How to stop swearing at a girl or guy: tips, reviews. How to learn to talk without swearing?

Foul language is a dubious habit that can fail you at any moment. Alas, swear words still pop up in conversations at work or when communicating with friends. They are also a reaction to unexpected situations. Surely you have had to blush more than once in front of others because you cursed at the wrong moment.

How to unlearn swearing and speak beautifully

This is not as easy to do as it might seem. This has already become a habit, and giving up swearing is not easy, but we will help you with this. If you continue to use bad words in conversation, people will not take you seriously, which will affect your reputation.

Replace curse words with other words. At first it will be difficult for you to limit yourself, so we advise you to replace swearing with any other word that you like. It could be a simple “Oh God” or “For God’s sake.” You can also come up with something more original, it all depends on your imagination. For example, instead of the word “shit,” say the word “sugar.” It will be difficult for you at first, but after a few days it will become a habit.

Elastic band on the wrist. Put a tight rubber band on your hand and every time you use swear words in a conversation, pull it in the other direction and let go. It will hurt you, but this is the only way you can eliminate this habit. Pain is a good helper, remember this.

Money. This method has helped many; it is one of the most effective. After each swear word you will have to pay a fine, set the amount yourself. Put all your money in a jar or piggy bank, and then spend it not on yourself, but on charity. The fine should be decent so that you don’t have the desire to swear.

Calm down. Most people use swear words when they are angry. If an unexpected situation arises, you involuntarily swear again, but you can’t do that. Try to control your emotions and calm down.

Stop yourself mid-sentence. And yet you could not resist and began to say this very word... Stop! Stop halfway and shut up! Don't say it completely, try to control yourself.

Become an optimist. Are you tired of seeing only the negative in any event? Try to think positively, don’t make a problem out of little things and cheer yourself up. You’ll see, by changing your outlook on life, you will begin to swear less.

Support from loved ones. Tell your friends and family that you want to quit a bad habit. They will help you and control you in conversation, thanks to the help of strangers you will be able to control yourself.

Present. Promise yourself a present if you don’t use swear words for a week or a month. The gift must be valuable, otherwise you will have no incentive to work on yourself.

Imagine what you look like from the outside. You need to imagine yourself from the outside, it is unlikely that you will be pleased to watch this. Why should other people listen to your curse words? As a result, you will lose all your friends and acquaintances.

Surround yourself with positive people. Much depends on your environment; if you communicate with people who constantly argue, it will be difficult to get rid of the habit. You need to change your environment - communicate with intelligent people.

We want to tell you right away that it will not be easy to stop swearing, but with a great desire it is quite possible. All in your hands!

How to stop swearing: video tips

Who will win?

Swear words are unusually tenacious, like cockroaches, the unsuccessful fight against which lasts for millennia. Despite drastic measures aimed at combating them, their use has not decreased.

On July 1, 2014, a law came into force in Russia that prohibited the use of profanity in public places, in particular on television and radio, during the public performance of works of art and in film distribution. This process is controlled by Rospotrebnadzor, which imposes fines on offenders - both ordinary citizens and officials and legal entities.

But, as you know, it is the forbidden fruit that is sweet. “When something is prohibited, you want it even more,” “... the temptation is stronger, the stricter the ban,” wrote the classics. So it is unlikely that the amendments to the law “On the State Language”, designed to protect the population from swearing, will play a significant, or even any, role in the fight against foul language. Unless they will allow some replenishment of the treasury through fines.

The jokers proposed their own version of combating profanity, namely: replacing swear words and expressions with cultural ones that carry exactly the same semantic load. For example:

stuck - you are too annoying;
oh...is it? - your behavior does not meet my expectations;
went to... - don’t distract me, I’m busy;
we missed it - it seems we didn’t take something into account;
don’t piss—don’t say nonsense (nonsense);
spiz...li - someone took something that was lying badly.

And so on.

Do they have the right to be?

However, the expressions offered in return, even as a joke, do not at all convey the expression with which swear words are sounded. And, naturally, they do not penetrate the soul of the person for whom they are intended, and do not achieve the goal. It turns out that there is some benefit from swear words?

Military historians made an interesting conclusion when analyzing the events of World War II: the Japanese often lost battles to the Americans only because they were slower to give commands, and therefore to make decisions. This was because in Japanese the length of a word on average is 10.8 characters, while in Americans it is 5.2.

In Russian, the average word length is 7.2 words, but in critical situations no one gives commands, for example, as follows: “I order the 15th to immediately open fire on the enemy tank on the right, which is firing at our positions!” Artillerymen, and not only others, switch to profanity, replacing an entire phrase with one word, and reducing words to 3.2 characters. As a result, the above phrase sounds like this: “15th, f... on this x... on the right!” And the outcome of a battle often depends on the speed of issuing an order.

Psychologists also say that one should not be so categorical about swearing and consider people who resort to it as vulgar. True, they make a reservation that profanity must be used correctly, wisely, and then words called swear words can even be useful.

In addition, they came to the conclusion that lovers of strong words are not necessarily narrow-minded people who seek to humiliate and insult someone. And even vice versa: people who use profanity are honest, emotional, expressive and have high verbal intelligence. This is according to scientists from the USA, Great Britain, China and the Netherlands, who, in the course of joint research, interviewed almost 300 volunteers and analyzed notes and comments from users of social networks, in particular Facebook.

One of the researchers even stated that the more prone a person is to using foul language, the higher the level of his verbal intelligence: since he uses taboo words fluently and understands how and when to use them, it means that he handles the words of others in the same way. categories. With his research, he refutes the idea that swearing is used by people with a poor vocabulary.

In addition, observations of the behavior of volunteers showed that swear words uttered at critical moments increase the level of adrenaline in the blood, raise the pain threshold and dull fear.

Thus, it was concluded that the use of obscene words where appropriate should be considered not a deviation, but a norm, which means there is no point in banning them.

“To succeed in life, it’s better not to swear,” noted some folk poet.

And at the same time, there is an opposite opinion: swearing humiliates and insults others. It testifies to the low personal culture of the foul-mouthed person. Swear words are charged with negativity, which spreads to all people forced to listen to it.

Since a person lives in society, he needs to take into account those who surround him. And if swearing hurts their ears, then they need to get rid of the habit of expressing their emotions using swear words.

It is also not acceptable when communicating with children: they quickly adopt bad habits. At first, some parents are touched by a child who, lisping, repeats a “bad” word, then they are surprised where he picked up such a thing, then they are indignant and forbid it, forgetting that most often they themselves are the “teachers”.

Why do people swear

It is absurd to talk about the lack of education of modern people. Now more than ever, the environment provides an incredible amount of resources for cultural enhancement, self-development and creativity. It is logical that swearing should have become an ordinary atavism. So what is the reason?

Need for protection and self-affirmation

Obscene language is a unique phenomenon. It exists, but speaking it is prohibited by society. As you know, ignoring the rules occurs either out of naivety or out of fear and hopelessness. So lovers of strong words cannot be called happy people.

A person tries to hide vulnerability and self-doubt behind a demonstration of aggressiveness, independence and rudeness.

The more a person experiences confusion and disorientation in life, the more often he resorts to swearing. Like a frightened and therefore furious animal. Growling, hissing and showing fangs.

As a result, teenagers swear out of fear that they will not be accepted as their real selves. It’s easier to assert yourself according to the general laws of the pack, to be like everyone else. And adults, bearing a huge burden of responsibility, swear in order to drown out the feeling of fear due to possible failures.

The saddest thing is when people use swear words when communicating with each other. By insulting and humiliating the interlocutor, the opponent tries to assert himself at the expense of the other and at least for a second feel his superiority. Albeit in an inappropriate way from a moral and ethical point of view.

Laziness of mind

Indeed, why bother and waste energy on the correct construction of sentences, selection of expressive words and use of effective oratorical techniques.

After all, why waste time explaining in long-winded ornate phrases what can be expressed in one word in a second.

Pronouncing “bl...” with different intonation colors will save the sleeping brain and not disturb the memory. Disappointed: “Well, dear Klavdia Petrovna, you again forgot about the existence of a new sample for writing memos.” Aggressively: “Colleague, didn’t you see that you were placing this heavy box right on my leg?” Admiringly: “Look how incredibly beautiful it is around!”

The ability to communicate fully and beautifully is replaced by useless mooing of varying duration and tonality. Gradually, the vocabulary is depleted, and speaking correct Russian becomes more and more difficult.

Constant tension and stress

It has long been proven that swearing briefly helps to let off steam and feel functional again. Modern people have enough reasons for stress and conflict situations.

A person uses obscene speech as protection from the outside world. He's like a bristling hedgehog.

Such a person constantly experiences such strong psychological discomfort that over and over again he simply stops noticing the problems of other people and becomes less sympathetic and friendly.

And this model of behavior is transferred to the entire worldview, a negative self-perception is formed, other people and events begin to irritate. It has been proven that swear words increase adrenaline levels, body temperature and blood pressure. Like alcohol or drugs.

A person understands that he is beginning to be sucked into a destructive funnel of aggressiveness, a split in interpersonal relationships, and a lack of self-understanding. He loses control over himself and his life.

Practical advice

So, we decided that we had crossed all boundaries: swearing had firmly entered our lives. To fight him and yourself, the same methods are suitable as when fighting parasitic words.

Among the proposed methods there are also very radical ones. For example, wrap an ordinary rubber band around your hand. And with every strong word that comes out, pull it, and then release it so that it hits your hand as painfully as possible. As a result, “bad” words will be associated with pain. For greater effect, it is even recommended to use a stun gun. However, this is not far from masochism.

So:

We punish ourselves with “rubles”

You can have a piggy bank where you throw money every time a word pops up that isn’t a sparrow—you won’t catch it. The job is done - we pay the fine.

But this method will only be effective if the piggy bank belongs to someone else, and our money will float away from us.

After all, we will want to fill our own piggy bank faster, which will not encourage us to forget swear words.

Selecting a replacement

Quite often, a swear word comes out involuntarily: we were doused with dirty water by a passing car, or we accidentally dropped a heavy object on our foot, or inadvertently put our hand on a hot object, or accidentally slammed the door and were left without the keys. Similar everyday situations happen to everyone quite often, and, of course, swearing helps reduce tension. But it’s good if no one hears us. What if we are “in polite society” and would not like to embarrass anyone?

For such cases, you need to choose neutral words that will replace swear words: something like “Christmas tree” or words from another language - German, Chinese, etc.

First you will have to control yourself, and within a month the new words will become a habit.

Expanding vocabulary

We can’t quickly find the right word and utter the usual swear word that just keeps on the tip of our tongue? Are we considered an uninteresting interlocutor from whom we want to quickly escape?

Let's write down the "bad" words that we would like to get rid of, and look in the explanatory dictionary for a worthy replacement - words that will make our speech bright and expressive.

Controlling emotions

Before we blurt out the usual strong word, take a deep breath and count to ten. Emotions will subside, we will come to our senses and change our minds about swearing. This advice is not always appropriate: in certain groups and conditions, people only understand and respect swearing and will not budge until they are “sent.”

Changing the environment

“Whoever you mess with, you’ll gain from,” says the proverb. “Live with wolves, howl like a wolf,” says another. That is, whether you want it or not, if you fall into a herd of wolves, sooner or later you yourself will turn into a wolf. Under the influence of others, changes in your own behavior cannot be avoided.

There is another proverb: “A fisherman sees a fisherman from afar,” or like attracts like. Subconsciously, a person is drawn to those people, to that team, where he does not feel like a black sheep, where he belongs.

But if the goal is personal growth, then you need to leave companies where stagnation reigns and there are no and will not be opportunities for development.

There is a lot of talk about Russian swearing. Its effect on the body is being seriously studied by scientists, people argue about it, and they never stop talking about it. And only the advice of psychologists on how to stop swearing does not give anything.

How to unlearn swearing and speak beautifully

Replace curse words with other words. At first it will be difficult for you to limit yourself, so we advise you to replace swearing with any other word that you like. It could be a simple “Oh God” or “For God’s sake.” You can also come up with something more original, it all depends on your imagination. For example, instead of the word “shit,” say the word “sugar.” It will be difficult for you at first, but after a few days it will become a habit.

Elastic band on the wrist. Put a tight rubber band on your hand and every time you use swear words in a conversation, pull it in the other direction and let go. It will hurt you, but this is the only way you can eliminate this habit. Pain is a good helper, remember this.

Money . This method has helped many; it is one of the most effective. After each swear word you will have to pay a fine, set the amount yourself. Put all your money in a jar or piggy bank, and then spend it not on yourself, but on charity. The fine should be decent so that you don’t have the desire to swear.

Calm down. Most people use swear words when they are angry. If an unexpected situation arises, you involuntarily swear again, but you can’t do that. Try to control your emotions and calm down.

Stop yourself mid-sentence. And yet you could not resist and began to say this very word... Stop! Stop halfway and shut up! Don't say it completely, try to control yourself.

Support from loved ones. Tell your friends and family that you want to quit a bad habit. They will help you and control you in conversation, thanks to the help of strangers you will be able to control yourself.

Present. Promise yourself a present if you don’t use swear words for a week or a month. The gift must be valuable, otherwise you will have no incentive to work on yourself.

Imagine what you look like from the outside. You need to imagine yourself from the outside, it is unlikely that you will be pleased to watch this. Why should other people listen to your curse words? As a result, you will lose all your friends and acquaintances.

Surround yourself with positive people. Much depends on your environment; if you communicate with people who constantly argue, it will be difficult to get rid of the habit. You need to change your environment - communicate with intelligent people.

We want to tell you right away that it will not be easy to stop swearing, but with a great desire it is quite possible. All in your hands!

How to stop swearing: video tips

How does swearing affect us?

How to stop swearing if it is firmly in the heads of others? Obscenities easily fall from the lips of not only those whom people looked at with contempt from the heights of their intellect a generation ago, considering them cattle. Nowadays they not only swear, but also sing, and broadcast entertaining TV shows in which all the viewers laugh. It seems that you can’t hide from him or cover your ears. How else can we express our aggressiveness, our admiration and many other emotions? If words are not enough, of course, swear.

The training “System Vector Psychology” by Yuri Burlan does not give advice on how to stop swearing, he explains the nature of swearing and its impact on a person. When understanding comes, a natural internal prohibition arises.

Mat is always about what happens only between two people, about the act of intercourse between a man and a woman. When we swear with these words, express hostility, we devalue our own sexuality, including the sexuality of the one who hears this word. This is how sexual impoverishment arises. The person becomes sexually stupid.

Well, imagine, every day a girl or woman will be aggressively told that she is a “dirty little slut…” who does “this and that” with her man. And then he, the beloved man, will offer to do exactly “this”, to fulfill, so to speak, marital duty. And he will expect sweet pleasures, screams and moans, balancing act in bed.

But she already unconsciously perceives as dirty the act of intimacy, which is given by nature to people not only for procreation, but also for the greatest pleasure. Subsequently, the woman will seek advice from psychologists, ask about how to improve her intimate life, and will receive nothing. Because advice doesn’t work when there is an anchor in the subconscious created by your partner’s curses.

If a girl hears people swearing every day, it means she hears hostile meanings about it. How then will she be able to receive and give him pleasure at the right moment? How can a girl feel wanted? The advice - not to pay attention to swearing - does not change anything in life. She cannot relax, and intimacy ceases to give pleasure. As a result, the relationship ceases to satisfy both.

How can a girl stop swearing? She just needs to remember that by swearing, she devalues her sexuality, depriving herself of pleasure not only now, but also in the future.

How to stop swearing in front of children

Even more harmful is the impact of these words on the child’s psyche. Mat is about sex. It breaks through the cultural layer and reveals a forbidden interest in the topic of sex, so that we know how this simple matter is done. Are you sure your child needs to know the details?

Who can easily find the words and explain to their child where children come from? Some advise giving special literature to read. If the child heard swearing, he already guessed about it.

Mat carries a whole layer of sexual meanings. Are you ready to explain the meaning of these meanings?

Penetrating into the child’s consciousness, the swearing inevitably does its job. The fact is that a child under six years of age has infantile sexuality, that is, he does not think about intercourse at all, does not know, and is not interested. And information about how children are made is a stress factor for the child’s psyche. And if he heard about this from his parents, then he loses the feeling of security and safety.

Such swearing subconsciously removes the ban on incestuous relationships in the family, and the child becomes confident that intimate relationships are inadmissible in general.

Even a random swear word is dangerous for a child’s psyche. Subsequently, what he heard prevents him from having fun as an adult. And intimacy is perceived as a dirty relationship between a man and a woman. The trauma of hearing a swear word will not allow a person to open up and enjoy intercourse, hiding it all within himself like a concrete wall.

Hearing a swear word for a girl will become an obstacle to receiving pleasure (orgasm). A young man will not be able to succeed in a couple relationship or start a family even with his beloved girl.

Stop swearing at a teenager

At an older age, using obscene expressions in the presence of parents, the child will develop a feeling of permissiveness, which will affect his expression of himself in society. Now let’s imagine what will happen to our society if all children swear.

During puberty, when hormones are already making themselves felt, the child is not so dependent on his parents, does not listen to their advice, and tries to rehearse his adult life. He already hears swear words from his peers, and sometimes from his parents. At this age, the child’s cultural layer is laid, which will influence his entire adult life. Girls are already dreaming of love, tender touches and first kisses.

What happens if you swear at a slightly older child? His cultural layer will not be able to develop to the extent that he could realize himself as an adult. And instead of tender feelings, he receives such a blow to the psyche, and, having not yet developed, becomes emotionally and sexually damaged. Due to the traumatic experience received, no advice or recommendations for creating a happy couple relationship will work.

Who wants this for their child?

Unfortunately, an avalanche of obscene expressions descends on teenagers from TV screens and from the Internet. Unable to yet distinguish between benefit and harm for their psyche, teenagers sing along and repeat the obscenities that pour out on their unformed psyche from the lips of their so-called idols.

What will this mean for them in the future? Inability to create sensual and happy relationships. After all, swearing spoken in public is not capable of forming a correct perception of family and marriage in a fragile psyche.

Orthodox Life

website of the Gorlovka and Slavic diocese

The sin of foul language: is it so simple? Is it easy to get rid of it? Rector of the Vasilyevsky Church in the village. Stozhkovskoye, Shakhtersk, Archpriest Andrei Chaikin believes that this is a serious spiritual problem, and offers a way out.

In order to fight something, to start correcting something in life, you need to have the desire to do it. Therefore, until there is a thirst to change yourself, nothing will work out. You also need to understand what the sin of profanity is. The Holy Fathers have written a lot about it, and the pastors of the Church often touch on this topic. I will highlight four points.

First. Foul language is a disease in which we, first of all, defile ourselves. Often it assumes that a person lacks a vocabulary and, of course, a culture of behavior.

Second. By using foul language, we defile not only ourselves, but also ourselves and our mother, and even the Mother of God, our Most Pure Mother - that is why swear words received such a name.

Third. By using swear words, a person calls upon demonic forces into his life. Many historians and linguists argue that swearing originated from pagan rituals that used phallic symbols. That is why it is called bad language, or foul language. The purpose of using it was to summon unclean spirits.

Fourth. We can justify ourselves with a word, and we can destroy ourselves with it. Foul language blocks our path to the Kingdom of God, it becomes the shackles that bind us hand and foot and do not allow us to move towards salvation. We insult the Mother of God, we insult the image and likeness of God. Our tongue is the weapon with which we either glorify God or resist Him.

How to deal with this sin? First of all, you need the desire to overcome it. It must be supported by the saving sacraments that exist in the Church. First of all, this is confession. You need to come to the priest, confess this sin, receive a blessing to fight it, and to help yourself, partake of the Holy Mysteries of Christ, if the priest allows it. Where there is the life-giving power of the Holy Spirit, everything unclean perishes. These are our first steps.

Second. The Holy Fathers, and in particular St. John Chrysostom, say that you need to watch your tongue, and in order not to use foul language or slander, you need to try to speak as slowly as possible. It is important to think about every word you say, and the more carefully we do this, the less opportunity we will have to use swearing to connect words. This applies not only to swearing, but also to all the parasitic words that sometimes abound in our speech. Slow, thoughtful speech has always distinguished good-looking people. It is difficult to imagine a saint who would chatter and chatter. All famous ascetics were distinguished by deep thinking. Before saying anything, they thought about whether their words would hurt a person, and each of their words was like a jewel, acquiring special power and healing properties for the soul.

In order to fight profanity, you need to have shame. A swearing person is like an exhibitionist. Just as these people show everyone their shameful parts of the body, so a foul speaker, swearing, shows all the abomination of his naked soul, the uncleanness and passions raging in him. Foul language, according to the holy Apostle Paul and John Chrysostom, is equated to the sin of fornication. When committing fornication, a person uses his body to indulge passions, and foul language is the fornication of our soul. Therefore, it is on a par with debauchery and adultery.

You need to understand that before God there are no small or large sins. Many holy fathers talk about this. Every sin is an abomination. The worst thing about the so-called “little sins” is habit. We get used to them to such an extent that we often don’t even pay attention to what we are doing. We do not realize that we are sinning.

Many consider foul language a trifle, but, as we have already said, it is equated with fornication. Fornication is one of the deadly sins. These passions and vices are distinguished by the fact that they are very difficult to fight. That is why overcoming foul language becomes an overwhelming burden for those who want to follow the spiritual path. But this block looks like a small stone! So this sin is very tricky.

Foul language is also difficult to overcome because it usually goes hand in hand with anger. Let us once again remember John Chrysostom’s advice to try to speak slowly and deliberately - it is not accidental. Anger is an impulse, an explosion of emotions when a person does not control himself. A Christian needs to learn to control himself. When we speak slowly and think through our words, in this process we become distracted and suppress unwanted emotions.

How to rebuild yourself? After all, when a wave of anger hits, it is easy to step on the same rake and again fall into the sin of foul language. Is it possible to change? - Can. But only together with God. Without His help it is impossible to be saved. When we feel that anger or irritation is overtaking us, we must try to read the Jesus Prayer - the Holy Fathers also talk about this. We need to switch to another wave - to the wave of glorifying God. And the Lord at this moment will give you the strength to stop in time and not say too much.

There are also simple ways. Many priests recommend that not only those who swear, but also people who find it difficult to convey their thoughts to others and whose speech is full of filler words, try to read as much as possible. I support this idea. You need to read as much as possible, and not only Orthodox literature. The more often a person takes on a literary work of art, the better. Then he involuntarily replenishes his vocabulary and broadens his horizons. By comparing himself with some heroes, paying attention to their speech and actions, he can correct his behavior.

Foul language carries another danger. A person who swears infects other people around him, and above all those who are most defenseless - children. “But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were drowned in the depths of the sea” (Matthew 18:6) - said Christ.

There are foul-mouthed people who know how to “beautifully” clothe their thoughts in obscene language and are proud of this, considering themselves almost artists of words. It's the same as if a slave boasted of his shackles. Yes, these people consider themselves free, but they are still slaves - slaves of those demonic forces into whose hands they have given themselves.

By the word we are sanctified. When a priest reads a prayer for the blessing of water or fruits, they change their properties. A foul-mouthed person also changes his inner world, his soul - but only for the worse. It is in our power to make sure that, thanks to our words, the world is sanctified and not clothed in more and more evil.

Recorded by Ekaterina Shcherbakova

website of the Gorlovka and Slavic diocese

Swearing is not the norm

A man realizes himself through his desire for a woman. And what kind of desire will lead him to victory if, already in adolescence, a newly made idol put into his head the idea that a girl is a thing, and this dirty thing needs to be changed more often.

Swearing as a trigger triggers the instinct for animal mating, so it is simply necessary to stop swearing. And this is not just advice that can be ignored - it is necessary for the preservation of the psychological health of an entire generation of young people.

It's not a dirty word. This is a dirty word, hidden. When people became cultured, they stopped using these words. Culture creates the intimacy of these words. Swearing is not the norm. Swearing is uncivilized and harmful.

If you still have doubts or disagree with some thoughts, come to Yuri Burlan’s free online training “System-vector psychology.” You will be able to understand more deeply, because one article cannot explain everything. If you are a girl and want to get advice about relationships and much more, come to the free online training. Register by

Author Valeria Vladimirova Editor Yanina Burakova Proofreader Elena Lavetskaya

The article was written using materials from Yuri Burlan’s online training “System-vector psychology”

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Everyone knows that swearing is bad and even prohibited by law. However, foul language is generally accepted as a social norm. Even television reports are often full of beeping. But there are people who do not swear at all. Have you decided to become one of them? Wonderful! Beautiful, clear and expressive speech always leaves a positive impression of a person and gives favor to others.

How to get rid of this habit?

Getting rid of obscene language is not only possible, but also extremely necessary. Let's look at several effective and highly effective ways to overcome this addiction for girls, boys and teenagers.

For girls

A girl who uses swear words in her vocabulary looks unattractive and rude. Representatives of the fair sex simply do not have the moral right to utter such vile and disgusting words, so we recommend that you pay attention to the following recommendations:

take up cross-stitching or beading (activities of this kind distract from problems, calm the nervous system, and make you forget);
visit various exhibitions, performances, circus performances;
walk in the park more often, ride a bicycle, roller skates, or skate;
meet with your friends, chat about everything in the world, try to throw out all the negativity that has accumulated during the day;
shopping is the best “medicine” for many women; go to your favorite stores;
unlearn swearing by reading books, thereby increasing your own vocabulary;
count the bad words spoken during the day, trying to reduce their number daily;
make more new acquaintances (communication makes us better, because in front of a new person you always want to show yourself exclusively in the best light).
read poetry every day - if you want to swear, start reciting lines from your favorite poem to yourself for 10-15 seconds (this method will distract you and help you wean yourself from swearing).

For guys

Many young people use swear words in their daily vocabulary due to the influence of the company in which they communicate in order to look more status and “menacing” in front of friends. This behavior is low and unworthy of a real man, therefore, wean yourself from this harmful addiction as soon as possible. The following tips will help you with this:

play sports - run, swim, ride a bike, go boxing (sports activities will help throw out negative energy, and you simply won’t want to swear);
do not do things that make you swear, for example, an unloved activity, together with people who are unpleasant to you;
if you swore, then do push-ups or pull-ups on the bar (for example, if you said 2 swear words, you did 20 push-ups or pull-ups), this approach is considered quite effective and fast-acting;
if you don’t have a girlfriend, then try to start a relationship (after all, it will be quite a shame to utter such vile words in front of your beloved), and if your significant other is already present in your life, then change in her eyes, perform a real feat for her - become more cultured and well-mannered ;
refuse to communicate with a company where they swear, and such speech is considered the norm.

For teenagers

In most cases, teenagers begin to swear in order to look more mature among their peers, as well as because of psychological problems that arise due to the relationship of their parents or due to improper upbringing (perhaps someone in the family actively uses obscene language words). It is necessary to wean your child from foul language as soon as possible. We recommend using the following tips:

take the teenager to a child psychologist - a specialist will be able to understand and find out the cause of this problem and give valuable recommendations for treatment;
find out who your son or daughter is communicating with - if possible, protect the child from the wrong company;
have a preventive conversation with the teenager - explain that swearing is not cool, not beautiful, and only ill-mannered people do this;
introduce a system of punishments and rewards - for every swear word uttered by a child, you will limit him in his favorite activities for 2-3 days (for example, TV, computer), and for refraining from swearing you will reward him (for example, going to the cinema, theater, swimming pool);
sign your teenager up for a class or a club (new acquaintances often help), keep him busy so that he simply doesn’t have time for aimless walks around the yard.

In this article, you learned about the main reasons for the occurrence of swear words in people’s vocabulary, as well as useful recommendations for eliminating this problem in girls, boys and teenagers.

What is swearing

Swearing, or verbal invective, is a sharp verbal attack on someone. Words and expressions of this kind exist in every language, but regardless of culture, there are more negative statements than positive ones. Swearing often expresses contempt, disapproval, and anger. There is nothing special about this: the human psyche tends to notice negative aspects and is more willing to give a negative assessment. For some reason, we are not used to talking about good things. Let's remember any book of reviews: people express dissatisfaction with particular pleasure, and take excellent service for granted and for granted.

Swearing is the crudest form of swearing, existing in any nation, but prohibited in any civilized society. Why is it still alive if it is banned (by the way, it cannot be eradicated)? It is a product of oral speech and cultural heritage (sounds funny). Swear words are not recorded in literary dictionaries, are not pronounced in public, and are not used in the press. At least that's how it should be, according to society's norms. In practice, the swearing itself has not caused outrage for a long time; it is rather special cases that are surprising.

The origin of the swear word is not known exactly, but the borrowing theory has long been refuted. It is recognized that Russian swearing is one of a kind from a linguistic point of view and an echo of primitive instincts from a socio-psychological point of view. A swear word in humans can be compared to a grin or a fighting stance in animals. Why does a Russian person need swear words?

Why do people use foul language?

Mastering swearing probably begins in childhood. For children, this is a sign of adulthood. Due to mental characteristics and personal immaturity, children choose the simplest path - imitation. And if for young children this is a way of adaptation, of entering the world, then teenagers regard this as “coolness,” maturity, authority, and courage.

Why, having matured, do not all people stop swearing or try to do it not everywhere and not always:

First, habit is strong.

Secondly, according to scientific research, swearing acts as a pain reliever due to the production of joy hormones - endorphins (additional reinforcement).

Thirdly, swearing may be the norm in an individual’s environment.

Fourthly, a person simply does not know how to express his thoughts differently due to weak thinking and poor vocabulary.

The fifth reason is an attempt to relieve stress, emotional tension, and excitement (“Ugh, I feel better”).

The researchers came to another interesting conclusion: when swearing, the one who swears produces testosterone, and the one in whose direction the swearing is facing, testosterone decreases. Thus, scolding is a way of suppressing an opponent. It is worth noting that the method may be effective, but it is not social, inferior, primitive. There are many more correct ways to show and earn authority.

Thus, it can be argued that swearing is a trait of insecure people. It is they who choose such forms of self-affirmation (“Swearing is prohibited, but I, so brave, bold and dangerous, swear”). “I don’t care who thinks what. This is my challenge to society,” thinks the inveterate swearer.

All people are familiar with swearing. Those who do not swear restrain themselves. In what situations is it especially difficult to restrain yourself, when you can hear swearing from the calmest and most cultured person? In a state of fear, danger, anger, risk, affect, extreme irritation and indignation. Back to uncertainty again. Remember: swearing is always perceived as aggression. “The best defense is an attack,” says worldly wisdom.

However, there are people who literally use obscenities. Here, I think, it is more correct to talk about lack of culture or a specific perception of the world and the vision of a certain charm, charisma, and acuity of speech in swearing. Yes, for some people it is part of the image. What’s interesting is that the environment itself cannot perceive them differently. But even the image has its deep roots.

How to stop swearing

It's worth starting with the fact that a person does not notice when he swears. If this is not a cry from the heart, but a habit, then only those around you notice it. And not always, provided that swearing is part of the image. If you decide to get rid of the swearing, then get ready for complex and painstaking work.

Realize for sure that you want to stop swearing. It deprives individuality, nurtures cynicism and immorality, precedes other violations of social norms, suppresses communication abilities, deprives the ability to explain and analyze, build a monologue and dialogue, and forms stereotypical reactions and indecisiveness. Swearing deprives people of the opportunity to constructively solve a problem (they had a fight and separated). Strength is spent on the swearing itself (a specific exchange of emotions without analysis, discussion and solution to the problem). The swearer's speech becomes incoherent.
Bring the habit to a conscious level: record the number of swear words (write it down daily), ask someone to control you. You can assign penalties: clicks, money, push-ups, squats.
Don’t try to replace it with another unnecessary word, but it’s worth looking for literary alternatives. Do an exercise every day to select synonyms for swear words, study dictionaries, and expand your vocabulary. If you are chasing the charm of speech, then study ancient Russian words. Although philologists do not really welcome this (historicism, a relic), the law allows it. Additionally, words like “cursed” will arouse interest and a smile among others.
Mat fills an emotional void. Learn to better understand your emotions and give them a rational outlet. Mat is a warning of danger, an expression of joy, and a conclusion of sadness. Analyze exactly when and what kind of mat you use. Can it be replaced by a description of some feeling, emotion? I think yes. Do it.
Foul language can be seen as a mask, an attempt to hide one's true self. It is possible that a person is perfectly aware of his emotions and feelings, states, but cannot open up and trust other people. As a result, he puts up a shield from the mat. Allow yourself to be sincere.
Swearing can be regarded as a defense of the individual. Think about what you are afraid of and allow yourself to express yourself in a socially acceptable and positive way. Swearing will not satisfy the internal need for protection and security, and the problem of self-doubt will not be solved.
When does a person use swearing for clarity of speech? Provided that he cannot quickly select both informative and vivid words. A division occurs: boring information along with interesting and unexpected obscenities or more loyal curses. There is only one way out - work on your speech, master the art of oratory. Work on your thinking, your ability to put thoughts into words. This can only be achieved with practice: study dictionaries and write down your thoughts, analyze their accuracy. Watch censored films and record how the characters convey their emotions and thoughts.
You can’t do without self-control and willpower. But mechanical control alone cannot solve the problem. No matter how strange it may sound, swearing is a psychological symptom of personal problems (fear, anxiety, uncertainty, anger, aggression, despair).
If you can’t completely get rid of swearing, don’t beat yourself up. Maybe we shouldn’t impose a complete taboo? Allow yourself to swear in private (to release emotions or to indulge).

Mat has a closer connection with underdeveloped empathy and emotionality, the ability to understand even one’s feelings, than with a poor vocabulary. Perhaps the example for a long time was overly functional and rational relationships or conflicting ones (with the same obscenities). As a result, the personality turned out to have an underdeveloped emotional and aesthetic side.

In women, swearing can be subconsciously associated with equality and feminism. Society does not accept swearing, but swearing from a woman’s mouth is even more condemned. Thus, for girls, in addition to the reasons already mentioned, another one is added - the struggle for equality.

Swearing refers to parasitic words, so the recommendations for getting rid of them are the same. Read about this in detail in the article “How to get rid of parasitic words.” And, of course, remember that treatment is always about eliminating the root causes. The fight against profanity is no exception.

The Russian language is known throughout the world for its strong words that many of us love to use. But excessive use of swear words is not good. Therefore, many people are trying to understand how to stop swearing at a girl. But this can be difficult to do. The force of habit, company, upbringing, etc. play a role here. To get rid of this addiction, it is necessary to apply self-control and an integrated approach.

How can a girl stop swearing?

People tend to acquire bad habits, especially during adolescence. But you have to struggle to get rid of them, making efforts and working on yourself. Obscene expressions have become firmly established in everyday life due to the poor vocabulary of ordinary people. To express your thoughts, you need to choose words and put them into a sentence. But if there are no cultural words in the lexicon that have appropriate meaning, and one obscene word can serve as a synonym for several at once, then it takes up space in a person’s head.

There always come periods when it becomes simply fashionable to express oneself unprintably, especially among young people. Nowadays rap is in trend, using words consisting of swear words and the habit of communicating on social networks using Russian swear words. In order to look decent in the eyes of their peers, not only guys adopt this manner of speech. Fortunately, some people think about the herd instinct and want to resist it.

☝️So, how to stop swearing for a girl who no longer notices this bad habit:

1. Seek help from another person. If in your social circle there is a more cultured girlfriend or friend who is ready to help, you can contact them. Someone from the family is also suitable as an observer, provided that he does not criticize or lecture. What is required from the “assistant”: the person must pay attention to filler words in your speech and report every fact of their occurrence. You can correct your speech in pairs with someone, providing mutual assistance.

2. Understand why you use dirty words. You need to observe yourself, reflect and understand what provokes you to use swear words. Some swear because of bad grades, others are nervous and relieve tension with words. If you manage to find such a provoking fact, you need to think about how to avoid tense situations so as not to cause a negative reaction in yourself. If you swear because everyone around you does so, you will have to think about your social circle and new acquaintances with more cultured people.

3. A fine piggy bank can help in the fight against parasitic words. Get a piggy bank, just don't use it as usual. Such jars are filled every time a bad word is uttered. Choose the amount of the voluntary fine and put the bill in the jar every time you can’t resist. This type of “punishment” is also used in organizations to improve the culture of communication. And the reward for your efforts will ultimately be a tidy sum, which you can reward yourself with after defeating a bad habit, but not before. This is a good example of how to stop swearing at a girl quickly and effectively.

4. Another common psychological technique based on physical influence is an elastic band on the hand. Once you put it on your wrist, don’t take it off until you achieve the result. How it works? Every time a bad word comes out of your mouth, you need to pull back the rubber band and snap it on your hand.

The sensation is not too painful, but unpleasant enough for the brain to register it. Accompanying bad words with a click forms new neural connections in the brain, thanks to which the pleasure of swearing will be replaced by negativity, and you will automatically try to use it less often and will soon stop doing it altogether.

I told a teenage girl how to stop swearing, but for a successful result you need patience, attentiveness and work on yourself. These methods work when people quit smoking or want to overcome other bad habits.

How to stop swearing? Psychologist's advice

A little more about how to get rid of the habit of swearing:

5. Psychologists advise imagining next to you, for example, a strict grandmother or teacher. But this will work after you learn to track filler words in your speech. Every time you are overwhelmed with emotions and curses are ready to spill out, imagine that your grandmother is next to you. Or a teacher, or a boss, a younger brother, a daughter, or any person in front of whom you would be ashamed for these words. Every time you utter obscenities, remember them and think about their reaction. This works the same way as an elastic band on the arm, only the effect is not mechanical, but emotional.

6. Another option for how to get rid of swearing in speech is to avoid music and movies with unprintable vocabulary. Often teenagers repeat the words of a song they like, without thinking that half of it consists of swear words. If you are also influenced by popular artists and have become a victim of modern art, this method can help.

7. Psychologists advise to understand and convince yourself that swear words are bad. It’s not for nothing that they are banned in literature. People swear for various reasons. Some do this out of anger, others to give meaning to words, and others because of poor vocabulary. This way of speaking does not make the most pleasant impression. Someone who swears in this way looks like an uneducated redneck, even if he is a genius in the field of science. This makes a repulsive impression on others and may offend them.

8. Sometimes replacing expressions works well. Remember how in the film about gentlemen of fortune, Leonov’s hero re-educated his charges? You need to work with yourself in much the same way. To begin with, you can write a cheat sheet, a kind of mini-dictionary of translation from obscene language into Russian, and even learn normal expressions and words. When they are firmly ingrained in memory, replacing expressions will not be difficult. It is important to make an effort at the initial stage. Imagine learning a foreign language while living in a foreign country and this knowledge is vital.

To figure out how to stop swearing forever, you can try several of these methods or try two or three at a time. Remember, none of them will work effectively without independently revising your vocabulary. For bad words to be replaced by good ones, they must be heard. This means you need to avoid swearing, songs with obscene language, and try not to read texts filled with obscenities.

It is advisable to surround yourself with any printed publications with correct speech, communicate with cultured people and improve your own literacy. Mat is closely associated with ignorance and a low standard of living; it is a sign of poor upbringing and substitution of concepts. To become a full-fledged person, to rise above your environment, you need to fill yourself with correct speech, good literature and art.

Carolina Korableva

About the author: Hello! I am Karolina Korableva. I live in the Moscow region, in the city of Odintsovo. I love life and people. I try to be realistic and optimistic in life. What I value in people is their ability to behave. I am interested in psychology, in particular conflictology. Graduated from RGSU, Faculty of Occupational Psychology and Special Psychology.

How to stop swearing in a week?

Start reducing the number of such words every day. First of all, don't swear in the street. Leave the sharp words for home.

Then, stop arguing with friends. Then, you can swear only mentally. After which, give up this habit altogether.

If you can’t do this in 1 week, don’t be discouraged. The main thing is to take a small step forward every day and move towards the goal. It is advisable that friends and acquaintances support you in this. Then it will be much easier to quit swearing.

Motivation comes first

Understand why a girl should stop swearing? Define goals and objectives for yourself.

You need to realize that checkmate:

Makes you a prostitute (and an experienced one);
Attracts people from bad companies to you;
Pushes parents, teachers, etc. away from you;
Reduces your chances of getting a normal job;
Reduces vocabulary, reducing mental abilities.

As a result, you turn into a redneck, which is perceived as an obviously stupid and narrow-minded creature. And even if you think you look cool, from the outside it’s far from true.

Today's world is more civilized than society in the early 2000s. Therefore, ladies who constantly swear are perceived very negatively in most companies. Remember this and fight this habit.

Mat is not cool!

Often girls speak a dirty language because they consider it unusual, individual and interesting. To get rid of such a stereotype, it is worth considering the original meaning of each bad word.

So, the word “d*ck” is the male genital organ. Do you want to constantly refer to this part of the body in conversation? No! Then throw this word out of your vocabulary. Think the same way about other words and you can beat your habit.

Look at the people who are your standards of success. Most of them don't swear. After all, almost all singers, artists, poets, and politicians speak normal Russian. They're cool, but they don't use tough words. Take an example from them.

The only way a girl can stop swearing is through her own efforts. Don't shift responsibility to the company or hard life. Just start speaking correctly here and now. Here's a simple recipe for dealing with foul language.

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