What is important to understand and do
So, you have analyzed the causes of conflicts in the family and are determined to understand how you can improve your relationship with your husband after a major quarrel. It is possible to achieve this goal, but to do this, understand a few rules.
Your husband can't read your mind
Sometimes husbands don’t even understand what the essence of women’s complaints is. The spouse may be offended for several days, but he does not even pay attention. If you are not happy with something, you can directly tell your partner about it, but only without shouting or complaining, but smiling and looking into the eyes.
Give your husband time to himself
You should not demand that your husband spend all his free time with you. Men sometimes need privacy. Having collected his thoughts, the spouse will calm down and be more attentive towards the chosen one.
While your husband is left to his own devices, think about your hobbies. Remember how you have long wanted to start dancing, read an interesting book and meet with friends? Right now.
Know when to be quiet
Men don't like to be interrupted. Sometimes it is better to listen to a man and do as he wants, because he is the head of the family. If you don't take him into account, you won't have a family.
Do not criticize your loved one in front of relatives, friends, or acquaintances. This hurts pride and leads the couple to break up. Even if you have complaints against your husband, express them personally and in a calm tone.
Learn to forgive his mistakes
There are no ideal people. If you sincerely want to improve your relationship with your husband, you will have to understand him and forgive him for his mistakes and misunderstandings. When you treat your spouse with understanding, you will see reciprocity on his part.
Remember that by constantly reminding your spouse of his mistakes, you do not give him the incentive to become better. Instead, you alienate him from yourself and destroy the family.
Don't rush to conclusions
Often women become disappointed in their partner and think that it is better to break off the relationship. There is no need to rush to make a decision. It is not a fact that the next marriage will be better. Perhaps it won't exist at all.
Remember why you fell in love with this person. Surely these traits still exist in him. Your friendliness, kindness and concern will help him become the best version of himself.
Don't demand immediate decisions
If your marriage is on the verge of destruction, do not shift all responsibility for the relationship to your spouse. Don't rush him into making a decision. There is a possibility that he will want to leave the family to go where it is easier. Then he will repent, but the relationship will be destroyed. Give yourself and your spouse time to calm down and figure out how to move on.
Don't deny reality
If there are problems in a couple, do not try to run away from them or shut up. It’s better to face the difficulties and decide to deal with them. Think how good it will be if you overcome all differences hand in hand.
Sometimes troubles only strengthen a marriage, so you shouldn’t be afraid of them. If you want to understand how to improve family relationships, remember why you are together and how strong your love is. Realize that you don’t care about obstacles if you overcome them together.
Reasons for cooling relationships in marriage
Psychologists say that there are several main reasons why relationships between spouses become cooler over the years. Falling in love gives way to habit, husband and wife begin to clearly see each other's shortcomings.
To restore harmony to your relationship, understand the reasons for its loss:
- The desire to change a loved one. We associate our lives with a person, and then we realize that he is not what we would like. Habits, behavior patterns or character traits are annoying. But it is impossible to change someone without the desire of the person himself, so dissatisfaction with the situation accumulates and degenerates into a scandal.
- Underestimating your partner. Often one of the spouses believes that he makes a more tangible contribution to the relationship than his partner, but in return receives negligible. The result of such thoughts is resentment and feelings of irritation.
- Desire to control. Often wives read their husbands' correspondence and vice versa. It is very difficult to overcome the need to control another person's life. The reason for this is low self-esteem and mistrust, and the consequences are secrecy and mutual claims.
- Waiting for a child. Unfortunately, not all couples go well during this period. Women become irritable, complain about feeling unwell, and often feel tired. Husbands are not always ready to support them in this situation. As a result, passion and tenderness disappear from relationships, sex becomes rare, and this alienates the spouses.
- The appearance of the baby. With the birth of a baby, the usual way of life in the family changes. The couple doesn't get enough sleep, and the baby causes a lot of trouble. The wife devotes almost all her time to the baby, and her husband is offended by this state of affairs. It's sad, but most families break up during this difficult period. Not all men find the strength to stay with their beloved woman and child.
- Problems at work. Difficulties in the professional sphere often affect the family. If spouses do not support each other, they begin to grow apart.
- Difficulties with finances. Many men and women in marriage blame each other for financial difficulties. These accusations, as a rule, do not lead to anything constructive.
- Betrayal. When one of the spouses cheats, this becomes a serious reason for ending the relationship. If this happened once, then the relationship can still be improved. But when the traitor does not repent and continues unseemly acts, there is simply no point in maintaining such a relationship. The marriage breaks up.
Sometimes it is difficult to understand how to mend a crumbling relationship with a beloved husband on the verge of crisis. It is often difficult to return old feelings after a conflict. But if both partners take steps towards each other, then love can be restored. Plus, working on a relationship together is much more fun.
READ How to make your wife fall in love with you: advice from psychologists
Do as I want
Often at the beginning of family life, a girl is confident that she is capable of changing her partner. If relatives talk about the shortcomings of her lover, she assures that there is nothing wrong with it, because she can fix everything. But such relationships have little in common with love, since a loving person accepts the other completely, even his shortcomings.
It is interesting that by the age of 5–7 years a person’s character is almost completely formed. In the future, you can change your behavior a little, but the essence of the person remains the same. Changing a partner requires independent, sincere efforts, and it is almost impossible to influence this process from the outside. A wife cannot force her husband to change, just as he cannot force her to change.
Don't interfere, I'll do it myself
Often a woman lives with the feeling that her husband is not an independent man, but a child who needs to be constantly controlled and directed. This is a common cause of family tragedies. We try to guide the person on the right path, get him a job, don’t let him near the child (he might drop him), and control expenses. Such care is often underestimated. The husbands, tired of her, turn around and leave.
If not you
Men and women tend to look at others with envy, and giving thanks for what we already have is usually very difficult. For example, married girls would like to dance in clubs all night long, mothers complain that they are tired of spending all their time with their children. We tend to blame our husband for all our problems.
Women often say that if they had not linked their lives with their husbands, they would not have had to give up their careers and sit at home instead of traveling the world and suffering from financial problems.
But you can develop and travel with your family. Today it is not a problem to study remotely. It is useful to get out of the house from time to time, communicate with people, attend parties. Unfortunately, many choose the path of accusations and reproaches, because it is easier to criticize and come up with excuses than to change your life and work on yourself.
I spent the best years on you
Spouses often exhibit an unhealthy attitude towards family and marriage. They see themselves as victims who have received nothing in return for their lost youth. As a rule, what exactly a person gives in this marriage is not taken into account. It is also unclear what kind of gratitude he expects in return.
READ A manipulator: signs of a tyrant, reasons for behavior and ways to protect against emotional pressure
This behavior is transmitted from generation to generation, and it is very difficult to get away from it. There are few examples of a couple working together to overcome everyday difficulties. Girls do not know how to improve relationships with their husbands, and suffer because of this.
Witch's secrets
Women can't live without magic! Some tips from Feng Shui experts on how to preserve love feelings:
- Sleep to the right of your spouse.
- To prevent betrayal, place an amethyst under his bed foot.
- Use double items in your bedroom interior, they enhance love. For example, figures of animals or people.
- Place mirrors and screens so that the bed is not reflected in them.
- Try not to put technology in the bedroom.
- The approach to the bed must be free from all sides.
I myself once applied some of these tips at home in the hope of not improving, but meeting my love. That's
all for today. I’m wondering, do you believe that Feng Shui helps improve family relationships between spouses? Love and strong unions to everyone! June
How to save a marriage
Divorce statistics show that often married couples are unable to maintain their relationship and decide to divorce. Whatever the reason, there are steps you can take to figure out if you need to stay together.
If you analyze the reasons for quarrels, you can avoid making mistakes in the future. When a decision is made to break up, there is a chance that the next relationship will be more meaningful and happier.
Both spouses should think about how to improve family relationships with a husband or wife on the verge of divorce.
Before you take action, you should think about whether you need this marriage, whether you need to fight for it, or whether you can just separate peacefully.
After my husband's betrayal
Not every woman is ready to forgive infidelity, but if you are determined to save the marriage, you will have to understand the reasons for your husband’s infidelity. Pay attention to how your spouse behaves after the betrayal is discovered. If he repents, asks for forgiveness and says that his mistress means nothing to him, then listen. Perhaps the reason for his betrayal was a midlife crisis or excessive alcohol intoxication. You can try not to provoke your spouse to abuse alcohol in the future and become more sensitive to his problems.
READ What to do if your husband insults and humiliates: finding out the reasons and advice from psychologists
If your spouse says that he does not need forgiveness, but accuses you of cheating, then understand that this is a defensive reaction. In this case, trips to the left will be repeated as a sign of protest or simply because of meanness. Decide whether you are ready to tolerate such behavior and turn a blind eye to your chosen one’s communication with other women. If not, then it's better to break up.
When your husband is trying to lead a double life, bring him to a frank conversation. Find out who he wants to stay with and see if you can turn a blind eye to what happened. If you want to save your family, do not threaten, but give the right to choose.
After his wife cheated
Women often cheat on their husbands. But they usually repent and try to save the marriage. True, regaining the trust of your spouse is very difficult. If a woman cheated because she lacked attention and was worried about it, then there is no need to admit to wrongdoing. It will be very difficult for a man to forget his wife’s infidelity. Representatives of the stronger sex also feel betrayal acutely.
When your husband finds out about the betrayal, explain why you decided to take this step. Tell your chosen one that you consider him a generous person and count on understanding and forgiveness. If your husband is more valuable to you than your lover, do not deceive him anymore, as this will destroy the marriage. But when the spouse realizes that she loves another, it is better to get a divorce and find happiness in a new relationship.
