Have you ever started dating your best friend?


A guy in love can rack his brain all day long, thinking about how to start dating the girl he likes so much. It would seem that in such a matter, just take it and act, but not everything is so simple. In order for the young lady not to refuse, you will have to take into account many factors and prepare a whole strategy of conquest. After all, girls are shy people, and a lover can easily be embarrassed by such a proposal. Or maybe she is not yet ready to take communication into a serious direction. For an attempt to be successful, you need to develop a clear plan of action.

What is it like to date?

What does the words “dating a girl” mean? Having the intention of approaching his chosen one with this proposal, the guy most likely imagines the future relationship as a continuous series of pleasant events. And this is partly true - the dating period is filled with a unique feeling of happiness, especially if the girl fully responds to her lover’s feelings.

However, along with the joy of the closeness of a loved one, the young man also receives a significant share of responsibility for his girlfriend. In addition to the fact that the girl will need to be protected from any manifestations of aggression from the outside, the young man will also have to defend her right to be present in his life. Many of his relatives or acquaintances may be against the established relationship, and the determination with which the young man stands up for his love will play a big role in the development of tender feelings.

What does it mean to date a girl? Remaining faithful and counting on reciprocal loyalty, being on your friend’s side in any controversial moments and being able to listen - all of these can become pleasant responsibilities if you do not perceive them as a heavy burden. Even difficult situations that arise during the building of a new relationship can become a reliable platform for the further growth of young love.

Show leadership qualities

What does true leadership look like? In the phrase “I said!”, hitting the table with your fist and a majestic expression on your face? Hardly, more like despotism and tyranny. Then what is the answer?

Being a leader = taking responsibility. For safety, for reputation, for feelings. Girls love it when their man:

  • does not tolerate self-pity. Not to be confused with sympathy. “I'm tired from doing nothing” and “I'm tired because I worked hard” are different things;
  • does not allow himself to whine or be capricious in serious situations. If a guy sleepily mutters to his alarm clock “morning, you’re so scary,” but still gets up for work, that’s cute. If he refuses to help carry heavy bags of groceries because “it’s morning,” that’s whining;
  • solves problems on his own and can even help his partner. Within adequate limits. If it’s not the first time she’s had too much alcohol and crashed someone’s car, it’s better to think about whether such a person is needed at all;
  • performs male duties around the house or troubleshoots problems in other effective ways. A professional plumber, electrician, gardener, builder, painter rolled into one is either a utopia or an actor in “18+” films. Therefore, if sockets spark in the house, and the young man does not understand them, he has every right to solve the problem differently - call a specialist;
  • demonstrates determination and confidence. Flood, fire, bankruptcy, bandits or a spider on the wall - girls want to know that their chosen one will not stand aside, but will show heroism by taking action.

Preparing for an important step

Before calling a girl on a first date, you need to try to reduce the likelihood of her refusal, or rather, she needs to please her. Young people can know each other all their lives, but only in the perspective of a future relationship will the girl look at the young man with “wide open eyes,” appreciating him no longer as a comrade, but as a potential life partner. After all, dating a girl (which also means meeting at least partly her expectations) is also an opportunity to look at yourself as an adult.

The guy should remember everything he previously knew about the girl’s interests, her likes and dislikes. If he does not have such information, you can look for the necessary material on social networks, on the personal page of your chosen one, but psychologists do not recommend asking her friends. It is unknown in what form this information will reach the girl, and how she will perceive the news that they are “digging” behind her back in her life. It’s better to approach her with a proposal poorly prepared and armed only with your sympathy than to knowingly run into hostility.

What does it mean to ask a girl out and how to do it?

First, the young man should make sure that his sympathy for the girl is dictated by stronger impulses than friendship. Strong physical attraction, not associated with high feelings, and the excitement of competition for the heart of a “popular” girl can be mistaken for love experiences. Having ruled out the possibility of an erroneous perception of the situation, all that remains is to act:

  1. We need to find out what the chances are that the girl will respond positively to the proposal. To do this, you need to compare all available information about her interests and prepare a plan for further action, taking into account all the information collected.
  2. The way to propose to your chosen one to be together does not have to be original and certainly not public. The young man should remember that this is not a request to marry him and unnecessary pomp can only confuse the girl.
  3. Having made a decision, you should act quickly, and not walk around your friend, bewildering her with your hints.

Of course, it may also happen that the girl’s plans do not include a serious relationship, or her heart is already taken. In this case, you should not dwell on failure and devote more time to self-realization. Also, what does it mean to start dating a girl?

What to interest?

Previously, the scenario was simpler. It was enough to have mutual sympathy, a few dates, sex, and everything would work out on its own. It worked in the USSR. Today the world has changed, we need to work completely differently. A modern guy has two options for the development of events.

  1. Work from resources. That is, simply please the girl in different ways. Give her expensive gifts, take her to cool restaurants, movies, buy trinkets
    . Clothes, etc. It is worth noting that over time this method works worse and worse, and rightly so.
  2. Work from your personality. You must show how interesting and unusual a person you are. She should clearly see your values, moral advantages over other guys. You also need to let her know that you may not be available to her, and she should already show some activity in order to start a relationship with you.

Which of these scenarios will work better? Here I’ll better explain to you why you shouldn’t take the first path. There are a lot of reasons.

  1. Girls love interesting guys who can surprise you with something other than their wallet. The times of crisis are over. Be that as it may, the quality of life is improving every day. Therefore, girls no longer need so badly a person who can simply provide for her.
  2. Girls like it when a guy has some kind of intangible value. It should be interesting, unusual, new and perhaps the ultimate experience for her.
  3. Inaccessibility is a very interesting quality that works great with beautiful girls. Why does she need another available guy when she has hundreds of them?
  4. If you take the first path, you will most likely fail over time. As a result, you will lose your fat wallet, time and nerves. Why do you need such sacrifices when you can make everything much simpler and more interesting?

You can be interested in non-standard behavior, crazy behavior, there are a lot of techniques, you can read about them in my numerous articles. You can do it even simpler and sign up for a course. This way you’ll quickly understand what’s what, get a specific step-by-step working diagram and easily answer the question yourself on how to start a relationship with a girl correctly.

If you like a classmate

What does it mean to date a girl 14 years old or younger? The specifics of the chosen one’s age do not yet imply active romantic actions on the part of the companion. A teenage girl wants to feel like an adult, but physiologically she is not yet ready for intimacy and will diligently avoid any form of intimate caresses (except kissing).

If a boy is the same age as a girl, there are no big difficulties in maintaining a certain distance. The main thing for young people is not to be led by curiosity and not to try to completely copy the behavior of older couples. There are many other interesting aspects in adult life that are worthy of emulation, such as the ability to trust each other or be faithful.

For older guys

What does it mean to date a girl of high school or college age? It is important for older girls to see next to them not so much a “popular” as a meaningful young man with prospects.

A sense of humor and the ability to be yourself under any circumstances will help a guy focus attention on himself. Any attempts by a guy to attribute unusual qualities to himself or to create the illusion of a more successful person around himself are obviously doomed to failure and will only prevent him from capturing the heart of the desired person.

In addition to working on oneself (improving the ability to conduct a conversation and forming a decent external image), a young man should also think about the need to have personal funds. Not too often, but from time to time you will need to take your friend to the cinema or cafeteria and please her with small gifts.

If a young man is still in school and does not have the opportunity to earn extra money, he can talk to his parents and ask them to allocate money for personal expenses. It is quite possible for a student to get a job with an hourly wage and thereby prove, first of all, to himself that he is ready for an independent life.

Be careful

Women's ears are an erogenous zone. And it’s not only about the sensitivity of the shells and earlobes, but also about the passionate love for compliments. However, not for everyone. How to use nice words for a girl correctly:

  • be diverse. Even the best praise gets boring if you use it all the time;
  • do not forget about sincerity. Saying “You have model height” to a girl who is 1.58 cm is making her think that this is a mockery;
  • pay attention to little things. She's probably already been told that she has a beautiful hairstyle and an elegant dress. It is better to note her femininity, the beautiful line of her shoulders or graceful fingers, “like an aristocrat”;
  • move away from common phrases. “You are very beautiful/sexy/cute” everyone says, which devalues ​​these words. “When you smile, your eyes sparkle like the surface of a lake on a sunny day” is a rarer type of compliment.

To develop the ability to find the right words at the right moment, it is better to read lyrics. Especially Shakespeare's sonnets. And if giving compliments doesn’t work at all, you can simply quote lines.

Correct behavior is the key to success

Having invited a girl to date (which means taking upon himself the responsibility to support her in all areas of life), the guy should not forget that the time of adolescence is a period of easy relationships, without being burdened with overwhelming responsibilities. A young man (except in certain cases) should not shoulder the full financial support of his girlfriend, meet all her desires halfway, or become “his own person” in her family circle.

Proper placement of emphasis in relationships is a very important point that does not have to be discussed directly. A guy can simply hint to his chosen one that he is not yet ready to meet her parents or that the amount of his additional income does not correspond to her desire to rent a separate apartment.

The decision to have a fulfilling sex life is also not a matter that either partner can make on their own. If a girl wants to meet (which means she is ready to enter adulthood), this does not mean that she wants to engage in sexual relations. Rushing into such a sensitive topic may do more harm than deepen tender feelings. In any case, guys should get to know each other better before moving on to intimate relationships.

What to do if a girl refuses

What does it mean that dating a girl if the circumstances have turned out well is no longer a secret, but when the chosen one refuses the offer to be together? There can be many reasons for this behavior of a friend:

  • the guy was unable to express his desire to date in the right words;
  • the girl’s ideas about the “prince” do not coincide with the image of the young man;
  • the guy was too intrusive;
  • the young man had created an unfavorable reputation for himself.

Difficulties may also arise in the life of the girl herself, for example, her parents do not allow her to date boys until she graduates from school. Having received a refusal, the young man has the right to ask about the reason, but should not turn the conversation in such a way that the girl is forced to justify herself.

If a young man’s feelings are strong enough and he is not ready to give up plans for his beloved, he can continue to be close to her, showing her attention as a faithful comrade. In any case, the girl will not forget the proposal made to her once and, perhaps, will later reconsider her attitude towards the guy.

First date8

The second act of the play “I Want a Girl” is the first meeting. To begin with, the lady should be invited correctly.

There is no need to rack your brains over the proposal for too long. Tell it like it is: I want to meet and spend time together. The message can be spiced up with humor, but this is not a requirement.

The girl definitely agrees. A guy who is not interested is not given contact information.

“Pickup artists” distinguish 3 types of dates:

  1. Fast;
  2. Combined;
  3. Comfortable.

Such a division does not have much practical meaning. After all, any place is suitable for a first date. The main thing is to coordinate it with your companion in advance.

You can start the meeting with something non-trivial. Jumping on trampolines, roller skating, cycling. A little joint activity will help strengthen feelings and tune in to the desired romantic mood.

Later it’s worth moving to a restaurant and cafe. There, share pleasant memories and learn more about each other.

The restaurant must be booked in advance to avoid unpleasant incidents. Often people go to the first place they come across and are left with nothing. Girls love people who think things through.

Transition from dating to relationship

A serious relationship for a young couple begins from the moment a decision is made about a future together. It is not necessary that, having voiced their desire to get married or move to a new level of intimacy, young people should immediately begin to live together, because often young lovers simply do not have a sufficient material basis for this. However, there are circumstances that come into force as soon as a young couple changes the phase of an easy relationship to a serious one (for example, meeting relatives).

Usually, at the beginning of their journey, young people need help from their parents, as from people who are more experienced in life issues and financially secure. However, loved ones are not always ready to provide this help, believing that youthful love requires a greater test of time or that the girl and the guy are not well suited for each other.

Faced with opposition, young people must show perseverance, but this can only be done on one condition: by proving through their actions that their decision to be together is justified and not subject to discussion. The boy should (without interrupting his studies) start earning money, and the girl should learn how to run a household. Having made sure that lovers take their future seriously, even the most zealous skeptics will calm down and stop creating obstacles.

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