How to choose a man
July 18
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Women are characterized by emotionality, which often interferes with the search for a chosen one. This applies to many factors, including:
- external attractiveness is rated higher than personal qualities and compatibility;
- love blocks the path to rationalism;
- dreams overshadow real facts;
- public opinion has too much influence on behavior.
Often it is intuition and feelings that help you accurately find the man of your life, but if this does not happen, you should think about other methods, including logic, observation, prudence and forecasting.
How to choose the right man
First of all, you need to decide on the goal - the methods for finding a one-night stand and for starting a family will be significantly different. If you want an unobtrusive romance, flirting and an interesting pastime, you don’t have to adhere to any conditions, except for basic safety rules. After all, every meeting is a new experience that will add to the collection of priceless memories.
But if we are talking about a life partner, it is already important to have a systematic approach and a clear understanding of which man to choose. There are a number of basic methods and paths.
There are plenty of options to get acquainted. We won’t discuss them; let’s move straight to deciding whether it’s worth building a relationship with this or that person.
Take a closer look at his family
Among the first indicators of how to choose a man are the behavior patterns of his parents, relationships between loved ones, and the degree of respect. There is a high probability of copying values, but there is also complete rejection of them. In any case, communication with relatives will provide a lot of useful information for thought.
Compare your social statuses
Social misalliance is one of the most common causes of problems in relationships. Although often women choose men from higher strata of society, and vice versa. But inconsistency can lead to a serious rift. This applies not only to financial status, but also to the level of culture and intelligence, religious affiliation, and adherence to national traditions.
It is also worth getting to know the chosen one’s friends - this is a reflection of many aspects of life, an indicator of aspirations and prospects. Friends have a great influence on a man; they can act as advisers and role models even in relationships. And you don’t need to indulge yourself with the illusion that he will leave the company for the sake of his family.
Attitude towards children
Among the many manuals about what kind of men women choose, one can find a common type: a loving and caring father, a breadwinner who will provide for and raise children. A large family really predominates in the dreams of young ladies, but modern girls may also not want children at all, insist on adoption, or have their own ideas about the roles in upbringing. These issues should be clarified in advance, since creating a full-fledged family includes only complete agreement in these aspects.
If you already have children from a previous relationship, this should be reported immediately; for many, this is a decisive factor in the further building of relationships.
Genetic approach
If there is a mutual desire to have common offspring, it is better to learn about chronic diseases, dangers, and family history. His appearance and habits will say a lot about a person without question. A good indicator is the desire to take care of health, interest in sports, proper nutrition and the presence of food culture in principle.
Similarity of interests and foundations
Everyone has their own taste - some men choose good housewives, some choose adventurers. This means that every girl can be loved and happy, it is only important to choose the right person who will be nearby and appreciate her merits and share her hobbies. A homebody rarely gets along with a traveler, and an extreme sports enthusiast rarely gets along with an overly cautious and timid lady.
Views on everyday life
Roles in housekeeping, habits, standard daily and weekly routines are trifles at first glance, but it is on these rocks that the boats of romantic love break. A good way to get to know a person better is to visit him without warning and assess the condition of his home. There is no need to hope for re-education or compromises - if a person is initially sloppy or accustomed to service - this is almost impossible to change.
Sexual temperament
It is tested exclusively in practice and after some time the relationship will invariably reach a stable level. Not only the methods and physical suitability must be satisfactory, but also the frequency of sexual activity. Many men who choose older women count on experience and self-confidence.
Attitude to money
The question of the family budget and the contribution of the parties to it. Equality or the main income of only one of the partners is possible. We are also talking about full maintenance - today it is considered quite normal for wealthy ladies to choose men younger than themselves and provide for them.
Attitude to life
Another reason why men choose older men is maturity of views and calmness, which is more often inherent in women with life experience. But often there is wisdom in young girls, it is only important to agree on worldviews, basic goals and values.
Influence on a companion
Your own feeling next to a man is one of the most important. The opinions that men choose beautiful people or men choose young people are partly true, but these characteristics are temporary, and we need to interest our partner for much longer.
If you have the opportunity to develop next to your chosen one, you want to grow personally and professionally, gain new emotions and skills - your life together will be rich and harmonious even after many years. This criterion must be followed if it is not clear how to choose between two men - you need someone who will not be a heavy burden in any aspect.
GuruTest
We all want to find our person, our soul mate, our ideal companion. Some people rely on intuition and gut instinct, while others turn to psychologists for advice. In their opinion, there are qualities in a man’s character that determine his ability to create long and happy relationships. Therefore, if you want to choose the right husband, follow our tips.
1. Give up value judgment and just feel. You met a man, what do you think about him? Imagine: all you have are feelings. What can you say about his kindness, care, loyalty, compliance, character? Will he be able to take care of you, help you, understand you? Ask yourself the questions that interest you most. Your feelings are the right guide in choosing a companion. You can reveal a lot more emotionally than by focusing on his appearance and his words.
2. Find out if he is trainable? There is the most important difference between a man who can become a faithful companion and a man who will play the role of a simple passerby - the ability to learn. Anyone who does not strive for self-development, who is not inquisitive, who divides the world only “into black and white” will not be able to give happiness.
3. Find strength and sensuality in it. Generally, a good man is a man who has some feminine qualities. Any woman needs attention, but a dry curmudgeon cannot show love. If you want to hear compliments not only on major holidays, pay attention to the man’s sensuality.
4. Try to look into his soul. There are many ways that men hide their feelings, and you may not realize that you have offended him in any way. It happens that a person went through stages of disappointment in a previous relationship and suffered emotionally from this. It is important not to be afraid to show your pain and feel someone else’s. A frank conversation will help both expose their “weak points,” which will reduce the likelihood of repeating fatal mistakes. Remember, you choose a man to live with, which means there is no point in masking sore spots and vulnerable spots.
5. Look for a man with hobbies. It doesn't matter what kind of hobby it is - playing the guitar or breeding spiders. Choose someone who is on their own path and sees you as a travel partner. In any relationship, people go through cycles when they want to merge into one whole and when there is a need to be distant. A passionate man will never claim your time, but at the same time he will give you new experience, broaden your horizons and help you find your purpose.
6. Choose a man with similar interests. Family, career, gender roles, religion - such things are recommended to be discussed before entering into legal marriage. Common goals can significantly reduce tension and reduce arguments.
7. Choose someone who knows how to laugh at themselves. Self-irony is a valuable quality that has long been identified by psychologists. An innocent joke can cause a loud scandal if a man is devoid of humor, which seriously complicates family life, overloading it with unnecessary problems and grievances.
8. Make sure your man makes your life better. Your partner should bring his energy, his love, his charge into your life. Trying to make you happy.
After carefully reading all the points, you should have a complete picture of the actions. These simple and practical tips will help you make the right choice. Of course, every girl intuitively knows what and how to do correctly, but this does not mean that you cannot try a different approach. Who knows, maybe this will help you find your happiness. Love yourself
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April 20 00:47
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When I asked her: “Why didn’t you try all this time to leave him alone until he sorted out his own morning?” She answered me: “I wanted to teach him to love.” She remained silent and understood everything. Woman, smart. I brought passion back into the relationship simply by seeing my partner’s needs.
Your intuition and attraction.
This is a very, very important selection criterion.
But..
If you really like a man, but all your acquaintances, friends, his friends say that you are “not a couple.” Take a closer look. What exactly do you not notice and will you be able to get along with it in the future? And vice versa. If you don’t like a man at all, but everyone says that this is just an ideal option. Give him a chance. Well, give love, receive love, and let this world become a better, happier and kinder place through you and your happy relationships. Put “LIKE” and write in the comments what filtering criteria you use.
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You look and think, “What’s wrong with him? Why should I be with him? What defects and shortcomings does it have? “Do I want him just because I’m ovulating? Or do I like it on other days too? ;)" And only then, understanding the whole objective picture, understanding and seeing a man as he is, you ask yourself, "And given all this, do I want to give him up? Do I want to entrust myself and my offspring to him?”
This, by the way, is characteristic not only of women; many animals’ s@mki filter out s@m’s in the same way. It’s clear that only after a man has passed all the tests of your “filtering” are you ready to trust him. Moreover, these tests can take place both at a conscious and, most likely, at an unconscious level. Once he has shown his readiness, you let him into your life.
This was all from the point of view of biology and physiology. But you and I are social and conscious creatures. Therefore, many different components intervene in natural selection. And the choice of women is very much biased in favor of the social. A huge number of women come to me precisely with the desire to marry a wealthy and successful man. The very idea of marrying a rich man seems to fit into the general system of security and survival of the family.
BUT…
There is indeed a very strong “but” in the criteria and choice of this particular path. I’m not talking about women from the “cute and heaven in the hut” category and for whom it is enough that he “doesn’t drink or beat.” I understand perfectly well that women’s ambitions are a natural process of development, both for a woman and for her man. Therefore, many see the result of satisfaction in the search for a wealthy partner.
I have been convinced more than a hundred times that this is almost always a losing option.
How many times do I hear similar stories, when a man meets a woman in a luxury Lexus or a luxury Mercedes, they have sex right in the same car, and then it turns out that it’s a car on credit or the boss’s. And marriage, because the man has a house, which, as it turned out later, is the house of his older brother. And a luxurious apartment, expensive gifts, and then it turns out that the person is superficial, he always has a new woman, and an emptiness sets in, in which you understand that you will never be the only one for him.
