Content
- Meaning of the phrase
- Learn to let go
Hello dear readers. Sometimes we suffer, worry, suffer and try to do something even when nothing depends on us. If you have ever found yourself in some kind of unpleasant situation, then you probably know what this feeling is when the only desire is not to think, to forget, to switch to something else. This is exactly what will be discussed in my article today.
What does it mean to let go of a situation and how to do it, is it possible when it comes to important areas of life for a person - love or career, as well as many interesting facts from the world of psychology.
What is a vicious circle and how does it appear?
On a deeper level, in Buddhism it is called the Wheel of Samsara (wheel of fate). When a person’s soul walks from incarnation to incarnation in a vicious circle, living through the same mistakes, character traits and qualities in different variations.
At the level of this incarnation, action takes place through your thoughts and understandings. To get out of the wheel of Samsara, you need to realize your mistakes and draw conclusions.
And it doesn’t matter in what situations you realize the error of your reactions, big, grandiose or very small. The effect for the wheel of samsara will be the same. Awareness and forgiveness break the circle of Samsara. A completed lesson no longer requires repetition and reinforcement. And you move to the next level or the next grade of school, the exam is passed.
From my life.
So, when I left the kindergarten, I began to look for another kindergarten. I didn't want to go to school to work. (I'm an elementary school teacher).
I went to kindergartens, chose good kindergartens, and first went and talked to teachers during walks. In the first kindergarten, I got the impression that they were telling me about my old place of work. I thought it was an accident. I went to the second, the same thing, the third... I must say that I know how to ask questions and win over what everyone says...
I walked and listened... And I began to have the feeling that I was coming to the same place, that everything was the same everywhere. And I’ll just exchange the awl for soap...
Then I made the decision: “Stop! Why do I need this? Repeat the situation with other people? And I decided not to go to official work.
And when I started studying bioenergy, I learned one BIG secret
- VKontakte
It concerned precisely the repetition of the situation. I remembered him for the rest of my life. And I tell everyone
Get ready to listen and hear!
Meaning of the phrase
What does it mean to let go? There are certain episodes in life on which a person becomes fixated. He begins to constantly think about what happened, predict various scenarios, plan his actions, and discuss what is happening with friends. His whole life is built around a certain event.
Letting go of this situation means not thinking about it for a while, letting it take its course and just observing what is happening.
Letting go is very helpful for many reasons. The main one is that reality is almost always different from fantasy. No matter how confident a person is, everything in life will happen in a unique way, in a different way, no one will take your plans into account.
It is impossible to consider the situation from all sides and prepare for it 100%, and therefore there is a risk of disappointment if you are more likely to be classified as an optimistic person. You also won’t envy pessimists who don’t know how to let go of a situation.
Imagine a simple example. The girl began dating a man whom she had dreamed of for a very long time. She is constantly nervous that he will leave her and suffers. The woman tries to do everything to prevent a breakup from happening and essentially behaves as if her man has already told her that he wants to break up.
Even if her fears are ever justified, the girl’s suffering after this fact will last a maximum of a month, but the fear that accompanies her while she is in a relationship prolongs this condition for a longer period.
Technology and psychology
You need to analyze yourself, your feelings, the problem you are struggling to solve. If possible, break down the situation and understand what is troubling about it, what aspects cause the greatest concern. Moreover, it doesn’t matter how old the problem is, if it is not solved, then the person will mentally return to it again and again, looking for a way out, analyzing, trying to understand. But in such a situation it is difficult to build a vector into the future. Therefore, it is important to let go of some problems. The main thing is not to delay the decision, otherwise it will be even more difficult later. And in the present, in ordinary life, the burden of problems only prevents you from enjoying happiness and enjoying life.
In order to change your life for the better, you don’t need much: a positive attitude, strong intentions, an understanding of your goal.
Sometimes a person cannot let go of a situation because he is too dependent on external factors, problems depress him, and he cannot forgive himself for the mistakes he has made, not understanding that these mistakes constitute our life experience. It only takes a little effort to understand this. Let go of the past and turn towards a bright future.
Giving up what you want
How does this happen? And most importantly - why? The answer to the second question is very simple - because what the Universe gives does not meet your expectations, that is, it does not look like what you imagined and what you expect. I’ll give you an example of increasing income, which I’ve already cited more than once in my articles, it’s very
indicative. A person wants to receive more money and asks the Universe to provide him with a doubling of his monthly income. What does he imagine?
Most likely, he will be promoted according to the increase in salary. This is exactly what he is waiting for. That is, he draws in his imagination a certain scenario for the fulfillment of his desire and considers everything that corresponds to it to be good luck, and everything that goes beyond its scope (or, in principle, does not fit into it) is recorded as a bad event. But the Universe may have prepared a completely different way to achieve what this person wants.
By the way, we should remember that the Universe always gives us a little more and a little better (or maybe not a little!) than we ask for. You just need to accept it. But the ways to achieve the desired result may not be the same as we imagine, operating only with the parameters visible to us. And just imagine, instead of being promoted, a person is fired from his job. According to the plan of the Universe, in a few days he will find himself a new job, where the salary will be exactly what he asked for in his request. BUT!
This can only happen if the person calmly accepts his dismissal, signaling to the Universe: “Yes, I trust you and know that you will fulfill my desire, I still want this and am ready to move on.” And instead of “sprinkling ashes on your head” and complaining about the injustice of the world, you will be determined to move on. Then events will continue to develop quickly and easily, ultimately leading to the fulfillment of desire, that is, to an increase in income, which is what the person ordered.
But most often, everything happens according to a different scenario - non-acceptance of the situation, perceived by the Universe as a refusal of one’s desire, and as a result - the very increase in income that should have occurred “freezes” for an indefinite time or forever, if a person decides in connection with all these events that it “will never happen” to him.
Well, do you remember if something similar happened to you? Surely it happened. Maybe not on such a scale and not in such serious situations as changing jobs, but it happened. Now you know that with such a negative reaction to current events, you postpone getting what you want or even “cancel the order.”
How to be in the here and now? Practice.
Chatso they say, “be here and now.” Above I explained the danger of being in the past or future.
But how to bring yourself back to the present? How to control where your thoughts are now?
There is a very simple practice that helps 100%!
Ask yourself regularly: “what do I see, what do I hear, what do I feel” and list: “I see a house, a book, a window, a car (whatever you are seeing at the moment). I hear the sound of rain, a passing car, a dog barking, etc. what are you hearing now? I feel the breeze, it’s uncomfortable for me to sit, it’s warm on the left side, etc.”
If you are completely lost in time, then set a reminder on your phone. Let it bring you back to the present every 15 minutes.
I don't want and can't let her go
It's been about 6 years since we've known each other, and more than 3 years since we've been married. For 2 years while I was studying at the university, we had a complete idyll. I was sent to work in another area, and I took her with me, and 9 months later we got married. From the very beginning, even from university, we quickly accepted each other’s wishes, we did not have a period of “everyday life”, like many others, there were no scandals, etc. It all started 2.5-3 years after we met. I somehow lost interest in her sexually. Unpleasant conversations began. Moreover, I didn’t go “to the left”, I didn’t even look at other girls. It’s just that somehow sex began to take up less and less space in my life.
I wanted to give everything to her, all of myself, all my strength and means. But she needed sex, and I couldn’t give it (and it’s not about potency). We tried to make changes in our sex life, but they were temporary. I quit my job and we moved to her hometown, bought an apartment, and got new jobs. But the change of location only briefly changed the situation for the better. In January 2009, after another conversation, I lost my temper and told her that I was “tired of sex.” That same evening she went to stay with her sister for a week. After returning, we made up and cried. But already at the end of February everything came to a critical point, and she slept with someone else.
I forgave her (even though she didn’t ask for forgiveness), but I thought I was going crazy, a voice inside screamed “you should do the same.” 2 weeks later I also slept with someone else. The world collapsed for me after that night. Suddenly I felt like I was dead and nothing else mattered except her. We talked and realized that it wouldn’t be the same as before, and we agreed to an open relationship. They often did not spend the night at home. But when we spent the night, everything suddenly became so clear, both understanding and attitude. Sex exploded with new colors, I felt how much I love her. And I want her every day. We soon went to Egypt, where we became even closer. I lost my sense of ownership; I didn’t hold her.
On May 2 we returned, on the 3rd she went to someone else for the night. And on May 7 she said that she didn’t want this to continue, she didn’t want to torment me, but she didn’t want to be with me, she said that she didn’t know what love was, that we needed to break up. And although I understand her, I see feelings for me in her eyes. But I love her more than life itself and cannot let her go, but I also have no right to hold her. I feel like we can make things right and love each other for who we are, but she said she doesn't want that.
What should I do? I don't want and can't let her go. I wish her happiness with whoever she is, but I still want to be with her.
Eugene
Similar
How to stop berating yourself for past mistakes?
- VKontakte
- VKontakte
- VKontakte
- VKontakte
I tell you how to live them and how to deal with them in the video, answering a question from my reader.
Turn it on and start using it.
And I have already received gratitude from the woman who asked this question.
“Svetlana, good evening. I regret that I couldn’t leave my review under the video, something didn’t work. Here I express my sincere gratitude to you for the video. I looked it over several times and immediately, involuntarily, began to do what you recommended. Yes, I understand everything, and the consequences too. Thank you for responding so quickly, and also for your smile at the end of the video. Looking forward to the next videos. Best regards, Larisa.”
- Accept that in this situation you acted based on your knowledge and understanding. An hour later you could have acted differently. But this was already a different moment in time, a different you. And therefore, you did everything possible in your understanding, based on the best options visible to you.
- Tell yourself that you approve of yourself. In any situation, in what happened, what happened - “I approve of myself.” Remember, you acted there as the only best option possible. Eating yourself for making a mistake will not do anything good for your life, health, relationships and money.
- Control yourself where you are with your thoughts - in the present, past or future. When you fly into the past with your thoughts and decide a situation that cannot be changed, you throw energy, strength and health into the past. When your thoughts are in the future, in a situation that has already been resolved and everything is great, then you again de-energize yourself in the present and live in the future. You are throwing energy into the future. In the present, missing out on opportunities and chances, money, relationships, health.
