Many people believe that the guy should be the first to take the initiative in a relationship. But it happens that a girl herself falls in love with a representative of the opposite sex. At the same time, the young man does not pretend that he likes her. Fortunately for the fair sex, there are techniques that will help you make a young man fall in love with you. Read this article and you will learn how to win a guy’s heart by chatting with him on VK.
What to ask a guy in a text message and how to do it right
The reason for correspondence can be a like on a photo, a clash in an interest group, the presence of mutual acquaintances offline, and a thousand other reasons.
His “hello” may be expected, or it may be a pleasant surprise.
Whatever scenario turns into reality, you want not only to show your interest, but also to learn more about the interlocutor, to understand what kind of person is hiding behind the screen. How he laughs and gets angry, how real his photos are (or staged), why he even decided to start a virtual acquaintance...
But before you pour out a stream of questions on the guy, remember - on the Internet, as in real life, there are certain unspoken rules. And breaking them often means being left with nothing.
So remember:
no one likes intrusiveness that makes a person feel awkward and come up with the “correct” answers to the questions asked. Do not turn communication into an interrogation, because the points that interest you can be clarified not immediately, but over time in the process of correspondence; don’t try to be better, prettier, smarter, sexier, more original, etc. Uncharacteristic behavior, pompous phrases, photoshopped photos betray themselves as a lack of “soul” - and who would want to communicate with an ideal robot? Therefore, be yourself, don’t try to adapt to everyone you meet. After all, as you know, for every hunter there is his own beast; publish your own good quality photos on your profile, don’t hide behind pictures - such actions reveal a fake, with whom hardly anyone wants to communicate; write correctly. Of course, complex phrases taken from the pages of scientific works of the past will scare off even a fighter for the purity of speech, but the banal absence of spelling and grammatical errors will only work in your favor. And don’t hide your emotions under monosyllabic “aha”, “meh”, “ok”, write in such a way that a stranger sees you as a real interlocutor with his own opinion and outlook on life; end the conversation in such a way that the guy wants to continue the conversation.
Where to start virtual dating?
Social networks are sites created specifically for communicating and sharing news with friends. Such resources allow you to search for people you once knew, as well as make new acquaintances. Before deciding how to start corresponding with a guy, it is important to understand whether it is worth doing it at all. By carefully reading the questionnaire and looking at all the records, photos, audio, video materials, you can learn a lot about the person. Before starting communication, it will be useful to find out if the person you like has a girlfriend. Otherwise, you can get into a very unpleasant situation if you start flirting with an “unfree” young man. If there is not enough information on the page, or you don’t want to write first, you can show your interest in a neutral way. A good option is to comment on a post or put an o under photographs or audio recordings. There is a high probability that our subject will be interested in the “mysterious stranger” and will be the first to write.
How to get a guy to like you via pen pal
First, critically evaluate your page - how interested would you be in such an interlocutor? Look through the photos (not only the latest avatars, but also the archived ones, which you yourself have long since forgotten), flip through the audio recordings, read the available information in the profile. And if incriminating evidence, strange entries of unknown origin, errors and typos are found there, it is better to spend half an hour and bring your “Internet face” into proper shape.
If a guy is attracted to your page, try to create a positive first impression. But don't overdo it - if you've had a rough day, it's better to be honest about it than to pretend to be Miss Fun. The interlocutor is not an idiot. Even if he does not recognize an outright lie, the chill and tension between you is guaranteed for a long time.
An important point is to correctly bypass the “slippery” places in the conversation. If the topic is unpleasant to you, it is better to honestly say that you do not want to discuss this issue now than to try to make a forced joke or clumsily change the topic. The guy will like appropriate directness, but trying to get out of the quagmire will, at best, make you laugh, and at worst, make the guy lose interest in you.
How to regain a man's interest photo
how to return a man's interest
Usually a man's interest in a woman disappears because he thinks that he knows her, she is like a clue to him. The usual clothes, hairstyle, old perfume no longer attracts him. Try to appear before his eyes in a new image. Get a new hairstyle, finally, just dye your hair a different color, buy a new dress, underwear, new perfume, put on a new make-up, high heels on your shoes. Try to be natural with this whole outfit, as if this is your usual look, so that he doesn’t think that you did it for his sake. Point out that this is related to your new sensations. Let him think that something happened to you, but he doesn’t know what caused such changes in your appearance.
How to interest a guy by correspondence
To prevent the conversation from becoming boring, add a touch of interest to it. For example, offer to have a conversation in an “either-or” format. Such games help not only to have a good time, but also to find out the type of temperament of your interlocutor. For example, questions like “mountains or beach”, “racing car or Mercedes S-class”, “redhead or brunette” will help you get to know the guy better, his inclinations, attitude to risk, etc. After all, a direct question can be answered with a “comfortable answer”. "response, but the one veiled under the game often receives a more overt return.
Another way to interest a guy is to skillfully ask for his opinion, show interest in his hobbies, and ask for advice. It’s especially cool if you’re smart and ask him about something you haven’t discussed yet. Look at his photos, look for pages on other social networks, don’t be lazy to look for photos with him - such materials sometimes provide more information than correspondence. And the more original you ask the question, the more interest you are guaranteed.
If you are embarrassed to write first
Get over yourself and stop being shy. Your shyness will definitely not attract him in any way. And do you know why? Because shy girls achieve little in life. Shyness can be felt just as strongly (even from a distance) as insecurity.
Wait for him to write to you himself. But keep in mind that you will have to wait a very long time. The worst thing is that you may not wait. And then you will be angry with yourself, but anger will not help.
Get this guy out of your head. And you will solve many different problems at once. You won’t have to worry, think about how and what to write. A cruel way, but there are others.
Ask your girlfriend to write to him (on your behalf). But make sure that you don’t write anything unnecessary. Otherwise you’ll blame your girlfriend if she writes everything her own way.
Correspondence with a guy: examples of questions
- Which dreams have you already made come true, and which ones are you planning in the near future?
- What do you do in the evenings after work?
- An action you are proud of? What's your bravest move?
- What were you like as a kid?
- How do you dream of spending your old age?
- Do you like to travel? What countries do you dream of visiting?
- Favorite movie, TV series, book, super hero?
- What is your relationship with your family?
- Are there any brothers or sisters?
- How do you feel about children?
- Are you a morning person or a night owl?
- What did you dream of being when you grew up?
- Do you like spontaneity?
- What's your best birthday ever?
- Do you have a lot of friends? Tell us about them.
- Can friendship exist between a guy and a girl?
- What wish would you ask to be granted right now?
- What do you like about girls? What can't you stand?
- What clothes do you prefer?
- Can you cook?
Men's opinions
We asked men what they like and what irritates them in messages from women. And here's what we found out.
My girlfriend and I don’t meet every day: both she and I have floating weekends. But we are trying to fit them in so that we have a couple of free days. In correspondence we plan where we will go, what we will do at my house. She loves to fantasize, she can send candid photos in her underwear. It excites me, fills me with energy, in general, I recharge for the rest of the day.
Alexey, 23 years old manager at the Decathlon sporting goods hypermarket
Now I’m single, but remembering text messages from my ex, I can say that I didn’t like her intrusiveness and unpredictability. 10-15 messages could arrive per day, and not only cute and pleasant ones. There were often reproaches, understatements, and insults. If I didn’t answer for a long time, she would get irritated and sarcastic. Then she became affectionate, asked for forgiveness, and joked. And then everything starts all over again. I'm tired of her demands and changing moods.
Mikhail, 35 years old, entrepreneur in the consulting field
I don’t like guessing games and hints. If you want to ask for something, say it directly. I love it when a girl is in a good mood, and through WhatsApp it is transmitted to me. I myself like to joke, to joke about something, we laugh together, even if from a distance.
Pavel, 20 years old, sales consultant at Eldorado
I like receiving letters from girls. This shows that she cares about me and that she thinks about me. I love playfulness in words, ease, lightness. I like everything about my girlfriend, but if I fantasize, then in messages from women I would be irritated by demandingness, whining, some questions that I cannot answer immediately, raising problems that are better solved face to face.
Denis, 39 years old, photographer
How to understand that a guy likes you by correspondence
The most important “beacon” that will help you understand a guy’s attitude is his readiness and desire to correspond. If he is waiting for an online meeting, writes to you first, is not late at the agreed time, and is not too inclined to say goodbye, most likely he likes you.
What is also important is how willing he is to share intimate things with you. Moreover, it is not necessary to wait for confession - a story about how the day went can mean more than a confession of something supposedly very personal. Ask about his mood, ask questions about relationships with friends, funny things that happened at work, and note whether the guy is ready to share a part of himself with you.
The same applies to you - if a guy talks about himself and makes no attempt to get to know you more deeply, you are looking at a typical narcissistic talker.
Flirting can be seen by his tone: the guy is clearly not indifferent to you if he praises you, gives you compliments, wishes you pleasant dreams in the evening and a good day in the morning. He can send virtual gifts, delight you with funny emoticons, make surprises, that is, show his attention in all available ways. Caring, the desire to protect and advise is also important - it is characteristic of any man in love.
What to talk about?
In fact, the answer to the question of what phrase to start a correspondence with a guy with is very simple. The first message should definitely say hello. And so, he answered something, what should I write next? In fact, all people (and men more so) love to talk about themselves. Ask questions, read carefully and clarify. Of course, you should not immediately ask about something too personal. But neutral topics - interests, art and events happening in your city - will help to establish contact. It is very good if the interlocutor also asks questions. But think carefully about your answers, write clearly and in reasonable detail. Avoid too long messages; rather, tell a short and interesting story. Guys like girls who listen well and have a good sense of humor. So feel free to joke, but avoid anything that could be offensive.
Show genuine interest3
No, this does not mean that you need to bombard the young man with messages every minute. There may not be many of them, but every word will be filled with meaning and interest in the interlocutor. The young man should feel that he is of genuine interest to you. Does the guy have hobbies? Great! Ask him as much as possible about his hobby. Does the young man occupy an interesting position? Ask him about the specifics of his work. Thus, you will definitely be able to win him over from the first messages.
Flirting or serious relationship?
First, you should decide for what purpose you are going to get to know him. Friendship? Sex? Love?
The first option definitely disappears immediately. Any psychologically normal girl is unlikely to “hover” around a guy’s account around the clock in order to make a pen pal. Most likely, you can cope with such a task without the advice of wise psychologists.
For the second option, no special intricacies in behavior are required: a frank “avatar”, an appropriate status and - done! In this case, the right contingent will find you.
But what to do if this guy is your dream? And you really want, at a minimum, to please him by correspondence, and at most, to make him fall in love with you?
If the situation is painfully familiar, then you shouldn’t despair. It’s better to take yourself and the situation into your beautiful, well-groomed hands and start acting. So, how to please a guy via correspondence on VK (Vkontakte) or any other social network?
