Category: Communication and influence
In this article I will tell you how to motivate your man. What types of motivation are there and how to skillfully use them so that a man works, develops and invests in your family. I will give you step-by-step instructions, using which you will understand how you can motivate a man to grow and develop. And also, I will tell you about tips that may hinder you. As a result, you will have an understanding of how to make a man motivated to develop and improve the well-being of your family.
Remember!
You can't make a rose bush grow faster even if you pull it up by its branches. Only if you regularly water the bush, carefully trim dry branches, remove parasites from the leaves, and protect them from the scorching rays of the sun, can you expect lush flowering.
Success is like a rose growing in a garden; it must be cultivated with patience and persistence. And it is better to use techniques and methods that are adequate to the expected result.
Types of motivation
If you've ever wondered: how to motivate a man to have a successful career, help around the house, a healthy lifestyle, a feat in the name of a beautiful lady? Then our article is for you. Let's see what types of motivation exist that can act as an incentive for development and growth.
The first source of motivation is fear.
Authoritarian leaders and dictators play well on human fears. They quickly learned that intimidating a person can force him to perform the desired actions. Men skillfully use this motive in relationships. They intimidate and remind women of their age and fading youth.
“Who will need you, at thirty-five and with two children?”
Women are not far behind either. If they feel that a man is very attached or in love, they give ultimatums.
“Either you change jobs, look for an additional source of income, or we break up.”
Sometimes you can motivate yourself to succeed in such a dubious way.
The second source of motivation is a sense of duty.
From childhood we were taught that a man should be the breadwinner, and a woman should be the keeper of the hearth. Therefore, we are very easy to manipulate using fairly standard statements:
“You should earn more money because your second child is coming soon.”
Many people in relationships put pressure on a sense of duty and get their way, forcing their partner to perform certain actions that they consider necessary for the interests of the family. This method works, but is ineffective.
The third source is identifying the partner’s needs and meeting them
This method is more effective and humane. You study your partner's needs and give hope for a certain gain. What, besides material goods, can act as a prize?
- Tasty food.
- Space sex.
- Attending a football match together.
- Increasing social status, career growth, fame.
- Peace of mind in the family.
- Opportunity to engage in hobbies.
Each relationship is individual, but the mechanism of action of the message is the same: if you do this, you will receive this benefit, life will become more pleasant and richer. As a result, both partners will be satisfied. Therefore, it is worth learning this method and putting it into practice.
The fourth, highest level of motivation is love.
Psychologists call love the most effective and efficient way of motivation. With age, passions subside, love turns into the form of mutual acceptance, tenderness, openness and respect for each other.
When a man feels that the energy of love emanates from a woman, his wings spread, strength and incentive appear to move forward to new heights.
Love is a fairly effective factor. The stronger your love, the greater the unconditional acceptance of your partner (without setting conditions and presenting bills), the more powerful the energy that gives a man the ability to act, open new horizons, and reach steep peaks.
Only in this case will he be ready for exploits, and the result of his achievements will surely fall at your feet.
Step-by-step instructions: how to properly motivate a man
Answer honestly the question of who is more interested in moving towards success. Those who need it should change. Since you are reading this article, then you will have to work on yourself.
A woman can create herself as the muse for whom a man is ready to perform feats, become successful and rich.
When next to a man there is a woman who believes, remembers his merits and abilities, trusts him, and shows readiness to support him in the most difficult situation, then the man is much more likely to succeed and will believe in his own success.
Please note:
failure is just part of success. You must understand that if a man wants to achieve great heights, he will have to endure serious stress, losses, and falls.
On the path of self-development, you will have to learn new skills and actions:
- Do not devalue ideas, but discuss them
. Show genuine attention rather than curiosity. Don't control a man, don't bring fuss into his life. On the contrary, trust your man (you will succeed, you are smart enough). And say goodbye to worries and uncertainty. - Don't run ahead of the locomotive
. You should not offer your help. There is no need to get a second job and work like an ox. You shouldn't compete with a man. It will end like this: “Where would you be without me?” This clearly shows pride and rivalry. - Learn to believe in your man
. Often an abundance of compliments and active acceptance hides a lack of faith. Monitor your thoughts, change them. Do I want to be the woman who believes in him? Imaginary and true faith in man. Notice the strengths of your man, do not attach importance to his mistakes. Think more about your merits, build the image of a successful person in your mind brick by brick. - Calmness and trust
. Not only to the man, but also to the Universe. When a woman is in a feminine state, a man is more easily inspired to succeed. - Calm your wild imagination
. Stop worrying and worrying. Stop scrolling through scary pictures in your imagination: you are left alone, in debt, etc., - Don't be afraid of your man's success
. What will happen if he earns not $2,000, but $20,000 a month. This is a different power, a different energy. Develop yourself. Fill yourself with different content. - Pamper and love yourself
. Let a man pamper you, spend money on you. Accept signs of attention with gratitude, do not chop off your wings. Get used to luxury and abundance. Remove the fear of money. Do not refuse a man's desire to give you luxurious gifts. - Live with pleasure
. Enjoy bad weather and delicious food. Charge your man with your own positivity. - Thank your man
. For his help, for being there, for gifts and attention.
The path of change is long and thorny, so don’t rush to push a man to change right now, don’t rush things. Give the man a month, six months, a year or two to realize the changes and make a decision. This is the last, tenth item on our list.
Watch a short video on how to make a man miss you. This video talks about an idea that will help you better motivate men:
How to get your husband to work and earn money
For men, it is difficult to believe in motivation, because everyone believes that they are able to achieve everything on their own. Whether we like it or not, we have to admit that without women, many would not have succeeded. Motivation helps not only in earning money, but also in achieving other goals.
Basic rules for motivating a man to earn and bring home money:
- Never humiliate your loved one. Men need approval for even the most insignificant actions; praise him more often, talk about your love, and emphasize his virtues.
- If you give ultimatums and call a man names, be prepared for the fact that he will never budge. Many men cannot withstand too persistent pressure and look for a less demanding woman. Also, your negative attitude will push him away.
- Some ladies are overly protective of their men, which is reminiscent of maternal care. You don’t want to strain yourself with such women, because they themselves cope well with men’s responsibilities.
In families where love and mutual respect reign, a man feels the need to make his woman happy.
As a representative of the strong half of humanity, I will tell you about the features that motivate men to earn money . You need to understand that men have their own internal motivation.
And therefore it is necessary to take into account the following points:
- Men always have a plan, even if you don't know anything about it. Become a muse for your loved one, perhaps he will share his plans with you.
- Don't confuse motivation with inspiration. The first motivates action, while the second is an external factor.
- A wise woman can become an inspiration for a man, motivating him to take action.
- Motivation works when your desires and the man’s aspirations coincide.
- Don't rely on hints. Women who resort to such tricks know that hints do not work; men simply do not understand them.
Tips that don't work
Women's magazines are full of advice on how to inspire a man to have a successful career, how to get him to go to the gym, how to persuade him to get off the couch.
Women begin to act decisively, but for some reason men withdraw into themselves, do not want to be frank, share their thoughts and experiences. Why does this happen? Let's look at three popular tips through the prism of knowledge about types of motivation.
“Advice” first
In the presence of a man, call your mother or girlfriend, complain about your difficult financial situation, tell them that you don’t have enough money to buy a refrigerator or a trip to Switzerland. Children want to visit the entertainment center, but you haven’t been to the salon for a month. Perhaps, having heard your conversations, he will think and begin to act.
Why doesn't this work?
The method is absolutely not viable. None of the motifs are included here. Your endless chatter and whining into the phone will only anger the man. He will withdraw even more into himself and move away from you.
How to proceed.
Try to spend less time talking on the phone. And if you already called, then tell your mother, yours and his, what a great guy he is. Yesterday I nailed a shelf in the kitchen.
Today you placed decorative plates on it that you brought from Morocco. And on the weekend you are waiting for guests to demonstrate the updated kitchen. Satisfy your man's need for recognition and approval.
“Advice” second
Motivate a man to take action through children. Parents always wish their children all the best. So that they do not suffer from lack of money, lack of food, toys or seaside holidays
. Therefore, casually mention your baby’s dream. Let the father think about where to get money to make his child happy.
Why doesn't this work?
This advice is ineffective because it is based on pressure on a sense of duty and manipulation of children. Instead of the expected effect, you will most likely receive aggression in response.
A man will simply begin to accumulate resentment, anger and irritation inside. This will result in quarrels and family scandals with tears and mutual reproaches.
How to proceed.
Try to manipulate a man less. Offer to consider the options together, the benefits of each decision. Let him make the final decision on his own: send the child to the village with his grandmother for the summer or buy a ticket to a children's camp in Spain. After all, he is the master of the house, an accomplished adult man.
“Advice” third
Every woman dreams of walking arm in arm with a dizzying handsome man so that all her girlfriends will be jealous. How to motivate a man to play sports and go to the gym? Accidentally leave a magazine with fit handsome men on the table. After leafing through the publication, your man may feel jealous, think about it, and start working on his own figure to arouse your admiration.
Why doesn't this work?
The feeling of jealousy is unproductive in nature, causing anger and unmotivated aggression. The advice is based on the ineffective motive of fear that you will leave him.
How to proceed.
Take care of yourself, your figure. Start visiting a fitness center. When the first results appear, share your joy with your partner, tell him that you really want to be slim and fit next to him. So that together you look like a harmonious, beautiful couple.
All recommendations are based on the motive of satisfying the needs of the partner. To bring the highest level of motivation to work, check if there is love in your relationship.
Watch the video “How to find out whether a man loves you or not. Nine signs." The video presents a convenient checklist of 9 questions. By answering them honestly, you will understand whether it is worth working on your relationship and moving towards success, or whether it is better for you to break up and look for new partners.
Answers on questions
How to motivate my man to give gifts?
For a man to start generously giving you gifts, learn to receive gifts with gratitude. When accepting flowers, a box of chocolates or a souvenir, express positive emotions and show good humor. A man will subconsciously remember the emotional reaction, feel significant, and he will want to experience this state again.
How to motivate him to marry me?
Let's start with an important note: a man must make the decision to marry HIMSELF. Remember the paradox that a woman’s strength is in her weakness and become for him the woman he wants to protect from life’s adversities. Think about the main female roles and try to change them periodically. Be either a caring mother, an ardent lover, or a devoted friend.
How to get a man to get off the couch and start working for the good of the family?
The advice is simple: do not scold or reproach a man. It’s better to ask him to get a job and find an effective incentive. Buying new things for him and paying for a swimming pool for the kid probably won't work. But a new spinning rod for an avid fisherman or the purchase of a new SUV for a car enthusiast may well become an effective bait.
What is it for?
The main task of a woman in a couple is not just to recognize the potential in a man, but also to show it to her lover.
Motivation aimed at creating personality allows you to “energize” a representative of the stronger sex for new sporting, professional, financial, intellectual, spiritual and personal exploits.
Thanks to motivation, a wife/girlfriend can get what she wants from her chosen one, but do it very gracefully and beautifully . A man will be fired up with a goal and will go ahead of his own free will, and not at the behest of his companion.
