Why people with a good sense of humor always become the life of the party

Why does a person need to be funny? This question can be answered in different ways. But, one way or another, any of the answers will lead us to the fact that humor is important in any area of our lives, and is also highly valued by others. If a person has a sense of humor and wit, life is much easier for him than for someone who does not.

People with a poorly developed sense of humor are often rational and straightforward, which is why they often have difficulties with social adaptation and communication. For such people, even minor troubles end in stress. But if there is a sense of humor, then psychological defense mechanisms perform their functions much more effectively. Agree: how nice it would be if we could always easily perceive what is happening and find something funny in any situation? This is one of the reasons why many people want to develop a sense of humor.

But the benefit is not only that people who know how to laugh in the broad sense of the word perceive even the most difficult life situations much more calmly, but also that they establish contact with other people faster and easier. And this can be called the second, but no less important reason. Who do you think is easier to communicate with: a shy, insecure and timid guy or someone who knows how to make funny jokes in a company, laugh at themselves, amuse them, and attract the attention of the opposite sex with a cool joke? In our opinion, the answer is obvious.

The benefits of a developed sense of humor can be listed for a very long time, but we think that the two discussed are quite enough to draw certain conclusions, although we will talk about the benefits of humor later. In the meantime, let's think: is it even possible to develop a sense of humor and wit? Does a person who has never been able to joke or was generally characterized by gloom and lack of cheerfulness have a chance to change and let positivity into their consciousness? We have bad news for you - this won't happen overnight. But we also have good news - if you want, you can do this, and you don’t have to move mountains!

Of course, there is no doubt that a sense of humor is transmitted in genes. However, this is not at all a reason to give up on yourself if your ancestor was not Mikhail Zadornov or Charlie Chaplin. After a person is born, the development of a sense of humor already depends on the characteristics of the environment where he grows up, the subtleties of upbringing and other conditions. But we do not set ourselves the task of getting into the very jungle of influences that reality has on human consciousness.

We want to say that anyone at almost any age can develop a sense of humor and learn to be funny. All that is required for this is to learn the basic laws of the comic as such, and study practical information, including techniques, methods and methods for developing a sense of humor. And this information is right in front of you - in the course, the introduction to which you are now reading.

Our online course on developing a sense of humor consists of six lessons with a lot of theoretical and practical information, interesting examples and exercises, available for practical use from the first minutes of study. Plus, we have selected many examples of jokes, which will allow you to clearly see how to joke in general, what you should take into account and what you should pay attention to on your way to mastering the skill of a comedian. So don't waste your time and keep reading.

What is a sense of humor

A sense of humor

call a psychological feature of a person, which consists in identifying all kinds of contradictions in the surrounding world and their subsequent assessment from a comic point of view. It begins to manifest itself and develop already in early childhood under the influence of the environment, comic manifestations of other people, funny situations and other prerequisites. If there are no such prerequisites, a person develops a straightforward character, which can lead to many social and psychological difficulties.

Thus, we can conclude that a sense of humor allows a person to:

It is easier to cope with difficulties, problems and difficult life circumstances
Find common language with others faster
Find like-minded people in society
Don't be too serious

Interestingly, entire studies are devoted to the sense of humor. In many of them, scientists tried to measure the sense of humor of different people, and also relate it to other personality characteristics.

Assessments have been made (and continue to be made) from the perspective of psychology, sociology, linguistics, anthropology and other scientific disciplines. And among hundreds of theories of humor, there are those that say that the task of a sense of humor is to relieve tension and stress, as well as encourage the search for new interpretations of life situations. Based on these theories, all jokes are accompanied by increasing attention as they are presented and a subsequent release when the joke ends. The reason for the emergence of new interpretations is that jokes entail unexpected associations of unrelated and even conflicting circumstances.

There are also theories in which humor serves as a means of defusing aggression and negative emotions. Although in certain circles, for example, among military personnel, doctors, officials, criminals, etc. has its own, special humor, from which it follows that the sense of humor is to one degree or another subjective.

In general, a sense of humor should be understood as the ability to see the funny in situations, people, environments, stories, etc. The protective function of humor is highlighted by almost all researchers.

But let’s summarize: one of the authoritative researchers of humor, Bogdan Dzemidok, in his work “On the Comic,” focusing on the social role of humor, defines several of its main functions:

Cognitive function. Humor is interpreted as a means of understanding the world and mastering ideas about it. Humor, which is considered to have the greatest educational value, shows reality in its true light, without deforming its phenomena or trying to modify it. The cognitive component of humor deepens a person’s knowledge about the world and other people, teaches them to identify differences between the content of phenomena and their form, and also warns against hasty conclusions.
Entertainment function. Everything is simple here - humor has the ability to lift your spirits and cause laughter and positive emotions.
Therapeutic function. It consists in the ability of humor to be a consolation for a person in his personal disappointments and failures. Self-irony is a form of protection both from outside influence and from oneself, i.e. from your own pessimism, despondency, fears, doubts, etc.

But it would not be superfluous to say about another function of humor, which the famous German poet and playwright Gotthold Ephraim Lessing once spoke about:

Educational function. Healthy humor serves as a measure of moral development, and therefore through it one can instruct, teach and educate children.

All this is just basic information about the sense of humor, and if you go into this topic in more detail, you can collect a large amount of data looking at it from all sides and angles. If you are interested in this topic, the Internet and libraries with dozens of encyclopedias are at your service. We will continue the conversation about the practical side of using a sense of humor.

A sense of humor in practice

After all that has been said above, you probably will not argue with the fact that a sense of humor is one of the most important qualities that a person should have. But it still makes sense to say a few more words about its practical application.

First of all, I would like to point out that it allows you to very quickly win over your interlocutor, and it doesn’t matter: it’s a girl or guy you like, a potential business partner, a work colleague, or a simple plumber who disgruntledly came into the house to change the toilet.

A person who can skillfully and colorfully joke will always be distinguished by his wit and attract attention, start a company, and bring a positive attitude to society. Among other things, a sense of humor can also be attributed to the qualities of a leader and someone who will often, if not always, be listened to and his opinion taken into account.

But having a sense of humor means not only being able to joke and make witticisms, but also understanding the humor of other people, being receptive to jokes directed at oneself, having the ability to behave comically, fend off caustic remarks and save face in any tricky situation. It is also advisable to have the skill of expressing humor in writing and even in drawings - these are tangible bonuses for those who have a good tongue.

A practical sense of humor is also the ability to distinguish one form of the comic from another. For example, can you distinguish irony from sarcasm, jokes from banter, stand-up comedy from miniatures? An experienced comedian is familiar with many comic forms, genres and techniques.

As a result, in order to safely consider yourself a witty person with a good sense of humor, you need to have a number of certain qualities, namely: quick reaction, developed thinking (by the way, look here), an ironic attitude and a positive perception of the environment, self-confidence. For some, a sense of humor is a gift, but for people who work on themselves, it is just another skill that they are able to master. But this needs to be done not anyhow, not spontaneously, not chaotically, but regularly, consciously and systematically. If you have firmly decided for yourself that you want to learn how to joke and improve the quality of your sense of humor, then you are on the right path - we will tell you about everything you need to do.

How to develop a sense of humor, ways

Make fun friends, be friends with fun people

Surely, you know such people - funny people who could potentially become mentors in this fun business. Make friends with a fun company.

In general, in most cases, a good sense of humor is inherent in ordinary people who have not completed special courses in comedy arts. So how do they know how to react to make it funny? Everything is very simple. It turns out that jokers in life are always open and sociable people who have many friends. And they acquired their skills to be funny thanks to such groups!

Hysterical laughter: laugh until your stomach hurts

Life hits you, and you want to burst into hysterical laughter. Don't hold back, laugh through your tears.

Have you ever wondered: why, when we are on the verge of a nervous breakdown, we want to laugh hysterically? Answer: this is how the body wants to relieve nervous tension in the best way in the world, in a way better than the best medicines. While laughing, the body's endurance increases many times over!

The hardships of life: appreciate Her Majesty's joke - Life

Life is hard, you have no time for jokes. Find something funny in this situation.

This case is related to the point above. A good explanation was given earlier in this article: about what happiness is. Try to distance yourself from your worries, or find something funny in this situation. The purpose of this whole “exercise” is to evoke at least a small hint of awareness of the humorousness of the situation; try to notice that life has its own special sense of humor!

Put on a Comedian costume

Memorize new jokes and anecdotes to amuse those around you

All cheerful people have a “gentlemanly” set of jokes, funny stories, curiosities, anecdotes. Get one like this. The only rule is that this “set” itself should make you smile.

Read, watch and listen to everything that contains humor

Make it a rule: every day, at least a joke, either from funny literature, or from films, audio recordings (audio works well - listening to it on the way to work).

This exercise will also help well with the previous point - to collect a stock of hilarious stories for your new role. Train your mind to get used to jokes. Like any ability, a sense of humor is like a good habit that is developed over time and consistency in performing appropriate actions on oneself.

Smile more often, put on a smile

Go to the mirror and put on a smile

Like the previous point, this is a daily exercise to train your sense of humor. Try to give your face a natural look so that your smile is natural and not grinning, as if you want to eat someone. In fact, many of us cannot even smile beautifully. Remember how kids smile - imitate them!

Affirmations to improve your sense of humor

Repeat affirmations:

Every day I become happier
A sense of humor accompanies me throughout life
I am easy to communicate with others
I breathe positivity
I love fun and noisy companies
I shine with wit and jokes
(compose yours as per this link)

About affirmation and its power. Still, I am sure, from a psychological point of view, that the shorter the affirmation, the better. The above listed affirmations, as you might guess, are not just for developing a sense of humor, they are also suitable for feeling more confident and happier.

Running to the circus circle

Enroll in relevant courses to develop your sense of humor.

The best effect will be if you and your friend or friends do this together. The effect of such courses cannot be underestimated. The only thing is, from all the variety (if there is such a thing, if not, then read point 1) choose what will suit you. It’s stupid to sign up for circus hoop or flexibility courses if you’re a 120 kg “baby.” Although….

Smile, laugh and enjoy life!

How to learn it

There is no doubt: the ability to develop a sense of humor and use it to benefit yourself and others does not come out of nowhere. Of course, some people are great at humor and entertaining others and themselves from an early age, because heredity is heredity. Such people, by the way, very often devote their lives to humor and become professional comedians, and they don’t have to learn to be funny (although even they hone their skills and improve their skills, as they say now). The rest need to work to “catch fish out of the pond”, try, study and develop. But there is no need to perceive this process as an impassable obstacle - you can learn everything, and on your own - if you have the desire.

As with any other topic, there are two sides to developing a sense of humor:

Theoretical side - includes information of a theoretical nature required to create a basis for practice
The practical side is the use of theoretical information in practical activities

The difficulty, however, often lies in the fact that many people, having mastered the theory, give up what they started halfway and never move on to practice. And the reason here lies not only in the individual characteristics of each person. The fact is that any training course, any training, any theoretical material should be created with a basis for subsequent practice. Otherwise, knowledge will simply gather dust on the shelves of memory, become covered with cobwebs, be pushed into far corners and will not bring any benefit.

Guided by this idea, we have developed the presented course on developing a sense of humor. We pursue two goals: the first is to provide you with high-quality material for reading and studying, and the second is to teach you how to use it in life. Therefore, each of the course lessons is distinguished by a two-way focus: they contain both theory, without which practice is simply impossible, and practice - tips, recommendations, exercises and techniques - tools for moving from words to deeds.

Want to test your knowledge?

If you want to test your theoretical knowledge on the topic of the course and understand how suitable it is for you, you can take our test. For each question, only 1 option can be correct. After you select one of the options, the system automatically moves on to the next question.

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How to develop wit: useful tips

To develop mental acuity, you will have to put in a lot of effort, but I am confident that you will succeed. My useful tips will be a good help:

Expand your horizons. Read as many books as possible by writers who introduced humor and irony into their works. For teaching, I recommend humorous literature by the following authors: Ilf and Petrov, Zoshchenko, Chekhov, Bernard Shaw, Bulgakov. You can listen to audiobooks or read, but the most important thing is to notice jokes and witty phrases. Of course, it won’t hurt to watch humorous films, TV series and programs.
Practice. Without practice, wit cannot be developed. Try to make sharp and subtle jokes whenever the opportunity arises. Don't forget that a joke works well if it has the effect of surprise.
Laugh at yourself. Yes, I agree that this is not the most pleasant thing, because we all have our own complexes. But this is precisely the technique used by famous comedians who make the audience laugh until they cry. Yes, they are witty, thanks to the fact that they use self-irony.
Forget about stereotypes. A witty person finds very quickly what to say, and you will have to learn to abandon the cliches and stereotypes inherent in society. To develop wit, you need to use your imagination and speech, look for associations, turn familiar situations around and see the funny in them.
Live life with humor. A person with a sharp mind cannot be gloomy and boring. If you have a good wit, then you will always be the center of attention in any company, you will have many friends, and people will come to you for advice. Look at the familiar in a new way and find something funny, then they will also say about you that you have an innate talent for making jokes in any situation.

Remember that every joke has its own time, so it’s not enough to learn how to write jokes, make jokes and humor, it’s important to learn how to do it at the right moment. As an exercise, I recommend that you play associations and apply basic techniques to develop wit from scratch

Wit is the muscle of the sense of humor

Here are some more recommendations for those who want to be witty:

memorize jokes and funny phrases;
use metaphors and phraseological units;
do not show negative emotions in public;
look for relationships between people, animals, plants and different situations;
learn to draw caricatures;
Laugh at a joke, even when you don't find it very funny.

Of course, jokes should not flow from you, because you are not a clown! Remember the saying: “Rarely, but accurately.” This is exactly what you should do when inserting some sharp phrase into a conversation. I conduct special training on developing a sense of humor and wit, and I can say with confidence that any skill can be developed. You can read more about training at the Comedy School in the Training section.

Lessons in humor

We already have a lot of courses and trainings in our arsenal, and we have good experience in developing and compiling training methods. It has already become a tradition for the 4Brain team to conduct case studies, systematize the material, select the most important and interesting from a huge number of sources, adapt the received data for easy perception and quick application, and give it all a beautiful form. We did exactly the same thing now.

In the next six lessons we will look at the most significant topics in our opinion regarding the development of a sense of humor, the most effective techniques, tips from professional comedians and easy-to-use exercises.

Lesson 1. Theories of humor and the nature of the comic

If there is a task to approach the development of a sense of humor competently and fully, it is imperative to learn about the nature of the comic, what theories of humor there are, how it is interpreted by researchers and scientists. Such knowledge forms a correct understanding of the funny and its adequate perception, and also serves as wonderful food for the mind.

In the first lesson we will tell you about the ideas of psychologists and philosophers such as Rod Martin, Thomas Hobbes, Théodule Ribot, Charles Gruner, Francois Rabelais and others. You will learn about the psychoanalytic theory of humor, the theory of arousal and comfort, the theory of superiority and humiliation, the theory of incongruity and other theories. In conclusion, we will briefly summarize the entire lesson material.

Lesson 2. Positive thinking as the basis of a sense of humor

It is difficult to call a person who is used to thinking in a negative way someone who has a good sense of humor. Due to the peculiarities of his perception, he is inclined to see in the events happening to him and the world around him mainly what causes fear, anger, resentment, hatred, a sense of injustice, etc. in him. All this suggests that the first step towards developing a sense of humor is the formation of positive thinking.

From the second lesson you will learn what the essence of positive thinking is and get acquainted with various techniques for its formation: substitution, elimination, power of thought, self-irony. We will also offer a set of practical recommendations and rules of positive thinking for every day.

Lesson 3. Types and techniques of comic

Anyone can tell a couple of jokes. However, a true humorist is a person who is able to “juggle” his sense of humor, presenting it in different forms; someone who knows how to see and identify different situations and adapt to them; someone who understands how to make a joke so that the maximum result is achieved. And you can learn all this only by knowing about the types and techniques of the comic.

After completing the third lesson, you will learn how a joke, anecdote, irony, oxymoron, satire and parody differ from each other, and you will see clear examples of each of these types. In the second part we will talk about basic techniques, and in conclusion you will be offered several exercises and recommendations for practicing skills based on the information received.

Lesson 4. Developing wit

Wit can be described as the “muscle” of the sense of humor. If she is undeveloped or even atrophied, her sense of humor will certainly be weak, but if she is strong and alive, even a couple of your words can cause an explosion of laughter and win dozens of people over to you. A sense of humor and wit are two facets of one whole, and one is impossible without the other.

The fourth lesson is divided into three parts. In the first, we will present more than a dozen recommendations for developing wit. In the second, we'll introduce five great techniques, each of which is accompanied by examples. And in the third, we’ll arm you with eight cool exercises that will help you become a real wit.

Lesson 5. What you can’t joke about and what the success of the joke depends on

The success of a joke is not always due to technique, originality, surprise or timing. An important factor is the topic on which a person jokes, because if you joke about something that is not customary to joke about, the joke will be unsuccessful, and the joker himself will most likely find himself in a very disadvantageous and unenviable position.

In Lesson 5, we'll cover the main topics that professional comedians and humorists avoid and explain why they are so. In addition, you will learn what to pay attention to when writing jokes and during the joke itself. And as a supplement, there will be excellent recommendations intended for beginning pranksters.

Lesson 6. Comic forms

In addition to the fact that there are different types and techniques of the comic, there are also many forms in which jokes are generally presented to the public. Simply put, when performing on stage with a humorous act, you won’t be able to get away with one anecdote, while a short story will work just fine in a friendly company. Likewise, it would hardly be appropriate to show an interesting skit to a friend at a bus stop, but it would be perfect for performing in public.

The sixth lesson is devoted to the forms of the comic. In it, of course, we will not consider their entire diversity, but will touch only on the most popular forms in our time. More specifically, we will present you with sketch, stand-up, miniature, humorous games and one man show. And by clicking on additional links, you can see examples of performances by artists in these forms.

Course authors:

Kirill Nogales and Evgeny Buyanov

How to take classes

As already mentioned, our humor lessons are completely adapted for practical activities, and are also suitable for anyone who wants to develop a sense of humor. However, our task is to give you the base, and only you are responsible for what you do with it. We are talking about the fact that you can take at least a hundred courses and fill your head with a bunch of information, but still not do anything worthwhile in your life. Therefore, try to project everything from the area of knowledge into the area of action.

To make it more convenient for you to complete the course, break this process into several stages. You can do this - study two lessons during the week:

One day - study the first lesson
Two days – applying knowledge in practice
One day - rest
Further - according to the same scheme

Of course, this is just an example, and you have every right to come up with your own system that is more suitable for your employment. The only thing we want to point out again is that it is important to go through the lessons very carefully and with an understanding of why you are doing it.

As for the practical component of the course (exercises, techniques, tips, recommendations, etc.), they imply not just a single repetition, but multiple repetitions - this is the only way you can fully master the material, consolidate and hone the acquired skills.

Try to develop a useful habit of reminding yourself that you are developing a sense of humor and learning to joke, then in real life you will not have any problems with experiments on this topic. With practice, the application of knowledge will become automatic, and the need for careful self-control will disappear by itself.

We would like to complete the introduction to the course with statements from famous personalities about the sense of humor. For some, they will become an additional incentive for self-development, while others will simply enjoy them and broaden their horizons.

Practical exercises for every day

Humor is in some ways comparable to muscles: it can be pumped up with daily exercise. The more often and intensely the training, the faster the desired quality develops. The main criterion for the usefulness of classes is regularity. It’s better to practice a little every week than to spend two full days on developing humor and abandon it for six months.

Among the practical exercises that best develop a sense of humor are the following:

search for associations - select any subject and find 5-10 things or phenomena that are associated with it. Analyze what (by what criteria) each specific association was caused;
literary practice - repeat the school curriculum on literature, remembering stylistic figures: metaphors, hyperboles, puns, etc. Regularly come up with your own examples for each of them;
Practice versification - humor often comes across better in poetic form. What seems unfunny in an ordinary sentence becomes funny when there is rhyme;
come up with purposes for objects - pick up a book and find 15 ways to use it. Then repeat the same exercise with a hammer, pen, rolling pin, or other object.

This practice helps to awaken unconventional creative thinking.

To develop this skill, it is useful to come up with comments for photographs. At first, they don’t even have to be funny, because the main goal of this exercise is to develop attentiveness. Notice the details in each photo, evaluate the plot, color composition and generally everything you see. Over time, you will learn to fish out logical inconsistencies and paradoxes. It is enough to focus the attention of others on them so that they also laugh at the object of your insight.

Exercises to develop a sense of humor