What should you write to your ex-boyfriend to make him want to come back? Proven method!

When it comes to correspondence with your ex, text messages can work in your favor, but only if you use this method of communication wisely.

It is especially important to pay attention to what to write to your ex-boyfriend in order to interest him and make him return. Of course, you can’t say a magic phrase after which he will crawl back. The perfect text sent at the right time is what will pave the way to success.

Texting your ex does pose a risk that he will reject you or simply not respond. For this reason, be mentally prepared for any development of events, especially if the guy left you. If you feel that you will not be able to endure negative scenarios after you write to your guy, then first devote more time to working on yourself before taking such a difficult step.

What you can and cannot write

First of all, let's talk about what you can and cannot write to your ex-boyfriend:

You cannot write while intoxicated. This is always a very bad idea. On a sober head, you will regret this action.
Don't do it just because you're lonely. You need to make sure that your ex is the right person, and the relationship will be different this time.
Get rid of excessive emotionality. Men are not prone to emotionally difficult conversations. This means don't send him messages like, “I can't stop crying. I don't know how to live without you.” This will only push the ex away and reduce the chances of returning.
Don't start a fight to get attention. Even if you get an answer, the conversation will definitely go in the wrong direction in the end.
Obsessiveness. If he doesn't respond, then just leave the man alone. There is no need to write millions of times: “Are you there? Hello???? Why don't you answer me?? Something happened? Just answer so I know you’re alive!” If a person doesn’t answer, it means he doesn’t want to do it. Is it worth causing additional irritation and humiliating yourself, especially when he abandoned you. You can read more about the signs that your ex wants to come back in our separate article.

How to write to apologize to your boyfriend and get him back

So, you went through a breakup and you're feeling really bad right now. Any attempts to talk do not lead to anything good. Your ex-boyfriend does not answer phone calls, does not respond to SMS, avoids meetings, although you persistently attack him from all sides. But even if you found the courage and managed to meet with him, the conversation does not work out, and after that you feel like a “complete fool” because you could not say what you wanted.

Now I will express a man’s point of view on how you can apologize and try to get your ex-boyfriend back.

In fact, everything you do is wrong and your desperate attempts to get your guy back will lead to the exact opposite result!

Even if at the time of the breakup he still entertained the idea of a possible return, then after your clumsy actions, the desire to return will disappear forever.

One of the stages of worrying about a breakup, after fruitless attempts to get your ex-boyfriend back, is the thought of writing a letter. In general, writing a letter is a very good idea. The only trouble is that almost EVERYTHING! girls do not know how to write such letters and therefore cannot succeed.

From this point on, read very carefully: An incorrectly written letter will lead you to complete disaster and will leave no chance for your ex-boyfriend to return.

Only a serious and thoughtful approach will allow you to count on the success of restoring relationships.

Rules for writing a letter to get your ex-boyfriend back

Time is on your side. If just yesterday you were bombarding your ex-boyfriend with text messages, you don’t need to start writing a letter today. Take a break! This will allow your words to be perceived as a deliberate step, and not a new way to attract attention.

Brevity is the soul of wit. Don't write long. This is the main mistake girls make. Letters of this kind usually take the form of “showdowns,” executed in the form of a monologue, where all the negative aspects of your relationship are once again discussed, listing grievances (both real and perceived).

If you are planning to write a letter in this spirit, please do not do it, because it will cause a negative reaction from the reader and lead to results diametrically opposite to those expected.

As few details as possible. This rule echoes the previous one. When you write a letter to your ex, you tend to describe in too much detail all the nuances of your relationship. This in itself will be evidence of your unstable state of mind at the time of writing the letter and will not allow your words to be perceived as well thought out. But this is not the most dangerous thing.

Now you want to get him back, no matter what. A breakup in a relationship has, to a certain extent, robbed you of your ability to think rationally. But if you're a smart girl, think a little about the future. Documenting your most vulnerable moments in too much detail can later be used against you.

Imagine, you cannot predict how events will develop further. Will you get back together or not? Will he return now or not? Or maybe he’ll come back, but then you’ll break up again? And under what circumstances will all this happen?

Remember, there is always a chance that your ex could blackmail you using your own letter. And the more details there are in this letter, the more severe the blackmail will be. For example, he may send a copy of this letter to your new lover just to get back at you. I don't think you would want that.

Sincerely ask for forgiveness. Don't place some of the blame on another person or circumstances. This will finally end the relationship. A phrase like: “It’s my fault, but...” will kill all hopes for a successful outcome.

If you want to write a letter to apologize and get your boyfriend back , it should be a short letter that doesn't include any talk about your past relationship.

The letter should be encouraging and “look” exclusively to the future. Put yourself in the place of your ex-lover, maybe he is also not very happy about the breakup and is ready to forgive you and return, so if you make a mistake, you will force him to cross the line after which there will be no return to the past.

Your letter should be: open, short, sincere. After you write it, re-read it and do not send it right away. In an impulse, you can say a lot of unnecessary things.

Example letter

And now, of course, you want to see an example of such a letter. I will try to help you, but remember that you must write yourself, in your own words, and not copy this example.

My dear ______! I am very sorry that everything happened this way, and I fully admit my guilt in what happened. Believe me, I had enough time to realize this. After we parted, I clearly understood how much I missed you and how wrong I was. This feeling does not give me peace for a minute and the most painful thing is to understand that everything is to blame for me and my behavior because of which I lost you.

I really hope that you can forgive me.

I promise to do everything to make you feel like the happiest person in the world with me. I ask you to believe me and give me a chance to fix everything.

I love you very much

Your ____________

AUTHOR'S NOTE: My answers in the comments are the opinion of a private individual and not the recommendation of a specialist. I’m trying to answer everyone without exception, but unfortunately I don’t physically have time to study long stories, analyze them, ask questions about them and then answer in detail, and I also don’t have the opportunity to accompany your situations, because this requires a huge amount of free time, and I have very little of it.

In this regard, I kindly ask you to ask specific questions on the topic of the article, and do not expect that I will advise in the comments or accompany your situation.

Of course, you can ignore my request (which many people do), but in this case, be prepared for the fact that I may not answer you. This is not a matter of principle, but solely of time and my physical capabilities. Don't be offended.

If you want to receive qualified help, please seek advice, and I will devote my time and knowledge to you with full dedication.

With respect and hope for understanding, Frederica

“No contact” rule

In order to understand when you can write to your ex after a breakup, follow an important rule - wait a period without any contact. As a rule, this is at least four weeks.

You cannot text, call or communicate during this period.

It doesn't matter if it's the guy's birthday, whether he's made any positive changes in his life, etc. No contact means no contact.

Why is this point so important? The period of no contact gives him the opportunity to get bored, which he cannot do if you are always looming in front of his nose or blowing up his phone or social networks with messages. Four weeks of no communication can also help you get rid of the intensity of emotions after a breakup and gain a clearer understanding of what happened.

After this period of no contact, if your ex hasn't texted himself, then you can make contact through whatever means you want. Text messages are usually the easiest and safest method.

The exception to the “no contact” rule is tragic events. You can write to your ex for support, but be very careful and not verbose.

The text options below are good ways to reconnect or get people thinking about you in a more romantic way, but only after a four-week period of no communication. This is a must!

Happy birthday wishes to ex-boyfriend

Although we parted with you, We remained friends. I treasure you. I ask only a little: Be healthy and happy, Good-natured and beautiful. Make your little girl happy, Don't forget me, your friend. Be loved and love, If anything happens, call me. I will always help you, if necessary I will remain silent. Happy birthday! I wish you happiness and peace, May your dreams come true, If something goes wrong, forgive me...

Nothing in the world is accidental And there were meetings for a reason. Let us not become a friendly couple, Let the relationship not become eternal! I congratulate you today, I wish you such love, So that it becomes the best secret, So that you don’t look for another one later! Be happy, be healthy, successful, and may your dreams come true. You are a human being, you are not sinless, Learn to forgive, know how to say goodbye!

Happy birthday! Good luck to you and thank you for everything: for the fact that you were once the most important part of my life. I sincerely wish you all the best, the right path and the right life priorities. Achieve your goals and never give up. Believe in yourself and remember: everything that happens is for the better!

More congratulations in prose →

Let everything remain in the past - Quarrels, rude words, Think only about the good, So that life can be happier. Be successful, cheerful, brave, Make friends easily, On the way, so that all your problems will break like glass! May luck love you, Only joy awaits you in life, And luck will be nearby, Not a step away!

Even though this world is big, every meeting in it is an exam. But “former” does not mean “stranger”, And you occupied a cell in the heart. I wish you from the bottom of my heart Love, understanding, joy. Let there be no obstacles in your aspirations for big goals. Good luck, exciting ray May your heart be hopeful, And the key to happiness will open, And God will help you with this.

We broke up, it happens... But my heart knows that I should congratulate, Friendship is also important. So, ex, happy birthday! Forget in one moment All grievances are now you, Let your dreams lead you forward. I wish you happiness, you deserve it, I know it. Be healthy, find love, Smile again and again!

I’ll wish you a happy birthday... For old times’ sake, hurry up. After all, you used to be much closer to all your girlfriends and all your friends. Let fortune not play pranks, Let the world give bright days. Mutual love and hope Let the lights shine brighter. I remember you with a smile - The one from our past days. And I wish you and your companion to be happy.

Even if we are not together today, You left a mark on my soul, On this excellent holiday I wish you many years to come! Endless luck And a large supply of love, Only happiness in the mood, And so that your enthusiasm does not fade!

Happy birthday to you, my love, Unfortunately, it’s no longer mine. I wish you to be strong and cool, like a movie hero. May you be healthy, beautiful and never live without love for a day. Be sure to be happy! Even if without me.

Imagine, I remember. Congratulations! Happy birthday, you were, after all, in my destiny. And even though I haven’t dreamed about you for a long time, I keep only the best things about you in my memory. I wish you to be happy. Not with me, but with “nothing worse.” And even if she is even more beautiful, the main thing is that she is warmer in the cold. Ruddy pies, thicker cabbage soup, and a hot bed with my dear. Let there be less sadness in your memories, I wish you to be happy...

May everything work out great for you, happy years ahead, prosperity and love on the personal front, and luck always at hand! Even though the roads separated you and me, But the memory only preserves the good. I wish you a lot of joy, And let success stick like a magnet!

Happiness and ease

Men love happy women. When you feel good, they enjoy being around you and talking to you. When a girl is always negative and emotionally unbalanced, then men prefer to stay on the sidelines.

There is nothing more attractive than a positive and happy woman.

Be sure to keep this in mind if you want to text your ex.

Just one little happy and light-hearted text can do wonders. It will also show the guy that it is safe to approach you. Perhaps the ex wanted to write the first one himself, but was not sure that you were in any good mood. With a happy, carefree text, you show that you have gone through all the terrible emotions and are ready for a new life.

Starting a conversation with your ex-boyfriend with vague or banal formulations, such as: “How are you? What are you doing?" - it’s not worth it. This may make your ex a little wary of the conversation. He doesn’t know whether you are friendly or going to start a scandal. The best way to re-ignite the spark is to recall a shared positive experience. This will direct the conversation in the right direction and have a more positive tone.

The message should show that you are thinking about the past, but not necessarily about your ex specifically. That you don’t cry into your pillow every night, thinking about him, but continue to live, and only sometimes some things remind you of the past. Or, for example, you think about some happy memory and feel comfortable discussing it with your ex.

For example, you could write something like: “Hi. I just wanted to know if you ever tried bungee jumping, which we looked at recently. I tried it and really liked it! I recommend."

Farewell letter from a lover

We don't always plan in advance what happens to us, and an affair with a married man is one of these cases. Many women are mired in the quagmire of such relationships, but almost every one of them sooner or later realizes that this can no longer continue. It would seem that you have a loved one, but at the same time you remain lonely. It doesn’t matter for what reason you went into this affair, but if you decide to break off a love affair with someone else’s husband, then you can do this by sending a few lines.

How to get out of such a relationship using a letter

Do not write to your lover that you have feelings for him and you would like to be together, but you are leaving because you have a wife. In such a message, it is generally advisable not to describe the emotions you experienced. It will be best if you communicate that you have had enough time to evaluate the pros and cons of such meetings and you have realized that this relationship has been exhausted. Note that you are not expecting any decisive steps from him, and are not trying to manipulate him, you have only one goal - to forget about this affair and give yourself a chance to find personal happiness with another person. If you wish, you can hint that you recently met a man who is showing you signs of attention that you would like to respond to, but you do not want to play a “double game.” Summarize that, be that as it may, you do not intend to maintain contact with him anymore, and ask him not to seek contact with you. Indicate that you are grateful to him for many pleasant moments, but the status of a mistress has long ceased to suit you.

Perhaps after this he will try to get you to talk, but if you have the willpower not to react to attempts to return everything to its previous course, then pretty soon you will be able to start a new life.

Intriguing

The best thing you can do after a breakup is to work on yourself, making yourself a better person. If everything remains exactly the same, then the former partner will not be ready to restore the relationship.

You need to change the way the guy sees you. An intriguing message will help with this.

This type of text shows that you are a better version of the person you once were. That is, you get outside more, exercise, travel, live your best life. This type of woman really captures a man's attention.

Mention something interesting you did or saw recently that reminded you of a funny thing you did with your ex.

These texts will arouse his interest:

Is she a runner now?
When did she become so passionate about fitness? She looks simply amazing...
Did she go on vacation? And with whom? Maybe she was with a guy?

An intriguing message will make a man think about you in a new way, which means it will shake his confidence in his decisions.

Farewell letter to a married man

Not a single woman is immune from the fact that a married man will pay attention to her. It even happens that he manages to achieve reciprocity. Perhaps you immediately knew that he was married, but it may also be that this circumstance was revealed to you only now. Be that as it may, you decided for yourself that you do not need such a relationship. In this case, your reluctance to meet in person to break up is understandable.

You need to do everything to turn this page of your life. You should not hope that with this letter you will provoke his divorce - if he has not left his family yet, then the letter will not change this. And there is nothing good in “stealing” a man away from another. Write to him that he could not make the final choice, so you will have to take this step, and you are choosing a full-fledged relationship. This won't work with him, and you no longer want to bring avoidable experiences into your life. Wish him to understand himself and his desires, and ask him not to bother you anymore - there can be no love and friendship between you.

This situation is very sensitive, so it is worth thinking carefully about the appropriateness of the letter. The message may end up in the wrong hands, bringing unnecessary problems not only to the man, but also to you, so make sure that it reaches the right recipient.

Emphasis on nostalgia

People will always idealize what they no longer have. This is a natural process that will work in your favor after a breakup. If you don’t know what to write to your ex-boyfriend, then remind him of happy times. This powerful tool activates feelings of longing for you.

For example, write the following: “I remember one cool night at the top of our cliff... you kept me warm, holding me in your arms. It was a pleasure."

What to write to your ex-boyfriend to make him want to come back

Hello again!

Are you sure you really want this? Then read my examples of SMS that you can write to your ex-boyfriend so that he wants to come back to you.

Be sure to take a break in communication for about 2-3 weeks.

What can you write to your ex-boyfriend after a breakup?

If you are at fault:

My happiness only has your face.
With our parting, all the stars in the sky went out for me. Without you I wander in the dark.
I have only one desire left - to go back to the past and correct what happened. Alas, it will never come true.
By losing you, I lost a part of myself.
There are no ideal people. If you could forgive me, I would prove how strong my feelings are for you.
Do you remember how we... (walked in the park, loved to lie on the sofa together, roller skated). I really miss this.
Separation from you is the worst punishment for my actions. I still hope that you will come back.
I realized that I don't want to do 3 things. 1) to be separated from you; 2) fall asleep without you; 3) drink coffee in the morning alone.

I thought that after parting, the love in my heart for you would fade away. But it's the other way around. The flames grew so hot that it became difficult to breathe without you.

I wish I could take back all the pain I caused you. After all, you are the most dear person in the world to me.

Here's what else you can write to a guy to make him understand that you need him.

If your ex-boyfriend is to blame, here’s what you can write to him after the breakup:

Let's start all over again? Without quarrels, tears, insults, omissions and reproaches.
Recently I was going through my things and saw a photo of us together. We are so happy with it. Maybe we should try to find happiness together again?
I saw your favorite candies in the store. I immediately thought of you and bought them. Would you like to pop in for a cup of tea and discuss a truce?
I no longer have the strength to be offended or angry with you. There is only strength for love or friendship. What do you think about that?
It turns out that watching a movie alone on the couch is not as interesting as watching it with you. We urgently need to make peace!
Do you remember how it was when you were a child? Make up, make up, and don’t fight anymore... let’s make up for the last time, and if you mess up, I’ll bite you?
I love myself the way I was next to you: happy and loved. If there is even a slight chance of repeating everything, let me know.
I've prepared a truce dinner! I also bought a bottle of truce wine and truce fruit! I propose to bury the hatchet and move on to negotiations at the table. Agree?

If you feel as bad without me as I do without you, call me.

They say that from love to hate there is one step... But I have only love for you, no matter what.

Alternatively, try beautiful poems to touch his heart...

What to write to your ex-boyfriend so that it hurts him and he comes back

Only you yourself can touch your man's heart with a word. You know what a guy will react to immediately? If not, then check out my list:

You owe me... Bring back my wounded heart.
You forgot to give me...my soul.
What a fool (?) you are...if you think I'm still angry with you.
I know that you are still not dating anyone. However, one beauty still has warm feelings for you. Guess what her name is?
Quite by accident I threw all your gifts into the trash can. Unfortunately, I cannot return them to you. Maybe I should give something in return?

Somehow I’m not at all sad after the breakup. They probably ran away incorrectly. We need to get back together again, and break up again properly.

Our breakup helped me rethink a lot in life. Now I'm finally moving on without looking back at the past. Only positive! Call me if you want.

I see no reason to meet with you except one. (What???) Return our photos (gifts, rings) to each other.

I'm better without you. Calm down. Happier. You probably would have liked the current me more.
Now I understand why we broke up. I'm simply irresistible, and you can't stand competition.
You can't forget to return. Place a comma where you see fit.
I urgently need someone to talk to. Can I trust you like an old friend? (Either he will be furious: old? Familiar? Or intrigued).
If I ever offended you in any way, I apologize. I don’t want you to have any negativity towards me. (further logically he should write about his feelings).
Now the reason for our quarrel seems ridiculous to me. And you? (Yes/no - and you can start a dialogue).

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Source: https://art-kiss.ru/chto-napisat-byvshemu-parnyu-chtoby-on-zahotel-vernutsya.html

We're friends now

This is an extremely dangerous type of message, so use it with caution. After all, you may end up in the friend zone forever.

For example, send: “Hey... just wanted to say that I'm glad it's over, but I'd be really sorry to lose our friendship.”

This is a good option because the balance of power shifts from the guy to you. Instead of your ex thinking you still want to get back, you say you just want to be friends. This way you can end up having fun with him again... and then re-seduce him!

Calling out jealousy

Jealousy plays a huge role and often attracts an old love back. Sometimes this is the only way to make a man understand how much he misses his ex-girlfriend.

Many people say that trying to make your ex jealous is an effective strategy. Honestly, this is a very tricky and at the same time very dangerous option that can lead to disaster.

Jealousy should not be used if the ex-boyfriend is insecure, extremely emotional, or jealous.

The message could be: “Hi! Everything was wonderful last night. You looked amazing!”

Keep in mind that you can only send this message after you have already written to your ex in a pleasant manner and feel good mutual understanding between you.

Request for advice

As you know, men are creatures who want to help the weaker sex both physically and mentally. For this reason, ask him for advice on some topic that your ex-boyfriend understands. Feeling useful has been shown to relieve feelings of stress in men, and communicating with an ex-girlfriend can be a challenging time.

For example: “Hello! I decided to take up music, but I don’t know which guitar is better to choose. Can you give me some advice?

The ex-boyfriend will feel great at the time of reading, as this is a confirmation of his expertise in this matter. But this option won’t work if you just come up with something that you don’t need at all. If a man catches you in a lie, then the chance will be lost.

Farewell letter to the guy you love

It is very difficult to say goodbye forever to a person for whom love has not passed. However, it happens that for some reason people cannot or do not want to be together anymore, despite their feelings. This letter will either logically end your relationship, or encourage your loved one to radically change the circumstances that are preventing your complete reunion.

First you need to write about the most important thing - about your love for this man. Tell us what warm emotions you experience when you see him and communicate with him. Then devote a few lines to the problem that does not allow you to stay together. Tell us about how hard it is for you to put up with this circumstance and the realization that your love gradually began to provoke the emergence of many difficult thoughts. Note that you tried to accept the situation, but you understand that by doing this you are only making things worse for yourself, and therefore for your union. Let the man read that this decision is not easy for you, and you will undoubtedly suffer because of it, but in the current situation you cannot leave everything as it was before.

After such a letter, there can be two outcomes - your loved one will change the situation and deal with the difficulties that are interfering with your happiness, or he will simply remain inactive, disappearing from your sight or persuading you to come to terms with the circumstances. In the second case, you should gather your strength and, following the text of your message, try to forget about the feeling that brought you suffering - the sooner you start changing your life, the faster these experiences will be left behind.

Messages are not a magic pill.

Of course, SMS and messages on social networks make it possible to establish a connection with your ex, even if it was he who left you. The text gives a huge advantage, because you can:

think about the answer;
discuss things that are difficult to talk about in person.

But don’t expect that after writing just a couple of messages, your ex-boyfriend will immediately be on his knees at your door asking you to take him back. A constant dialogue should be created between you over some time. There is no need to rush in this matter; on the contrary, try to get to know your ex again, as if you had just met.

Progressive movements towards each other will help build contact, and most importantly, understand whether it is worth starting a relationship with your ex after a breakup.

How to write a farewell SMS

Breakup message to a loved one who offended you

Sometimes situations occur, as a result of which you understand for sure that the time has come to part with your chosen one. If this realization came after a man had inflicted a serious offense, then he is unlikely to be very surprised by your message. Explain to your ex-lover that in light of recent events, you cannot and do not want to continue communicating with him. Wish him all the best and ask him not to disturb him anymore. Perhaps the man will try to apologize, but if you are convinced that you cannot forgive the offense, simply avoid dialogue with him.

Farewell SMS to ex-boyfriend

It happens that the romance is already over, but you feel the need to tell your ex-boyfriend what you didn’t have time to say when breaking up. There is no point in torturing yourself by holding back these impulses - unsaid words will torment you for a long time, and you will experience all the delights of the “unclosed gestalt”. You replay phrases in your head that were not spoken, and this means that you partially remained in that relationship. Send the guy what’s bothering you in an SMS, ending with the phrase: “I won’t bother you anymore, and I don’t want you to bother me, thinking that I need communication. I just wanted to write these words because I regretted that I didn’t voice them right away.” In general, honest and simple.

SMS about breakup

The essence of such an SMS is not to enter into subsequent correspondence. The guy should not understand you in two ways or think that you are simply not in the mood and wanted to annoy him in such a strange way. Write that you have thought about a lot and realized that your relationship has no prospects. Clarify what caused this realization. End the text by saying that it’s hard for you because everything turned out this way, but you have finally decided everything for yourself, and ask him to accept this fact. Give thanks for all the good things, and, if appropriate, ask for forgiveness for the offense caused. Your decision is firm and was not a momentary weakness? Then don’t get involved in the dialogue, let this SMS really become a farewell message.