Find your purpose, find your calling

0 2720 August 4, 2020 at 07:46 pm Author of the publication: Yanina Burakova

It is impossible to experience the fullness of life if you feel out of place. If it seems that you could bring something vital, grandiose into this world... but you don’t know how to find your calling. There is potential, but it seems that this valuable resource is being wasted on some nonsense. Or your whole life is subordinated to a constant search for your place. Over and over again - not the same.

The request is not a joke! It can arise both on the eve of retirement and at the very beginning of adult life. And even suddenly, at 30 or 40 years old, when everything seems to be going well.

An understandable question, not a difficult answer, but... Today, beliefs in vocation or destiny are formed by analogy with the eternal search for one’s only half. Questions devalued by frequent mention on any occasion - how to find a soul mate, your calling, the meaning of life - have been equated with yellow headlines in the tabloid press. A correct thought has been twisted to the point where it is completely impossible to apply it to any benefit.

Don't look for your purpose in life

Sometimes we engage in endless soul-searching, searching for the right path in life or an unattainable ideal. We become entangled in desires, meaningless self-analysis, negative experiences, missed opportunities and wasted time. But the more you chase something, the more unattainable and impossible it becomes.

Often we make some goal our dream and even our life purpose. But the dream is unattainable, unrealistic and unfulfillable. It is difficult to achieve the life you dreamed of or saw in a Hollywood movie. As a result, you lose motivation, the desire to fight and give up.

Soviet actress Faina Ranevskaya said: “Everything will come true, you just need to stop wanting.” Don't look for your purpose in life, forget about ridiculous dreams and don't look for your destiny. There is no one right way where you will be happy. You can be happy anywhere and anytime.

What are you waiting for all the time?

You can make no mistakes and do only the right things, but still be unhappy. You can do everything right, but still not feel harmony and not enjoy life. The self-satisfaction of finding your unique calling and purpose is a myth. Purpose is an unattainable ideal that we have come up with for ourselves.

There is no need to give up anything, make extra efforts or choose a particular path. Don't look for your purpose in life, but let it go. The more you chase your purpose, ideal and dream, the further away they become from you. Austrian psychiatrist and psychologist Viktor Emil Frankl said: “Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you catch it, the more it slips away. But if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit quietly on your shoulder.” Let go and don't try to control everything, and then see what happens.

Daniel Lincoln, Unsplash

Life calling - how to determine it?

Source: lyved.com/body_soul/ Translation: Balezin Dmitry

Understanding your purpose in life , understanding why you appeared on Earth, can sometimes be as difficult as putting together a puzzle, the particles of which are scattered all over the world. Some people never put this puzzle together into a single picture, because they often lack patience and desire. Or perhaps they are too afraid of this...

However, the five pieces of the puzzle called “my purpose in life” that you need to complete the whole picture are quite easy to find.

These are the components that need to be put together

Identify your talents and passions

This is probably the simplest and most common way to determine your calling in life. So start there.

Following your talents and passions will lead you to satisfaction, happiness, and even allow you to earn a living (and possibly much more). It doesn't matter whether your talent is innate or acquired. You have a talent and it was given to you for a purpose.

To discover your talent and discover your passions, consider the following:

• What makes you cry with joy? • What makes you smile? • What do other people honestly say you are good at? • What makes you laugh? • What keeps you up all night because you just can't stop?

Look into your past

Sometimes it can be difficult to remember your past. There are many such events that I would like to erase from my memory. However, that would be stupid. Instead, we must use our past to move forward to make sense of our present situation.

Looking into your past, with an attempt to determine your purpose, also consists of some pieces of the puzzle:

In what circumstances were you born? Perhaps you were born into poverty. Then your mission could be to get out of poverty and lead others out of it, by example.

What were the main mistakes your parents made? What negative character traits did they struggle with?

Were they abusive, perhaps addicted to alcohol, or involved in any other destructive behavior patterns? If so, then your goal may be to break this vicious cycle (not continue it). You must break with this and become an example for others.

What endeavor have you failed at?

Failure or failure should not become something permanent for you. They only exist to separate those who really want something from others. If a certain failure affects you so much, then your calling in life is to get back “in the game” and, using a new approach, win this time.

Who influenced you the most (in a positive way)?

Was he/she your teacher? An actor? By the author? Director? President? Local hero? If they changed your life, then perhaps you should continue their mission?

There are three callings that unite us all

1. Be as happy as possible; 2. Live the way you want; 3. Change the lives of other people; 4. Leave behind a world a little better than what it was when we were born.

And I say “yes” to all those negatively minded people... Yes, not everyone realizes these callings, but everyone could.

Be open to multiple destinations

Many of us have several purposes in life, but often we still have one main life mission and several smaller reasons for existence. Someone's calling may be to be a great parent, but they can also change the world in their own way.

However, it also happens that several purposes merge into one, more significant one. I was often told that I was good at writing and that I should think about turning this ability into a career, but I constantly “denied” it. However, one of my desires has always been to change the world. So one day, I just decided to combine the two and change the world through my writing.

Our vocation may also depend very much on our age. Usually, our goals are very materialistic when we are young, but they stop being so when we get older.

All this leads me to think about the fifth piece of the puzzle.

Find out what your calling is TODAY

What is the purpose of your being on Earth today is much more important than the purpose that you must achieve later in your life. Today is guaranteed, tomorrow not.

If you believe that your calling is to share your creativity with others, then get started today! If you feel like you should be an entrepreneur, then get started today! Perhaps you will find something that will give meaning to your life until the very end.

We wait for the perfect moment, but it doesn't exist. Concentrate on your calling today... tomorrow, next month, at the very latest next year. Life flows now, not tomorrow.

Live every day and take action

How to find your calling in life that seems elusive? There's no point in pretending to be happy with everything when you're not. Be dissatisfied and inquisitive, but active. Being honest with yourself allows you to fight for your future by moving forward rather than trying to come to terms with what is happening.

We want to find our purpose in life and then start doing something for fulfillment. But destination is not a goal, but the road and movement itself. Start doing something fun, and don’t engage in endless soul-searching and don’t be content with what you have.

We spend our entire lives putting everything off until later. The weekend will come, a long-awaited vacation, a promotion, a lucky moment and a desired pension. Now, if there is a good situation and ideal conditions, then I will do it. Stop. Putting everything off until later is the worst habit called procrastination. Postponing even important and necessary things until later, you will never be happy.

Self-confidence test. Life treats you the way you want it

We push our plans further and further and do nothing more. Sometime later? Will you do everything and achieve it as soon as all the stars align? It doesn't happen that way. The more you stand still, the more you become rooted in a life that doesn’t suit you. You grow into a swamp that gradually absorbs you.

Don't put off until tomorrow what you can do today. Start doing something fun, important and necessary today. Tomorrow does not exist, but today exists every day. Start doing something interesting, unusual, exciting and curious every day. It doesn't matter at all what it will be. It is important to motivate yourself to move at least minimally.

Nathan Dumlao, Unsplash

Vocation - as an inner attraction

The most effective recommendation on how to find your calling, your favorite job or hobby that generates income, is to listen to your desires, remember what you loved in childhood, what you dreamed of becoming. But the method doesn't work. What's the use of remembering how you dreamed of becoming an astronaut?

But let's be honest. When a person develops correctly, acquires from childhood the skills to realize his natural properties in society, he does not have the problem of finding a calling. He succeeds in everything. Because he naturally goes in the direction where his inner need “calls” him and where he can most fully demonstrate his talents.

He is happy and clearly successful. We say: he was lucky to find his calling - and we are a little jealous.

Vocation is not something you need to look for. It is built in by default into our basic set of desires and mental properties set from birth.

But why not everyone is able to hear the call of the heart, few will tell you outside of Yuri Burlan’s “System-Vector Psychology” training. That is why, instead of a simple recipe on how to find long-awaited happiness, we talk so much about the reasons why all this does not work out.

It’s much easier to reach your goal if you know exactly what’s in your backpack and what you need to get rid of along the way. Otherwise, how can we acquire something new when we are dragging a heavy load of fears, grievances, and bad experiences. It's a shame to throw something away. Memory! Something might come in handy...

What have you managed to accumulate?

Find new hobbies and interests

Your calling in life does not have to be related to hobbies or passions. But the search for your desires needs to start here. What do you like to do? What do you want to do? What is your soul about? Maybe work as someone else? Maybe start another hobby? Maybe try something new and unusual?

Get rid of tunnel thinking and vision of life. Stop thinking and acting in patterns that only limit your potential. Expand your range of interests, interests, and hobbies. Try everything that seems potentially interesting. Often we thoughtlessly dismiss things that later turn out to be to our liking. Don't be afraid to try something you haven't looked at yet.

Give yourself six months or a year for research. This will be an interesting way of meeting new people, new hobbies, new professions, new opportunities. Expand your spheres and circles of knowledge. This method will help you get out of narrow thinking and vision of your life situation. This method will develop a more expansive outlook on life. You will be like a cosmopolitan who sees the world from above.

How to achieve what you want faster? Do a little more than usual

Shifaaz Shamoon, Unsplash

Find your life purpose

How to find your life calling and purpose? You don't need to set a single goal in life, but rather find multiple ways to achieve greater self-realization. Take a piece of paper and write down everything you want to do in life and what to do. Let it be a list of 20 or 100 items. Describe your life the way you imagine it.

What are your real interests?
What do you want to do now?
What are you most passionate about?
What hobbies make you happy?
Where do you want to be in 5 or 10 years?
What are your goals?
What does your life plan look like?
What are your dreams?

Go through the list and then rank all your dreams in order of priority. Draw a wish map that will contain all your puzzles that make up your life purpose and desired dreams. Sometimes dreams seem impossible and difficult, but that’s okay. It is important to hit the road, and opportunities will appear at the next turn of fate. The main thing is to get involved in a fight, and then we will see.

Jonathan Borba, Unsplash

How to find a calling

To determine your vocation, I suggest using two interrelated exercises. There are many methods that allow you to get to know yourself better and decide on a profession, but these, in my opinion, are the most effective, concise and multifunctional.

Self-portrait

Conduct a written analysis, search for common ground of interests, skills, abilities, character. How to do it:

write down 20 striking traits of your character, strengths;
write down 20 things you love to do;
write down 20 points of what you can do or what you can learn if you wish.

Analyze the results, write down several professions in which you can try yourself. For example, you love to be the center of attention, you have a loud voice, and you know how to attract and win over people. Perhaps you should take a vocal course and try yourself in this area. They say that anyone can be taught to sing. But not all people are endowed with a strong voice.

Portrait of a profession

Describe in detail your preferred employment: schedule, working hours, weekends, responsibilities. The more points you write, the better. It is important to know not only your own characteristics, but also to know what exactly you are looking for, what kind of job you dream of. Don’t forget to ask yourself questions: “Why do I need this job?”, “What do I want and can give to society?”

See if there are any overlapping positions in the results of the first and second tasks. If in doubt, contact someone you trust. The more independent experts you involve, the better.

Go into the zone of uncertainty

Have you found your purpose, set your direction, and then take action? But that doesn’t happen in life. Self-realization in life is not a straight line, but an unknown curve, with many branches.

The comfort zone is where we have spent the last few years. It’s familiar here, comfortable, but dreary. Your task is to get ready and step out of your comfort zone into the zone of uncertainty. It's scary, unusual and a little dangerous. But it is interesting, exciting, exciting and unforgettable. Go into the zone of uncertainty. There you will have to get used to the fact that a state of uncertainty is not only scary, but also promising.

Nathan Dumlao, Unsplash

Get rid of excess

Are you going on a long journey that is unknown, but that’s why it’s beautiful? How to find your calling in life? Move forward, throwing away everything that interferes. Often we are deprived of opportunities not by difficulties, but by habits, comfort, loved ones and friends. The most dangerous enemies are not those who are closest to us. Get rid of friends who drag you back. Get rid of toxic people who put a spoke in your wheels and don’t want to see your victories. You will feel how it will become easier to breathe and move without people who pull you to the bottom.

How to stop whining and complaining about life?

Get rid of the unnecessary, the empty, the insignificant and the holding back. House clutter, unnecessary things, excess items and consumerism. Clear out all the clutter from your desk and throw any unwanted items into the attic. The house will become freer, cleaner and more spacious.

Asceticism is better than excess, which only brings dependence on things. This is how artists, poets, writers, directors and actors who create best are poor. Asceticism allows you to remove unnecessary things when nothing prevents you from looking forward. Free up space around for more freedom.

Gustavo Torres, Unsplash

Summary of thoughts

At the beginning of our article, we said that we are unlikely to be able to offer a ready-made method for finding your purpose. And this is true, because finding a calling is a purely individual matter, even to some extent intimate. There are no templates or techniques that you can simply follow and everything will be resolved, as if by magic.

But we still think that our reflections on the meaning of life and happiness can guide your thoughts (and future actions) in the right direction. To understand what you need, note those moments when you get a feeling of harmony, peace and that everything is fine.

You can sit in the office for years, and one day, succumbing to the persuasion of a friend, forcefully jump with a parachute and realize that this is what you have dreamed of all your life. You can throw boxes in a warehouse, and one fine day, out of nothing to do, write a short story and realize that this is exactly what you wanted to do since childhood. You can go on vacation and, while lying on the beach, come up with the idea of working remotely in order to be able to explore the world, and, ultimately, come up with website design.

In general, the answer to the question of how to find your purpose is, among other things, to have the courage and audacity to follow the call of your desires and dreams; to give free rein to your imagination; is to understand that your happiness is in your hands. Study yourself, identify your deepest needs, communicate with purposeful and passionate people, expand your own boundaries, reflect on life, try new things, spend time on what is important to you, what you like, and do not indulge your weaknesses and habits. This is what will allow you to find your calling.

And, of course, we simply cannot help but recommend you a couple of books on this topic. This is the book “Set Goals! Find your goal and achieve it in 1 year” (Ichak Pintosevich) and “Find your calling. How to discover your true talents and fill your life with meaning" (Ken Robinson). And also watch this video from Ken Robinson, where this amazing man talks about calling and its meaning.

We sincerely hope that our short philosophical and analytical essay has clarified some points for you about finding your calling, and you will be able to find something you like, your favorite job or life’s work. We wish you good luck and loyalty to yourself!

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Key words:1Self-knowledge

Find like-minded people and loved ones

The world is a big place, and in good company you can handle any road. Look for like-minded people, friends and people with whom you feel good. Look for those who support you, have similar ideas and strive for more. Find yourself a loved one with whom you will feel good in every sense of the word.

Collect your loved ones bit by bit. Look for them in new places where you have never been. Make people your friends and make an effort to maintain relationships. Friendship and love take time. Don't be afraid to take the time to call, write, or meet with people. If you don't make an effort, friendships or relationships can wither. But even if you do everything right, your friends or significant other may leave.

It's OK. There are many people in the world who will gladly keep you company in a partnership, friendship or relationship. These people are also searching, suffering and struggling. The main thing is not to give up. After all, if you give up, then you lose. Continue the game no matter what happens around you. Play in such a way that people admire your toughness, strength and tenacity. Look for love and friendship.

Nathan Dumlao, Unsplash