In practice and in life, I often hear the question “ Help me understand the situation ,” “ I have a situation like this in my life, ” or “ How will this situation develop?” »
We use the word “situation” very often in everyday speech:
-We need to thoroughly assess the current situation.
-The situation is not going well
-Let's think together about how to get out of this unpleasant situation.
What is a “life situation”?
What are we talking about when we use the word “situation” ? At first glance, the situation is something external, independent of a person. Often people understand a situation as a set of circumstances in a person’s life (from the French situation - a set of circumstances). That is, it is a certain fragment of reality, a situation, a situation that arose on the basis of a confluence of any conditions in which a person finds himself.
But this fragment of reality does not appear in a vacuum, but in the life of a specific person, and most importantly, it encourages him to formulate his attitude to this situation.
“A person must act in a situation, but it does not tell him exactly how, and this is where his freedom lies... The situation is a compulsion to make a decision, but freedom lies in the decision itself” (N. Hartmann)
The life situations of each person are unique , and their uniqueness opens him to the experience of his own existence and gives value to his life.
“The more differentiated and individualized the sense of value of an individual in a particular situation, the more intimate and essential is his participation in the plurality of its values. Situations are the field of human activity... Their diversity forms the entire content of his existence.” (N. Hartmann)
Thus, in addition to the circumstances, the situation also involves the person himself with his own view of this situation and the ability to make decisions. In some cases, a person can influence circumstances by changing them, but it also happens that the situation cannot be changed, and then it becomes important to give meaning to this situation and experience existential value.
The essence of the concept of “difficult life situations” for children, their typology
In domestic and international practice, there is an expression - a difficult life situation, which means the experiences of a person who finds himself in a situation that seriously affects his well-being, life safety and from which he is not always able to emerge with honor (he cannot find a worthy way out for him). In this case, he needs the help of the state and society.
Children who find themselves in difficult life situations especially need help. It is more difficult for them to independently find an acceptable way out of the current situation. Taking this fact into account, the state is trying to predict and determine the most appropriate ways to provide assistance to a child who finds himself in a difficult life situation. The main goal of the state (society) is to create the most optimal conditions for the life of a child and his upbringing.
In the Federal Law of the Russian Federation “On Basic Guarantees of the Rights of the Child in the Russian Federation” dated July 24, 1998 No. 124-FZ , Art. 1 formulates typical difficult life situations for a child, in which the state undertakes to provide him with the necessary assistance. These include loss of parental care. This phenomenon can occur in a number of cases:
a) death of parents;
b) refusal of parents to take their children from social protection institutions, educational, medical and other institutions;
c) parents’ independent cessation of parental responsibilities towards their child (self-withdrawal from raising the child);
d) failure by parents, for one reason or another, to fulfill their responsibilities towards their children (for example, for health reasons - danger of infecting the child, etc.);
e) prolonged absence of parents (for example, a long business trip);
f) restriction of parents in parental rights. The decision is made by the court taking into account the interests of the child. It can occur under the condition that leaving a child with the parents (one of them) is dangerous for the child due to circumstances beyond the control of the parents (one of them) (mental disorder or other chronic illness, a combination of difficult circumstances, etc.);
g) deprivation of parents of parental rights. It acts as a legislative measure for parents who do not fulfill their responsibilities towards their minor children, as well as those who abuse parental rights.
Parents' responsibilities include:
- child support;
- creating normal conditions for their life;
- be their legal representatives and advocate for their rights and interests in all institutions without special powers;
- raising them.
Deprivation of parents of parental rights is aimed at protecting the rights of children raised in a family, to protect them from cruelty and other abuses by their parents. It can only be carried out by a court decision. Parents deprived of parental rights lose all rights based on the fact of relationship with the child, but are not released from the obligation to support him. If such a parent, by his behavior, makes it impossible for the child to live together with him, then he can be evicted without being provided with another living space. If parental rights are deprived of both parents, the child is transferred to the care of the guardianship and trusteeship authorities;
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h) the inability of parents for one reason or another to fulfill their parental responsibilities:
- serving a sentence;
- declaring them incompetent when they cannot, for health reasons, fulfill responsibilities towards their children (physical abilities or mental disabilities);
- the crisis state of the family, which does not allow it to fulfill parental responsibilities towards the child (unemployment and forced to look for work, difficult financial conditions);
Children who find themselves in conditions in which they require special professional assistance and (or) protection:
- disability. We are talking about children who, due to health conditions, are considered to be disabled children. They need special (corrective), correctional-compensatory development, training and education;
- deficiencies in mental and (or) physical development. Such children also need special (corrective), corrective-compensatory development, training and education;
- victims of armed and ethnic conflicts, environmental and man-made disasters, and natural disasters. In this case, a complex of medical, psychological, pedagogical and social measures is needed to help the child;
- children who are part of families of refugees and internally displaced persons who find themselves in extreme conditions;
- children are victims of violence. This phenomenon can be observed in a family when there is abuse of parental rights. It consists of parents using their rights to the detriment of the interests of children (for example, creating obstacles in learning, inducing begging, theft, prostitution, drinking alcohol or drugs, etc.);
- children serving a sentence of imprisonment in a correctional colony;
- children in a special educational institution;
- children whose life activity is objectively disrupted as a result of current circumstances that cannot be overcome independently, including by the family.
In the above cases, the child falls into the custody and guardianship authorities - local government bodies, which are entrusted with the responsibility of protecting the rights and interests of children left without parental care.
The guardianship and trusteeship bodies are called upon to:
- identify children left without parental care;
- register such children;
- select forms of placement for children left without parental care. At the same time, they try to place them first of all in a family. To this end, they promote the creation of foster, guardianship and other types of families;
- provide patronage to foster families, provide them with the necessary assistance (obtaining vouchers to summer camps, holiday homes, sanatoriums; placing children in schools, creative groups); contribute to the creation of normal living conditions and upbringing of a child in foster families (assistance from psychologists, teachers, social workers; assistance in improving living conditions);
- exercise control over the conditions of detention of the child, the fulfillment of the parental responsibilities assigned to the foster family for his upbringing and education.
In case of failure to fulfill their duties in relation to adopted children, guardianship and trusteeship authorities are obliged to take measures to protect their rights.
What types of life situations are there?
In the course of life, a person faces various life situations. A person copes with some things in life easily, but in some cases he has to turn to different specialists for help. This could be, for example, a crisis situation at a turning point in life, or an everyday situation filled with troubles and stress, or a situation of choice that causes discomfort. First of all, in psychology, life situations vary in level of difficulty.
Types of life situations by level of difficulty
Habitual
Situations in everyday life - ill health of family and friends; quarrels or disagreements in the family and with loved ones; conflicts at work; not very successful handling of material resources.
Difficult
Illness of relatives and friends. Acute disagreements in the family and with loved ones. Parting, change of place of residence. Complications at work. Loss of some property, money. Reduced inflow of material and cash resources. These situations can be called difficult situations of everyday life. Our lives are filled with such situations.
Crisis
Death and disappearance of relatives and friends. Divorce, separation. Situation of violence or threat to life. Loss of health. Fire, flood, terrorist attack. Theft, loss of housing, property, money, work.
Drawing from the textbook: M.A. Odintsova “Psychology of resilience”
It happens that life situations repeat themselves, and you seem to be walking in a vicious circle. If this happens, maybe it's time to seek an analysis of your own life.
According to our observations:
- parents often feel fear and confusion due to a lack of knowledge and understanding of how to best help their child;
- children are able to show the greatest strength of spirit, making enormous efforts to cope with the disease, even in those cases when they are left alone with the disease.
“We really wanted to fight and were ready to dig our noses into the ground for this. Panic, confusion and despair were due to the fact that they did not know where to get knowledge - where to run, who to believe, what to believe in. The child really wanted to get better and refused to go home from the hospital when I wanted to pick him up, saying that in this condition he absolutely needed treatment. And this despite the fact that he always loved his home very, very much and missed it.”4
How to support someone who is depressed
Depression is one of the most common mental disorders. The causes of depression can be deeply hidden, it greatly affects a person’s life and only in 40% of cases does it go away on its own - and even then not completely. Depression can also lead to a complete loss of interest in life, suicidal behavior and suicide.
To help a person who is depressed, loved ones should remember a few simple rules - what to do and what they should never say. Here's what psychologists recommend:
- Let the person experience this state
- Speak honestly
- Don't discount failure
- Recognize the importance of this situation
- Be careful with jokes
- Don't force
- No aggression
- Be patient
- Help get rid of the fear of specialists
- Stay close
Footnotes
1 Compliance in medicine is the patient’s voluntary adherence to the prescribed treatment regimen. 2 Describes the stage of a family’s life associated with the treatment of a child in the pediatric oncology department of a clinical city hospital, with the family accompanied by a psychologist from the ANO “Children’s Hospice”. 3 Author – Olga Kostenkina, mother of a 9-year-old boy 4 Author – Olga Kostenkina, mother of a 9-year-old boy
The manual “Psychological support for families of seriously ill children” was published on the project page of the “Golden Psyche” competition
