Does stiffness always manifest itself?
constant anticipation of personal troubles;
the emergence of a feeling that people are waiting for something more than can be done;
anxiety about how others treat you;
the constant feeling that people are only talking about you and discussing you behind your back;
there is no one to whom you can express your thoughts and experiences;
constant feeling of danger;
no one is interested in your successes and achievements.

You need to answer the questions using the following answers corresponding to the points:

very often – 4;
often – 3;
sometimes – 2;
rarely – 1;
never – 0.

Attention! Level of self-esteem according to the number of points: 10 or less - overestimated, from 11 to 29 - objective, above 29 - low.

The main thing when taking such tests is to be honest with yourself. Answer as it really is, and not as it should be.

Low self-esteem

External needs and resources

Starting something new always requires sacrifice. This could be time, money, some interests (perhaps, for the sake of new achievements, you will have to give up the sofa and TV, which we wrote about above). Everyone can find many excuses so as not to lose what they are used to. Learn to sacrifice something. Perhaps this spending will ultimately bring you more pleasure and joy than you expected. It's important to try. This is the main answer to the question of how to build self-confidence. A psychologist's advice may be different, but their goal is the same: you should feel like a self-sufficient person, realize your strength, believe that the world around you is beginning to change for the better if you put effort into it.

Support

A person is designed in such a way that he definitely needs support and attention. While your actions and successes are hidden behind seven locks, no one knows anything about them. For others they do not exist. When you start to succeed, be sure to share your successes with those who can be sincerely happy for you. If you start boasting in front of envious people and those who previously tried to surpass you, you will only get negative things. After all, they will try their best to show you that you are still unworthy and weak. Value yourself and do not allow those who do not deserve it into your soul.

Appearance

Another secret to building self-confidence in a woman is her attractiveness. Only by feeling beautiful can she find spiritual harmony and believe in her own strength. Try experimenting with hairstyle, wardrobe, and makeup. Do everything so that a real queen looks at you from the mirror.

Knowing that you look great can take over the world. Even when going to the nearest store to buy bread, take off simple household items and get yourself in order. At first it will be difficult and uncomfortable, but over time you will get used to it. This way you will always be sure that you are irresistible. Psychologists say that this is how female psychology works. You can be lazy and choose the most convenient paths, but this will not give you confidence. If you set a goal to become irresistible, achieve it.

Let's recognize the causes of self-doubt

In order to overcome self-doubt, you need to understand yourself and find out the reasons for this condition. Based on them, you will be able to overcome internal fears and worries, and regain healthy self-esteem.

The main reasons for self-doubt:

Unhappy childhood. In childhood and adolescence, relationships with parents play a particularly important role. If a child does not receive the care, attention, and care he needs from his parents or guardians, this often becomes the cause of self-doubt at an older age.
Poor peer influence. At school, children often face bullying, humiliation, and ridicule. This greatly traumatizes their psyche and negatively affects their success in the future.
Injury. People who have experienced physical, emotional, and sexual violence tend to believe that they are not worthy of love, respect, and care. This prevents you from leading a full life and causes low self-esteem.
Not accepting your body. Teenagers are especially prone to this. With free access to the Internet, children are often exposed to naked bodies. As the child grows up, secondary sexual characteristics begin to appear, and they are faced with the fact that their body does not look the same as in the picture. This leads to feelings of unattractiveness, inferiority, and lack of self-confidence.
Unrealistic goals. It is important to understand that it is impossible to be the best at everything. When we set too many goals for ourselves or make them too difficult, if we fail, it greatly affects our self-esteem. It is worth adequately assessing your capabilities.
Negative experience. Previous bad experiences in relationships or work can affect a person’s life. Often people close themselves off, limit themselves from society, suffer from depression, anxiety, and lack of self-confidence.

How to overcome embarrassment and uncertainty

Shyness is a feeling of discomfort that a person may feel in unusual situations or among unfamiliar people. But sometimes embarrassment and self-doubt go beyond any limits and interfere with working, communicating with people, and being socially active. In this case, it is worth working on yourself, developing self-confidence. There are several ways to do this:

Interact. Confidence in communication comes with experience and practice. If you isolate yourself from society, it increases your embarrassment when you have to contact people. Communicate more, develop this skill, and you will get rid of stiffness and shyness.
Get out of your comfort zone. Take up a sport that is unusual for you, try to learn new skills. By practicing unfamiliar tasks, you will learn to overcome the fear of the unknown, learn to cope with anxiety and worry.
Practice nonverbal skills. A person who is insecure is identified by a stooped back and a reluctance to make eye contact. Walk with your head held high, when communicating with people, do not be afraid to look your interlocutor in the eyes, shake hands firmly. This will help overcome shyness and increase self-esteem.

How to overcome uncertainty and fear in communication

Communication is a skill, just like riding a bike, cross-stitching, or dancing. At first you take timid steps, which with experience gain speed and professionalism.

In order to gain confidence in communication, you need to talk to real people. Go outside, don’t waste your life on the virtual world and social networks. Allow yourself to talk to a stranger in a store, gym, library. Over time, the fear of starting a conversation will be replaced by calmness and self-confidence.

How to overcome fear and uncertainty when driving

How to increase self-confidence when driving a car? Get behind the wheel more often! With experience, anxiety and worry disappear, and all complex maneuvers become mechanical movements that do not cause fear. Some more practical tips:

Don't be alone. For the first few weeks or even months, take short trips with a passenger. This passenger does not have to be an ace at driving, he can simply be a person with whom you feel calm and at ease.
Daylight hours only. Until you gain enough experience, try not to travel in the evening or at night. At this time, it is more difficult to navigate the situation on the road, which can aggravate your fears.
Practice on the highway. Once you've learned how to drive in the city, it's time to practice driving on the highway. A large number of traffic lanes and speed limits for an inexperienced driver can become another challenge for which you need to be prepared.
Hire an instructor. If it is very difficult, you should seek help from an instructor. Driving in a training vehicle with the support of an experienced driver will definitely help you get rid of additional stress.

Often people are faced with uncertainty about driving a car after an accident. Don't forget that you are not the only road user. And the situation on the road depends not only on you. You should not perceive car damage as your own incompetence. This can happen to even the most experienced driver.

How to overcome self-doubt at work

It is easier for a self-confident employee to earn the commitment of his superiors, colleagues, clients, and to receive a promotion or bonus. To do this, you need to understand your value, constantly develop, and be a professional in your field. What to do for this:

Ask questions. Feel free to ask colleagues for advice and share their experiences. This will help you gather valuable information for your own professional growth.
Difficult goals. There is nothing better than the feeling of conquering great heights. Always set interesting goals for yourself, try to make them more difficult. When you acquire them, you become more confident in your abilities. Be careful: you should set difficult, but not achievable goals. Adequately assess your capabilities.
Stop comparing. Your colleagues' work is different from yours. They have other tasks and goals. You should not perceive the successes of other employees as your own failures. Do your work efficiently without comparing yourself to your colleagues.