A study of success using the example of outstanding people: how an ordinary person can find meaning in life and find his main goal.
For ten years, Gary Keller, an American writer, had a growing business and doing great. But despite all the work and efforts, everything went wrong. Geri had a feeling of complete collapse. He worked hard, delved into all the difficulties, but nothing worked out. Are you familiar with a similar picture? In business or in personal affairs, it happens that everything begins to unravel, guidelines are lost, there is no understanding of what is important and what to do.
After reading this article, you will learn how to find fundamental meaning in your affairs. Based on this meaning, you can easily determine what is important and what is secondary, and you will always know where to direct your efforts. This meaning shows the direction to the desired future and at the same time is a 100% motivator for its achievement.
The secret of making your plans come true, or the inner strength to follow your intentions
Why look for the meaning of your life?
What if your meaning in life is to be truly happy? Austrian psychiatrist Viktor Frankl thought about this. He founded logotherapy, a therapy designed to help people find meaning in their lives.
In his opinion, a person must seek and find the deepest meaning of his existence in order to flourish.
Frankl observed that his patients suffered primarily from an enormous existential emptiness—a source of anxiety and depression.
- 8 Ways Modern Society Causes Existential Emptiness
In his book Unlocking the Meaning of Your Life, he explains that “existential emptiness can have several aspects. The search for meaning in life is sometimes replaced by a search for power, including the desire to earn more and more money. In other cases, it is replaced by the search for pleasure.”
Everyone on earth has a task, a purpose. We all have a freely chosen mission to complete. Moreover, the fact of feeling that you are useful is a source of satisfaction and therefore happiness! A person is happy when life has meaning.
How to find the meaning of life through what you love: the story of Gary Keller
“Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."
— George Bernard Shaw
Gary Keller dealt with the crisis, and then wrote a book that became a bestseller: “Start with the main thing! One amazingly simple law of phenomenal success.” What did Gehry do? He stopped doing a lot of unimportant things. After analyzing the situation, he chose one main thing and focused only on that. After that, everything moved from a dead point in the company of Gary Keller. You might be wondering, how can you find that essential item? This is indeed the key question. We will clarify this a little further.
To solve his problem, Gary Keller acted in accordance with the third habit of highly effective people, which was formulated by the famous researcher of the laws of success Stephen Covey.
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The essence of the third skill according to Stephen Covey is the ability in your affairs to separate the important from the secondary and unnecessary, and the ability to focus on the important, saying “no” to everything else. This way of organizing your affairs creates the best efficiency in moving towards results. But there are three obstacles to implementing the third habit of highly effective people in their lives:
- It may be unclear how to choose what's important. This happens if priorities are poorly developed - skill 2 according to Stephen Covey (read my article).
- There may be a variety of fears and concerns that push you away from the main task. For example, worrying about what they will think of me or that I am worse than others, or being afraid of not meeting the expectations of significant people. The list goes on.
- Temptations can get in the way: have a good time, do what you emotionally like and bring pleasure.
Why is it that some people manage to devote their time to the most important things, while others waste their time escaping from fears or on entertainment and temptations? What is the secret of the ability to effectively organize your activities?
What distinguishes people who have been able to find meaning and purpose in life? Strong goals!
What is the meaning of your life?
Maybe you're one of those people who doesn't believe you have a purpose or who believes life has no meaning. Or you don't see the point in achieving a higher goal.
So, ask yourself: what is the point of acting aimlessly? It's not about your job or daily responsibilities or your goals. It's about the real reason for your existence. The purpose and value of your life. This is the meaning of your life!
Let's say you have life goals: study, work, start a family, buy a house, go on vacation, and then retire. Inspiring?
Maybe you'll realize in your 40s, 50s, or retirement that you lacked global vision. Your current dissatisfaction may already be telling you that something is missing in your life. Or you're depressed and don't know why.
It's never too late to find the meaning of life. The sooner you realize this, the happier your existence will be.
Giving meaning to your life gives it direction. You can give meaning to your life by helping a neighbor, raising children, or pursuing a professional life. It doesn't matter how, as long as it's of the utmost importance to you.
Giving meaning to your life is used to determine exactly what you want. Avoid what you don't want and what doesn't give you pleasure. And above all, it helps to know why and how to get what makes you happy.
GuruTest
The meaning of life is not found by everyone and not always. Often, in order to understand what the highest plan is, you need to make many mistakes and wrong steps. We must learn from our mistakes so as not to lose the thread that leads us to new horizons. Problems begin where motivation ends and consciousness becomes poor. Do not lose this internal reserve of energy so that over time you will come to an understanding of what is happening around you and what is the meaning of everything that is happening.
What is consciousness and awareness
To be as brief as possible, consciousness can be defined as the ability to think and perceive the world around us from a spiritual point of view. Consciousness is what distinguishes us from animals. Yes, some mammals can have some kind of pseudo-consciousness, like elephants, dolphins or whales. These are smart animals, but they cannot think about the meaning of life, because they still only have basic animal needs such as food and sleep as priorities.
People realize that they live for a reason or live in a huge world full of secrets. Awareness is the final point in the development of some thought. These are answers to serious and existential questions that our life experience or the life experience of other people gives us.
Consciousness helps us not to remain in place, but to move forward, exploring the world and getting to know it from all sides. The peak of all this is the awareness of one’s place, the meaning of life. For animals, the meaning of life is reproduction. For people it is hidden because we do not know what will happen after death. Here the question of faith arises.
Preparing for the next life
There are many facts that the invisible world of the dead surrounds us. Some people do not believe in this, but most people believe that after death their consciousness or, as they say, soul, passes into another dimension. Yes, this is fiction, but for devout people it is reality. They are so deep in their faith that they do not even dispute the fact that after death another life awaits them, in a better place. They may be right, but we will never know. At least we won't know until we die.
It is easier for a believer and religious person to find the meaning of life, because he knows that life is just a transitional moment that leads us to the real world. This is a test of strength, of suitability. The meaning of life for believers is to be good, although this cannot always be done. From the point of view of evolution and the improvement of life itself, this philosophy is not entirely suitable, but it is not bad either. Religion does not completely reject science, so for many this meaning of life is very good.
Of course, you may become a victim of attacks from those who want to see common sense in everything, but that's another story. Religion does not always help people to be good, just like its absence.
Help for next generations
Often, people who have the healthy habit of taking action rather than sitting idly by understand that the meaning of life is to make the world a better place for their children or the people who will live after them. It is possible that you will also have to understand this in the future. Think about what happens next. Now the world is sliding into the abyss, because science is not creative, but destructive in relation to the planet. Our house will soon turn into a huge garbage dump, overpopulated with people. We are the virus of planet Earth, because because of us the planet suffers.
We need to radically change our approach to life in order to at least slow down the rate of environmental and air pollution. We can no longer live the way we live now. Scientists give us no more than 30 years, after which collapse will begin, complete and almost irreversible. “Almost”, because correcting our own mistakes will be much more difficult. Rich and smart people join forces to make the world a better place. Someone sets such a goal for themselves at an early age, making saving the Earth the meaning of life. In combination with a religious worldview, this gives a unique effect, although atheists also find it much easier to live in such a situation.
Psychology of complete indifference
In this case, a person understands that there is no meaning in life, because it will end in any case. Yes, this is a slightly selfish attitude, but people are all selfish at their core, so seeing everything as just the absence of any meaning is also normal. We achieve something, lose it, achieve it again, but what is it all for? Some will say that for the sake of a higher goal, but what exactly? Going to heaven, helping people, earning a lot of money - this is not the same. The problem or its solution is that any life ends, be it a super long, beautiful, dull, eventful life. This is often called the highest degree of pessimism, but, in fact, it is realism.
The reality is that you will end your existence in this world in any case. You just need to relax and have fun. The only thing that should restrain you from doing bad things is the belief that a higher mind in the person of God or the Universe will punish you for it. Respect other people, even if you have realized that life does not have much meaning.
We do not consider the local purpose of life, such as having children or self-affirmation. It is important for every person to decide why all people live, why this world exists. It is important to believe in something and always strive for something. You need to choose your life path in advance so that you don’t have problems with motivation later.
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25.02.2018 01:08
“Start living right away and consider each day a separate life”
Seneca
Abraham Maslow identified a set of needs that underlie all motivation, and therefore all action. He classified them into 6 categories:
- physiological needs (food, drink, sleep),
- need for security (housing, money),
- the need for achievement (development of one’s knowledge, values and potential),
- need for belonging (family, community),
- need for respect (feeling of being usefulness),
- the need to transcend oneself (invest in a cause that goes beyond oneself).
Needs and meaning
When the basic needs (physiological and safety) are satisfied, then the person seeks to satisfy other needs. Without a larger context, we are primed to respond to our physiological needs, safety, and belonging.
Goals need a larger context to be important and meaningful and to make us deeply happy. In fact, it is a context that includes self-esteem, achievement, and self-mastery.
The need for respect corresponds to recognition and self-confidence. In terms of need for achievement, it means that a person is working towards realizing his or her own potential.
Finally, the need to surpass oneself implies the renunciation of one's own needs associated with reasons external to oneself.
According to Maslow, a fully developed person will be guided by values that transcend his or her personality while serving others.
Context and meaning
Thus, there are 2 types of context that give meaning to goals: necessity and purpose (meaning in life). If you have no purpose in life, then you are stuck in a limited context of need.
Your life is only about physical and emotional survival. And your motivation to set and achieve goals will wane as you achieve them. Which will lead you to dissatisfaction and depression.
The context of purpose goes beyond need satisfaction and is essential to happiness. It coexists with and exceeds needs-based goals. Because there is more to life than just meeting your physical, emotional and personal needs.
Recommendations
I bring to your attention tips that will be relevant every day.
- Study yourself. Determine your character, temperament, value orientations, and capabilities.
- Learn to filter everything you hear. Don't believe everything they tell you, have your own point of view.
- Maintain confidence in your own abilities and professional qualities. Have a personal value system, do not neglect it.
- Learn to treat other people as individuals, each with their own strengths and weaknesses.
- Learn to act according to your conscience.
- Realize that the meaning of life lies between the desired ideal and reality. You don’t have to look for the right solution, choose the one that is most appropriate and important for you at the moment, in a specific place.
- There is no need to be fooled by stereotypes about a normal profession, like others. If you have the opportunity to engage in innovative activities, for example, introduce video blogs, go for it.
- Follow your interests and values. Accept the fact that any field of activity can be prestigious. It is important that work brings pleasure. You need to understand that doing something you don’t like will not make you happy and will not allow you to achieve heights.
- Engage in self-development, improve your knowledge, develop hard work.
Now you know where to find meaning in life. Remember that you should not give up and fall into a hopeless situation. You can always find a way out, in any situation, decide on a goal in life, and go towards achieving it. Every person can become happy if they make some effort.
How to find the meaning of life
There are different methods to find the meaning of your life, your purpose, your mission. All methods are more or less similar. But these two below are simple and actually work. In addition, they complement each other and therefore make it easier to achieve the goal.
Find the meaning of life with rational intelligence
This method is about using your mind and your logic, starting with your context. Here the context is all your beliefs about reality. To define your purpose, you start with the context of reality that you project onto yourself.
Starting with your current understanding of reality, your beliefs, where do you belong? This projection becomes your goal.
If you don't like the goal you get with this method, it's because you don't like the context it's based on. Redefine your context.
Find meaning in your life with emotional intelligence
Take a blank sheet of paper or open a text document on your computer. Write “What is the true meaning of my life?”
Write the answer that comes to you. Think again and write a different answer. Repeat until you write an answer that makes you cry. This is your true purpose in life.
It takes 15-20 minutes to get rid of the social conditioning that forces you to somehow see the purpose of your life.
You will formulate “false responses” that evoke a little emotion and reflect part of your goal. When you start getting answers like this, keep going, you're almost there. When you find your purpose, you will know. It will resonate deeply with you and you will feel incredible energy.
Use both methods
You can use both methods. Your rational intelligence and your emotional intelligence may have different words about your goal, but overall they will go in the same direction.
If not, it means that your context is not clear and that you are seeing reality rationally on the one hand and emotionally on the other.
Your goal may end up seeming abstract and lofty. This is fine. The next step is to divide it into several goals, projects and actions.
- How to make a life plan in 7 steps, and why you need it
How to find the meaning of life in 20 minutes?
How to find out the true meaning of your life? I'm not talking about your job, your daily responsibilities, or even your future plans. I mean the main, true meaning of your being here - the root cause of your existence.
Perhaps you share the views of nihilists who do not believe that life has any meaning at all. It doesn't matter. Not believing that there is a meaning to life will not stop you from discovering it for yourself, just as not believing in gravity will not prevent you from falling if you stumble. Lack of belief that life has meaning and purpose will only add time, and if you're one of those people, just replace the number 20 in the title of this article with 40 (or 60 if you're really stubborn). Although, if you don't believe in your life's purpose, you probably won't believe what I say. But even if this is so, the maximum that you will lose by completing this exercise is an hour of time.
But first, a story about Bruce Lee, which will set the right mood for our little exercise. A certain martial artist approached Bruce Lee with a request to teach him everything that Bruce knew about martial arts. Bruce picked up two cups filled with water. “The first mug,” Bruce said, “represents all your martial arts knowledge. The second is all my knowledge about them. If you want to fill your vessel with my knowledge, you must first empty it of your knowledge.”
If you want to discover the true meaning of life, you must first clear your mind of all the false ideas about it that you have been taught before (including the idea that there is no meaning at all).
So how do you find the meaning of life? Although there are many ways to do this, and some of them are quite confusing, I will give you the easiest way. The more open you are to this process, the more you believe in it, the faster you will get results. But even if you are completely closed in on yourself, and you have serious doubts that this works at all, or you think that this method is designed for idiots and is just a waste of time, all this will not be an obstacle to the work, and the result will still be It will happen, the process will just take a little longer.
What to do:
Take a blank piece of paper or open your favorite word processor (I choose the latter because it's faster) Write at the top: “What is my meaning in life? » Write down the answer (any answer) that appeared in your head. It doesn't have to be a complete sentence. A short phrase is enough. Repeat step 3 until the written answer makes you scream. This will be the meaning of your life. That's all. It makes no difference whether you are a consultant, an engineer or a weightlifter. Some people will find deep meaning in this simple exercise. Others will think he is stupid. Usually, it takes 15-20 minutes to clear your head of garbage and goals imposed by the surrounding society. False answers will come from your consciousness and memory. But when the final, true answer appears, you will feel that it came from a completely different source.
More on the blog: Tips that will free you from other people’s opinions
For those who have not previously paid attention to awareness of their lives, the process of spilling out false answers will take longer, perhaps more than an hour. But if you are persistent, after 100, 200 or even 500 responses, you will be amazed by an answer that will cause you a storm of emotions, an answer that will literally shock you. If you've never done this before, all of the above may seem stupid to you. It’s okay, even if it seems like it, do this exercise anyway.
During this exercise, some answers will be very similar to each other. Perhaps they will even be repeated. Then you should change your point of view and write 10-20 answers, looking at the problem from a different perspective. This is the right approach. You can write down any answer that comes to your mind during the exercise.
At some point (usually after 50-100 answers) you will want to quit this activity, without understanding what will happen as a result of all this. You'll want to get up and do something else. This is fine. You have to overcome this resistance and just keep writing. The feeling of resistance will gradually pass.
You may come across a few answers that touch your emotions, but not very much, not to the point of screaming - these are just pieces of your goal. Mark these phrases, and as you progress, you can return to them, refine and develop them. Each such answer is a piece of your goal, but only a small piece of it. However, the fact that you began to stumble upon similar answers means that you are moving in the right direction and are approaching your main goal. Continue in the same spirit.
It is important to do this exercise alone, without any distractions. If you are a “nihilist”, then you can start with the answer “I have no purpose in life” or “Life is meaningless”, and continue in the same spirit. If you are persistent, sooner or later you will get to the true answers.
Also on the blog: Rules for a smart wife. 15 tricks to help you save your marriage
When I did this exercise it took me 25 minutes and I got the result at step 106. Particles of the main response (emotional outbursts) appeared at steps 17, 39 and 53, then there was a lull, and at steps 100-106 everything was finally formed. I felt resistance (the desire to get up and do something else, it seemed to me that nothing would work, I felt impatience and even irritation) somewhere around 55-60 steps. At step 80, I took a 2-minute break, closed my eyes, relaxed, cleared my mind and focused on the meaning of the answers that had already come to me - this turned out to be useful, and the answers that I began to receive after the break became clearer.
This is my result: to live boldly and consciously, in harmony with love and compassion, to awaken the strength of spirit in those around me and to leave this world at peace.
When you find your own answer to the question of existence, you will feel how deeply it touches you. The words of your answer will seem to be filled with some kind of spiritual energy, and you will feel it every time you reread them.
However, finding your meaning in life is the easy part. And the hard part is constantly keeping it in mind and working on yourself, steadily moving towards realizing this goal.
If you want to ask why this little exercise works, just postpone the question until you have successfully completed the practice. When you go through it, chances are you'll get your own answer as to why it works. If you ask 10 people (who have successfully completed the exercise) why it works, you will get 10 different answers, filtered through each of those people's belief systems, but each answer will reflect the truth.
Obviously, the exercise will not work if you complete it before you get the result. My guess is that 80-90% of people will find their answer in less than an hour. If you are strong in your beliefs and resist the process, you may need to undertake 5 sets of 3 hours. But I suspect that such people will give up sooner (most likely after the first 15 minutes) or will not try at all. And if you are reading this blog (and are not going to throw it out of your life), then you certainly do not fall into this group.
Try it! At the very least you will learn one of two things: your purpose in life, or that you should stop reading this blog.
