What helps a person become human | Reading lesson plan (grade 4):

home >> books on success and wealth >> Million-dollar habits (Tracy Bryan) >> How to become a person worthy of respect
Thoughts lead to goals; goals continue into action; actions form habits; habits determine character; Character Determines Our Destiny Trayon Edwards

Almost everything we have or will have in the future is determined by our thoughts, feelings and behavior. At the same time, many psychologists are convinced that 95% of our thoughts, feelings and deeds are determined by our habits. Therefore, to achieve success, you need to develop success habits that will inevitably lead to what you are destined for.

Fortunately, it's never too late to acquire the necessary habits. If you have bad habits or haven't developed the habits necessary to reach your full potential, don't despair. You can always learn desired behaviors through regular practice and repetition.

Good habits are hard to learn, but easy to live with. At the same time, bad habits are easily learned, but they don’t make life any easier. In any case, as soon as you acquire a particular habit, it becomes almost invisible to you. It easily and quickly penetrates into thoughts, feelings and actions that correspond to your image of an ideal person.

What is a “good person”?

Before getting to the heart of the matter, namely, how to become a good person, it is important to understand what you are striving for. What is a good person?

Is it really only the one who doesn’t wish bad things on anyone or the one who wants positivity exclusively for himself and his loved ones? But life shows the shortcomings of both the first and second categories of people: the first so selflessly believe in goodness that they are literally ready to die for this faith, while others turn into ardent “fighters against evil”, who, in fact, are driven by hatred, and by themselves to yourself.

The main aspects of the “traps” of good are as follows:

if there were no good, humanity would not know what evil is. Therefore, if you want to become “more normal,” then do everything to find this balance - and then the people around you will change, and, therefore, the attitude towards them. Moreover, you need to act with real deeds, and not with empty stories about “how good I am.” To be, not to appear, is the main rule.
kindness craves attention and praise.
Isn’t it true that very often, having done something good, we almost subconsciously wait for the reaction of others to a good deed, be it helping a neighbor in an important matter or a hundred “thrown off” to a charity fund. There is also a downside: publicly scolding yourself if you unintentionally make a mistake. Also, at any opportunity, reproach others “I would never do this, it’s low/mean/not Christian!” (Underline whatever applicable). But indulging your vanity is, in principle, not good. So what now, don’t even open your mouth? Not necessarily: just try to learn to take care of yourself and, if you make a mistake, correct it immediately.
a good person will certainly tell you about the reasons for his good deeds. They can be different: from selfless help to compensation for moral debt. But it is important to remember that the debt of gratitude (he did good to me, and I simply cannot repay the same!) cannot be redeemed.

Leave the past in the past

If you want to become a different person, change your philosophy and worldview. Give up outdated concepts. They are the ones who prevent you from becoming what you dream of. Every word heard from my parents and loved ones shaped my view of myself and the world around me. And, unfortunately, the attitude of relatives is not always objective and helps a person become more self-confident. Therefore, to achieve success in life, start by developing your own assessment of your personality and the world around you. Give up other people's principles that were imposed, develop your own view of the world. Sometimes this is enough to get rid of self-doubt, love yourself and become a different person.

To feel the pleasure of life, do not deny yourself the right to hobbies and interests. Don't listen if others criticize you for it. The main thing is that they bring pleasure and give joy, but at the same time they should not interfere with your path to success by taking up time. The best option would be when your hobby helps you take a break from work or becomes a source of income, allowing you to devote more time to your development.

If you want to change yourself, understand: “Who are you?”, “What kind of person?”, “What benefit can you bring to the world?” After all, why do you want to become a different person and why. Lack of understanding of your capabilities, your own value for yourself and others often becomes an obstacle to success.

Where to begin?

To understand how to become a good person, first of all, you need:

Erase your own past, like an eraser from a sheet of paper: until you do this, you will not be able to change. You must let go of your mistakes, if you want, repent before God, and simply tell yourself: “Yes, I was wrong, I didn’t want to be, but that life is over, a new page has begun.” Do this until only positive moments remain in your memory.
Eliminate bad habits.
Isn't it true that a bad person in the understanding of the majority is one who is impolite, conflictual, dishonest, selfish and rude? Then, if you catch yourself at the slightest manifestation of these qualities, try to do the opposite. For example, if you want to say a rude word, try to answer politely; If you want to turn around and leave without listening to the person, step over your pride and try to be imbued with compassion for your neighbor. Yes, sometimes it is very difficult, especially at first, it will take a lot of time to “adapt.” But kindness is nothing more than daily work on yourself.
Protect yourself from negative information flow. In practice this can be done by:
- minimizing contacts with “toxic” people, i.e. those who love foul language, swearing, constant complaints and accusations of others “of all mortal sins”;
watching good films, reading good books, communicating with purposeful people, interesting hobbies that bring positivity and inspire optimistic, bright thoughts.
Learn to do good unselfishly, without demanding anything in return. Believe me, the Universe itself will return everything to you with interest, but for now, don’t focus on how to become a good person, but try to just be. Those who do not judge, those who try to hold back shouting at their subordinates, those who respect the elderly.

How to buy them?

Conclude an agreement with a broker, bank or investment company. It's free. They must have a license to trade securities.
Open a securities account. For example, in PrivatBank, opening an account costs 300 UAH (electronic account) and 500 UAH through a manager at a bank branch. Monthly account maintenance costs 50 UAH.

Government bonds are sold on the primary and secondary markets. In the secondary market, the players are brokers, exchanges and ordinary investors. You can invest in government bonds in any amount from 1000 UAH. But taking into account the associated costs, the tool is suitable for those who are ready to invest at least 50,000 UAH. Otherwise, commissions will simply “eat up” your income.

There are also dollar government bonds with a yield of 2-3% per annum, but they are not very interesting. True, the profit on foreign currency deposits is even lower - from 0.01% to 2.5% per annum maximum.

Profitability: ≈ 10% for a year and 7% for three months.

Minimum investment: 50,000 UAH.

How to use the tool: enter into an agreement with a securities dealer - open a securities account - buy.

What should you strive for?

Do a little “kindness” (or “niceness”, whichever you prefer) every day. Just get into this habit, akin to regularly brushing your teeth in the morning. Today it could be helping a colleague “appease” the boss, tomorrow it could be feeding a stray animal. Any, even the most insignificant little thing, is marked with a “+” sign.
Regularly, in accordance with personal financial capabilities, for example, once a month, send funds to charitable purposes. This does not have to be a sum with three zeros, your concern is important.
Listen to others and empathize with others.
Abstract from prejudices and stereotypes, ranging from racial and national, to such aspects as religion and knowledge of language.
Be more tolerant of people, especially of other people's shortcomings. Regardless of whether you are a believer or not, remember the phrase: “Who among us is not without sin”?
Just love, and in the broad sense of this verb. Starting small - love only for family and friends - learn to feel the profession and language, small and large Motherland. Remember that a truly good person is alien to such feelings as irritation, envy and cruelty.

Seven steps to a new habit

1. Make a decision

Clearly decide for yourself that you will follow the chosen direction in everything. For example, if you decide to get up early and do morning exercises, train yourself to set an alarm for a specific time. When you hear the bell, immediately get up, put on your tracksuit and start exercising.

2. Don't make any exceptions

During the period of formation of a new habit, give up any exceptions. Don't look for or invent excuses for yourself. Don't cut yourself any slack. If you decide to get up every morning at 6 o'clock, train yourself to get up at 6 until it becomes automatic.

3. Tell your friends about it

Let people around you know that you are going to change your behavior in one way or another. It's amazing how disciplined it is to know that others are watching to see if you have the willpower to pass the test.

4. Create a mental image

Constantly visualize yourself following the decision you made. The more often you introduce yourself to a new habit, the faster it will be accepted by your subconscious and become automatic.

5. Validate your success

Repeat your decision to yourself over and over again, as if you have already achieved its unconditional implementation. This repetition significantly increases the speed of formation of a new habit. For example, you can tell yourself: “I get up every morning at exactly 6 o’clock and not a minute later!” Be sure to repeat these words before falling asleep. This will almost certainly help you wake up a few minutes before your alarm goes off, and you'll soon be able to do without it.

6. Be persistent in your decision

Continue practicing the new behavior until it becomes automatic and part of your daily routine. As a result, you should feel uncomfortable when you don't do what you decide to do.

7. Reward yourself

It is very important to reward yourself in one way or another for diligence. Each time you reward yourself, you validate and reinforce the new behavior. Soon you subconsciously begin to associate this behavior with the pleasure of the reward. You will create for yourself the positive consequences that you subconsciously strive for as a result of your chosen behavior.

How to overcome hesitation

Procrastination is a problem for almost all people. By learning to overcome hesitation in one activity or another, you can improve the rest of your life. The seven steps described above will help you with this.

First, make a decision to move towards your main goal every day. Second, do not make any exceptions until the habit is firmly established. Third, tell everyone you know that you are going to stop hesitating on this or that issue. Fourth, create a mental image of yourself when you begin a task and maintain it until the habit is fully formed. Fifth, constantly repeat to yourself: “I am already working on solving my main problem.” Sixth, force yourself every day to do what you decide until this action becomes automatic. And seventh, reward yourself every time you overcome hesitation and complete important work. In the future, practice this procedure for any new habits you want to develop.

Make developing new habits a part of your regular life. As soon as possible, try to pick up a new habit that may be useful to you. One new habit per month results in 12 habits every year and 60 every five years. Move at this pace, and your life will radically change for the better, allowing you to become a completely different person.

The rule of three “NOTs”, or how to change the world

Everyone comes to an understanding of how to become a good person in different ways: some are sincerely imbued with the story of a sick child abandoned by their parents, others get used to buying sausages for the cat “from the third entrance” every other day. And then it’s simply impossible to live without “NOT”:

respect NOT only yourself;
DO NOT act as you would not like to be treated;
NOT: slander/gloat/be lazy/be afraid of criticism and the list goes on.

Because being is always better than appearing. Because being kind means changing the world for the better every day.

*when copying material, a link to the source is required

Change your attitude towards other people

Most unpleasant emotions are brought to us by other people. We begin to get nervous, worried, upset, offended that we are not understood and not heard. To maintain peace in your soul, stop judging and evaluating people, rather try to understand them and act with them based on their attitude towards life. Avoid people who bring negativity into your life, and with those who are dear to you, in case of any disagreements and solutions to problems, find not just a compromise, but a third option that will suit both parties.

Don't put off achieving your goals, even if they seem impossible. Take it and do what is important to you right now. Don't look for reasons that help justify inactivity; rather, spend your time bringing your plans to life.

Option 2

(449 words) The most important sign of a person’s maturity is her relationships with others. If we have learned to respect them and behave appropriately, then we are already able to find our place in the team and realize our potential. A.N. also spoke about this. Radishchev: “Only then will you become a person when you learn to see a person in another.” Many authors who put this sign of maturity in first place could agree with him.

For example, A.S. Pushkin in his work “The Captain's Daughter” subjected his hero to an important test, as soon as he said goodbye to the family nest. When Peter left his parents, he was still a “minor”, ignorant of life and not at all ready for independence. Therefore, his first steps in the world without the guardianship of his father and mother were erroneous and awkward: he drank too much and lost a large sum of money at billiards. But he was annoyed not by the loss of savings, but by the servant’s behavior. Savelich did not want to repay his debt, because the master would not approve of such wastefulness. Peter became furious and pointed the serf to his place. Savelich gave the money, but Grinev very soon became ashamed of his behavior. He humiliated the one who looked after him since childhood. Then Peter apologized to his servant and received forgiveness. From this moment the hero's evolution begins: he becomes smarter, braver, more responsible. Using his example, the author showed that people begin their path to self-improvement by establishing contact with their environment. The ability to appreciate and respect another is the most important sign of maturity. Until a person learns to see a person in another, he will not become a full-fledged person.

We see a similar example in the work of V.G. Korolenko "In a bad society." Vasya grew up in a wealthy family, but suffered from loneliness and misunderstanding on the part of his father. The judge closed himself off in his grief after the death of his wife and practically did not participate in raising the child. The young hero was left to his own devices. The author considers the most important stage of his “street” growing up to be his acquaintance with poor children. Vasya saw in them friends equal to his abilities. He began to play with them, despite the prejudices of his environment. Valya and Marusya taught Vasya a lot. He saw adult life without embellishment and was forced to think about many serious topics. For example, he realized that Valya was not a bad boy at all, but was condemned to theft by poverty and orphanhood. Having learned a lot about the world and people, Vasya began to perceive his own father differently, whom he had not previously been able to appreciate. Thanks to this circumstance, the hero was able to establish relations with him. This example allows us to be convinced of how important it is to achieve mutual understanding with other people, to learn to respect and understand them. This is a necessary stage in the formation of a full-fledged personality.

Thus, a person must learn to see in other people the same full-fledged and equal individuals as himself. He needs to achieve this understanding, assimilate this wisdom in order to grow up, get comfortable in society and develop further. Without this, he will not be able to improve himself and realize his abilities in society.

How can a Ukrainian invest in ETFs?

Open an account with a foreign broker. For example, the American company Interactive Brokers (IB), which operates in Ukraine. This company has an excellent reputation, a charter capital of $6 billion and operates in 120 markets around the world.
Top up your account. After funding your account, ETF shares can be purchased in a couple of clicks.

Pros: You can actually start with any amount. It's easy and affordable, doesn't require any special knowledge, and investments up to $500,000 are insured. ETF management fee - from 03.% to 1%.

Cons: income tax and military tax (18%+1.5%), withdrawal of dividends (9% and 1.5%), costs for a brokerage account.

Warren Buffett advised the average investor to invest in “an index fund based on the S&P 500 index with minimal fees.” It is also often recommended to use ETFs for medium-term investments of five years or more.

Profitability: ≈ 4–6% per year depending on the fund and the market situation. Maybe higher. Statistics for European funds can be found here, for American funds - here and here. Resources show data only for a predefined period (you cannot select) and taking into account reinvestment.

Minimum investment: Technically, you can start with any amount. An economically feasible figure for starting to earn money on ETFs is from UAH 100,000 (currency equivalent).

How to use the tool: open an account with a foreign broker or intermediary - top up the account - buy.

Option 1

(422 words) Alexander Nikolaevich Radishchev, a famous writer, has a strikingly true phrase: “Only then will you become a person when you learn to see a person in another.” The author demonstrated with it the pattern of formation of a full-fledged personality. Until we learn to respect and value others as ourselves, we cannot claim to be a “human being.” To better explain this statement, we provide suitable examples from the literature.

Thus, M. Gorky in the play “At the Lower Depths” portrayed a heroine who did not respect people and only used them for her own purposes. Vasilisa even hated her husband and sister and restrained her feelings only when profit required it. She did not consider all the inhabitants of the shelter, her clients and guests, to be people. From her mouth came only abuse towards them. Each new acquaintance aroused suspicion and aggression in her. For example, she immediately met Luka with dissatisfaction: “A passerby... too! He’d say he’s a rogue... he’s getting closer to the truth...” But deep down, Vasilisa was even more evil than she seemed outwardly: she planned to force her lover to kill her husband in order to take possession of his property. Therefore, even Vaska Pepel, a thief and a tramp, turned away from her, saying that she had no soul. Many heroes in one way or another noted her distorted, broken essence. Vasilisa did not respect anyone and treated people poorly, so she could not become a full-fledged person.

We see a completely different example in the story of A.I. Kuprin "Wonderful Doctor". The main character did not ignore the grief of others and helped a completely unfamiliar family get back on their feet and overcome difficulties. Doctor Pirogov noticed a desperate poor man in the park and listened to his story. It turned out that Mertsalov was not a tramp or a drunkard, he simply lost his job and was temporarily unable to find a new one. His family struggled with poverty. The children and wife were sick, because in the damp basement there were no conditions for a healthy life. Pirogov went to this closet without hesitation or disgust. He examined Mertsalov’s daughter and his wife, gave them prescriptions and secretly left a large sum of money. From that happy day everything went smoothly: Mertsalov found a job, and all his household got better. Pirogov’s family remembered his kindness and responsiveness for the rest of his life, like many people whom the doctor helped to cope with their illnesses. We can call this hero a man with a capital M, because he treated those around him as human beings, seeing even in the poor a worthy family man.

Thus, a person can become a full-fledged person only when he learns to value and respect others on an equal basis with himself. Until this moment, his social education cannot be considered satisfactory, because for a harmonious life in society we need appropriate skills and knowledge. If people are not able to establish contact with society, then they will not be able to realize their full potential.

Discipline

How can a person be called extraordinary if he has no discipline? Let's fix this.

Develop self-discipline

5 ways to develop self-discipline this week:

Fall asleep and wake up at the same time. For example, develop a routine for yourself from 23:00 to 7:00.
Eat properly. The main thing is not to overeat.
Give up a bad habit. For example, quit smoking for a month.
Workout.
Act according to plan.

You will become familiar with some of the methods in the article.

Get out of your comfort zone

Read also:
How to expand your comfort zone | 3 initial methods

To do this, you need to regularly put yourself in tough conditions.

4 methods on how to do this:

Challenge yourself. For example, run in the morning for 30 days in a row.
Make new friends.
Change the situation.
Change your daily routine.

Watch your health

Points to be observed:

Maintain your physical fitness. Do exercises in the morning, and throughout the rest of the day, do 50 push-ups and 25 pull-ups.
Identify weak points. If you have poor eyesight, start doing eye exercises. If you are overweight, start watching your diet.
Maintain a sleep schedule. Take seven hours of sleep as a basis.

Get up an hour earlier

In this free hour, perform the Miracle Morning ritual. Here's what it consists of:

Awakening. The most proven way to wake up is to wash your face and do exercises.
Meditation. All you need to do is sit in silence for 5 minutes.
Recording plans and setting goals.
15 minutes of reading.

After all this, you can begin the main work.

Never give up

There are times when we are faced with continuous barriers that prevent us from moving forward. During such periods, our dreams and goals seem unattainable. Doubt arises as to whether it is worth fighting for them at all. This is precisely the main mistake of people who have not achieved success.

“There is one impossible thing in the world - to defeat a person who does not give up.”
Conor McGregor

Stages of self-improvement

The main thing, according to the poet, is not to be in “holy ignorance”, not to turn a blind eye to the troubles and problems of the people around you, not to be indifferent, not to live in a “hut on the edge”. Keeping your soul in a “black body”, dragging it “from stage to stage”, like a convict, means not being afraid to inflict mental trauma on yourself. If you see injustice, fight it. Even if you pay for it. They offend your neighbor, the weak, the defenseless - intercede, don’t be afraid. Your own shirt is not always closer to your body. This postulate should be one of the first to be learned if you are really interested in how to become better than others. A restless conscience, anxiety for the world, for people, for nature also belong to the “work of the soul.” Your heart should not harden, become covered with a stone shell that cannot be burned through by the tears of suffering, sorrow and human disasters. But empathy must be effective and active! You can't go far with words alone!

How can a Ukrainian buy them?

To purchase, you will need a foreign bank account, a broker and confirmation of official income for the amount of the deposit. Eurobonds, like government bonds, are sold on the primary and secondary markets. On the secondary market, it is possible to buy in lots smaller than $100,000. For example, from $2,000 to $10,000, but this is unprofitable due to large transaction fees.
The threshold for entry into Ukrainian Eurobonds is high. It’s better to take a closer look at funds that work with bonds in Ukraine: ICU, OTP Capital and others.

Profitability: Income from Eurobonds is on average two times higher than from a foreign currency deposit, and depends on the amount of debt, the size of payments and the urgency of payments. All these parameters are known in advance. The yield fluctuates around 3-10% and depends on who the issuer is - the state or business.

Minimum investment: $100,000 for direct investment in Eurobonds, UAH 100,000 for investment through a bond fund.

How to use the tool: open an account in a foreign bank - enter into an agreement with a broker or investment company - buy.

Option 3

(481 words) “Only then will you become a person when you learn to see a person in another” - this is what A.N. said. Radishchev, famous writer of the 18th century. His quote reveals the most important sign of moral transformation of the individual. If we treat others with respect and see in them the same full-fledged people as ourselves, then this testifies to our spiritual growth and moral priority. Many writers who touched on this topic in their works could agree with this.

For example, L.N. In his epic novel War and Peace, Tolstoy demonstrated the hero’s personal growth through the example of his relationships with others. Before his captivity, Pierre Bezukhov had difficulty establishing social contacts. He did not understand them, they did not understand him, and he often made mistakes, endowing a person with qualities of character that he did not possess at all. Because of these illusions, he fell under the influence of Kuragin and married Helen without love. His inability to understand people prompted him to seek harmony with the world in secret societies, mystical rituals, and wise books. But the truth was nearby and turned out to be much simpler than Bezukhov had thought. In captivity by the French, he met Platon Karataev, experienced hardships and hardships, turned away from his usual rut and expanded his horizons of knowledge. After captivity, Pierre became more attentive and responsive to those around him: “Now a smile of the joy of life constantly played around his mouth, and his eyes shone with concern for people - the question: are they as happy as he is?” The author notes that the most important sign of the hero’s moral transformation is that he was able to see a person in each of the people around him. He learned to appreciate them and become interested in their inner lives, and this skill marked the beginning of his spiritual growth.

We find a similar example in the story of L.N. Andreev "Bargamot and Garaska". The main character was on duty on the eve of Easter and really wanted to return home as soon as possible. But then a local drunkard, known for scandalous behavior, came towards him. Bargamotov wanted to escort Garaska to the department, but the tipsy hero slipped, fell and began to sob. It turned out that Garaska went to the gendarme to congratulate him on Easter and give him a holiday egg, but now he broke it as a result of a fall. Bargamotov was pleasantly surprised by such an unexpected manifestation of kindness. He invited Garaska to his house to break his fast and sat him at the same table with his family. The drunkard was touched by the respect from the authority figure. Sobbing, he said: “When I was born, no one called me by my patronymic....” They all celebrated Easter together. This episode testifies to the moral transformation of the heroes under the influence of the bright holiday of Easter. Bargamotov was able to discern in the drunkard and tramp a person like himself, and showed concern for him as an equal. This speaks of the spiritual growth of the hero, who on this day understood the most important truths - the covenants of Christ, in whose honor people celebrated Easter.

Thus, the ability to discern the person in each of us and show respect for him is an ability that characterizes the moral maturity of a person and his spiritual growth. Without it, people cannot follow the path of moral improvement. The intensive development of the human soul begins with understanding, responsiveness and awareness of the equality of everyone.

Summing up

“By shining for others, I burn myself” - this is the motto, the life credo of truly worthy people. This is their way of thinking, which determines every action, every mental movement. Are those who constantly feed stray animals, treat them at their own expense, and place them in good hands, kind? Without a doubt! Is a young guy a good guy if he spares no time in taking a lonely elderly woman who lives a few blocks away from him for walks? And walk for free! Yes, of course he is good. Positive, best, best, most good - we can address these epithets to those who, behind their own deeds and plans, see the destinies of others and try to actively do good.