Lack of communication - reasons, how to fill the void, what needs to be done

Lack of communication is a common problem in developed societies. It is expressed in a deterioration in the quality of communication connections among some members of social groups and a decrease in their intensity.

Psychologists include gradually developing alienation, autism, and loneliness as communication difficulties caused by its deficit.
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An important step to success in life is effective communication.
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Why should you learn to communicate effectively?

Some people may find the idea that we have to consciously think about how we speak or write messages to be ridiculous. But we communicate with people for most of our days, and life in general. Be it verbally in meetings, over a cup of coffee in the break room, or through social networks and instant messengers from home. In any case, it is very important that we can clearly state our point of view and understand our interlocutor.

Excellent communication skills will not only help you in everyday life. But they can play a crucial role when it comes to job interviews, resolving conflicts with parents, friends, work colleagues, and so on. Having the ability to put your thoughts into words in a concise and polite manner will not only make you a pleasant conversationalist, but will also save you time and energy. At the same time, you avoid repeated explanations. Being an effective communicator will help you build relationships with people more successfully. In addition, you will feel confident in any situation.

The problem of personality activity in modern psychology

Lecture outline

Engelman syndrome (“happy doll”).

Develops with:

deletion of section 15 of the mother's chromosome.
uniparental disomy of chromosome 15 of paternal origin.

Manifestations: inadequate happy smile, profound mental retardation, sharp puppet-like convulsive movements.

Methods for studying hereditary diseases (see textbook - page 129).

1. The problem of personality activity in modern psychology.

2. Factors that determine the activity of the individual.

3. Ways of personal behavior, individual personal strategies

4. Typology of personality activity.

Activity is an integral property and state of any living organism, including humans. Without activity, a person cannot exist either as a biological being or as a member of society. The category of activity is the basis of scientific knowledge about the psyche, mental development, cognitive and creative capabilities of the individual.

The study of the nature, mechanisms of origin, development and manifestation of human activity is extremely important in order to find effective means and ways to promote the formation of individual activity aimed at improving one’s own well-being and the well-being of society. The modern understanding of the nature, sources, forms and types, content and mechanisms, formation and manifestations of human activity is formed on the basis of an analysis of the results of theoretical and experimental studies of problems of behavior, activity, communication, cognition, actions and their motivation.

Psychological problems of human activity were addressed by the work of many domestic psychologists of different times. However, the foundations of a modern understanding of the nature of human activity are laid primarily in the works of M.Ya. Basova, L.S. Vygotsky, S.L. Rubinshteina, D.N. Uznadze. At M.Ya. Basov's person acts as an active figure in the environment. L.S. Vygotsky (1960), developing the idea of individual activity, considers the influence of the historical experience of mankind, concentrated in signs, on the formation of human activity. S.L. Rubinstein (1934) formulated the principle of the unity of consciousness and activity. He viewed activity as a form of activity specific to a person. In the attitude theory developed by D.N. Uznadze (1961), based on consideration of the development of the subject’s attitude, the patterns of mental activity are analyzed.

The work of N.A. is devoted to the problem of the psychophysiological nature of activity. Bernstein, P.K. Anokhina, A.R. Luria and a number of other scientists. The social nature of activity is given the greatest attention in the works of B.F. Lomova, K.A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya, E.V. Shorokhova.

The problem of activity has not lost its relevance and practical significance for many years. Also A.N. Leontyev wrote in one of his latest publications: “Along with the problem of attitude, another, perhaps the most difficult problem, has also opened up in psychological analysis. This is the problem of activity phenomena that form difficult-to-catch experimentally, but nevertheless real moments of human activity, elevating it above the function of direct or indirect adaptation to the existing or expected requirements of the situation. These moments constitute, as it were, an internal prerequisite for the self-propulsion of activity and its self-expression. But this problem, which we constantly encounter in living human life, remains now barely touched by experimental research, and its development to a large extent remains a matter for the future.

Activity is studied at the physiological, psychophysiological, mental and social levels. This multidimensional approach to the study of activity is explained by its versatility, multi-level nature, and complexity. In fact, any psychological formation of a person, any physiological, psychological and social manifestations of a person are associated with the phenomenon of activity.

Domestic and foreign psychologists continue to intensively develop various aspects of the problem of activity. The principle of human activity in Russian psychology is based on the activity approach to the study of the psyche.

In recent years, many psychologists have turned to the problem of subjectivity and subjective mental activity (A.V. Brushlinsky, A.K. Osnitsky, V.A. Petrovsky, V.I. Slobodchikov, V.O. Tatenko, V.E. Chudnovsky and etc.). A significant contribution to the study of the problem of personality activity was made by V.A. Petrovsky. He developed the concept of non-adaptive (supra-situational) activity and the related concept of personalization. Especially a lot of theoretical and experimental research is carried out on the psychophysiology of self-regulation of behavior, activity in general, activity (M.V. Bodunov, E.A. Golubeva, A.I. Krupnoe, V.M. Rusalov, etc.).

Activity is the subject’s constant resolution of the problems of his life, even in the absence of pronounced forms of action and behavior. The space of activity - passivity exists as a field of struggle of motives, choice of forms of action, affirmation of principles, etc., where passivity occupies an important place in the development of the subject's position. Activity/passivity is a complexly structured state, inherent in different forms to each individual. Therefore, it is very important to distinguish between different types, levels and forms of activity.

When considering human activity, its most different levels and types are identified and analyzed: - physiological (Vladimir Bekhterev, Ivan Pavlov, I.M. Sechenii, L.A. Ukhtomsky, etc.); — psychophysiological (K. Anokhin, N.A. Bernshtein, M.V. Vodunov, E.A. Golubeva, A.I. Krupnoye, A.R. Luria, V.D. Nebylitsyn); - mental (Mikhail Basov, Lev Vygotsky, Alexey Leontiev, V.N. Myasishchev, Sergei Rubinstein, Dmitry Uznadze, etc.); — social (K.A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya, A.G. Asmolov, B.F. Pomov, E.V. Shorokhova, etc.); - subjective (V.A. Petrovsky, V.I. Slobodchikov, V.O. Tatenko, V.E. Chudnovsky).

So, Ananyev B.G. identified three main forms of human activity: cognition, work and communication, which manifest themselves in the process of life in connection with the solution of certain problems, in specific actions.

As a special form of activity, technical and scientific creativity stands out, considered by many researchers (E.S. Chugunova, E.S. Kuzmin, A.L. Zhuravlev, A.I. Kitov, B.F. Lomov, etc.).

Forms of activity also include: reflection and behavior (V.I. Sekun); value-oriented, transformative, creative, communicative, artistic (M.S. Kagan); Practical, cognitive (A.A. Grachev); information and communication, incentive (G.M. Andreeva, L.A. Karpenko, B.F. Lomoa)

According to D.N. Uznadze, forms of activity form a certain hierarchy:

• individual activity - communication, consumption, satisfaction of curiosity, play;

• activity of the subject - satisfaction of aesthetic needs, entertainment, caring for others and oneself, fulfilling social requirements;

• personal activity - artistic creativity, mental and physical sports, service work, social activities.

A.V. Brushlinsky calls all the above forms types of activity, complementing them with contemplation. In addition, in modern psychological literature, human activity is divided into voluntary and involuntary forms of its manifestation.

How to identify the problem of ineffective communication?

Many people realize that they have problems with communication skills. But they don't know what exactly they need to work on. To determine this, anyone can ask a friend, relative, romantic partner, or colleague to help them figure it out. I am sure that many of your loved ones will be happy to help you find ways to improve yourself and improve yourself. So get feedback from them first. Ask them to be honest with you and point out your communication problems.

How cool your character is!

“Loneliness is when your loved ones and friends are not around”, “I became lonely when my dog died”, “Loneliness is old age”, “If I don’t receive a single text message a day, I feel absolutely alone!” That is, loneliness, just like happiness, is understood differently by everyone. Some people feel a sense of their own uselessness and even inferiority, some have withdrawn into themselves and believe that being cut off from others is their personal destiny and destiny, while others, despite all their desire and repeated attempts, are unable to establish the desired social connections. But without understanding the reason, it is impossible to help a person. And in some cases, it turns out that there is no need to help, because sometimes loneliness is far-fetched...

Four Main Areas of Communication Skills

Careful Listening

Listening attentively to your interlocutor is the most common problem that almost every person needs to work on. After all, we all tend to get distracted during a conversation. Or think about something of your own when talking with a person. Quite often we simply give out some kind of answer, without actually hearing what we were asked. Most of the time, we think more about what we need to say next.

Learning to listen carefully to a person means not only listening carefully to his words, but also to their pronunciation. You need to pay attention to the person's hand movements and other nonverbal signs. It literally means giving your full attention to the speaker and being genuinely interested in him. Careful listeners use clarifying and reflective techniques. To confirm what the other person said and avoid confusion. These techniques clearly demonstrate that you are focusing all your attention on a specific person.

Non-verbal communication

Effective communication largely depends on understanding a person's body language. In addition, a huge proportion of any conversation occurs non-verbally. And in some cases it can reach up to 80%. Therefore, we also need to consider and understand non-verbal communication. Especially when it is absent or limited. For example, when you communicate in writing or by phone.

By nonverbal communication I mean our body language. But beyond that, it includes the tone of our voice, the person's movements, eye contact and facial expression. This means that we can better understand the interlocutor by paying enough attention to his body language. In addition, thanks to non-verbal communication, you can make sure that your message was received correctly and that you understand each other.

Emotional Awareness

The third area of communication that many people need to work on is understanding our own emotions. As well as understanding the emotions of other people and the ability to manage these emotions. After all, we are all human. Consequently, we may find it difficult to manage our feelings and emotions. None of us can leave our emotions elsewhere and not be influenced by them. We don't need to try to do that.

Solving a problem by talking out loud

Surely every person has had a situation when he explained a problem to his friend and, before he found something to answer, he came up with a solution himself. After all, sometimes the fact of explaining a problem out loud is enough to solve it.

How and why does this simple method work? How can you take control of it and learn to manage it?

There are three significant advantages to using this method.

Clarifying Thoughts

In order to put your problem into communication form, you must clarify it by describing it in objective terms. To formulate a problem out loud, you need to organize your mental information that concerns it. Additionally, by expressing the problem more precisely, you can eliminate the psychological noise in your head, such as frustration and anxiety.

Expressing a problem in words allows you to capture it, because language is not only a way of communication, but also a tool for thoughts.

Uncovering Assumptions

Explaining your problem to someone else is especially effective when you assume that the person has absolutely no knowledge to advise you. The Golden Rule works especially well for solving problems if you explain them as if you were telling them to your grandmother.

By assuming that the other person has absolutely no understanding of your problem, you focus on what you know instead of developing solutions. By making your knowledge and assumptions explicit and understandable, you can notice information that you missed, which will give you a new stream of correct thoughts.

Involving other parts of the brain in solving a problem

When you say a problem out loud, you use more parts of your brain than when you simply think about it. That's why when you simply pretend to explain a problem to someone else, it is helpful in solving it.

Spoken words activate physical processes in the body: diaphragm, tongue, lips, vocal cords. Hearing words engages the parts of the brain that are closest to the brain.

If explaining the problem out loud does not require an interlocutor at all, why do you need one in this case? He's not needed. Next time a problem arises, try explaining it to an inanimate object rather than just to nothing.

It may seem strange and abnormal to you to talk to inanimate objects (we have all heard about such people and what happened to them later), but this method works. By the way, it is sometimes used by programmers and it is called Rubber Ducking (rubber duck method).

Nobody tells you that you should absolutely only use a rubber duck or any inanimate object. It just so happens that we are alone in the apartment and the problem does not go away. Or our acquaintances begin to avoid us because we tell them about our problems too often.

Benefits of talking to a rubber duck:

Rubber ducks won't interrupt you or interfere with your flow of thoughts.
You don't have to worry about distracting the rubber duck. In principle, she is not busy with anything serious.
Rubber ducks don't spread rumors about your problems to other ducks.

Remember that talking to a rubber duck only seems strange when another person sees you. In all other cases this is normal. Besides, no one says that from now on your interlocutor should only be a duck. Share your problem with your friends, just don’t overburden them, because they also don’t have much time.

So what could be your rubber duck?

Actually, the rubber duck itself.
Six Dilbert characters. These are six figures that you can buy or make yourself: Dilbert, Boss, Dogbert, Cuthbert, Alice and Wally. By the way, the similarity with de Bono’s six hats is simply amazing. If the rubber duck method seems strange to you, then why doesn't the same method of putting on an imaginary hat seem strange to you?
Any other figurine. There are a lot of figurines that differ in material and the emotions they evoke.

Jokes aside, having a more or less real interlocutor is always important. When you speak into the void, you do not involve any social emotions, and you are extremely calm and reasonable. In many cases, this is indeed appropriate behavior, but if you are relying on insight and intuition, then you need to realize that you are communicating with a real interlocutor.

In general, insight often occurs when we think. It is unlikely to come to us just out of nowhere. We must suffer through it, think it over, consider it from different angles. That is why social communication is so important in this case. It triggers a different manner of communication and thinking, different emotions, and even allows you to put on masks of different social roles. Of course, this may not work, but it won’t make it worse.

Say the problem statement out loud and share it with friends and family. If the solution does not come during the formulation of the problem, it may come after the interlocutor’s questions, his clarifications, narrowing and expanding the problem in his eyes. In addition, our eyes may be so blurred that we may not notice the elementary answer that is right under our nose.

And best of all, make a wide variety of friends, with different thoughts and worldviews. Communication with them will allow you to become a well-rounded person. Plus, you can later use their world map, whether consciously or not.

What can you say about problems that can be solved out loud? Does this technique work for you personally? Leave your opinions in the comments.

We also recommend reading:

Storytelling
Gyorgy's Problem Solving Technique
Einstein's Problem Solving Techniques
Three quick and effective methods for solving problems
How to find the source of the problem
FOCUS problem solving technique
The Simplex Method for Solving Business Problems
How to stop thinking too much
Decision making system PrOACT
8D technology for finding solutions
Problem Solving Toolkit

Key words:1Psychoregulation

Written communication is also very important

Effective communication doesn't end with just the words spoken. Email, text messages, correspondence on social networks. All this also plays an important role in relationships with people. Many people don't like reading a wall of text in an email or instant messenger. They also don't like being bombarded with a large number of messages from the same person. Such messages are very tiring and inconvenient to read. So if we are talking about effective written communication. Clear sentences or precise labels that detail the topic without being too long are ideal.

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Comfort zone for an introvert

Article on the topic Steep turns.
Why do people change their lives dramatically? This is where a man lives. And he seems to live well: he has his own apartment, pets, home work, and even a partner who is pleasant in all respects, who, however, lives separately, but this is even more convenient. However, from time to time this same person hears from all sides: “You work at home, that is, you don’t communicate with your colleagues? Are you not a member of the cat and dog lovers club? Aren't you afraid that there will be no one to hand you a glass of water? What loneliness! How we sympathize with you!” And gradually different thoughts creep into your head: maybe it’s true that life, which until recently seemed quite pleasant, is in fact an empty vegetation of a lonely person, almost useless to anyone? Stereotypes also play an important role in such conclusions. In a pharmacy, a clinic, a store, or in magazines, we often come across advertising photographs with the cutest elderly couples who are treated together, buy medicine, make successful purchases, and after righteous labors relax with their children and grandchildren in a charming countryside. They are definitely happy! But perhaps we don’t...

Of course, such couples exist in reality, but, alas, not in such quantities as intrusive advertising drums into us. All these wonderful photos of a staged family idyll, as a rule, can be bought in a centralized photo bank, and it is likely that the majority of these happy families are made up of specially selected photo models. And it’s not a fact that the lives of these fashion models are many times more successful than ours.

If you are an introvert, that is, a person whose mental makeup is characterized by a focus on your inner world, if you have not been inclined to intensive communication since childhood and experience more suffering from a long stay in a cheerful company than from reading classics for many hours, then the criteria for your loneliness are different - not what others want to impose on you. Do you think you suffer from loneliness? Try to figure out whether this is really suffering caused by a lack of communication. Or suffering from the fact that you don’t live the way it’s advertised?

Inside or outside. Who are you: an introvert or an extrovert?