OWN PEOPLE: Strategies for creating a new social circle

How to expand your social circle? Communicate with people as often as possible and overcome communication barriers. Why is it important? Social interaction is the exchange of experience, knowledge, impressions, opinions, emotions, feelings. It is also a source of mutual assistance and mutual assistance, useful connections that help a person realize himself in life and achieve success. A small (narrow) social circle blocks the development of personality - a person marks time.

Reasons for people's very narrow social circles

Every person has a need for communication, but not everyone can fully satisfy it. Why is this happening? It's all because of limiting beliefs and stereotypes.

Beliefs that limit communication

Examples of common destructive beliefs that prevent you from talking to a stranger:

  • “They will push me away, they will refuse me, they will not understand me”;
  • “I can’t carry on a conversation, I’m boring”;
  • “I will look intrusive/stupid”;
  • “They will beat me up (they will show aggression in another way) if I look a stranger in the eyes and smile at him”;
  • “No one is interested in my problems, opinions, feelings”;
  • “I’m scary and unattractive - people are afraid of me, they find it unpleasant to communicate with me”;
  • “I look unkempt”;
  • “I’m not from their circle”;
  • “You can’t find friends as an adult”;
  • “I don’t have time to waste time trying to make friends. This is not serious, we need to work, and not engage in nonsense”;
  • “To make acquaintance with someone, to start communicating, you need to abandon yourself, pretend, please.”

This is just a small part of what people say to avoid meeting new people or communicating with someone. In fact, it all comes down to the complexes, insecurities, fears, anxiety and negative thinking of the person himself. He is afraid of people, considers himself unworthy, bad, and does not love himself.

Important! Without interaction with society, a person cannot know himself, the world around him, and other people.

OWN PEOPLE: Strategies for creating a new social circle

Friends are not relatives, you can choose them. In the real world, there are not many opportunities for adults to make new acquaintances with like-minded people

Friends are not relatives, you can choose them . In the real world, there are not many opportunities for adults to make new acquaintances with like-minded people, it seems: on social networks they are all, these like-minded people, gathered together, all as if chosen from the same positive qualities.

And we increasingly live in our “digital tribe.” How good, strong and useful this friendship is, says psychologist Ann Devin.

How to create a new social circle

In fact, large groups of strangers on social networks are not such a good substitute for real social circles with people you know personally.

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And such communication will not save you from loneliness, because while living a “digital friendship”, you lose sight of the fact that it is fueled by several myths, the debunking of which can greatly surprise you, and often disappoint you.

Myth 1. I instantly feel that this is “my” person

This is a very Western idea of ​​an instant feeling of “soul mate.” If you try to surround yourself only with deeply kindred souls, you can very quickly experience negative changes both on an individual and on a social level.

As a result, you push away those parts of yourself that you know less, so you will not see the same traits in that “stranger”, whom because of this you will not feel “your own”, but it is precisely such a person who could help you open up more fully.

The magic is not in the instant recognition of a “soulmate,” but in the moment when you accept the possibility of your own transformation through communication with a person who is not “exactly the same” as you.

Myth 2. My tribe is forever!

Let's remember history: even real tribes often dispersed due to completely natural reasons. Civil strife, wars, famine, natural disasters.

What to do if the tribe ceases to exist as such?

What the ancients did: join another or start collecting their own, new.

A tribe is like a garden - it needs care and nutrition, it is in constant transformation: someone left for another city, someone got married, someone “outgrew” their common interests - these people change their tribe, their social circle.

Today's "tribes" must be ready for this, open, fluid. What remains constant is the “heart of the tribe”—the sense of togetherness and belonging for everyone.

Myth 3. I will never be alone again in my tribe.

A healthy and mature adult can adequately withstand the tension caused by a difference of opinion, a kind of healthy conflict, he is able to take responsibility for his emotions and not blame others.

When the peak of the conflict has passed, a mature person tries to return to love and harmony as quickly as possible. In ancient times, a member of a tribe could not simply leave just because someone made him angry. He had to deal with it.

The tribe teaches you how to live and love in the company of people. The tribe isn't supposed to protect you from yourself or people you don't like; on the contrary, the tribe reveals to you who you are through interactions with other people.

Fatal errors

Many modern people make friends in a completely different way than they should. For example, in order to cultivate a sense of group, belonging, you must avoid the three main mistakes, be above these three negative tendencies.

Disapproval is judgment of oneself and others.

Like: “I’m too fat/thin, etc.” both towards oneself and towards others. This is a terrible mental trap that leaves you feeling empty, frustrated, angry and lonely, so you do not accept yourself or others. Judgment is the worst habit of our culture, the number one cause of loneliness. And you need to cultivate acceptance and approval within yourself. Start accepting and approving of yourself, and then of other people.

Emptyness is both an experience and an opinion.

You may be thinking, “I feel so bad I can’t take it anymore,” “Why did this happen to me? Why me?" or “Life is meaningless, how can that be?”

What you need to learn is to make a contract with yourself.

Some cultures have the concept that our spirit is born, dies, and returns, depending on the period of our life, which is full of surprises, including unpleasant ones.

Understand that life is like this, be not a victim, but a participant in the exciting story of your life. Accept what you cannot control, let loss pass through your world like winter. And it will end like winter.

Homelessness is when you feel like a stranger everywhere.

This position completely deprives you of the opportunity to be part of a group, tribe, family, or friendly company. You think that you have no place anywhere, no one loves or accepts you, the world is terrible.

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What you need is to learn to accept and receive. Don’t push away the world, opportunities, people - accept it as life offers it to you. People, places, objects around you are your companions on the journey called Life.

Tribe Plan

You can start implementing strategies today to create a wonderful, rich and supportive network, a true tribe.

They invite you - go

Start saying yes to invitations. Understand that every invitation is a door that providence opens for you, this is exactly the opportunity to find a person close in spirit. It is especially useful to agree to a “going out” when you especially want to refuse.

Help others

Live with the attitude: “What can I give?” Because it is given to you if you give. Hold the door for a stranger, show the way to someone who is lost, look for ways to help others every day. Give us what you yourself would like to receive most.

Decide

Choose a community that is already organized around what is important to you. This is your ready-made “home”. Go boldly and feel at home there. Convince yourself that your place is waiting for you. Choose a group today and make a plan to become a member.

Healing

Ask yourself: What is my deepest emotional wound?

And then spend the day working with her. You don't always know exactly where it hurts the most, sometimes it takes time to find the answer. What stands in the way between you and attachment to people. The neglect you suffered as a child?

Trauma sustained in a relationship with an unsuccessful partner?

Volunteer, for example, at a shelter for victims of domestic violence or at a children's shelter. Take the opportunity to learn to trust life and people again.

Exploring the alien

Think about what and who has been pushed to the margins of your world. Now go explore these “outskirts”.

Ask yourself: “Who is invisible in my world?”

Are there children in your life? Aged people?

What about people of different ages, genders, political beliefs? Make a list of adjectives that characterize you, five in total.

And then add adjectives with the opposite meaning to them. Is this opposite person in your life?

Get out of your comfort zone, delve into the unknown, not as a tourist (for fun), but as an involved observer. Let new contacts transform you.published If you have any questions on this topic, ask them to the specialists and readers of our project here

PS And remember, just by changing your consciousness, we are changing the world together! © econet

How to expand your social circle

First of all, you need to determine what internal psychological problems are bothering you specifically and deal with it. To do this, you need to turn to your past, childhood memories. As a rule, destructive beliefs are put into the child’s head by parents. But if you look at them with an adult eye through the prism of critical thinking, it turns out that this is not true. Try right now to find a source and a refutation for each of your beliefs.

And this needs to be taught to children!

Most parents do not monitor who their children are friends with. Nevertheless, rich people strive to create a normal environment for their children. Educated, cultural. Good socialization, a normal society - and the child will grow up tuned in the right direction! Just don't force the children. It is necessary to explain why it is important to communicate with children who have a future. That contacts and networking are very important!

Don't forget - a person alone will not achieve anything. It is important that he has like-minded people next to him with whom he can move in the right direction! The “why do you need it” approach from a loved one is a killer of the mood, a lack of desire to do something. We have already written about how important it is to create the right motivation for the brain, how it gives energy to realize goals and plans. So having friends who will understand and support is immensely important!

JoeInfoMedia journalist Diana Lynn notes: the most important thing is to create the right attitude, and move in accordance with this attitude. Then any “you won’t succeed” will not lead you astray. But if there is some kind of self-doubt, any lack of faith of friends in a person can deprive him of the opportunity to develop... Which means you need to make friends not only successful ones, but also those who believe in you. Good friends to you!

Advice from a psychologist

A few more psychological recommendations that will help you expand your social circle and increase the number of friends:

  1. Be positive, smile and be open. Come up with an original phrase for dating.
  2. At every meeting or event you attend, try to get 2-3 contacts. It is not necessary to agree on something right away. Your goal is to get a phone number. Then you will call and offer something.
  3. Help and give advice only if you are asked to do so.
  4. Learn to ask questions that require a detailed answer, and answer in detail, but to the point.
  5. Be yourself, appreciate your uniqueness and love yourself.

Learn to always leave a positive impression of yourself and the last word. For example, a person says “thank you” to you, and you respond to him: “You’re welcome.” I'm sure you would do the same."

On our life's journey, we meet different people. Some enter our life and immediately leave it, others linger a little longer, and there are those who remain with us forever. In many ways, our success, our mood and even our lives depend on these people. In this article I want to answer the question: “Why is the right network so important to your success?”

Do you know such expressions: “You got into bad company”, “Who you hang out with is the one you get” or “Tell me who your friend is, and I’ll tell you who you are”?

That's right! Every person is looking for friends among “his own”. A homeless person will communicate with homeless people, a hired worker with hired workers, and a businessman with businessmen. Very rarely do these boundaries cross. Have you ever seen a rich man who is friends with a beggar? Me not!

Now imagine that your long-time dream is to open your own business, but life has decreed that you are stuck up to your neck in the ranks of hired workers. Every day you wake up thinking about how you wish you could change everything. But as soon as you start talking about it, your beloved friends and relatives begin to sing their song: “Are you crazy? What business? Yes, this is funny! Work for yourself at your job and work! Keep your head down! Maybe they’ll give you a promotion!” Yes, it’s very difficult to go against the crowd, especially if they are family, but there’s nothing you can do. If you are determined to succeed, then you need to break everything, and you need to start with your environment.

So, how can you gather the social circle you need?

1. Decide firmly what you want to do. Set a clear, clear and achievable goal for yourself.

2. Join the environment that suits you. When you find yourself in the right environment, you will grasp the material faster and constantly receive new information.

3. Learn from the masters. Communication with the master will speed up the process. Before you will be a living example of success and a train of knowledge that will undoubtedly be useful to you.

4. Communicate only with positive people. Eliminate the word negative from your vocabulary. Positive people will always support you and cheer you up.

The most important thing is not to listen to anyone and not to be afraid of anything. Eliminate people from your life who slow down your personal progress. Advice from the outside and not relevant, lack of respect for your interests, ridicule of your venture or idea, all this should remain out of your life. Imagine where you could be in five years if you start moving now. And imagine where you will be if you don't start and listen to your great aunt's advice.

Remember, the right circle of friends is the direct road to success! __ The post was created with the support of mypresswall.ru, where you can order https://mypresswall.ru/ for your presentation or celebration at reasonable prices.

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