Psychological tests
How to find out if your child is ready for school, part 1
How to find out if your child is ready for school, part 2
How to find out if your child is ready for school, part 3, with test pictures
How to find out if your child is ready for school, part 4
Test “Family Drawing” (“My Family”)
Test "Ladder" ("Ten steps")
Tests “Left-handed, right-handed or ambidextrous?”
Temperament test (“What type of temperament predominates in your child?”)
How does a personal conversation with a psychologist go?
Today, many people have rather vague ideas about individual consultations with a practicing psychologist.
Despite the fact that there are now quite a few practicing psychologists, and more and more people are beginning to use their services to resolve their issues, those who have never been to a specialist are still guided by popular myths.
Before the first meeting, I was asked more than once very unexpected (for me) questions:
- Is it true that we will have to work five times a week?
- Will you put me on the couch?
- Are you and I going to draw or fill out some tests?
- You will put me into hypnosis and I will tell you everything, right?
- I read the Internet and realized that I have neurosis and depression, as well as panic attacks and paranoia, do you treat this?
It is clear that myths about people meeting with a psychologist are largely formed from films, excerpts read on the Internet, and rumors that “someone once went to someone...”.
All this gives a rather vague picture of consultations. Because many films demonstrate either old approaches to working with people, or are based on the same myths that exist in society. They have no connection with reality. And from scraps read on the Internet and rumors from friends, you can put together such a “cocktail” of fantasies that then you can only wonder how different everything really is.
Therefore, in my blog I decided to write about how a real conversation with a practicing psychologist goes. Naturally, with the caveat that I am writing first of all about my consultations, the work of my colleagues may differ in many ways from my practice.
I like to describe the essence of individual work today in this metaphor...
Metaphor
Let's imagine your inner mental world in the image of a forest. In general, in general, you know your forest better than I do, since you live in it. But you have certain corners, areas, territories that you often (perhaps all your life) avoid. For one reason or another.
Maybe they scare you, perhaps you were used to running past them, did not consider them valuable, it was a shame to look there, you didn’t know that you could go there... It is in these dark corners of your forest that something important, some answers are often found to questions, knowledge about yourself.
I am a guest in your forest, it is new to me. But I often walk through forests, preferably finding myself with a person in such uncharted territories. In some ways they are similar to my dark corners (which I also regularly explore) and the areas of other clients. Therefore, together with me, it may be a little easier for you to encounter this or that experience, to visit an avoided place.
The better you navigate your inner forest, the better you can become accustomed to the world around you. Because our perception of the environment often depends on sensitivity to our processes, on understanding ourselves.
Dark corners become a resource, and a choice appears: to use it or not. For example, should I pick raspberries for Another person next to the den - or should I tame the bear first? Or is this man not worth the risk? You can figure this out for yourself. And don’t go around a mile away to the place where, according to the parents’ stories, there should be a den.
Conditions
Now let's move on to specifics. How does everything happen in terms of process organization, conditions and boundaries?
Space. We are sitting opposite each other. At a sufficient distance so that you can talk comfortably. I usually suggest that the client sit on the sofa, since he can sit comfortably on it and choose a suitable position for himself. I use a wheelchair and sit in it. Tea, coffee, drinking water, and napkins are nearby.
Time. The standard duration of a consultation is 60 minutes. But I don't make this limit a hard and fast rule. I usually allocate 10-15 minutes. at the end of the meeting. The maximum time I spend with a client (in one consultation) is 90 minutes.
Actions. First of all, we talk and talk. In the process of work, I can suggest some exercise or experiment. For example, draw your family, express your emotional state with a gesture. But only if it is important in a specific conversation. I don’t conduct tests; I prefer live communication.
Frequency of meetings. The standard frequency of consultations is once a week. A completely normal regimen is 2 times a month. During an acute crisis period, we can meet 2 times a week if necessary. A couple of times I had short courses for 10 meetings 3 times a week. It was also, in principle, normal and effective.
Payment. Personal conversation is paid after the meeting. I accept payment in various forms: cash, electronic money.
Treatment. I am not a doctor and I do not provide treatment. I am a psychologist and help a mentally healthy person (without a psychiatric diagnosis) make sense of his life. If in the process of work I understand that a doctor’s consultation is required, then I can refer the client to reliable medical specialists (neurologist, psychotherapist or psychiatrist) with whom I cooperate.
Number of meetings. And lastly... - How many meetings do you need to get results? This is a fairly common question I hear from potential clients.
It's impossible to predict! Much will depend on your request, your resources, self-curiosity, desire to understand, willingness to put effort into the work and, finally, what you ultimately consider the result.
You can understand something about yourself and your situation in the first three meetings. But I saw fairly reliable results primarily in people with whom we regularly met for quite a long time. Because the psyche is rebuilt slowly. And if a person has a glitch in his interactions with people, then it takes time and joint efforts to detect it and try to act differently.
PS: As for self-knowledge, this is an endless process. And each of us determines for ourselves when enough is enough!
Psychological surveys
First-grader, how are you doing?
Educational games and toys for preschoolers and primary school children
What do our children draw?
Is mom at work or at home? What's better? (opinion of mother and psychologist)
Is mom at work or at home? What's better? (survey results, life experiences of readers)
Sex education (survey results, psychologist’s comments, sharp opinions)
Baby and moving (survey results, psychologist’s comments, readers’ opinions)
"Conversations with a psychologist"
After a pause to think about topics and a little rest for inspiration, the “ Conversations with a Psychologist ” column begins its work on a regular basis. And again I am with you, Orthodox psychologist Maria Parshina (Zinchenko).
Orthodox psychologist Maria Parshina (Zinchenko)
Why do we need a family?
I thought for a long time about where to start: this is interesting, “tasty” and relevant. As a result, faced with a classic female problem - the inability to make a choice - I decided to hit the road from the starting point: why do we need a family? We talk so much about the essence of family, its value, the desire to create it, but few people ask themselves this very question - why am I doing/wanting to do this?
Before you continue reading, stop for a second and try to give your answer. From my experience, I can say that few people ask this question and, when faced with it, experience bewilderment and difficulties. Very often in consultations I hear – well, why? Well, this is banal... and then a pause... The client begins to think and understands - it seems like the answer should be easy, on the surface - after all, I want this so much, I’ve been striving for this for so long and thinking, but I can’t answer. Here are the most frequent answers I hear: - but what about without a family? - to be loved; - to take care of someone, to love someone; - birth of children.
Happy couple
A lighthouse that prevents you from drowning in moments of trials, doubts and pain
You may ask me: why do we need to ask it at all? You and I know that the result very often depends on what goal we set for ourselves and how exactly we formulate it. It’s the same with creating a family: when setting off on this, God willing, long and difficult journey, we must understand for ourselves why we are doing this, so that our chosen goal is like a beacon that does not allow us to drown in moments of trials, doubts and pain (which happen in every family), and allows you to stay on the chosen course, no matter what.
The answers I gave above are certainly important, except that the first one raises serious questions for me - it is important to remember that the life and path of every person is equally important, regardless of whether he goes through it alone or together with his spouse.
Happy Orthodox family
The meaning of marriage
Also, these answers certainly cannot go separately - the birth of children alone cannot, for example, be the meaning of marriage. You may ask why? After all, it is a fairly natural goal, like the others listed. Let's imagine that the couple failed to give birth to a baby. In such a situation, a person who has set this particular goal risks losing the meaning of preserving the family.
The path to God is colossal work on oneself through Salvation
For me, as an Orthodox psychologist and a woman, the most important task of creating a family is Salvation, changing yourself for the better, becoming a better person than I am now. We must remember that when getting married, each of us chooses a very long road, with many turns, changes and surprises. On this path, of course, love must await us, but we must also be prepared for difficulties and enormous work on ourselves. It is over yourself, and not over your spouse.
The path to God of a young family
On this journey, we will more than once find ourselves in situations where we begin to catch ourselves thinking - do I love my spouse? Is this the man I married or who I married? Why should I endure all this, resign myself? And the most capacious and comprehensive answer may be - Salvation, the understanding that the Lord gave me this person, and me to him, so that we could learn love, become better, if it is His Will - give birth to children, etc. But the most important thing above all this is God and the path to him!
It is important to remember that each person chooses his own goals and answers to the question I posed. In such a small post, I tried to express my thoughts on this topic.
Discussion and comments
In the comments, share your impressions of the problem raised and perhaps your answer to this question.
I am ready for an interesting discussion and any questions.
What to remember when going to a psychologist
Once you decide to see a psychologist, you should not form high expectations. Many people think that all they have to do is cross the threshold, and everything will change with the wave of a magic wand. One of the functions of consultation is to form a correct understanding of the essence of this process. It is important to dispel false expectations about such interactions. To a large extent, a specialist helps you understand yourself, your own motivations, and find the connection between mental and emotional constructs. Working with the client’s emotions also requires special attention from the psychologist. This may be a response to blocked emotions, an analysis of motivations. As a result, consulting a psychologist makes it possible to form a completely different attitude towards the situation and develop new strategies.
Having decided to consult a psychologist, you must be prepared to understand yourself, to find connections between your thoughts, emotions and expectations. As a result, you can change your life for the better.
It is important to understand that such interaction involves constant internal work that only you can do. An important issue is the sufficient professional competence of a practicing psychologist. Having decided that you need help, be sure to inquire about the psychologist’s education, work experience, and opinions about his work. Overcome life's problems, making your life more harmonious and happy.
Tasks and expectations: when you need to talk with a psychologist
Despite the prevalence of information, there is often not sufficient understanding of the need for such communication. There are quite a lot of different specialists on the market for near-psychological services. Therefore, it is important to distinguish between their competencies. The main thing a psychologist needs to do is to help understand the situation and activate a person’s resource capabilities. And then the gradual elimination of difficulties begins. Constantly changing living conditions require the need to get rid of past life trauma and cope with negative emotional states. People often resort to the help of a psychologist when building relationships is complicated or when looking for a partner. In a difficult situation, it may be impossible for one person to “see” the situation from different sides.
It is important to remember that a psychologist does not offer ways to solve a problem or specific advice on resolving a life situation. However, it can provide necessary and adequate psychological assistance in a difficult situation.
The main thing is that a conversation with a psychologist is not intended to give immediate advice to a person. After all, this is how people often perceive coming to a professional. You should also not try to establish friendly relationships during work, which can complicate communication and lead to unpredictable consequences.
Conversation with a psychologist: what is it really?
Psychological help is extremely necessary in many cases. Appeals to specialists have become especially frequent in the modern realities of life, filled with uncertainty and often outright violence. Seeking such support is necessary to solve various life problems. It is important to distinguish whether a conversation with a psychologist or psychotherapy is needed? It is also possible to combine the work of two specialists.
Different types of assistance differ from each other. The duration, as well as the nature of the interaction between the specialist and the client, are of a different nature. Psychological counseling is professional communication between a psychologist and a client, in which additional personal resources are updated with the help of specially organized interaction. When receiving such help, a person is helped to understand his motivations, goals, aspirations; ways of coping with emotions are developed. When choosing a place to receive help, pay attention to the personality of the psychologist himself. It is important that the professional does not create a repulsive impression and has a pleasant communication style.
