How to behave in a relationship: things to do in a relationship

Men are radically different from girls in their worldview and understanding of different things in life, as a result of which misunderstandings and difficulties often arise between partners in relationships. A man can prevent them through sensitivity and attentiveness to his chosen one; in addition, the psychology of relationships teaches everyone how to behave with a girl.

If you consider the basic rules of psychology that teach relationships with a girl, you can significantly improve understanding between partners. Only experienced men know how to behave with a woman, but young guys just need to learn the wisdom and subtleties of interpersonal relationships. Psychologists give some basic advice on how to behave when meeting someone, on a date, and also with a girl you already love in a relationship.

How to behave with a girl: general rules

The relationship between a man and a woman is the most burning and relevant topic in psychology; an innumerable number of treatises and dissertations have already been written on this subject. Despite this, men continue to wonder how to behave confidently with a girl in order to interest her, conquer her and enjoy harmony in the relationship.

When communicating with a man, all girls and adult women pay attention to several factors - manners, education, appearance, his character and the circumstances of the meeting. There are several basic rules, depending on the specified criteria, that are appropriate at any stage of a relationship with any girl.

Namely:

• A man’s appearance – girls will always like a toned body, a man’s neatness in matters of personal hygiene, a thick haircut, stylish and clean clothes and shoes, as well as a pleasant aroma.
• Education – it is not necessary to have a diploma from a higher educational institution, but rather about indicators of self-development, for example, reading books, visiting cultural institutions, watching films and educational programs.
• Manners - any girl will appreciate it if a man offers his hand, opens the door for a girl, helps her put on outerwear, etc.
• Character - most often girls want to see strength, responsibility, caring, self-confidence, kindness, and determination in their potential partner.
• Other circumstances - men without work, goals and potential have no chance of winning over a girl; representatives of the fairer sex need someone who will become a support and shoulder.

Expert opinion
Elena Druzhnikova

Sexologist. Family relations expert. Family psychologist.

If a man has all the listed indicators - education, good manners, success and determination in life, good character traits and a pleasant appearance, he will never remain in the shadows unnoticed by the fair half of society. 50% of success depends on the basic rules of how to behave with a girl.

How to please a girl? Develop self-confidence!

How to please a girl?
Develop self-confidence! How to please a girl? What communication technique should be used for this? How to make new acquaintances and give compliments?

There is a lot of advice on this topic, but their abundance only obscures the main task that a man must set for himself in order to please a girl or make a woman fall in love with him.

Let me give you a small analogy. Let's say you have an old Cossack. The car seems to be running, but for some reason the girls don’t want to get into it. So you decided to improve the perception of your car. You start reading tips and advertisements on how to make a “cool” car out of an ordinary car.

They tell you something like this: “In order for a car to be more fashionable, you need a fashionable stereo system.”

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You follow this advice and install a stereo system in your Zaporozhets. Read the ad further: “A fashionable car should have air conditioning.”
You install the air conditioner. Further, more: you need to change the wheels, oil, alarm system, tint the windows, paint it, etc. and so on. What's happening? The perception of the car has improved a little, but very little, and for some people it has even worsened.

If before simply no one wanted to travel with you, except for your close friends, now they also point their finger after you, laugh and say: “Look, look what a fool, who invested more money in the old Zaporozhets than it is worth.” And of course, after such “improvements” no self-respecting girl will definitely sit down with you.

Of course, in this example it was necessary to exchange the old car for a new one. If you drive a Mercedes, then even without an alarm system, air conditioning and a stereo system you will be perceived better than in a sophisticated Zaporozhets.

I think in this example everything is clear and not many people do this. But for some reason, when it comes to advice on how to make a girl fall in love with you, a similar mistake is made all the time.

You can learn to dress better, give compliments, give flowers, make new acquaintances, and communicate. I'm not saying you shouldn't do it - do it. Unless all this obscures the main thing.

And the main thing is that in order to please a girl or make a woman fall in love with you, you must first develop self-confidence. By the way, in the second and third places too!

There are, of course, additional skills.

At a young age, it means physical strength, good grades at school or college, but not a “nerd.”

At an older age - the ability to earn money, provide housing, etc. (For information on how to make money, read the series of articles in the “How to make money” section). But these are all additional skills. If there is no confidence, neither physical strength, nor good grades, nor money will help (I am not talking about prostitution, or relationships similar to them).

So, once again. In order to please a girl, you first need self-confidence, so spend most of your time developing it. Then, if you want, master additional skills: meeting people on the street, compliments, physical development, dancing skills, etc. That is, don’t make the same mistake as in the example with the old car. It is useless to wear even the most beautiful and expensive suit if you have low self-esteem.

I would say more, if you are a confident person, then girls will like you, even if you don’t want it. There will be many more girls than you need (Of course, if you need several new ones every week, then confidence alone is not enough).

The second thing to remember is that self-confidence develops and develops very well.

You need to pay attention to this. It doesn't matter what your starting level is now. Even with very developed shyness, you can reach the average level in 3-4 months, and after a year you can be more confident than 90% of men.

I’ll tell you, using my own example, how I learned to please girls and developed self-confidence. As a teenager, girls didn't like me and I was very shy about them. I wasn’t friends with any of the girls or even just talked. My timid attempts to even just talk to the girl I liked led nowhere. In the last year of the school where I studied, many guys were already friends with girls, many later got married.

At the same time, it was all just a matter of terrible uncertainty and shyness. My appearance is normal, my physical development at that time was very good, I also studied quite well.

Since I wanted to be friends with girls, but it didn’t work out, I decided to work on becoming confident.

I read somewhere that if you try to act like a confident person for long enough, then after a while you will automatically become confident. So I started trying to act confident. A week passed, then another, a month.

These activities caused me incredible pain. But the goal was important to me. So I endured as long as I could. Two months of daily training and torment - and what is the result, you ask? The result, I will say, was miserable. I became a little more confident, but it was completely different from what I wanted. In addition, I gave up trying to act confident because I was tired of the constant stress.

The next recipe I found for developing confidence was: “You need to practice self-hypnosis and visualization. That is, imagine how you confidently behave and pronounce self-hypnosis phrases, for example, “I am confident in myself”

. I worked out for about a couple of weeks, and practically did not feel any results at all, unlike the first method, where the results were even scanty, but there were, and then I quit.

Another six months later, I read another recipe on how to become a confident person. In principle, this is the same as the previous one, only it said that the results of the classes will come no earlier than in 20 days, and you need to do it every day and for at least 30 minutes.

To be honest, I even took up the classes without much enthusiasm. I did visualization about 2 times a day for 30 minutes and another 15 minutes of self-hypnosis. Sometimes, instead of visualizing, I relaxed for 30 minutes.

As they wrote, practically nothing happened for about 20 days. After 20 days, fantastic events began to happen. I became more and more confident almost every day. This instilled a lot of enthusiasm in me, and I began to train more, about 3 times for 30 minutes plus self-hypnosis for about 20 minutes a day. I wrote in great detail about how I trained, methods and exercises, in the book “How to become confident in yourself in 3 months” - buy it and practice without a break for 3 months, and girls will start to like you.

Most importantly, I didn’t have to try to appear confident in front of anyone.

This happened by itself, against my will. I’ll even say more, if I wanted to pretend to be shy again, I couldn’t. Then he gradually added other exercises, such as behavior training in an empty room, training in public, opinion

which were not important to me, etc.

Well, what about the girls, you ask? And this is the main thing for which the classes began. I gradually began to communicate with girls, then communicate even more. Week after week of training, I began to notice that girls liked me, even those who had not paid attention to me before.

After several months of training (about 5-6) there was some kind of qualitative leap. Suddenly, unexpectedly for myself, so many girls began to like me, which I did not need (I am not a Don Juan by nature). They literally began to “stick” to me.

I achieved my goal and I never did any more such intensive training.

Why is it easier for a confident man to please a girl and achieve her?

Reason one

the fact that a confident man speaks, moves, looks and thinks differently, and in this context in a way that girls like more. In short, he speaks louder, a little slower, calmer, moves smoothly and without fuss, makes eye contact, and is positive. A confident person is more sincere, that is, he often speaks the truth, even when it is risky, has a simpler attitude towards problems that arise in life, knows how to solve life’s problems independently, etc.

Reason two

is that he is simply more persistent and is not afraid of rejection (not so afraid).

Let me give you a short anecdote. A young man asks the experienced Lieutenant Rzhevsky how he manages to have sex with so many women. Lieutenant Rzhevsky answers him, I go up to the lady and say: “Let's have sex...”

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Then the younger man asks in surprise: “So you can get hit in the face for this?”
Lieutenant Rzhevsky answers him:
“It happens in the face, and sometimes we have sex.”
I am not suggesting that you use the lieutenant's advice in the literal sense. However, a confident man can invite a woman to dance, start a conversation where a less confident man would simply shy away and remain silent. And no less important, if a woman said no the first time, then this does not stop him, and he will ask again and again.

The third reason is that a confident man is not fixated on pleasing only a specific girl. This can be a truly unrealistic task. Quite often there are cases when a guy likes a girl, despite the fact that she does not pay any attention to him. If a man is confident in himself, and some woman doesn’t like him, despite his efforts, then he, of course, will be upset, but after a while he recovers, and then looks for another woman, one who will appreciate and love him.

The fourth reason is that only when a man is confident, women begin to see his other virtues, such as fidelity, reliability, kindness, politeness, etc.

Let's summarize. In order to please a girl, the main thing is to develop self-confidence. If you don’t have confidence, at least to a minimum, then nothing will help, not money, not a bodybuilder’s body, not good grades. If you have confidence, then girls will like you regardless of their desire.

Self-confidence can be developed. To do this, you need to train for 3-6 months, depending on the initial position and intensity of the training.

Source: How to get a girl to like you? Develop self-confidence! You don't know how to please a girl? First of all, work on your self-confidence! https://www.sun-hands.ru/4psihologisgenshinayverennost.htm

How to behave with a strange girl

Most often, difficulties arise in men who do not know the rules of conduct when meeting a girl. In this case, it is extremely important to make a positive impression on the stranger in order to encourage further communication. You can meet the lady you like in the most inappropriate places, for example, in the subway or a noisy restaurant filled with visitors, where in the rush and bustle you need to take the first step without missing out on the beautiful stranger.

When meeting a girl, do you make contact first?

Not really

When he sees a girl you like, a man is required to follow a few simple rules on how to behave:

1. Finding a moment to get acquainted . You can wait until she goes outside to get some fresh air, in a club you can simply invite her to dance, in the subway you can get off at her stop and start talking when the opportunity arises.
2. Calm and confident behavior. Despite the inner excitement, a man needs to remain calm and confident, but without going too far.
3. Originality in moderation. Not all girls show understanding if a man, when meeting him, uses a creative approach and phrases such as “Does your mother need a son-in-law?” It would be much more appropriate to have a simple conversation, introduce yourself and offer to get to know each other in tandem with compliments.
4. An action for her. You can offer the girl help, for example, carry her bag, order dessert for her table, give up her seat on the subway, etc.
5. Invitation to a meeting. If the situation is conducive and the girl is not in a hurry, you can invite her to go to the nearest cafe for a cup of coffee. Slowness and delaying a date can lead to the fact that a man simply will not have a second chance.

If a girl gave her phone number when meeting, the man needs to accurately indicate the time of the call and fulfill his promise. If the attempts were unsuccessful, the girl gave a clear refusal to meet her, it is important to maintain composure and not show upset emotions. It is better to make efforts to get acquainted, even if they are unsuccessful, than to be inactive and regret.

Instructions for making a decision

The first thing you need to ask yourself is: do you like him? And the answer to this question should be as honest as possible, since all your future actions will depend on this. If a man is attracted to you and makes you want to get to know him better, well, it’s quite obvious that he’s lucky to attract mutual sympathy.

But it also happens that a handsome representative of the stronger sex seems to be attentive and invites you to an expensive restaurant, but something about him is alarming, causes a strange feeling and generally worries you. You definitely need to listen to your intuition; it’s unlikely that all these bells are ringing just like that.

It’s better not to agree to his invitation, but to take a closer look for some time. The bells only became louder, and the fan began to show inappropriate persistence? Well, apparently, his intuition was right, and something was wrong with him. In this case, the “lover” needs to be politely but firmly turned away so that he understands that the refusal is final and cannot be appealed.

Most likely, it will be difficult for you to do this, but it is important to still decide to take this step, because if you delay, unpleasant consequences may arise. At a minimum, the fan will decide that all this is pure coquetry, and will begin to show not the best sides of his character.

How to behave on a first date with a girl?

Next, a man needs to understand a few basic rules for himself on how to behave with a girl after meeting her, if she has agreed to a first date. It is here that the prospects of the relationship will be determined, since most often after the first date the girl understands whether she needs a man, and the man leaves the most important first impression about himself. Psychologists advise paying attention to several points:

• It is important to choose the right place for a meeting so that you can spend time comfortably and communicate without obstacles. You can clarify the girl’s preferences when communicating, but you shouldn’t forget about your own characteristics. For example, if a man is afraid of attractions, he will not be able to behave with dignity in such a place.
• A man needs to help the girl in every possible way to get rid of embarrassment and anxiety; you can use your sense of humor and say a couple of compliments about her appearance. It is important to conduct topics of conversation that she will understand, and therefore be able to maintain a conversation.
• It is important to behave confidently and calmly, without showing inner agitation. You can make a list of topics in advance for yourself in which both he and his companion will be competent.
• If you suddenly lose the thread of the conversation, and the man cannot find a new topic, you can turn the conversation on to it, being interested in her life, hobbies, occupation, etc. At the same time, it is better not to touch on some personal topics at the first meeting, be it past relationships or family matters.
• It is important to show your interest in the girl, to be gallant and polite, without using rude words, sarcasm or excessive familiarity. A girl will appreciate the naturalness, smiling and kindness of a man.

The same rules of conduct can be used with a girl friend if the man wants to please her and change the format of the relationship from friendship to romance. When meeting, it is better to present a small gift to show the generosity of your soul and the seriousness of your intentions towards the girl. These could be flowers, sweets that girls love so much, a small souvenir, the main thing is that the gift is inexpensive, otherwise the girl will consider the act to be bragging.

Infantile man

Therefore, you should not complain that your husband behaves like a child; perhaps, psychologically, he is a child. But it is in the nature of men to dominate, even if it is a man-son, this desire can be developed with special behavior. How to behave with your husband so that he stops being childish?

1. Gradually transfer small family responsibilities to him (paying bills, organizing a grocery basket), he may like it.
2. Talk to his mother so that she does not contribute to his immaturity.
3. Make fewer decisions yourself, wait for the last word from your husband.
4. Less interested in whether he has eaten or whether he is cold. This is an adult, he is capable of taking care of himself.
5. Don’t criticize, appreciate the very fact of trying to do something.

What should the conversations be about?

Many men do not approach the question of what to talk about with a girl on the first date so responsibly that they often encounter embarrassment and communication difficulties. In fact, psychologists advise thinking in advance about a list of neutral topics that would be interesting to both, without leading anyone into a dead end with awkward pauses. The main topics in which both are competent could be the following:

• favorite movies and music, based on this information you can plan new dates (going to the cinema or to a concert);
• men’s hobbies, thanks to which you can show your good sides;
• the girl’s hobbies, based on this information you can also come up with options for new meetings;
• the type of activity of the man and the girl;
• humor and funny stories from childhood that touch girls and make communication easy.

If a man feels reciprocal interest on the part of a girl and is confident in establishing contact with her, you can talk about love topics, but only superficially. You can ask a girl her views on family life, what kind of man she wants to see next to her, whether she likes romance, etc.

Important! Under no circumstances should you bring up conversations about former relationships or have conversations of a sexual nature on the first date, which can alienate and frighten the girl.

How to behave with your girlfriend so as not to lose her

Many men who are already in a relationship, during periods of crisis and coldness in a couple, ask questions such as “how to behave with a girl so that she is attracted to me” or “how to behave with a girl so as not to lose her.” Leading psychologists endorse such anxiety, offering several ways to improve relationships, namely:

• showing care even in the smallest things;
• maintaining passion in the intimate sphere;
• organizing dates and romantic surprises to combat routine;
• manifestation of affection and tenderness, despite masculinity and brutality;
• give compliments regularly;
• interest in her affairs, dreams and hobbies;
• building relationships with her parents and friends;
• the ability to listen is an important condition, even if the topics of her conversation are far from masculine;
• spending time together and doing things together strengthens relationships;
• truthfulness even in the smallest details;
• excessive criticism in her direction will be perceived as a manifestation of dislike.

Any manifestations of aggression towards her, humiliation and insults will lead to the end of the relationship. Even if the girl is wrong at some points, a man always needs to remain a gentleman, maintaining self-control.

How not to behave with any girl

Many men are so immersed in expert advice on how to behave with their girlfriend, with a younger girl, with a stranger, with their wife or girlfriend, that they forget about contraindications and prohibited techniques. At the same time, psychologists especially emphasize which men girls do not like, namely:

• Jonah;
• unconfident;
• miser;
• whiner;
• coward;
• a man with bad habits;
• immoral type.

It is contraindicated for a man to use rudeness, obscene language, vulgarity, aggression and cruelty towards a girl. Also, the girl will be turned away from her boyfriend by his excessive boasting, defiant behavior and disdainful attitude towards her. You shouldn’t use the same model of behavior with all girls, because due to different characters and temperaments, this trick can work with one lady, but with another it will be a huge failure.