Loneliness.
They all really like to play at being independent and inaccessible. In fact, they are all very afraid of loneliness. For some period, anyone can easily do without a man. But, imagining that she will spend her whole life this way, the woman panics.
Every girl wants to have a strong shoulder nearby, support.
She wants to feel like a little girl whose problems are solved by a man. If she seems to be independently touching, it is only because she has not yet met a man on whom she could rely.
Of course, a girl of 20 hardly feels this fear. But as soon as her friends start getting married and giving birth, he will appear.
Forms of the disease
Regardless of the reasons that led to the occurrence of the deviation being studied, the result is always the same - the patient cannot find a common language with the opposite sex, as a result of which his life undergoes significant adverse changes.
Experts distinguish several forms of the disease, each of which is characterized by its own type of fear and individual model of behavior.
- Fear of caring. Courting lovely life partners is a whole science. They demand attention, gifts, declarations of love and actions from the male. A healthy person, if everything happens correctly, enjoys himself, giving pleasant emotions to his chosen one. This process is a kind of modern interpretation of hunting for prey. In the form of a reward - reciprocity, love, tenderness and affection. How do events unfold if no one taught a person how to care, and he himself cannot understand what needs to be done? Usually, many mistakes appear, from which, it would seem, you need to learn, but this does not happen. It is good if the patient notices the problem in a timely manner and takes the necessary measures to eliminate it. For better results, you can seek help from experienced friends or a psychotherapist - getting rid of difficulties at this stage is easier than under other possible aggravating circumstances.
- Dating anxiety. For many, just the thought of going on a date causes panic. Of course, spending time in a noisy company is much easier than being alone with a girl and making a good impression on her. Here you need to set yourself up for a confident wave, independently believing that the girl is interested in you, that you are an excellent conversationalist and an outwardly attractive man. Even if nothing worked out on previous dates, don’t despair - maybe you simply came across the wrong ladies. If the fear of being alone with a girl persists, organize a two-by-two date. Ask the girl to take a friend, take a friend yourself. Even in such a close circle it will be easier for you.
- Fear of sex. One of the most serious difficulties that can arise is fear of a woman. In some cases, this even leads to impotence. It is unnatural for a man to be afraid of sex, because by nature he is a male who is obliged to continue the race. Fears arise mainly due to personal complexes - from uncertainty about one’s appearance to doubts about the quality of the upcoming process. At the same time, men are afraid not of sex as such, but of possible failure, which will inevitably be followed by a serious blow to personal dignity and self-esteem. To combat such a complex, it is advisable to consult a psychotherapist. Additionally, if problems with potency have developed, you should go to an appointment with a urologist and/or andrologist.
React to existing problems in a timely manner, take the necessary actions to eliminate them and be healthy!
Old age.
We are the ones who become more attractive with age. We mature like wine. We gain experience.
Every girl fears the moment when her beauty begins to fade. Appearance is the first point that gives her self-confidence.
This fear can visit a girl at any age. If you start to notice something similar in yours, it’s better not to brush it off. Show attention and care. It's okay if you have to lie or flatter her.
Tell her that she will be beautiful for you at any age. That even now she looks much younger than her age.
Use humor and knock bad thoughts out of her head.
Reasons for the development of gynophobia
Deeply hidden psychological traumas that are not realized by the patient himself. In this case, research with the help of professional hypnosis will be favorable for recovery. Under hypnosis, attention is directed inward, memories emerge bright and clear. Hypnosis is used effectively as a way for patients to gain insight into themselves and their problems, to relieve anxieties and fears. In fact, the human brain in a hypnotic state guards its psyche much more carefully than in a waking state. That is, there is no need to fear that you will be “programmed.” A hypnotherapist can only raise the layer of emotions and thoughts that your subconscious is caught in the continuous repetition of (thus, for example, getting rid of the habit of smoking). There is a much greater risk of filling your head with unnecessary and dangerous information in normal conditions. Having explained to yourself the mechanism of hypnosis and having received a good specialist, you will have no reason to be afraid.
- The most common obvious reason for the development of gynophobia is the despotic severity of the mother, harsh and will-suppressing upbringing by women .
- The above reason is often accompanied (or is the root cause) by the lack of authority of a man in the family , the gentleness and lack of will of the father, and non-participation even in symbolic punishment of children. Such fathers often take on the role of a woman themselves: they catch the eye of their children only in a festive mood in order to show love and tenderness. Then, instinctively, their wives make up for the missing mental elements of the family: they take responsibility for making all decisions, punish the children, teach their husbands, which is completely unusual for women’s nature. This is how destructive images can develop and be transferred to all female representatives. In view of this, the example of a respected father is very important for the formation of a truly masculine way of interacting with women.
- The reason for the development of gynophobia is conflicting sexual attitudes . That is, on the one hand, the attraction and interest to communicate, and on the other, an unsuccessful experience in relationships with women or the memory of an unpleasant situation associated with them. For example, gynecophobia is especially pronounced in relation to pregnant women, with whom a man may see sexual relations as unnatural and harmful. Misunderstanding of the reasons for what is happening develops into disgust and disgust towards women, especially pregnant women.
Other reasons
Women sometimes suffer from gynecophobia. When neglected, this obsessive state can develop into anger and misogyny. However, at the first stage of gynophobia, fear of women can manifest itself selectively and to a small extent. For example, the fear of young people to meet girls is expressed in strong excitement and even panic attacks when trying to talk to a stranger they like. Representatives of the stronger sex have a lot of strength and determination to make acquaintances, so they step over their fears and move on. A gynophobe will try to avoid the company of women and a specific person he likes. Defiantly rude male speech often remains the only available way for a gynophobe to communicate with women. If a man (with a heterosexual orientation) experiences fear even at the thought of intimate relationships with women, or panic attacks alone with a regular girlfriend for the same reason, then this may be a sign of gynecophobia.
Over time, the fear of women becomes very painful and will complicate a person’s life in society. Gynophobia in some cases can be considered as one of the manifestations of anchoretism (Greek: anachoretes). Hermitage can take place in society, but only for reasonable reasons, to which fear has nothing to do with it. Immunization by the body of itself is unacceptable for healthy people. Isolation from the outside world and constant desire for deserted places does not simplify the situation and will cause depressive moods.
Unplanned pregnancy.
Many girls, just like men, are afraid of getting pregnant.
Her career was just starting to take off. She goes to the gym and watches her figure. Travel is planned for six months in advance. And then there's the child!
Or, on the contrary, she has not yet managed to achieve anything. There is no apartment, there is barely enough money to live on. This can cause a panic attack for a girl just as much as it does for you.
Show her that children are not part of your plans yet. Use contraceptives. Make it clear that if she gets pregnant, you will be with her and help her with everything. That everything will be fine.
What exactly scares you most often?
A guy may be afraid to even approach a girl
- “I’m afraid to approach a girl.” It is important to realize that the presence of this fear will not allow you to create a relationship. The guy must fight his phobia; the young lady is unlikely to take the first step.
- "I'm afraid to speak." More often, such fear arises among shy guys who do not have sufficient experience in communicating with girls. To make it easier to cope with fear, you need to become more versatile or find out in advance the topics that interest a certain young lady, study, prepare for a conversation and start communicating.
- “What will others think?” It's time to understand that the people around you are busy with their thoughts, their problems and worries.
- "Fear of being rejected." The young man must realize that the girl has the right not to reciprocate. Those we like don’t always reciprocate. Naturally, a girl may refuse to communicate, especially if she herself is afraid of men. The guy should take this easier and remember that a negative answer is better than no answer at all. Moreover, there is a percentage chance that the girl will still show mutual interest.
Fear of getting fat.
Just remember how many times she asked if she had gained weight, if her dress was making her look fat? And the fact that she couldn't fit into the jeans she wore in 10th grade could be a disaster.
There are two ways out of the situation.
If your girl is slim, beat the crap out of her head. Boost your self-esteem. Give compliments and often tell her what a wonderful figure she has. Go into detail, it will help.
If she really has gained weight, don’t even think about telling her about it. You will hurt and offend her, you will completely kill her self-confidence. Lead by example. Start running and switch to a healthy diet. Inspire her and call her with you, support her in everything.
How to overcome fear
You can start communicating with girls based on common interests, without focusing on the fact that they are representatives of a different gender
- Fear always arises before something unknown and new. This is a completely normal reaction of the human body. All people at some point in their lives have encountered some kind of fear, for example, the fear of donating blood from a finger prick. However, under the compulsion of their parents, they went and did it. Over time, fear was no longer felt so acutely.
- Work on improving your appearance. This will help improve your self-esteem. Particular attention should be paid to cleanliness and neatness, and the correct choice of clothing.
- Broaden your horizons. For this purpose, you can watch quality films or read fiction. This will make it much easier for you to start a conversation with a beautiful person.
- Learn to joke, show your sense of humor. This will help defuse a frightening situation.
- Workout. Having improved your body, you will not be afraid to talk to a girl with a model appearance.
- Experts often advise looking your fears in the eye. A man can try to go ahead, and it will be a big challenge for himself to approach a girl who has a model appearance. And it doesn’t matter that at this moment your legs will tremble, your heart will jump out of your chest. You can even start a conversation with her by saying how scary it was to approach such an unearthly beauty. This way you will be able to realize that your fear was not seriously justified. All guys go through this. There's nothing wrong with talking to a girl; she won't bite.
Self confidence
Auto-training has a great influence on increasing self-esteem
If the phrase “I’m afraid of beautiful girls” is very familiar to you, then the best way to overcome this phobia will be to work on yourself and increase your self-esteem.
- Take up auto training. Every day in front of the mirror, tell yourself that you are the smartest, most beautiful and attractive.
- Appearance. It is important to make sure that your hair is well-groomed, your nails are cut, your face is clean, your hair is washed, that is, the guy must be well-groomed and have a pleasant aroma coming from him.
- Special attention should be paid to the choice of clothes and shoes. The beautiful half of humanity will pay attention to a well-chosen image, and the guy’s self-esteem will significantly increase.
- Start visiting the gym regularly and playing sports. Over time, you will see how your body changes for the better. This will definitely give you more confidence.
First sex.
No, I'm not talking about virgins now. Everything is clear with them. I'm talking about the fear of first sex with a new partner. It's a real phobia of screwing up in bed.
No girl wants to have the reputation of being a "log." Give her a compliment and tell her that you haven't felt this good in a long time. Understand that her self-esteem may be hurt here, even if you are number forty on the list of lovers.
Note the winning points of her figure. She may think that her breasts are too small and her hips are too big. Or vice versa. Don't strengthen her complexes, but dispel them. And see what the second time will be like.
Look stupid.
Or get into a situation in which she will look funny. Such a girl is insecure and complex. Her life is a struggle with fears.
Any girl wants to carry herself proudly, to be feminine and mysterious. It is also important for them to keep up with men intellectually. If she doesn’t understand the topic at hand, she may feel stupid and narrow-minded.
No need to laugh if at some point she looks ridiculous. If she doesn't know something, tell her about it in an accessible way. Your task is to make the girl feel comfortable and relaxed with you.
Loss of attractiveness.
Girls are so concerned about their beauty that they spare neither money nor time on self-care procedures.
Manicure, pedicure, haircut, coloring, massages, cosmetologist, gym - this is only a small part of what a girl does to herself every month.
And all because they are very afraid of becoming ugly.
Don’t look at others in front of her, don’t judge the appearance of your friends. Convince her that for you she is the most attractive and desirable. Support her desire to take care of herself.
