Rapport in psychology: what is it and how to use it?

Rapport can be literally translated from French as “return” (French rapport, from the verb rapporter - to return). Therefore, if the question arises about how to write and speak correctly: report or rapport, then the latter option is reasonably correct.

In psychology and psychoanalysis, this concept combines several related meanings: building a certain type of contact with a person or group of people, characterized by a sufficient form of trust and mutual understanding, and the contact itself.

In the literature, this term can be found as a general definition of fairly close relationships between people, determined by emotional community and similar interests. In the NLP concept, the term rapport has a more formalized interpretation: building trusting relationships among two or more people, including the very state of openness. The mechanisms of this phenomenon are discussed in detail below.

Hypnotic rapport

In the modern meaning of the special verbal contact that exists during a hypnosis session between the hypnotist and the hypnotized, the term rapport

has been in circulation since the beginning of the 20th century[2].

Hypnotic rapport

represents selective contact with the hypnotist.
The selectivity and unusualness of such contact lies in the fact that a person immersed in hypnotic sleep, with general deep inhibition of the cerebral cortex and insensitivity to influences from other sources, retains a focus of excitation (“guard point” according to I.P. Pavlov), tuned to the voice of a hypnotist. For example, a hypnotized person can, without reacting to other sounds and without leaving a state of hypnotic sleep, answer the hypnotist’s questions. From a physiological point of view, such a focus of excitation was considered as a zone (point) of rapport
.
According to the classification developed by E. S. Katkov in the 50s based on the teachings of I. P. Pavlov, the rapport zone
appears at the second stage of the hypnotic trance, simultaneously with manifestations of mild catalepsy and inhibition of the second signaling system, and is finally formed with the beginning of the third and last , the stage when the second alarm system is turned off completely, with the exception of the repeat zone itself.[3]

Hypnotic rapport

can be not only isolated, when any speech other than the speech of the hypnotist is ignored, but also generalized, when, after the formation of a
rapport zone
, contact with the hypnotized person can be transferred to someone else and carried out not only by the hypnotist, but also by anyone present [4].

Rapport: what it is and how it works, areas of application – Suppressed

27.11.2019

Rapport technique (RAPPORT)

or a state of trust, harmony and cooperation

First of all, Rapport is NOT a repeating part of the pattern in the canvas and NOT a military report. This is the principle of “agreeing in the opponent’s language,” which is used in neurolinguistic programming (NLP) as the basis for creating unconscious trust (rapport).

Establishing deep rapport with the client is the main (and perhaps the main) condition for the implementation of psychocorrection and any effective communication!

UNCONSCIOUS TRUST is a prerequisite for the individual effectiveness of any NeLPer!!!

The term RAPPORT was introduced by Franz Anton Mesmer (German physician, healer and creator of the doctrine of “animal magnetism”). Mesmer used this term to designate the special psychological and physical contact of a hypnologist (hypnotist) with a client (patient).

This term can also be found in psychoanalysis, where it (rapport) indicates the creation of mutual agreement and a special emotional connection between the client and his analyst.

As can be seen from the above, at all times (including now) the word RAPPORT has meant, first of all, trust.

CONFIDENCE

Good relationships between people (including between seller and buyer) involve the ability to connect with each other.

If trust arises in the process of communication and, as a result, harmony in relationships or business cooperation, then the usefulness and effectiveness of the ability to induce it becomes obvious.

But how can you create an aura of trust around yourself? After all, all people are different and everyone has their own unique inner world...

The secret lies in the structure of the formation of a person’s subjective experience!

CONSCIOUS TRUST - based on personal history. PAST EVENTS determine how much you trust a person.

Consciously, we can trust our family and close people... friends (friendship with whom can be counted for years)...

or to comrades and business partners (if you have already dealt with them 2-3 times before)…

Of course, we can trust a stranger if our friend (whom we trust) guarantees for him. In this case, we trust the guarantor! And not to a stranger.

It may well happen that you trust a stranger if you have reliable information! about it from sources you undoubtedly trust.

In other words - you (in all these cases) trust the forecast for future events based on past events.

We are not talking about a personal attitude towards a person... Agree that you are unlikely to lend money to a person you don’t like, even if you have information that you can trust him.

UNCONSCIOUS TRUST is based not on logic, but on sensations. A SENSE OF COMFORT and SIMILARITY at the level of behavior and internal state.

Close, trusting, open and pleasant relationships cannot be created without emotions! This is the opposite category of logic... This system of information analysis is aimed not at facts, but at sensations.

But the formation of similarity or resemblance with other people, for the vast majority, is a sealed secret.

The generally accepted conclusion of the average person sounds something like this: “People can be pleasant and interesting or unpleasant and boring .

And if you met an interesting person, you are lucky... And if you can’t find a common language with the people who surround you, then you are unlucky... You are surrounded by freaks and stupid people...

And everything is, on the one hand, much simpler (than you think) - you can find a common language with almost any person... and much more difficult (on the other hand), since this requires skills!

In order to instill unconscious trust in people, you need to follow simple and understandable rules.

ADJUSTMENT

RAPPORT can be caused through ADJUSTMENT! That is, through copying and reproducing the behavior of another person.

• Sometimes in the literature there is another term for adjustment - ACCESSION.
• In any case (regardless of the name), the main principle of this technique is to create interpersonal empathy in the communication process.
• In order to somehow organize all possible human behavior, they are usually divided into two categories: verbal and non-verbal. And the scheme for creating trusting relationships with people usually looks like this:

You may have already come across a similar scheme, where all the information that you can get is distributed in a similar way.

If we translate scientific terms into simple human language, then WORDS (7%) provide the content of the conversation, and BODY LANGUAGE (53%) and HOW WE SPEAK (38%) determine its context. All together creates the meaning of communication!

The diagram clearly demonstrates that we receive 93% of information non-verbally! That is, unconsciously. Or, as is commonly believed in neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), on an unconscious level.

Nonverbal adjustment

Since nonverbals account for 93% of all information we receive, then we’ll start with that.

The first thing to understand is that people habitually (get ready to) think about WHAT TO SAY instead of HOW TO SAY! And what many don't consider is that very often we make decisions or draw conclusions from a conversation while interacting (mostly) without using words!

Our body and voice characteristics will give our interlocutor an understanding of HOW TO UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU SAID.

That is why people, as a rule, do not consciously pay attention to how we behave with them (naturally, if our behavior does not go beyond the bounds of decency), but critically evaluate the words that we utter.

This is where the magic begins...

Non-verbal adjustment BY BODY

This technique is the easiest to perform. By copying a person’s pose, you become (sort of) like him...

It's like a mirror. You see a reflection of yourself and, accordingly, treat the person as your reflection.

1. Of course, it's not that simple!
2. We do not reproduce in an exaggerated manner literally everything that a person demonstrates, but we reproduce the structure of what he demonstrates (as if in a smaller amplitude).
3. You can start joining by pose by tilting the body, then turning the head, and so on until a perfect copy.

Despite the fact that all people are different, as a rule, each person has a rather limited set of preferred (comfortable - inconvenient) positions of the head, arms and legs... specific gestures and facial reactions...

By mirroring a person’s posture in your own position, you will notice that your breathing becomes similar. This is easy to explain purely physiologically. After all, one of the Basic presuppositions of NLP says: Consciousness and body are a single cybernetic system.

This NLP axiom states - Everything is interconnected! And “mutually - controlled”...

Next, you should repeat the characteristic gestures of your interlocutor. It is better to repeat gestures when it is your turn to speak. Otherwise, you risk that he will notice patterns that are too obvious, and this, in turn, may be perceived negatively.

Nonverbal adjustment according to RHYTHM

We have already talked briefly about adjusting your breathing.

In fact, this is a very high level of adjustment! When connecting by breathing, you need to take into account the frequency, depth and intensity of the interlocutor’s breathing.

If the interlocutor talks a lot, then you should remember that a person is able to pronounce articulate SOUNDS ONLY WHEN EXHALATED! Therefore, when a person says a phrase or sentence, he exhales... and we exhale.

It's probably no secret to you that men and women breathe differently. That is, we want to say that they have different types of breathing. Most often (but not always) men have abdominal breathing (they breathe from the stomach), and women have thoracic breathing.

It is especially important to be able to adjust your breathing using hypnotic influence on a person. It is believed that by speaking his phrases while the interlocutor exhales, the hypnotist thereby transfers the person’s consciousness into an altered... or trance state.

When experiencing empathy (or a state very close to it), people usually feel the internal rhythms of their interlocutor.

By reproducing the rhythms of your communication partner in your behavior, you give a very powerful signal to the unconscious perception of your interlocutor that you are exactly the same as him.

Who do we trust the most?!

Nonverbal adjustment by VOICE

For example, if you are talking with a person and notice that he speaks slowly and his voice is low and masculine (with great depth and fullness of sound), then you should not chatter to him (very quickly the entire flow of your thoughts). He won't hear you anyway! Or rather, he will hear many quickly pronounced sounds... but the thought itself, alas, will not.

Source:

Rapport - a technique of influencing and instilling confidence

Rapport in psychology is a special state of specific contact between people, the achievement of which is characterized by a high degree of trust and mutual understanding. It can be defined by the establishment of close relationships based on emotional and intellectual community. People united by rapport are on the same wavelength and moving in the same direction.

Sometimes in communities such a connection is formed naturally during long-term communication of one circle of people. But there are also special ways to establish rapport that help you influence people and things. They help make the other person want to trust and follow you.

Rapport can be used in different ways: for the common good or to achieve personal goals. Moreover, in the latter case, if they do not harm another person, there is nothing wrong with using rapport. It only helps speed up communication to a more productive level.

Where is rapport used?

Establishing trusting relationships is widely used in psychoanalysis to increase the effectiveness of interaction with the client. It helps remove many of the barriers that prevent him from relaxing during the appointment. In Gestalt therapy, rapport helps a specialist to study a person’s problem deeper and better convey options for solving it.

Separately, it is worth noting the role of rapport in the use of hypnosis. Establishing such contact involves immersing a person in a special sleep, during which a general inhibition of the cerebral cortex is observed.

The person stops responding to any stimuli other than the hypnotist’s voice. There is only one source of excitation left for its perception.

From a physiological point of view, it is considered as a zone or point of rapport.

The halo effect - what is it, examples, experiments

Rapport also occupies a special place in neurolinguistic programming. Here it can serve different purposes:

• to earn favor;
• extend communication;
• encourage necessary actions.

The use of rapport in NLP is based on adjusting to the characteristics of the type of perception of the interlocutor (visual, auditory or kinesthetic).

They require careful analysis of behavior and emotional state, as well as tracking of predicates. The latter are words and expressions that reflect the way we perceive the world around us.

For example, visual learners seem to paint a picture with words. Therefore, their speech is dominated by descriptions of shades, shapes and positions of objects in space.

Tools for setting up rapport

The successful use of rapport in life by people far from science involves the use of NLP knowledge. The main thing here, as mentioned above, is the adjustment method to establish rapport. Having studied the peculiarities of the interlocutor’s perception of information, convey the information in a way that is convenient for him.

For example, in a visual conversation, pay attention to images. This will help you establish contact as quickly as possible. And to make him want to trust and follow you, use three simple but effective tools.

Tools for achieving rapportImplementation features

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Additional recommendations from experts

To build rapport with different people faster and more effectively, it is also important to develop additional skills. They will help you expand your horizons and act flexibly in any circumstances, turning them to your advantage.

Source: https://glpni.ru/prochee/rapport-chto-eto-i-kak-im-rabotat-oblasti-primeneniya.html

Rapport in psychoanalysis

In psychoanalysis, the establishment of rapport, understood as mutual agreement, an emotional connection between the client and the psychoanalyst, is considered a necessary condition for effective psychoanalysis [5] [6]. At the same time, the connection between the concepts of rapport and transfer is considered by different psychoanalysts in different ways; rapport acts either as a prototype of transfer, or as its variety, the optimal level [2].

Thus, Jung believed that:

...we need a closed rapport, so closed that the doctor cannot take his eyes off the heights and lows of human suffering. This rapport consists primarily in constant comparison and mutual comprehension, in the dialectical confrontation of two opposing mental realities. If for some reason these mutual impressions do not harmonize, the therapeutic process will be ineffective.

Rapport and adjustment: how to become someone they trust

Very often it is easier for us to destroy each other than to smooth out the differences between us. This is the cosmic irony of human nature (c) Brian Herbert, Hunters of Dune

Rapport

(from English
rapport
) is a state of resonance, which in psychology and NLP is called mutual understanding, emotional and intellectual unity. Simply put, people in a state of rapport swim on the same wavelength.

The “Creating Rapport” technique is the conscious and controlled creation of mutual resonance for specific purposes.

The consequence of this surfing together will be trust. Its presence always correlates with how similar a person is to us: the more you reflect me, the more I trust you. After all, who do we trust most wholeheartedly? Of course, to ourselves.

Rapport is achieved in only one way - by adjusting to another person or group of people.

Tuning in NLP

is a tool through which we achieve rapport with the right people. By adjusting, we seem to coordinate the rhythms, tempos, parameters of another or others, entering into resonance with him/her and tuning into the same wavelength. We are becoming alike.

We all make adjustments from time to time, and some even live by it (extreme conformism). We get to know a person, we want to get along with him, and now we sit like him, wave our hands like him, talk with the same volume and speed. Without intent, on autopilot.

In other words, in NLP, to adapt means to become like another person in order to induce a state of rapport and gain trust.

Tuning techniques

The success of the adjustment is based on one thing - the high-quality calibration of the person.

Task No. 1 is to count a person, his manners, state, gestures, emotions, as well as predicates in his speech. Predicates are words that characterize his way of perceiving the world (visual, auditory, kinesthetic, etc.).

For example:

I see colorful perspectives with clear benefits
(visual)
;

He loudly declared himself in business, immediately placing all the accents
(auditory) ;
The situation needs to be felt and controlled with a firm hand
(kinesthetic) .
Having heard the dominant type of perception by predicates, you will be able to speak the language of your interlocutor and spoon what you want into his head so that you can be understood.

When adjusting, do not go too far - this can cause the opposite effect in the form of mistrust and rejection.

No one is in a hurry to establish rapport with a copy machine, so adjust gently, do not rub the similarity with him in the person’s face.

Share his emotional state (at least outwardly) - with a hyperthymic person, be more cheerful, with a schizoid, keep your distance and be quieter. Then introduce its predicates into your vocabulary, adapt to its pace, etc.

The effect doubles if you adapt to the person not only physically, but also mentally: by brands, by diseases, by eating habits, by hobbies. It’s enough to say “Oh, me too!”, “Oh, me too!” and so on. “Too” and “We” are magical words; they plunge us into a state of rapport almost without fail. Because you don’t know what to say - “get together.”

If you are already thinking “why bother with this”, then stop:

Firstly, if a person is not a social phobe, then he is already bothered with rapport and adjustment to varying degrees, he simply does not notice it;

Secondly, as social creatures, we depend on other people, and by liking them we increase our chances of success in this world.

Conclusion: you need to consciously do rapport only when you want it / it’s beneficial.

Management: how to manage the condition of others

We are afraid of being different. But if we become the same, the fear will go away (c) Tokyo Ghoul: Rebirth

Having created a conscious rapport with a person through adjustment, that is, one “I” for two, you become able to direct the person where you need him to go.

You can gradually change a person’s state and behavior and lead him or her. Why would that be so? This is because the other person, having entered a comfortable state of rapport with you, will want to maintain it.

In this regard, if you begin to change your behavior, the person will most likely follow you.

Cynical, but typical: the main purpose of rapport is to lead a person along.

Look at the example of Sergei Shnurov.

It is clear to any sane person who follows Shnurov’s work to some extent that he is a fairly intelligent and educated person, and with his ridicule he appeals to high moral values.

In his interviews and social networks, he often mentioned his interest in philosophy and classical literature. The question arises, why then does he behave like an inveterate alcoholic?

It's simple: this is how he adapts to that large audience whose views and principles he actually wants to change. He was able to create rapport and lead. After all, as we remember, to change the system, you need to be in it

.

Rapport relaxes, reduces vigilance: you no longer need to defend yourself, because “your” person is next to you. It is those people with whom we develop this trust that are able to strongly influence us, our thoughts and actions.

Of course, many manipulators and deceivers take advantage of this. I can’t count how often people lent huge sums of money and transferred their apartments to people they barely knew. But what can you do, a knife can also be used in different ways.

Rapport in neurolinguistic programming

In NLP, rapport is understood more broadly as the establishment of a relationship of trust between two (or more) people, as well as this trust itself[7].

Establishing rapport between the client and the communicator is the most important task of NLP as a psychotherapeutic practice. Achieving rapport can be a long process, but rapid rapport is also possible; The duration of the procedure may depend on the skill of the communicator. Rapport can be achieved on both a conscious and unconscious level. The main method of establishing rapport in NLP is joining (adjusting) to the client’s main representative systems, reflecting them in communication and non-verbal behavior. When nonverbally adjusting to the client's representative systems, adjustment is made to the pace of breathing, posture, gestures, eye movements, etc. Verbal attachment is based on repeating the characteristic features of the client's verbal behavior. [8]

Establishing rapport can be seen as important not only for psychotherapeutic practice, but also for other types of interpersonal communication. Thus, establishing rapport between doctor and patient can not only increase satisfaction with treatment and reduce the risk of medical malpractice, but, according to some studies, can speed up recovery and reduce the need for painkillers[9].

Rapport and leading

At high levels of trust (subconscious), a state called “ rapport ” can occur.

“Rapport” is translated from English as “connection”, “consent”

The presence of rapport indicates that a system has formed and people are beginning to act as a single whole.

Those same couples who dance tango or waltz must have very good rapport in order to do it well. That is, they must form a system.

And in order for people to form a system, there must be rapport between them. In short, if people have formed a system, there is rapport between them. And vice versa.

Rapport does not mean that you now share the same movements and thoughts - it only means that they are coordinated. In the same tango, each partner has his own movements, but at the same time a similar state, rhythm, style and speed of movements

One of the properties of rapport is the desire to follow a person, to feel goodwill and trust in him. That is, if rapport appears, then guidance appears: you change your state and the person follows you.

You changed your position - and so did he, you reduced the speed of speech - and he slowed down, you calmed down - and he relaxed. At high levels of rapport, even synchronized movements are possible - you raise your hand and he raises it, you move the index finger of your right hand - and so does he.

Therefore, movement guidance is good to use to check the presence of rapport.

The presence of guidance is a sign of rapport. That is, if there is rapport, then you can lead, if you cannot lead, there is no rapport

It happened with you in the company: one begins to yawn, and the rest follow him. And try to sit next to a sleepy acquaintance - it also makes you sleepy.

By the way, with good rapport, it is usually even impossible to understand who exactly is leading - a common movement is simply born, common directions for ideas appear and they communicate on the same topic

Leading is one of the main tools of influence - you enter into rapport and move together in the right direction.

Story. A couple of guys familiar with NLP went to a rock concert. When they took their seats, they discovered that a girl was sitting next to them in a very dejected state. It is unpleasant. You are at a rock concert, and next to you is a dejected girl. What did they do.

No, they didn’t ask her: “What happened?” They also sat in similar positions, with similar breathing and facial expressions. And then they slowly began to straighten up, raise their heads and smile. Ten minutes later the girl was already smiling and screaming along with everyone else.

Let's summarize:

Calibration is needed to accurately interpret a message; tuning helps build perception filters and achieve a state of rapport. If you are in rapport, you are now one system and can lead (him, her, them, us) in the right direction

Everything is very simple. Well, then in more detail, how to create and use this rapport and guidance.

Exercise “Calibrating Rapport”

Although the only sensory-obvious sign of rapport is leading, there is one tricky thing about this rapport: it is symmetrical. That is, if you are in rapport with a person, then he is also in rapport with you. So you can calibrate yourself.

This distinguishes rapport from trust - both conscious and subconscious. Trust can be in a person with whom there is no contact (rapport only happens when there is contact) - for example, I trust Dostoevsky, although he died long ago. Well, this is actually how it should be - rapport is a sign of interaction. And for interaction (in both directions) you need an information channel

So, the task. There are a lot of situations when you have good rapport: you do something together (for example, dance a couple dance), you talk with a pleasant person and you feel good together.

Determine how you feel this connection within yourself. Compare with a person who may be nearby, but is indifferent. Try it with several people - at least seven people and in different situations - and find the common ground.

It should be something quite sensory.

• a feeling of warmth and relaxation in the solar plexus area;
• feeling of fullness in the chest;
• a feeling of light vibration that goes from the bottom of the abdomen to the top.

Yes, it will most likely be a feeling. Moreover, these sensations that indicate rapport vary from person to person.

Where we go

Training:: Mastery of Communication

On this topic

Glossary:: Rapport

Article:: Communication 4: Trust

NLP Practitioner:: Rapport

Source: https://nlp.trenings.ru/blog/29-rapport-i-vedenie

Notes

1. Brief psychological dictionary
2. ↑ 12
   Psychoanalytic terms and concepts. (unavailable link)
3. All about hypnosis. V. V. Kondrashov. Ch. 4 — “Research on hypnosis in Russia”
4. Hypnosis and suggestion in the clinic of internal diseases. P. I. Bul, 1958
5. Rapport (inaccessible link) (inaccessible link since 06/14/2016 [1275 days]) - Encyclopedia of Sociology
6. Rapport - Rycroft C. “A Critical Dictionary of Psychoanalysis.”
7. “Stay your line. Techniques for effective communication." N. Nepryakhin (2007)
8. NLP as a psychotherapeutic method. — Encyclopedia "Around the World"
9. Chaper 8. Communicating to establish rapport — Patient practitioner interaction. Carol M. Davis, Helen L. Masin (English)

Links

• Rapport (inaccessible link) (inaccessible link since 06/14/2016 [1275 days]) - article in the Encyclopedia of Sociology.
• Self-instruction manual of hypnosis. Melanin D.V.
• Rapport @ https://www.nlpforum.ru/
• Rapport