For what reason can a wife's feelings cool down?
It has long been known that women have colossal patience and a sense of suffering. A woman can endure violence, infidelity, and her husband’s alcoholism for years just to save her family. She thinks about children, about an established life, about the future and, last of all, about herself. She will feel a maternal feeling for her alcoholic husband, whom it is a pity to leave or put up with male infidelities, thinking that this is how it should be. The decision to divorce is made in extreme cases, when a woman understands that her husband will not change. There are few serious reasons why a relationship with a wife breaks down:
- betrayal;
- alcoholism or drug addiction;
- violence.
Divorces also happen due to domestic and financial problems, lack of mutual understanding, and inability to negotiate. Families are destroyed due to the interference of relatives, due to problems with children. Not all spouses can withstand the test of tragedy. But most often, women leave their men precisely when they abuse alcohol, periodically cheat, and use violence. Moreover, we are talking not only about physical violence, but also about psychological and moral violence. Constant humiliation, complete control and jealousy also lead to the fact that the wife’s feelings cool down, and she leaves the family.
And one more reason for divorce: the wife fell out of love and left for another man. Moreover, this can happen against the background of other problems. When a woman is not satisfied with certain aspects of her family life, sooner or later she will become interested in another person. At first it might just be communicating with a person who understands and supports her. But then the spiritual connection will turn into a physical relationship. And in this case, it will be difficult to keep a wife who has grown cold.
Wife stopped loving her husband because of insults
Women who come for psychological consultations often complain that their men allow themselves to call them names and behave very defiantly with them. Many of these women have suffered emotional abuse. It would seem that a man does not raise his hand against a woman, but humiliates her dignity in every possible way. By driving a woman into a corner, a man prevents her from feeling confident and beautiful. If a wife stops loving her husband , but continues to live with him, most likely she has nowhere to simply go. Don't worry, with a little patience, it will be impossible to return her love.
Instead of reconsidering your attitude towards a woman at the first stages of quarrels, paying attention to the woman’s words, her emotions, tears, men continue to humiliate their women. One of my clients told me how her husband told her that no one else needed her but him, so he was calm. He has taken a mistress, he doesn’t want to leave her as his wife, and she should be happy that he doesn’t leave her and gives her at least some kind of relationship.
On the topic of humiliation of women in the family, I have an interesting article: “Psychological violence in the family.” In this article, I, as a family psychologist, describe in detail the stages of gradual emotional dependence in a relationship.
I want to divorce my husband. Well, I just stopped loving my husband. We have three children.
Article 19. Divorce in the civil registry office
1. If there is mutual agreement to dissolve the marriage of spouses who do not have common minor children, the dissolution of the marriage is carried out in the civil registry office.
2. Divorce at the request of one of the spouses, regardless of whether the spouses have common minor children, is carried out at the civil registry office, if the other spouse:
declared missing by the court;
declared incompetent by the court;
convicted of committing a crime to imprisonment for a term of over three years.
3. Divorce and the issuance of a certificate of divorce are carried out by the civil registry office after a month has passed from the date of filing the application for divorce.
4. State registration of divorce is carried out by the civil registry office in the manner established for state registration of civil status acts.
Article 20. Consideration of disputes arising between spouses upon divorce in the civil registry office
Disputes about the division of the common property of spouses, the payment of funds for the maintenance of a needy disabled spouse, as well as disputes about children arising between spouses, one of whom is declared incompetent by the court or sentenced to imprisonment for a term of over three years for committing a crime (clause 2 of Article 19 of this Code) are considered in court, regardless of divorce, by the civil registry office.
Article 21. Divorce in court
1. Divorce of a marriage is carried out in court if the spouses have common minor children, except for the cases provided for in paragraph 2 of Article 19 of this Code, or in the absence of the consent of one of the spouses to dissolve the marriage.
2. Divorce is also carried out in court in cases where one of the spouses, despite his lack of objections, evades divorce from the civil registry office (refuses to submit an application, does not want to appear for state registration of divorce, etc.) .
Article 22. Divorce of marriage in court in the absence of consent of one of the spouses to divorce
1. Divorce in court is carried out if the court determines that further life together of the spouses and the preservation of the family is impossible.
2. When considering a case of divorce in the absence of the consent of one of the spouses to dissolve the marriage, the court has the right to take measures to reconcile the spouses and has the right to postpone the hearing of the case, assigning the spouses a period for reconciliation within three months.
Divorce is carried out if measures to reconcile the spouses are unsuccessful and the spouses (one of them) insist on dissolution of the marriage.
Article 23. Divorce of marriage in court with mutual consent of the spouses to dissolve the marriage
1. If there is mutual consent to dissolve the marriage of spouses who have common minor children, as well as the spouses specified in paragraph 2 of Article 21 of this Code, the court dissolves the marriage without clarifying the reasons for the divorce. Spouses have the right to submit to the court an agreement on children, provided for in paragraph 1 of Article 24 of this Code. In the absence of such an agreement or if the agreement violates the interests of children, the court takes measures to protect their interests in the manner prescribed by paragraph 2 of Article 24 of this Code.
2. Divorce of marriage is carried out by the court no earlier than the expiration of a month from the date the spouses filed an application for divorce.
The wife stopped loving her husband - reasons
“ The wife stopped loving her husband ” is a popular theme in many television shows today. All over the country, offended women tell how their husbands abuse them, take away their children, forbid them to meet with friends, limit communication with loved ones and parents, do not give them the opportunity to build a career or do what they love, and constantly keep them in fear and dependent on their husband for money. . The wife stopped loving her husband because, having given birth to a child, she was left alone with her problems. The husband continues to lead an idle lifestyle, seeing friends more often than rushing home to his wife and children. The wife stopped loving her husband because the husband was completely immersed in his career and stopped seeing the difference between the family atmosphere and the work environment, bringing home his businesslike disposition every day, raising his wife at home, teaching her life, as if talking to his subordinates. All these examples are familiar to me from my psychological practice. First, men themselves destroy their families, and then ask the question: “What’s the matter: why did my wife stop loving me?” As a woman and family psychologist, I know how difficult it can be to forgive a person for indifference towards you. Probably, indifference and indifference are one of the most painful feelings. After all, there is no worse pain for a person than realizing oneself is unnecessary and unclaimed. Every person and every living creature seeks affection and care. Our pets are drawn to us, we have tamed them and must take care of them. A woman expects care and support from a man. A man is a leader by nature, his task is to care and provide protection to his loved ones.
How to get your wife back if she left
What to do if the wife left the family and filed for divorce depends on the reasons for her action. If this happened because her husband cheated on her, you need to understand that it is the husband who is to blame. Even if the betrayal was a desperate step due to misunderstanding or an accident, the blame still lies entirely with the traitor. You need to understand that you cannot atone for guilt with an ordinary bouquet of flowers or a gift. If cheating has already happened before, then promises will not help improve the relationship. You can regain your feelings and gain trust again with a huge amount of patience. What is needed is not words, but actions:
- Give your wife time. She needs to cool down, take a break from problems and relax.
- Don't be intrusive. There is no need to annoy her with calls or requests. Moreover, there is no need to threaten and blackmail.
- Show you care. Even after breaking up, let her see that you are the closest person to her on whom she can rely.
- The woman you cheated with needs to be cut out of your life forever. If it is a colleague, change your place of work. Yes, it’s difficult to leave your favorite place, but if you value your family, you’ll have to do it.
- When you see that she has cooled down, talk to her. Convince her that this relationship was accidental, that it is connected with physiological needs, and that you only love your wife. It is important for a woman to know that the betrayal was not emotional, that there are no feelings for her mistress.
- And only then start taking action. Start with small, non-binding meetings and surprises. Do things that she will appreciate: pick up the children from kindergarten, spend time with her when your wife is busy, do some housework. Such care is much more valuable for a woman than flowers or going to restaurants.
If your wife left you because of problems with alcohol, decisive actions and actions are needed here. Women can endure alcoholism for many years, and if they leave, then promises for them are nothing more than empty words. You don't have to promise, but prove it with actions. If you cannot stop drinking on your own, seek help from a narcologist. Stop communicating with your drinking buddies. If your wife sees that you are determined to fight alcoholism, she will certainly forgive you.
In a number of other cases, saving the family and returning the wife’s love if she has fallen out of love can only be done by changing. You need to change your attitude towards your family, towards your spouse, listen to her opinions and claims. In some situations, you need to be able to give in and come to mutual understanding.
