In our lives, with a huge flow of information, stress that awaits us at every step, it is very important to sometimes get away from everyday affairs, immerse ourselves in ourselves and abstract ourselves from the whole world around us.
What we hear most often when a stressful situation occurs is: “distract yourself.” If you were rude in a store or subway, ignore it; problems at work, ignore it; problems in the family, ignore it. Recently this expression has become very fashionable.
Let's turn to dictionaries to understand this issue. So, in the explanatory dictionary the word “abstract” means: “To abstract from non-existent aspects, properties or connections of an object or phenomenon in order to highlight their essential features.”
There is also an interpretation of the verb “to abstract”: “To consider an object or phenomenon, highlighting its essential, natural features and abstracting from their non-essential aspects, properties, connections.”
Another interesting interpretation:
The verb “abstract” comes from the word “abstraction”. Abstraction is usually called something abstract and conceptual, not strictly tied to momentary earthly realities.
“Abstract” can mean to rise above the situation, to be distracted, to look at the situation more broadly, on a larger scale, or neutrally, like an outside observer.
What is abstract thinking?
The mental activity of any animal is limited to specific concepts and goals, which consist in the desire to obtain the required amount of food and give offspring. Most people are more complex.
There is a well-known story about a famous fashion designer who began his lecture with a proposal to imagine that the human body is shaped like a ball. Part of the shocked audience left the hall, and completely in vain. The rest of the material was very interesting, and the example demonstrated the need for the ability to abstract. This applies not only to sewing suits and dresses, but to almost any type of human activity.
In the process of work, problems arise, which are sometimes so numerous that the task seems impossible. Difficulties multiply, they begin to acquire cross-connections, and it is no longer clear where to start. In such a situation, the most effective method of sequentially solving many problems is analysis, that is, dividing the general problem into a number of simpler ones.
Memorization
Many schoolchildren and students are faced with the problem of memorizing certain material. Sometimes it happens that the material turns out to be too difficult to understand, or simply not understandable. It all comes down to the lack of a specific example (let’s say) on which to consider the material being learned. A tired consciousness rejects the complex information it receives, while grasping any other information. Any extraneous sounds that begin to distract even more. In order to abstract from this kind of complexity, it is recommended to memorize the material by perceiving the information as a sequence of words.
Determine the main thing
The algorithm, however, does not end there. Each of the components of the overall complex problem requires its own solution, which should be sought abstractly. Temporarily you need to ignore all circumstances that are not related to a narrowly defined issue, or abstract yourself. This skill allows the human mind to make scientific discoveries, create immortal works of art and solve the most complex technical problems.
A scientist, an engineer, and a poet should be able to distinguish the wheat from the chaff, the essential from the insignificant, the important from the unnecessary. But what is the situation like in the everyday life of ordinary people? The ability to abstract, that is, to be distracted from everything unimportant, is very important for every person. According to the poet, our planet is poorly equipped for pleasure. All the time, some circumstances interfere with either working or resting. Achieving ideal conditions for both is extremely difficult, if not impossible. There is only one thing left to do - abstract. This means that if undesirable circumstances arise that interfere with life, and it is impossible to eliminate them, they must be ignored.
In this case, of course, the effect of interference should be minimized by all possible means. For example, to get rid of noise, it is not enough to simply ignore it (not everyone can do this). But you can plug your ears with cotton wool.
How can abstraction help us in everyday life?
Abstraction helps us see the situation as an outside observer, to feel outside the event. At the same time, the emotional dependence on what is happening is removed.
New facets are revealed to a person that he had not noticed before. The problem is to present yourself in a different light. It becomes possible to see the situation from all sides. And an understanding comes of why this happened and how it can be corrected.
The ability to abstract is very useful. This is the ability not to be distracted by external stimuli when you need to concentrate.
The Cure for Fear
The ability to abstract is not only a means of solving many complex problems, but also a sure way to combat fears. For example, if a person is afraid of heights, but is forced to fly often on airplanes, he should distance himself from unpleasant emotions. To do this, it is enough to understand that during the flight his safety does not depend on the passenger. The pilot is responsible for it, and therefore should be concerned. There is also the tired statistical argument that driving a car is much riskier.
In addition, people sometimes have to overcome fears that are much stronger than those that arise in some airline passengers. A well-known soldier's rule says that there is no need to be afraid of death. While a person is alive, she is not there, but as soon as she comes, there will be no one to fear. This is a vivid example of the ability to distance yourself not from danger, of course, but from panic horror that interferes with normal thinking.
You can get a lot of useful knowledge in schools, colleges and universities. There is no comprehensive information about where and how to learn to abstract. There are people who have such talent by nature, but the majority comprehend this wisdom on their own along with gaining life experience.
How to protect yourself from other people's negativity?
There are several ways to protect yourself from the negative energy of people. Sometimes you can use several methods at the same time.
1: Set boundaries and enforce them
Communicating with people who cannot or do not want to solve their problems is an energy-consuming process. This is due to the fact that a suffering person requires a lot of attention, he wants to feel constant moral support, and wants his experiences to be shared with him. If you try to interrupt a person's complaints, he may regard such behavior as rudeness or callousness. In this regard, others try to show sympathy and empathy.
However, it is often difficult to determine where moral support ends and immersion in the problems of another person begins. In order not to get caught up in unnecessary problems, you need to establish a clear distance between the source of negativity and your own experiences.
If communication with a toxic person cannot be avoided for some reason, you should try to change the direction of the conversation. For example, when the interlocutor begins to complain about the current situation, you need to ask him how he is going to solve the problem. Often such questions force a person offended by life to change the topic or begin to look for those who will share their suffering.
2: Don't let the other person make you angry
When a person does not control his emotional reactions, he cannot objectively assess the situation. The difficulty is that negative feelings arise and develop quickly, so not all people can take control of them.
You can get rid of negativity if you learn to maintain composure and not react to provocations or manipulations coming from your interlocutor. If a person could not get angry and remained calm, he will be able to maintain a sober view of things.
It is important to remember that when responding with aggression to aggression, insult to insult, a person begins to lose a lot of energy, which will not be easy to replenish.
3: Suggest switching to lighter topics
Protection from negative energy will become possible if you learn to take control of the situation and be conscious in the process of communication. It often happens that the interlocutor touches on some unimportant subject and begins to share his feelings about it. For example, a person may be dissatisfied with his job. In conversations, he will move on to this topic, complain and seek sympathy from others. Any attempt to give advice or a recommendation will be met aggressively and accompanied by a surge of negative energy.
You should not try to change a person’s attitude to his problems or give him advice. An outsider will not be able to solve them, since they may be deeper than appears at first glance. The right solution would be to change the topic of conversation. It is better to politely interrupt the conversation about some matters and move on to discussing pleasant, positive and easy events. You can tell a funny story, share a pleasant memory, or find it with your interlocutor. This will allow him to escape from obsessive thoughts, and the one who communicates with him will save his energy.
4: Focus on the solution, not the problem
Difficult situations arise in people's lives all the time. A person’s emotional state is influenced not so much by a bad event as by feelings about it. By concentrating thoughts on what happened, the individual loses a lot of energy. Its lack will negatively affect his morale. In the future, he may not have enough strength to take any steps to get out of the situation. It is important not to increase the influence of stress factors, but to immediately start looking for ways to solve the problem.
Trying to improve the situation will help not only protect yourself from negativity, but also feel satisfaction from the ability to remain calm and not get lost in difficult times. In this way, it will be possible to overcome the feeling of anxiety, which also takes a lot of energy.
You can get rid of other people's negativity in the same way. Instead of worrying about the presence of an unpleasant interlocutor, you need to think about what you can do to make communication with him less inconvenient. Worries will fade into the background, this will make it possible to take control of the situation.
5: Disengage from the opinions of others
To succeed, a person must think internally. This means an attitude in which an individual relies only on his own strength. In psychology, this phenomenon is called internal locus of control. Negative people often shift responsibility to others or circumstances. They tend to blame others for what happens in their lives. This approach is called external locus of control.
Worries about what other people will think, how they will behave towards a person, take a lot of energy. A confident, emotionally stable individual will not allow the opinions of others to in any way influence his actions, mood or train of thought. No judgments or caustic remarks will lead him astray from his chosen path. The ability to abstract yourself will allow you to protect yourself not only from the negativity of other people, but also to prevent your own negative emotions from developing.
6: Don't try to fix other people
It is difficult to protect yourself from negativity at work, because you have to communicate with colleagues often. If these are toxic people, there is often a desire to somehow influence them, to change their attitude towards life. It is necessary to firmly understand that this is impossible. When a person experiences pressure, he begins to resist. It takes a lot of energy to fight it.
You need to learn to accept people as they are or break off relationships with them. You can protect yourself from bad people at work by minimizing your contacts with them. However, if even in this case, communication still brings a lot of inconvenience, you should think about changing your place of work, since maintaining emotional health is always more important.
The same tactics are used in relation to close people. Every person has the right to live the way he wants. You cannot impose any ideas on him, even with the best intentions.
7: Take care of yourself
It will be easier to protect yourself from the negative impact of people if you learn to quickly restore your internal resources or replenish them regularly. It is not always possible to remain calm. If a person feels that he has lost a lot of energy in the process of communicating with others, he needs to find a source to maintain mental strength. It's different for everyone. This could be communication with loved ones, a trip to nature, spending time with a pet, creativity, reading, listening to music, etc.
How to develop abstraction skills
Anyone can involuntarily abstract themselves from the outside world. Even when during a lecture you think about what delicious sandwich is waiting for you at home, this is already an abstraction. But how productive is it? Most often it is associated with laziness and unwillingness to work at the moment. But you can develop this skill, direct it in a different direction and make it work for yourself.
The most important thing is the ability to abstract yourself from negative emotions. First of all, you need to try to change your view of the world: not all people are ideal, not all circumstances are favorable, mistakes cannot always be avoided. Accept that no one can be absolutely perfect. Strive to see the positive aspects and benefits for yourself in everything. Any mistakes and quarrels give us the most valuable thing: life experience. Even negative moments change you for the better if you realize it. Accept life as it is, enjoy it.
Many people have a very bad habit: even in a calm environment, a person torments himself with thoughts about the bad, about what happened a long time ago or about what could go wrong in life. It is important to realize this, because such thoughts put pressure on our psyche, they are experienced as real tragic events, depleting us. And try not to complicate existing problems. Don't blow petty problems out of proportion. We often torment ourselves with problems that, with proper awareness, are not even a problem.
To be productive in work and study, you must first find your goals and motives for these activities. Why did you come to the lecture? So that they don't give you another pass? So why not, since you have already arrived, use this time to benefit your development? If you are not interested in the topic of the lecture, try turning it into a kind of game. Listen carefully, looking for only moments that are interesting and surprising to you. Think about how this item can be useful to you in life.
If you are very irritated by loud sounds, noise or conversations on public transport, you need to maintain a positive attitude and try to concentrate your attention on something else. The awareness of your thoughts is very important. For example, you are unpleasant about a lady talking loudly on the phone at the next cash register in a store. First of all, ask yourself, why does she annoy you? Maybe you are making too much of it, only adding to your irritation? The store itself is not a very quiet place, but when you pay attention to a specific noise, it’s as if you are presenting a microphone to it, it will be stronger and louder for you than it actually is. Try to remove this mental microphone from the irritating object and concentrate on something else. For example, on what delicious dishes you can get from the products you bought. Finally, you can apply meditation techniques: breathe deeply and slowly, focus on your breathing, exhale negative thoughts.
