How to approach a girl you like?

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Category: For men, Dating girls, Finding a girl, Articles

Are you an interesting adult man, but your personal life leaves much to be desired? Do you have no experience of long-term serious relationships? Perhaps the whole point is that when communicating with the fair half of humanity, you are subconsciously afraid of them. Fear, embarrassment and lack of self-confidence are quite common problems, so it is advisable not to delay solving them.

In their youth, most guys find themselves afraid of meeting a girl. And this is a completely understandable feeling. If a person is absolutely not afraid of anything, it is recommended to consult a psychiatrist, because this is a deviation from the norm. Fear is the main stimulus and source of the instinct of self-preservation. But you must be able to manage it, control emotions and not allow it to be the other way around.

Causes and types of phobias

To cope with fear and uncertainty, you need to know “where the legs come from,” that is, understand the original source of the problem. As a rule, this feeling begins in the early years of life. As a child, our parents constantly take care of us, telling us to be careful. On the one hand, this is good - this is how their concern is manifested, but on the other hand, it is bad, because in the child’s mind the idea is formed that there are a lot of dangers in the world around them.

Another reason for the appearance of phobias in communication with girls is the instructions of the mother. Often women tell their sons that girls are predators and want to use guys, so if you find it difficult to approach and talk to the beauty you like, think: “So why am I afraid, what is stopping me from meeting girls?” Awareness and acceptance that a problem exists is the first step towards eliminating it.

You should know that men’s fears in communicating with the fair half of humanity are different. Here are the most common options:

• I'm afraid to approach her. Taking the first step is the hardest thing. But you need to understand that the fear of meeting a girl can deprive you of a lot. You can sit in your bachelor pad, watch life and all its joys fly by. As you know, water does not flow under a lying stone, so I can’t go through it, I don’t want to go through it, I’m afraid through it, I have to approach strangers and start communicating.
• I'm afraid of rejection. Another option if you are not afraid to approach, but are afraid that you will be rejected. This usually happens if a man has already been burned a couple of times. You need to realize that every woman will not throw herself at your neck. You are a conqueror, a hunter, so behave accordingly, seek agreement, and do not give up at the first refusal. Well, then - it’s not you who was rejected (she doesn’t know you at all yet!), it’s just that she’s not quite ready to meet you yet.
• Fear of communication. Anyone will feel scared when it comes to starting a conversation with a stranger. What can we even talk about? Start with something simple, with the same banal weather. And then everything will go by itself.
• Pressure from others. We are often afraid of what people around us will think when they see clumsy attempts to get to know each other, if they laugh or make inappropriate comments. Forget about outsiders, their opinion is just their opinion.

The list of phobias and reasons why you feel fear in the process or before meeting a beautiful girl can be continued endlessly. The main thing to remember is that your doubts and thoughts are only in your soul and head. The beauty does not suspect about them, so you need to stay as calm and confident as possible.

What should you not do?

There are certain phrases and actions that can ruin any acquaintance. Just in case, they should be carefully avoided - you can never tell in advance which of the phrases that seem harmless to you will touch the nerve of a stranger.

Reference! Sometimes a stranger can be offended and set against you by things that are completely acceptable to you.

What can scare a girl away:

1. First of all, when meeting people, you should avoid making contemptuous statements and insults towards people of a certain race, size, religious and political views (as well as religious teachings and ideologies). Of course, there is a possibility that your words will coincide with the girl’s views, but still, with unfamiliar people you need to take a neutral position, without touching on sensitive and taboo topics.
2. A person, especially a girl, may be put off by your appearance or your manners. If you don’t take good care of yourself, are poorly and carelessly dressed, smell unpleasant, are intoxicated, don’t be surprised if a girl immediately rejects you when you try to meet her. It's ridiculous to hope that a decent girl won't notice your week-old stubble, mud on your shoes or the smell of alcohol fumes.

Important! Avoid talking too loudly, blocking her path, or approaching her from behind as if sneaking up on her. Scaring an unfamiliar girl and then trying to get acquainted with her is not the best idea. Try to overtake her by a step and only then start getting acquainted.

Pay attention to the place where you want to meet: avoid dating near garbage dumps or in dark underground passages.

You can provoke a negative reaction to your dating attempt and even scare the girl.

Swearing and swearing out loud in case of refusal is useless. Besides, it certainly won’t make you look better in her eyes or in the eyes of passers-by.

Avoid questions like:

1. “Can I meet you?”
2. “What are you doing in the evening?”
3. “Does your mother need a son-in-law?” etc.

The point is not only the banality of such tackles, but also the fact that in this way you shift the responsibility for the development of the conversation from yourself to her. Do you think that if you are embarrassed to take initiative, she will easily meet you halfway and begin to bombard you with questions? But it’s unlikely.

Important! It is you who are primarily interested in getting to know each other, not her. You have to act as a guide, leading the conversation in the direction you need.

How not to meet a girl is explained in the video:

https://youtu.be/8dWseNybpTE

How to develop self-confidence

Remember that fear always accompanies a person as he develops. You are afraid of the new and unknown, and that's good. One of the most effective ways to combat this negative emotion is to do the thing that makes your knees shake the most. You just have to grit your teeth, gather up the courage and start talking to girls. This mechanism, this act will make you feel better, feel relief.

If you can’t immediately approach and meet a woman in a cafe, fitness club, or just on the street, try a technique called “Emotional Flow.” All you have to do is dress well and smile at the girls all day. But that is not all. When you catch a woman’s gaze, hold it for 3 seconds, smile even wider, and look away. If the beauty responds to your “shooting with your eyes” with a smile, then you can safely approach her and get to know her.

Realize that fears of meeting a beautiful and interesting girl are preventing you from living. As soon as you do this, start auto-training. Repeat the following phrases in front of the mirror every day:

• I am the best!
• I am successful!
• I am brave!
• I can achieve what I want!
• I will overcome my fears!

You may have heard of body language. Start studying it! This will help you understand whether the girl wants to communicate with you, whether she is interested in you. This approach will eliminate refusals and awkward situations. There are a lot of signs that a woman is interested in you. If a lady smiles at you, looks straight into your eyes, straightens her hair while looking at you, fiddles with parts of her clothing, asks questions, tries to touch, these are clear signals that it is worth continuing the conversation. It is likely that it will develop into something more.

Rules for meeting a girl on the street

It's time to systematize your knowledge and derive a formula for successful seduction. You will achieve success if you strictly follow our recommendations. The rules are:

1. Approach your chosen one in a good mood (confidence, humor, positivity).
2. Look decent (neatness, style, pleasant smell, clear speech).
3. Avoid platitudes and rudeness.
4. Make an appropriate impression.
5. Don't be embarrassed if a girl is walking in the company of friends.

First phrases

There are several ways to meet a pretty person. Choose phrases depending on the chosen strategy, experiment. The guerrilla strategy is considered the most universal and winning. The dialogue begins with neutral “secular” phrases, and only then you get down to business. Classic options:

• at the stop, ask about the schedule or the location you “need”;
• offer help (if things have fallen or the beauty is carrying heavy bags);
• conversation about shopping (we ask where a handbag, blouse or something else was bought);
• become interested in a dog or an unusual accessory.

The second strategy is straightforwardness. There is a very high refusal rate here, so pick-up artists go through options and communicate with different girls. How to meet a girl on the street using a “daring” strategy? This is a solution for brave guys who are not afraid of anything in life. As an example:

1. “Aren’t you tired of waiting for me yet?” (works on benches).
2. "Why are you looking at me?" (before this, stare at the object for a long time).
3. “Did you pinch me?” (the phrase is thrown over the shoulder as the stranger passes by).

Ready-made examples

There is a list of phrases that have been successfully used for many years. Here they are:

• “I can’t think of a conversation starter. Let’s imagine that the right words are said and we continue our walk together.”
• “I have valuable information. I like you so much".
• “Can you tell me where I’m going? Your smile distracted me from the route.”
• “You are doing something strange to me. I’m worried, I want to know your name.”

Components of success

Overcoming fear and strengthening self-confidence is not everything. There are some simple and accessible tips that will help you become a conqueror of women's hearts. So, important recommendations:

• Watch your appearance. Firstly, stylish modern clothes will help you feel more confident. Secondly, fashionable and neat guys attract more attention than unkempt guys wearing a stretched sweater. Don't forget to shave more often and buy expensive perfume.
• Come up with topics for conversation in advance. It should be something universal. Be sure to expand your horizons. Read more, watch educational videos, get acquainted with the classics of cinema and art. The more you know, the easier it will be to find common interests.
• Don't forget about your sense of humor. Laughter helps make communication easy. There is no need to tell jokes one after another, but, if possible, try to make the girl laugh and become the reason for her smile.

Now you know the main secrets that allow you to conquer the fair sex, and you won’t say to yourself “I’m afraid or embarrassed to meet women,” because communicating with girls will bring you pleasure, and your personal life will sparkle with new colors. Go for it! It depends only on you whether you will be happy. And if you still have questions and confusion, come to the training, upgrade yourself, get rid of the burden of phobias!

Fear of girls' displeasure

Are you afraid that girls will be unhappy with you? The whole comedy of life lies in the fact that there are no people with whom everyone would always be completely satisfied. People aren't perfect. And do you know why? Because whether they are perfect or not is judged by others. Sometimes a person himself is dissatisfied with himself. And all this happens because everyone has a certain ideal image in their head that all people should correspond to. And those who do not correspond to this image are considered imperfect. Thus, there will always be someone who doesn't like you, even if you are super successful, rich, beautiful and smart.

Fear of girls' dissatisfaction arises when a guy has low self-esteem and expects those around him to increase it. Self-esteem increases due to the fact that other people praise you, encourage you, and encourage you. And since not all people will be happy with you (this is an axiom!), you focus your attention only on those who are dissatisfied with you, forgetting about the opinions of those who like you. Why ask about personal opinion? How do you rate yourself? Do you consider yourself a loser? Why? What is stopping you from loving yourself as a loser and helping yourself become a winner?