Counter attack
Impulsive women to whom life (or good people) have presented clear evidence of their husband’s betrayal are more often capable of betrayal. Sex can be provoked out of spite by finding a condom in your pocket, traces of lipstick and the smell of perfume that often adorns your husband’s things, or a purely anecdotal situation when you catch lovers in the act. At such moments, the offended spouse sees only her own humiliation and quite reasonably wants to cause no less pain to her loved one. But sex with a colleague or family friend who has long been hinting at a closer relationship will definitely not be a solution to the problem. Moreover, already on the second day the woman will strongly repent of what she did. After all, now she has become on the same level with her husband and has no right to make any claims to his fidelity (she herself is no better, it turns out). In addition, this further aggravates the problem in the family. It will be much more difficult to establish old relationships and return to your past life. Now the woman expects a desire to quickly wash away the traces of her vice, to forget and erase these moments from memory forever.
SOS, I cheated on my husband
Out of spite, out of resentment, out of love, or out of stupidity... But what difference does it make, in essence? It’s all over, you’re sitting on a crumpled sheet and you realize that you shouldn’t have done this at all.
Treason first
When he came home tired, hastily took off his clothes, throwing them into the washing machine in the bathroom, and went to bed, Anara didn’t notice anything special. He often returned tired. She headed to the bathroom, took out a shirt and trousers from the washing machine, and was taken aback. The collar of his shirt was stained with lipstick, it smelled of expensive women's perfume, and in his trouser pocket there was an open pack of condoms, although Nurlan never used any protection at home. Anara understood everything. On shaky legs, she left the bathroom, having first started the machine. She carefully placed the condoms into one of the inner pockets of his briefcase. She clenched her teeth and didn't say anything to him, and he didn't seem to notice that she was now aware. And in the evening she was late at work. A colleague who had been persistently seeking her attention for a year had finally waited in the wings. They went to his house, where she furiously, with all the anger and passion she had created, cheated on her husband out of spite.
She was sure that if she took revenge, things would become easier. But it didn't get any easier. On the contrary, she felt dirty. She felt disgusted with herself. But the deed had already been done and we had to live with it. Live, remembering that you cannot leave two children without a father.
Second betrayal
Anya fell in love. I fell in love like crazy. She glowed with happiness and did not notice anything around her. Her rose-colored glasses were so striking that her senior comrades tried to bring their colleague back to earth.
- Anyuta, you’re married. Be careful... Yes, your husband, of course, works too much, you miss him, but still, don’t rush headlong into the pool...
Andrei, Anya’s husband, has not paid much attention to her for a long time; all communication boiled down to “hello, bye for dinner, good night.” She yearned for male attention, she terribly lacked warmth and affection, and then HE appeared. Her new deputy boss. Oleg was a master at giving compliments, he was a clear favorite of women and did not suffer from attention deficit. Oleg noticed the “abandoned” beauty right away. Her eyes exuded such an amount of melancholy from loneliness that he, without thinking twice, invited her on a date. Then another one, and then another. Anya beamed with happiness and was already one hundred percent sure - this was the one she had been waiting for all her life, and her husband was her biggest mistake. The next date was at Oleg’s house. An elegantly laid table, pleasant music and scented candles. That evening Anya gave herself to her lover and they spent several delightful hours in bed. But when she returned home, she was not at all in a happy mood. The closer she was to home, the more hated Oleg became to her. And Andrei, with whom she had been so deeply offended all this time, began to seem like the best and dearest. There was a grocery store not far from her house. She came in and took a bottle of cognac. It’s good that tomorrow is Saturday and I don’t have to go to work. Anya spent the night in the kitchen, drinking cognac and thinking about how lousy it was to cheat on her husband. And falling in love... It vanished as if by hand.
Treason third
The class reunion was fun. First we sat in a cafe, then we went to karaoke, and then someone suggested we go to someone’s dacha. At that time, a decent amount of alcohol had already been drunk and the grown-up “schoolchildren” were already knee-deep in the sea. At the dacha, everyone scattered around the hut, someone went to heat the bathhouse, someone went into the cellar for wine, someone began to look at old photographs.
- Asel, look how beautiful we are here! - said a young man sitting next to him, - Our graduation, our whole life ahead... But you didn’t wait for me after studying in America...
“Well, okay, Ulan,” the girl laughed, “everything ended well anyway, you met Bermetka, you already have two cool kids.”
- Yes, but all these years I only loved you...
“Stop it, Ulik,” Asel was taken aback, “so much time has passed, I’m married, I have a daughter...”
But Ulan did not listen to Asel. The drink went to my head, which, due to passion, was already unable to think of anything. Within a minute, the clothes were lying lonely on the floor, and the couple was making love on the sofa.
...Breathing heavily after sex, Ulan asked:
- Now do you understand what you lost?
“I haven’t lost anything except self-respect,” Asel hastily collected things from the floor, “and I also realized that I’m an impenetrable fool.” And I can't drink. You, please don't call me anymore.
Asel returned home and hurriedly climbed into the bath. She frantically rubbed her body with a washcloth, knowing that now she would never wash herself off.
Three different women. Three different stories. And three identical states of mind at the end of what happened - how will I live with this? Should I tell my husband? How to forgive yourself?
Commentary by psychologist Leonid Sobolev
Adultery, or in other words “adultery,” is a very often raised topic with which people come to see me. Relationships, as I always say, are the work of both, this is painstaking work that should be carried out by both partners, and not just one of them. Yes, at first everything is perfect (I’m talking about the beginning of a relationship, when a couple is just starting to meet and romance is in the air even despite the heat or frost), but after some time everything goes back to normal and the most ordinary life begins, just like everyone around them has a family life with a lot of problems, sometimes scandals and misunderstandings, which are resolved in several ways:
1- they had a fight and, after some time, made up; 2- they began to look for something on the side, since the soul requires new emotions and sensations, and the current relationship began to bring only disappointment and boredom; 3-it turned out that a glass of wine in a cozy cafe with your colleague or friend, who had been listening to you for several hours about how your family life is a fiasco and you are so disappointed with it that you are confused and don’t know where and how to move on , and a little later, you realize that you are in someone else’s apartment and that you have just cheated on your own husband (or wife, if we talk about male infidelity). 4- and so on...
Only with effort and maximum effort will you be able to send your thoughts about betrayal to the farthest shelf of your consciousness, and this requires work on yourself and your thoughts. Firstly, this is a fact that has already happened and we, unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), do not have that magical time machine that could take us back. Alas and ah, but this is reality and it is necessary to come to terms with it and take it for granted. It is necessary to realize that any betrayal comes from the depths of the relationship itself and, often, dissatisfaction with family life leads one of the partners to begin to look for the very feelings that inspire and from which butterflies are felt in the stomach, on the side, so that early these feelings were already instilled in these relationships, but over time they simply subsided, or even went out completely.
Family/marital relationships are just as imperfect as the modern world. Sometimes it happens that a protracted quarrel with a spouse or gray everyday life pushes you to cheat. Sometimes, tired of family life and constant squabbles with her husband, a woman wants to diversify her life, fill it with thrills and passion. For this reason, the expression “I cheated on my husband” is heard more and more often. But very often, after the fact of betrayal, women do not know how to behave further and how to live with the idea that the permissible line has been passed.
In order to understand this burning issue, it is necessary to find out the reasons why the betrayal occurred. There can be many reasons. For example: your husband has completely forgotten how to care for his wife and you can only get flowers from him on his birthday; perhaps your spouse offended you in some way, which provoked a further step towards betrayal;
As practice shows, people tend to change after marriage and often the guy/man in front of you may be far from the one who once put a ring on your finger. Over time, your spouse may become nervous, rude, and lacking initiative. By determining the reasons for your betrayal, you can understand whether your betrayal was necessary in an isolated case or whether it will become cyclical.
The first question that arises after betrayal is “what should I do next?” Your task is to RELAX and determine for yourself whether you need a husband? Cheating on the part of a woman, most often, is not a desire for something new, but a desire for affection, warmth and care towards oneself, which are necessary for that very feeling of one’s own need for someone.
If it turns out that the betrayal that happened was a fatal mistake, and you are sure that you want to continue your relationship with your spouse, then you should forget about the betrayal and just remain silent. Men take it very hard to betray their spouse, for this reason you should not advertise it even if your first desire was repentance and a plea for forgiveness. You need to restrain your emotional impulses and think carefully about the current situation. Your confession may be a strong blow for your husband and he will not be able to forgive you for cheating, and then he will constantly suspect you of your infidelity, perhaps he himself will begin to cheat, or file for divorce. If you have decided to save your relationship, then you should forget this unpleasant incident and move on.
If you have decided to save your relationship, and the feelings after the betrayal are tormenting your conscience, then you need to make every effort to press the “delete” button in your head and completely erase the memories of that evening/incident. Try to get that “I cheated on my husband” phrase out of your head. You need to control your behavior and behave naturally, without being afraid to look your husband in the eyes, otherwise you will give yourself away.
If people can control their bodies, then they should also control their brains. Psychological methods will help here: in order to hide the betrayal, if your spouse begins to ask leading questions, you should convince yourself of your own innocence. When a person himself believes in what he says, no one will ever be able to catch him in a lie. Also, this technique will help you cope with emotional experiences. Imagine that that same betrayal is just your fantasy. After all, every person can imagine himself next to the person he liked, be it a singer or an actor.
Don't forget that remorse is a kind of time bomb that can easily blow up your relationship. I remind you that betrayal is always the fault of both parties, for this reason you should not engage in self-flagellation.
Remember that the fact itself is that betrayal is not a disaster and life does not end with betrayal. Any situation depends on how we react to it and how we treat it. Don’t force yourself to suffer from feelings of guilt and make the fact of betrayal seem enormous. This event is in the past, which should be left there, and not carried over from day to day in your head. It should be remembered that your glass, as always, is half full, for this reason, even in betrayal you should look for positive aspects.
1- Perhaps, after the betrayal, your spouse began to treat you completely differently and your marriage became stronger and happier; 2- Perhaps your spouse’s guesses or suspicions prompted him to think about how afraid he is of losing you; 3- There is a possibility that your betrayal was a consequence of past scandals and disagreements that evaporated after it; 4- Perhaps your spouse did not satisfy you sexually, which was the reason for your betrayal, and after all, you found the strength to raise this topic with your spouse and you were able to talk openly about what you are not entirely satisfied with and find together solution to this problem. No matter how it jars our ears and consciousness, betrayal can have a positive effect on relationships. Try to abstract yourself from your situation and look at it from a different angle. Teach yourself to notice something good that happened after that betrayal and perceive it as something that changed your relationship in a more positive direction.
I
do not recommend doing the following: 1-
You should not withdraw into yourself and your thoughts, sit by a broken trough and think about existence.
Your spouse can guess everything. 2-
You should not digest the nuances; in your eyes the running line will be the text “what should I do, what should I do now, because I cheated on my husband”
3-
You should not hide your eyes.
The eyes are the window to the soul and if you look away, it becomes clear that you have something to hide. 4-
You should not deny your spouse sex in the first days after cheating.
The fact of not having sex with your spouse will not make you innocent or less guilty, but your spouse may have suspicions. 5-
Destroy all “evidence” against you, both moral and physical.
6-
You shouldn’t keep this situation to yourself, let it go and don’t force yourself with thoughts about how you could have done this.
7-
You should not think about cheating. Erase betrayal from your memory and continue to live and enjoy life
Don't beat yourself up and don't blame your spouse for what happened. Think about what was the reason for the betrayal? What exactly are you missing in your relationship? How can you make your relationship happier and more sincere?
Lack of attention
How often in a marriage, especially a long-term one, partners forget that they need to take care of each other, try to do something pleasant, surprise them with surprises and work together on the relationship in order not to let the fire of love and passion that once united them into one family go out. A woman turns into a housewife and, with her eternal cooking, cooking, cleaning, and raising children, she completely forgets how she should look in order to excite her man. The head of the family, in the best case, is completely immersed in the process of making money, honestly getting tired at work and returning home to sleep off without any complaints from the other half. Or, at worst, he spends days on end lying on the couch, unfairly fired from work and unable to find a position worthy of such a specialist, always dissatisfied with everything, grumbling and digging into every little detail. Add here the husband’s frequent business trips, his meetings with friends in the bathhouse or fishing, and try to remember when this family man paid male attention to his wife. Never! So the gigolos from among the employees take advantage of this. Who, in order to solve some of their tasks and problems, easily compliment the offended beauty and are not averse to brightening up her boring life.
Drop dead macho men from dating sites can also offer their attention, love and sex, where women quietly look in, justifying themselves: “I’m just looking,” “I’m just going to chat...”. But such unloved ones are immediately identified by self-confident alpha males and offer to first meet, and later get to know each other more closely. And such a woman goes to the meeting, putting on makeup and trying to impress (she’s a woman!!!). And she hears a bunch of compliments that her husband never told her from a young age. He sees flowers and interest with desire in his eyes... And he agrees, forgetting at that moment about his responsibilities, principles, rules... And he decides to cheat... Only after... After cheating, you need to return home and behave like a decent person. Then, when the burden of betrayal already lies like a stone in the soul and conscience. There may be different options here too. Such adultery can help a woman understand herself. If she needs a husband and she values their family, she will have to look for ways to survive, forget, bury this ugly story deep in the recesses of her heart. Having managed to forget this and realizing her love for her husband, she will now do everything to change family relationships. Without talking about her wrongdoing, she will try to smooth out her guilt with increased attention, giving an abundance of love, sexuality and care. If, after betrayal, returning home seems like torture and punishment to a woman for another reason - tired of seeing indifference in her husband’s eyes, listening to his undeserved insults and indulging his every whim - she may well decide to leave such a marriage. And this will be, believe me, the right decision, giving two people a chance to try again to find their happiness.
How to regain understanding - instructions from psychologists
It only makes sense to work on restoring a relationship when a woman has respect for her man.
Perhaps this is the only and most important point that plays a role. Without respect, it is impossible to realize the depth of your guilt and repent.
Therefore, in order to maintain your dignity, you should not fall into scandals and grieve out loud in front of her. A frank conversation can help you.
What to talk about with your wife who cheated?
1. It is necessary to understand why this happened, why your woman took this action.
2. Perhaps you don’t fully understand the essence of a woman’s sexuality, how she gets excited, and what she needs to be satisfied. It may also be that your temperaments do not match or you do not listen to her wishes. And the other man simply found an approach to her.
3. Ask her what she wants. What questions can help you understand and begin to change?
“What is your idea of ideal sex?”
“What kind of porn turns you on?” (yes, girls also often watch, masturbate, extract some information from there and build their fantasies based on the scenes they watched).
“What is your wildest fantasy?”
4. Rarely do girls dream of some unbridled fantasies like swingers; usually they are limited to the light version of “50 Shades of Gray”. By the way, this is why the book and film blew up society and became so popular. They broadcast what girls have always been embarrassed to say out loud.
5. What concerns the secret desires of girls:
– long foreplay (up to 40 minutes);
- admiration for her;
– frequent tactile contact, hugs;
– clear dominance of men in everyday life;
– elements of mild aggression during intimacy.
6. Let her know that this situation is causing you pain. What is she willing to do to help?
7. Talk about how you both see your relationship moving forward.
Coincidence
In this scenario, betrayal most often occurs after a certain amount of drinking. A protracted corporate party, a meeting of classmates, a vacation in a sanatorium or on a business trip, where each new glass makes your interlocutors more and more interesting, and you more and more seductive. Long-buried coquetry awakens. And there... It’s not far from passionate sex. But such a story always ends badly for a woman’s psychological health. The next day there will be no need to scold her - she herself will choose all the known and unknown words that have been used to call harlots from ancient centuries to the present day. At the same time, her repentance will be completely sincere. And it is also quite possible that this will be the first and last betrayal in her life... At such a moment, it is better to immediately take as a starting point the fact that it is impossible to return anything back - what is done is done. Now you need to try to hide your mistake from your loved ones as much as possible, so as not to cause them unnecessary pain. This is very difficult to do, but if you redirect all your energy to creating ideal relationships in the house, then it is quite possible to forget about the unpleasant incident.
What to do if your wife falls in love with someone else?
When a woman falls in love, nothing you do will make sense. Because all her thoughts, actions and mood will be tied and directed towards another person.
Your attempts to bring her back, her former passion and understanding will only cause irritation. The best option in this case is to step aside and give her time.
Perhaps over time she will understand what and who she has lost and will want to return. But for this you need to be calm, confident, purposeful. Continue to develop and live, post photos of your new happy life on social networks.
She will definitely watch all this jealously. There is a high probability that at one point she will call and ask for everything back. There you can decide whether it is necessary or not.
Why is this happening? What was previously between you - love, affection, and other tender feelings did not disappear, but moved into the background. The new man eclipsed her consciousness for some time.
Constant Lover
It happens that a one-time betrayal develops into feelings and a long-term relationship. In this case we are already talking about a love triangle. And here it is also worth being aware of where you feel better and what is more valuable to you. Will your new partner be able to become the one and only for you for the rest of your life? Do you need to constantly return to a tired house? Is there any room here for the husband's pity? Is it necessary to save the family for the sake of children? As you can see, there are more questions than answers. But no one will give you the only solution. Each situation is special, and only by being personally in such a relationship can you compare and evaluate your life, your feelings and emotions, your desires and aspirations for an ideal family. It’s just that when you deceive your spouse, you must understand that he does not deserve such treatment. It is more honest and humane to break up on time, allowing him to also find his soul mate.
Divorce proceedings as a method of reconciliation
Sometimes you need to lose to realize how dear a relationship was to you. Divorce proceedings do not always mean the end of the story. Often, spouses realize what they have lost, so they begin to pursue their ex-husbands in order to make peace with them again.
There are couples who get divorced and then register their relationship again. You can take your time with re-registration, but simply live with your ex-wife so that she feels that you are not so easy to win. Here she will definitely be imbued with respect.
Exceptions to the rules
This includes stories of betrayal that are atypical for women. These are those who deliberately cheat and do not worry about the consequences:
- who openly goes to the left, explaining that the boyfriend or husband knows and supports such a free format of relationships;
- who does not value an alliance and a partner, but is simply looking for adventure - with any man he meets, a family friend, a taxi driver, etc.;
- who is a priori incapable of loyalty and, when escorted into the army, immediately warns: “my life - I do what I want”;
- who, purely from physiological aspects, is not able to go without sex for a long time (this is already a disease and a medical approach is needed).
As in the bearded joke, remember: - Honey, remember, no matter what, I have a bathhouse with friends on Wednesday and Friday. - OK, darling. And remember, no matter what, I have sex every day at 22.00...
We were together for 10 years__10
My boyfriend and I have been together to this day for 10 years. We have known each other since school. He is my first true love. Over the past 5 years, things have not gone as smoothly as I would like. At one point he began to allow himself to insult me, humiliate me, and raise his hand against me. He stopped talking to me about serious topics, often began to withdraw into himself, play a lot, and laugh it off when I started bringing up the topic of children and engagement.
I switched to plan 2 and that's putting it mildly. I stopped feeling loved and desired. There were complaints about everything: you don’t dress right, you don’t look right, you’re fat, you don’t cook well, you think stupidly, you can’t do anything yourself, you’re boring, etc. Why don't you talk to him seriously? Logical question. A banal answer. He can't hear me. Simply ignores or responds with aggression. He tells me to leave if something doesn’t suit me. How can I leave if I love?
I decided to endure until the end, to become ideal for him, to adapt to him and fulfill his every whim. My self-esteem has dropped to zero, although I am a fairly attractive, sociable girl and often catch the glances of passing guys. But everything has changed. Every day, the person closest to me spread rot on me more and more, and I myself began to see flaws in myself, pay attention to shortcomings and even look for them. I was broken, but I endured it because I loved. But, thank God, I didn’t have to endure and look for flaws in myself for long...
How to survive your betrayal
Let's still talk about women for whom cheating for the sake of cheating is not typical and who really suffer from their mistakes. How should they be? Is it necessary to tell the truth, repent and ask for forgiveness? And is it possible to save a family after betrayal? Any psychologist will give simple advice in such a situation: “If you can hide this fact, it is better not to talk about it.” A man, with all the ease with which he decides to commit adultery, absolutely cannot come to terms with his wife’s betrayal. In addition to love, feelings of ownership awaken in him, and this only aggravates the perception of the situation. In addition, he will not be able to forget such a truth and, if he does not remind you of what happened, then suspect you of all your sins for the rest of your life. There are two options for the development of events, but first the woman needs to decide for herself whether she needs her husband and whether she wants to save her family after that.
As you know, any betrayal is an offense for which both are to blame. This is confirmation that there are serious problems in the family. So maybe it’s better to let each other go in time, giving a second chance to build personal happiness. We also need to think carefully about this.
If something seems to you, then it doesn’t seem to you
You can theorize about who all women are after this as much as you like and think categorically. But when a person is faced with a real situation, his whole thinking is restructured. Well-established life, children. Melancholy, hopelessness, the desire to return everything to the way it was. This is probably one of the hardest blows a man can experience.
There are a number of signs by which treason can be identified. This is aloofness, and hiding the phone and a sudden desire to preen. But it happens that you have irrefutable evidence of betrayal or personal confession.
Sometimes it happens that a woman herself madly regrets what she did and wants to save her family. Many couples speak out, find a reason, express their grievances and... move on. The main thing is that you can no longer return to this topic. But this doesn't always happen.
Let's save the family
So, if a woman has thought about it and realized that she still loves her husband and wants to continue living with him under the same roof, then she must try to drive away all desires to confess. Go to church, to a psychologist - find a trusted person (preferably not one of your relatives and friends) who will simply listen to your excuses. Just speaking your own explanations out loud may be enough to calm you down a little and forgive yourself. If you are strongly inclined to tell the truth and only the truth, consider at least one wish: free your husband from the details of the process itself and do not force him to delve into the subtle nature of your emotional experiences. Don’t expect tears of understanding and words of support - you yourself know that you don’t deserve them... It’s better to silently and quietly deal with your vicious secret. Erase it from your memory and convince yourself that it simply didn’t happen. And direct your feelings of guilt in the right direction. To begin with, just talk to your husband frankly, telling him what exactly you are missing in your family relationship. Just give it out not in the form of ultimatums, but by calling your loved one to a frank conversation. Discuss together what has changed over the years of marriage, gently point out your desires and dreams, listen to his words and comments (most likely, considerable changes will be required from you). Try to surprise your husband with renewed feelings, organize a trip somewhere together, plan a vacation for two - show that he is important to you as a man, a beloved man. Only in this case, your one-time betrayal can cause not a breakup, but a strengthening of the family.
I met someone else
Under unusual circumstances, I met a man. They say it right, be in the right place at the right time. On this day, one might say, my whole life changed. I’ll tell you a little about him and how we met. I work as a consultant at a car dealership, and he just came in and looked at a couple of cars. I provided him with professional advice and we talked a little. He seemed very polite to me. Certainly! Compared to my boyfriend, any passerby will seem like a knight on a white horse. He asked me to find him on VK and add him as a friend.
From the first minute of communication, I felt his crazy masculine energy, charisma, and incredible aroma of perfume. This is the first guy, besides my boyfriend, who has driven me so crazy. We started talking all day long, about everything. I felt that I was very strongly drawn to him, I thought about him, I wanted him. But at the same time, I understood that I was not a free girl and tried to restrain myself, in the hope that these fleeting feelings would pass. I was of the opinion that, no matter what your man is and no matter how he treats you, you must be faithful to him to the last. I replayed these thoughts in my head every time that charming guy from the car dealership wrote to me. I delayed the date of our meeting as best I could...
We tear without regret
If betrayal brought a clear understanding that you and your husband are not on the same path and should not continue to suffer and torment each other, then you should simply file for divorce. It will be easier for you if you don’t be frank in the end and let your spouse know the true reasons for the separation. Let the reason for him and for those around him be a difference in views and hobbies, and not your move to the left. This way you will preserve both your name and your friendly relationship with your husband and his circle. You will not give him, offended and abandoned, a chance to slander you. In addition, if you feel guilty, try to present your decision to leave as gently as possible, thanking him in advance for his understanding and drawing pictures of his future happy life with his new chosen one... No one is immune from mistakes in life. But this is the essence of life: to learn the right lessons, to draw the right conclusions, having accidentally stumbled. It should also be noted that there are very few sinless people. So you shouldn’t zealously judge someone for their misdeeds, just as you shouldn’t bury yourself alive for something stupid you’ve done.
Cheating is a betrayal of a loved one. This is a rather low and disgusting act. But, if it has already happened, you need to make sure that: firstly, this situation never happens again, and secondly, use it to reassess your relationships in the family. If you really love your partner, then you will try to quickly forget this incident, making amends for your guilt with increased attention and sincere love. You cannot perceive betrayal as the end of life, and carry your cross of unforgiveness with your head down, taking all insults for granted and not hoping for happiness. In any case, two people are equally to blame for the fact that this happened in the family - husband and wife. One did not receive from the other what he hoped for when entering into marriage, and what could easily be obtained from others. Therefore, all psychologists strongly recommend that all women, at the slightest dissatisfaction with their partner in any area of life, try to prevent their betrayal. Call your husband or boyfriend for frank conversations, honestly say what doesn’t suit you, and go together to seek support from specialists. All this will be possible with mutual interest in preserving the union. If you see a protest from your husband and his reluctance to hear you, then it is better to leave immediately, without unnecessary mistakes and betrayals, freely going in search of your man.
After all, in the end, everyone has the right to choose and everyone has the right to be happy!
Help from specialists
If you love each other and strive to save your marriage, but constant quarrels do not allow passions to subside, then it would be better to visit a family psychologist to resolve conflicts and bring you to a common decision.
To understand your woman and find common ground in your intimate life, you can go as a couple to see a sex therapist (not to be confused with a sex therapist - he solves problems with potency, contraception, and deviations from developmental norms).
In our country, this type of problem solving is gaining increasing popularity. In any case, it will be better than venting to friends or family, who will then remember this situation for the rest of their lives.
