- Should you invite a man first?
- If I ask him out for coffee, will he think it's a date?
- How to take initiative like a woman?
In one of the following articles I will talk about how to take initiative like a woman, and here I will show several incorrect examples of what not to do.
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Ways to ask a guy out on a date
If you want to offer the guy you like an interesting meeting, you need to think through everything carefully. It is advisable to mentally prepare for a date: prepare several interesting stories, choose a beautiful outfit, decide on a cultural program. It is important to know that there are several ways to take initiative.
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By hint
It is not necessary to speak openly about personal intentions right away. You can hint unobtrusively so that no one outside will notice. For girls, a big “weapon” in relationships with the opposite sex is the ability to speak in riddles and “make eyes.” With one look you can achieve more interest than with frank words. The main thing is that the hint is understood correctly. This way the girl becomes even closer and more interesting to the guy. A sincere smile and charming behavior work wonders.
If we're talking about an ex
It is possible to maintain a good relationship with a guy who is no longer yours. This is possible if trust has not been lost. Asking your ex to meet is sometimes difficult. After all, this means that you need to be able to overcome multiple grievances and misunderstandings. Sometimes it is so difficult to take the initiative, to show that you care about a person.
Not everyone manages to leave gracefully. As long as people remember mutual claims and are guided by negative feelings, it is unlikely that they will be able to understand each other. It is necessary to be able to go beyond one’s own claims and forget previous reproaches.
During correspondence
Today, social networks play a major role in interaction between people. Often young people are ready to communicate on Contact for days, finding a lot of interesting things in such a pastime. Interaction via the Internet has its own characteristics.
When communicating virtually, you need to remember the basic rules of etiquette. You cannot be rude, behave defiantly, or try to demonstrate anger and resentment. But deciding to ask a man out on a date becomes easier. After all, typing a few words or even sentences is easier than trying to say the same thing to a person in person. The main thing is to act delicately and carefully. It is important to find the right words and wait for the right moment.
Examples of SMS invitations
Sometimes it becomes difficult for girls to imagine how to correspond with a young man. It can be done using a mobile phone. This is a win-win option that allows you not to think about every phrase. You can write approximately the following texts:
"Hello! This is Masha (Katya, Lena). Would you like to go for a walk in the park tomorrow? I would be pleased to see you"
"Hello! A new film has been released. Maybe we can go to the cinema and then go for a walk? The weather is wonderful today, it’s a pity to miss the opportunity to relax and have a great time. I have an interesting story, you have an ice cream.”
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In person
Sometimes it happens to fall in love with your friend or work colleague. If your chosen one is often nearby, inviting him on a date becomes easier. This requires only the right attitude and a certain courage. Deciding to take you on a date is not difficult. You just need to express your intention in an original way. You can offer to go together to an interesting exhibition or accompany you to an event. The main condition is knowledge of the interests of the chosen one. You will have to take them into account and pay attention to your mood.
If it's a stranger
Many girls, at least once in their lives, find themselves in a situation where they like someone on the street. It all depends on momentary determination and willingness to prove yourself. You often have to act quickly, without thinking. You can ask a man out on a date, even if you are seeing him for the first time. There is nothing wrong with being the first to take the initiative. It is quite enough to approach, smile, focus on some object in order to start a conversation. It is very possible that the guy will continue to act on his own and say nice words. If not, then you can pluck up the courage and leave him your phone number.
Original options
To make the occasion memorable for a long time, you can try asking a guy on a date at the most inopportune moment. If he cares about you, he will certainly appreciate such an outburst of courage. For example, when you are in a classroom at an educational institution, you can send him a note.
It is also useful to turn to the young man with some request or for advice, and then invite the guy for a walk. For him to agree, it is enough to first spend time together.
You can escape your own fears
Each of us has a favorite logic problem called “What if?” You saw the man of your dreams and do not risk approaching him, because several questions were born in your head in a matter of seconds. What if he has a girlfriend? What if he didn't find me attractive enough? What if he laughs at me? These questions, which are dictated by your insecurities, can be continued endlessly.
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Waiting for the perfect time to talk creates a lot of empty space, but instead of positive thoughts, only fears creep into your head. Experts warn that if you take a passive position, it will keep your safety intact, but you will not get satisfaction. Most passive people just sit around and torture themselves. Take a step forward and you will have only two options: either “yes” or “no”. At least you have a 50 percent chance that you will continue communicating with this person further.
Choosing a place for an unforgettable date
If a girl wants to take the relationship in a serious direction in the future, she will have to try hard first. If you see your chosen one as your future husband, then you cannot retreat. It is important to know where to go and where to focus your attention. The meeting should please both and be truly pleasant.
In the warm season
In summer and spring you can find many reasons to get out of the house. A walk in the park or participation in various attractions is suitable. It’s useful to go horseback riding together or go to the river. Having received joyful impressions, you will no longer want to stop there.
In rainy weather
When the sun goes down, there is no reason to stay at home. If you are in a good mood, then it is not a sin to take advantage of this circumstance. It's time to find a seat in a good cafe. Pleasant music, tasty food and positive emotions are what you need for an unforgettable evening. You can supplement the meeting with colorful stories.
During the winter months
It is known that in severe frosts you can’t really go for a walk. If you still want to invite a guy somewhere, then you shouldn’t give up the prospect itself. In winter, you can spend a wonderful romantic evening with a cup of tea in your apartment. The main thing is to find a suitable reason so that the chosen one does not refuse in advance. Alternatively, you should invite him to fix the TV, while hinting that a tasty treat awaits him afterwards.
Unconventional ideas
If you really want something unforgettable, you can try to surprise your chosen one. A parachute jump, a trip to a camp site or an active ski holiday will lift both your spirits. It is only important to find out the interests of the young man in advance so that they coincide with yours. Otherwise, there is a high probability of scaring the guy. You need to act softly, gracefully, but at the same time not lose your presence of mind. Any determination is welcome.
Women have the opportunity to be natural
The more initiated acquaintances a woman has on her record, the more naturalness men will experience. Representatives of the stronger sex crave sincere communication and, as a rule, respond in kind. When a woman makes the first move, she may not play other people's roles or do what her gentleman expects of her. She retains her individuality, which is a big plus.
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How to behave in case of refusal
Sometimes it happens that the guy you like actually refuses you. And then secret fears come true, a feeling of one’s own insignificance appears. In this case, it is important for the girl to find support and try to understand some things. The main thing is not to upset yourself even more. You must try to maintain peace of mind at all costs. After all, the future depends on a positive attitude. Often people cannot find a way out of the current situation only because they do not find the moral strength to do so.
- You can't be humiliated. Of course, you want to invite a guy for a walk so that he doesn’t refuse. But if this happened, there is no point in tearing your hair out. Mental well-being is worth a lot. The psychology of the stronger sex is such that they do not like to be persuaded and insisted on. If a girl begs for a date, she loses her attractiveness in the eyes of her chosen one. It turns out that it is better to endure an insult once than to constantly suffer and worry.
- Don't write angry text messages. Expressing negative emotions momentarily will not help. Understand that you cannot achieve favor through an obsessive attitude. For a guy to agree, you need to become bright for him and be able to make the right impression. Negative influences make the situation worse rather than solve it. When an invitation to a romantic date is rejected, the right thing to do would be to try to forget about it. You can try, through an effort of will, to switch your attention to self-development.
- Express emotions. Most girls, experiencing unrequited love, do not seek help from a psychologist. Experiencing the feeling alone, many do not even realize how much they are hurting themselves. So it's not far from depression. The need to love yourself and listen to your true needs has been proven by psychologists. It is useful to overcome anxious feelings. You can write poetry, draw, or chat with a friend you trust. The main thing is not to be afraid to go and discover the depth of your experiences. A person cannot find happiness without inner harmony.
Thus, asking a guy out on a date does not mean winning his favor. It is important to be friendly, proactive and open. Acquaintance should develop naturally, without pressure. It is advisable not to insist on anything and remain calm.
Territory for the operation
When a girl invites a guy on a date, the place and time need to be chosen wisely. If a boy is popular among his peers, a lot of people constantly revolve around him, and in the company of his friends he may give a reaction that is not typical for him, so as not to lose his authority in their eyes. Therefore, you need to “catch” him on the so-called neutral territory, preferably making an offer to go on a date together without witnesses. After all, this in itself is a delicate matter and no one needs to know what is so personal you are talking about.
It's best to choose a neutral, casual environment where you both will feel most comfortable and there won't be any pressure on him. Pressure refers to the appraising glances of friends and comrades, in front of whom the object of your dreams does not want to look like an embarrassed boy in love who has found himself in an awkward situation. And if he is not in love, so much the worse, because if there is no tact, the boy will make a stupid joke about you after hearing the proposal.
Place options for voicing the invitation:
The courtyard of a school, technical school, university (if you study together). The yard in which the target's company usually walks. In the gym after or before training (if you go to dancing, ballet, wrestling, or any other club together).
When a place has been found, you have seen your crush, make sure that no casual listener will witness your delicate, exciting conversation. If you find a boy in a company, if possible, go up to him and try to lead him aside with one of these phrases: “Can I have a few words with you?”, “Can you step away for a minute?”, “Please give me a couple of minutes.”
A guy can be shy
Has it ever occurred to you that a guy is also terrified of being rejected or is speechless at the sight of a pretty person? He may be afraid of the ridicule of his friends or not confident in his own eloquence and charm. If the man who interests you is an introvert by nature, you will wait for years, but he will never deign to show his sympathy. With this scheme, your initiative will be your salvation, and he will be flattered by your attention.
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