Emotional sandbox. Studying emotions with childrenAlexandra Razdyakonova

Varieties of human suffering

Let's talk about psychological suffering.

Although if you look at it this way, then in many ways physical suffering is often associated with psychological suffering. But about physical suffering some other time.

I know very well what psychological suffering is; one might say that I am a good master of psychological suffering. I would like to believe that this is already in the past, but I think that my skills as a sufferer will remain forever. The question is whether I will use them. I can’t say this for sure at the moment.

Instead of starting, I would like to quote the lines of the writer David Wong (if I found the link correctly):

Remember, suffering is comfortable. That's why many people prefer them. Happiness requires effort, courage and responsibility. It's incredibly convenient to know that if you don't create anything in your life, then no one can attack what you created. How much easier it is to just sit and criticize what everyone else is creating.

From my point of view, these are golden words. Of course, some may reproach me for the fact that no one suffers the way they suffer. And in principle they will be right, I do not want to write in this article that those who suffer are doing it for fun, and to minimize the pain of their suffering. They are really suffering, there is no doubt about it.

Let's try to figure out why they do this . I would divide suffering into three categories:

1. suffering - suffering,
2. suffering - saturation,
3. suffering is running away.

Suffering – suffering is when some event actually happens (for example, the death of a loved one), and a person is in grief. The process of experiencing grief lasts up to a little over a year, but it can end earlier. And at this moment it is natural to suffer, it is like the process of healing a wound, when damaged psychological tissue is restored.

If at this moment you use anesthesia (disconnect from feeling and awareness of emotions through an effort of will or using various chemicals), then the process of experiencing grief may drag on for an indefinite period. To live a full life, you still have to return to the experience of grief.

Suffering is saturation, it is the process of obtaining psychological saturation from experiencing familiar emotions. The fact is that it is very important for a person to experience emotions for life, without them he can even die. It could happen in a person’s life that the only emotions that he (she) can assimilate (be satiated with) are suffering. And then, in order to fully “nourish” them, they need to be organized, or at least relate to what is happening in such a way as to see everything through the prism of suffering. This is the end of the world soon, and everything is now much worse than before, and the death of children in starving Africa.

These people really see in the environment exactly those characteristics that, in fact, should inevitably cause complex, negative feelings. And this is rather their problem; they actually have no other ways to get emotional saturation.

Suffering is an escape; it is the process of actually avoiding one's life. Such people simply hide behind their suffering so as not to take responsibility, not to do those things that they are afraid to do, in general, such a universal way to jump, not to make important decisions for themselves. And in principle, what are the complaints against these people - they suffer, they need to be pitied, and not branded with shame or otherwise condemned. As a rule, such people have no real difficulties, but they have no fear of living to the fullest.

I think that if you search, you can find other types and subtypes of professional sufferers. And I think that often these types of suffering are present in one person, sometimes they pass from one type of suffering to another. And I think that they all have the right to exist for a certain period of time.

We all have the right to suffer from mental pain, and sometimes it is truly necessary in all three cases I described. It’s worse when suffering continues for a long time (years), then it’s worth thinking about - maybe looking for other ways to satisfy your needs.

Emotional sandbox. Studying emotions with childrenAlexandra Razdyakonova

Chapter 2. Joy and grief-suffering

Joy and sorrow in living rapture,

Thoughts and hearts are in eternal excitement.

Goethe

How often joy and sorrow in our lives go hand in hand. If in the life of an adult the boundaries are clearly separated, then in the life of a child they are blurred. At one moment a child can be happy, laugh, run, jump, and then suddenly he cries, he is in pain, he has fallen or someone has offended him. For us this is a small grief, but for him it is a grief the size of a large cow. Do not underestimate the child’s feelings, because this is important for him.

Remember!

People react and experience certain situations differently. For example, something that seems insignificant to an adult may matter to children. Each age is characterized by its own leading activities, including its own ideals and values.

“Joy” itself is a rather bright and strong feeling. It captures us completely, and sometimes we can’t stop smiling. When children are happy, they jump, skip, wave their arms, and can even scream loudly, openly demonstrating what they feel. Adults rarely want to do something like this, and they sincerely do not understand the violent reaction of children, considering it ordinary pampering.

Children can easily join in someone else’s joy and get so excited that they don’t notice how they inadvertently touched another joyful child. And then the joy will end, replaced by a negative emotion. In such cases, children should be explained that they should rejoice in such a way as not to harm or frighten others, because the main thing for a child is to share joy with others.

Also, the child should know that not always and not everyone wants to be “infected” by his or someone else’s joy; people may be busy or have other feelings. They are not against his joy, but are not ready to join him now.

Did you know that joy can be loud and quiet? People can scream with happiness, rejoice in victory, actively gesturing with their hands and saying something loudly. There is also quiet joy - it is sometimes called “tenderness.” People don’t show affection openly, they just feel good and warm inside. Their world is filled with love and they feel happy.

Heading:

“
Adults and children speak”
Children

They say:

Joy

- This…

“...fun, laughter”, “...when you are having fun, when something good has happened”, “...that emotion that most people want to experience, to feel wonderful”

Grief

(suffering) is...

“...boredom, sadness, longing-sadness (laughs)”, “... when something bad happened, when someone offended or hit you”

Adults

They say:

Joy

- This…

“...when a person feels that everything is fine with him. Or, when some long-awaited pleasant event happened,” “...an emotion that brings positivity to a life situation, giving a feeling of one’s own rightness,” “...gaining satisfaction from the completion of some event, which entails the receipt of certain abstract or physical resources. The chain can be longer (an event that is likely to cause the occurrence of another event that will cause the receipt of resources)”, “... a positive emotion that we experience as a result of some good event, the fulfillment of desires”

Grief

(suffering) is...

“...a feeling of loss, lack of something or strong resentment”, “...tears, the corners of the lips are very downturned, the eyes are empty”, “...an emotion that carries negativity and a depressing state of mind”, “...grief is experienced by a person as a result of loss. For example, the loss of a loved one, separation from a friend and other difficult life circumstances. Characterized by a depressed state, tearfulness"

At one time I was interested in the following question: “Do all children understand and know how to express their emotions?” As it turned out later, not all and not always. Although in the case of “joy,” we can say that most children are familiar with this emotion, most often it is called differently, for example, “happiness” or “laughter.” But this is more typical for children of senior preschool or primary school age.

But few children know or name the emotion “grief-suffering.” They are more familiar with the emotions “sadness” or “sadness.” And no wonder, in childhood we rarely encounter events that evoke such a strong emotion in us. If we compare emotions with colors, then “grief” is a dark blue color, and “sadness” (sadness) is blue or even light blue.

You probably know the joke that hamsters are needed to show children death. So, thanks to this animal, children really experience that same grief from the loss of a pet, but they usually confuse it with sadness.

When looking at pictograms and seeing two emoticons, children often do not see the difference between them. For them it is one emotion - “sadness”, and in both cases. But you can already explain the differences to schoolchildren, give examples of specific situations associated with these emotions, and then they will understand you and learn to distinguish between them.

Younger schoolchildren usually depict the emotion of “joy” with gestures, facial expressions and pantomime (expressive movements). Sometimes children 3-4 years old have to explain what exactly is expected of them when they are asked to portray the emotion of “joy.” But explaining the emotion “grief” to kids turns out to be quite difficult. They often confuse it with an emotion such as “sadness” and do not see the difference between them.

The zone of proximal development (zone of perspective; the child first performs any action with the help of an adult, and only then is he able to repeat it independently) in the sphere of emotions for children of primary preschool age (3-4 years) are considered the emotions joy, sadness and anger (anger). That is, these are the emotions that should be developed in children first. All other emotions are formed at a later age.

Let's look at two ways that will help you tell your child about the emotions “joy” and “sorrow-suffering” (including any other emotion that you want to introduce your child to): what kind of emotion is it, what does it look like, how express and define it.

First stage: At 3-4 years old, it is important to “place” the word denoting the emotion “joy” or “grief-suffering” in the child’s active vocabulary (speak, tell). Only in this case will it be possible to ask the child questions regarding this emotion and be sure that he understands what we are talking about;

Second stage: introduce the child to the expressive expression of the emotions “joy” and “grief-suffering” (show and invite the child to observe the manifestation of this emotion in life, in fairy tales, etc.).

Note:

End of introductory fragment.

Declension of the noun suffering

Translation of suffering

We offer you a translation of the word suffering into English, German and French. Implemented using the Yandex.Dictionary service

• To English
• To German
• To French

• suffering
  - torment, pain, misfortune, sorrow, agony unbearable suffering - unbearable suffering
• mental pain
• untold misery
• emotional suffering
• world of sorrow

• Leid
  - pain
• Leiden
  the suffering of humanity – Leiden der Menschheit

• souffrance
  - sadness, misfortune, sorrow, torment physical suffering - souffrance physique

Hypo-hyperonymic relationships

evil trouble suffering

What is suffering (adjectives)?

Selection of adjectives for words based on the Russian language.

physical mental unbearable written new more terrible human alien full own painful deep cruel endured bodily inhuman heavy strong endless incredible present genuine great superfluous moral moral eternal any inexpressible terrible human incredible experienced long additional no innumerable intolerable earthly huge love unnecessary unthinkable similar solid heart senseless internal considerable any heavy true unbearable undeserved general genuine former sincere caused immeasurable acute past dying

What can suffering do? What can be done about suffering (verbs)?

Selection of verbs for words based on the Russian language.

distort reflect disappear bring cause cause deliver remain have to cause remind embrace merge impart appear flash become revealed yield yield teach begin warp retreat cause happen cause make lose kill mean transfer do begin get force add fog derail freeze rise flash appear glow exposed leave excite leave cease deliver harden through hide pierce have dull pass take possession cost reflect equalize penetrate join change

Associations to the word suffering

face voice eye infinity cruelty ancestor reason earth world loneliness view suffering future course bottom comparison past hand separation help death hunger wound prison people life end consciousness joy of light cold torment wine love heart head account faith paw loss cross path sin necessity kingdom answer heat form hug pimple mask betrayal word shower corner youth minimum birth theme illusion hope disease stretch

Anagrams of the word suffering

steradian

Synonyms for suffering

agony pain torment torment ordeal torture contrition passion torment languor toil

Antonyms for suffering

joy

Hypernyms for suffering

1. trouble

Scope of use of the word suffering

General vocabulary Religion Medicine Legal term Rare expression