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Do you have a busy work schedule? Have you long forgotten what it means to feel cheerful and rested? Do you constantly feel general weakness, drowsiness and apathy? Be careful, all these symptoms portend chronic fatigue syndrome
, which has long ceased to be just a spectacular expression and has turned into a diagnosis for an entire generation.
But it is not at all necessary to push yourself to extremes when only a doctor can help you; you just need to know how to relieve stress
and be able to rest properly.
Move
A simple brisk walk, a bike ride, or a single aerobic activity can relieve psychological stress by releasing endorphins and other feel-good neurotransmitters.
Here are my recommendations for anti-stress exercises. Start with 20-minute walks four times a week (three on weekdays and once on Saturday or Sunday). Walking is a fairly low-intensity exercise, and even if you feel depressed, you are unlikely to feel like you don't have enough strength to do it. Plus, you can easily fit the walk into your schedule.
It's best if you can take a walk in a park or among trees to get some vitamin D from the sun and the therapeutic benefits of time spent in nature. I recommend walking in the morning if possible, as research shows that people skip exercise in the morning significantly less than exercise scheduled for later in the day.
Parent Resources
There are external resources, and there are internal ones.
External means connecting other people. Internal ones are those resources for which you don’t need anyone, you implement them yourself (and if not, a psychologist will help). External:
- Organization of assistance. For example, nannies or babysitters.
- Organization of regular productive communication, energy exchange with the world. This is especially necessary for extroverted women.
- Development of marital relationships.
- Group physical activity. Going to a fitness club, communicating with a group of active people with whom there is positive communication.
- Group creative activity - dancing, courses, etc.
- Organized parent education. A group, perhaps even in an online format, in which you learn parenting.
Internal:
- Overcoming self-evaluative attitudes. If we are very critical, it takes away our resource.
- Overcoming anxiety and guilt.
- Overcoming a utilitarian attitude towards oneself. Sometimes parents perceive their functions as an inanimate instrument: “I am a saucepan - I must cook!”
- Increasing parental competence. A very powerful parent resource. Read books on pedagogy and improve your parenting skills - this will help you reach a qualitatively different level of parenting.
- Improving the organization of work, sleep and rest. Proper planning of the day to restore the resource.
- Working with your own childhood psychological traumas. Here, too, communication with a psychologist will most likely help.
It is important not to feel enslaved by your child. Otherwise, parenting becomes a lot like going to college that you didn't really want to go to. You can always find something that interests you in parenting!
Make a list of what not to do
When your to-do list is too long, it's a sure sign that you'll never get to the bottom of it, and that's what's causing you stress. So it's time to start doing less.
The best ways are to learn to say “no” to unimportant requests, delegate your responsibilities to other family members or seek outside help, and set boundaries in your relationships with others.
The reality is that your time, energy and attention are enough for a certain number of different tasks and responsibilities. Select the ones that are necessary, meaningful, or useful and make them a priority. Figure out what needs to be done today, what can wait until tomorrow, and what can be put off until later. Time management techniques like these can help you maintain your sanity and reduce stress. At the same time, learn to say no to less attractive opportunities or tasks and cross them off your imaginary to-do list.
Stages of emotional burnout in parenting
SEB (emotional burnout syndrome) is preceded by increased parental activity, preoccupation with the child (children), rejection of other needs and lack of concern about meeting one’s own needs.
Most often, of course, women tend to plunge into such states. But if a man plays a role close to that of a mother in the family, then such a predisposition is also characteristic of him. This, by the way, is very similar to emotional burnout in professional terms - the syndromes are the same.
CMEA stages
Emotional exhaustion: feeling overextended and depleted of resources
There is a feeling that it is impossible to relax, there is no strength. But at this stage, a person is still able to help himself, realizing the complexity of the situation. Perhaps you should start delegating some tasks to loved ones, give up some responsibilities, look at your daily worries differently and start devoting time to yourself.
Dehumanization - decreased interest in parental tasks, emotional detachment from the child
Humane treatment and consideration of the child’s emotional needs begin to decline. It is important to understand that these are not one-time episodes, but something that happens day after day over a long period of time. At this stage, it is difficult for people to cope on their own; here, as a rule, it is no longer possible to do without the help of a psychologist.
“Bad parent” syndrome – loss of self-esteem
Lack of satisfaction from parenting. This stage includes the previous two. In this state, the parent is ready to throw off responsibility for the child and let everything take its course. At this stage, past successes and achievements no longer warm the soul.
Have regular time-outs
When you start to feel tension building in your body or mind, take a short break to hit the reset button. Find a quiet place at work or at home where you can be alone and engage in three to five minutes of calming exercises - deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, visualizing a calm picture, listening to calming melodies, inhaling calming scents (such as lavender or vanilla). ). I hope that after this break you will feel refreshed and ready to focus on your business with renewed vigor.
Trust the experts
Thousand-year-old methods of stress management include acupuncture and cupping (an ancient technique that uses cupping to mobilize blood flow and activate the healing process by suctioning cups to the skin). These methods are most often used to relieve stress-related symptoms such as headaches, high blood pressure, sleep disturbances, or chronic pain, but they can also help calm the mind.
Change your thinking
When I was struggling with my own fatigue, I spent some time researching stress reduction techniques and found that one of the most proven approaches was cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). The philosophy behind CBT is that it is not the events in our lives that create stress, but rather how we perceive them is what triggers the stress response in our body. Therefore, the goal of therapy is to identify and change the way we think and respond to complex stressful situations, and not to try to get rid of the stress itself. Learning to change your thinking takes practice, practice, and more practice—which is why you might benefit from working with a therapist who specializes in CBT (cognitive therapist).
At the same time, try to form the habit of giving your thoughts a new “look”. Because when you're under pressure or faced with a scary problem, it's easy to slip into negative thinking.
Variants of negative thinking:
- catastrophizing (when you imagine the worst possible outcome);
- the “all or nothing” principle (you see everything in black and white);
- hasty conclusions (you are sure that you know something, although your guesses may be very far from the truth);
- overgeneralization (when a negative situation seems like a link in an endless chain of stressful events or bad luck).
To counter such thoughts, try the following techniques:
- Ask yourself how likely it is that your worst fears will actually come true.
- Consider whether this situation will be relevant in three months or three years.
- Forget words like “always” and “never”; use less categorical expressions to describe the situations in which you find yourself.
- Ask yourself whether there is evidence that this negative situation is part of a single chain and is truly dangerous.
Simple ways to relieve stress, emotional tension and fatigue that are accessible to everyone
Hello, dear readers!
I bring to your attention several ways to quickly relieve stress, physical fatigue and emotional tension.
The concept of “stress” has thoroughly entered and become entrenched in modern life. Whatever it is, good or bad, physical or psycho-emotional, its impact on the body does not pass without leaving a trace. Unfortunately, in schools, colleges, and institutes, no one teaches us how to recognize stress, as well as how to cope and deal with it. The trouble lies not in stress itself, but in its incorrect understanding, the inability to correctly assess its depth, causes and methods of relief. So, you have to do everything yourself.
“The rescue of drowning people is the work of the drowning people themselves!”
I offer several simple, useful ways to cope with stress and its consequences. You don't have to do everything at once. To relax and restore your normal state, it is enough to do at least one of them. Which one? The choice is yours! It all depends on the capabilities, condition and environment.
So, ways to relieve stress, emotional tension and fatigue.
1.
Shift your attention to your breathing. Take several deep breaths in and out while breathing through your belly. It is better to inhale and exhale through the nose, unless it is clogged, of course. You will feel your body relax. Gradually, the tension will decrease, and it will be easier for you to manage yourself and the situation.
2.
Stretch, massage the muscles of the back of your neck and upper back, straighten your chest to make it easier to breathe, move around. All this leads to general relaxation, which means that there must be a tendency towards liberation from tension and negative emotions in general.
3.
Clench your fists tightly, then tense your entire body as much as you can. Then, exhale sharply and relax your entire body. Do the exercise several times. This will help relieve muscle spasms.
Comment: Increased muscle tension is considered a major sign of stress. Very often, during a stressful situation, this is manifested by a feeling of tension in the muscles of the neck, forehead and jaws, clenched teeth, tightly clenched fingers and toes, tension in the facial muscles, a frowning face, sudden jerky movements, motor hyperactivity, and rapid blinking. That's why it's so important to learn how to relax your muscles! A good effect is obtained if you sharply tense your body, then suddenly relax.
4.
If possible, walk briskly. Better on the street, or in nature. Slow down gradually. Take to a slow, meditative walk, noticing everything around you. Look at the world as if you are not looking at it for the first time. Try to turn off your internal dialogue. Allow 10–15 minutes for this. Even better, half an hour or more until it passes. Notice that when you return to a stressful situation, you will look at it much calmer.
5.
Will slow down. Slow down in everything: in movements, in thoughts, in breathing. Act as if you were in slow motion. Try to merge with the space here and now. Don’t think about what will happen in an hour, a day, a week, a month, a year. Namely, to enjoy the “Now” moment. Turn off the internal dialogue, enjoy the “silence” in your head. At this time, true relaxation of all muscles and emotional relief comes.
6.
Listen to music! This helps you relax and reduce emotional stress. Listen to calm, meditative music, preferably without words. Focus on her. Close your eyes and completely surrender to the sounds that fill your sound world. It’s good to listen to relaxation CDs with the sound of the sea, birdsong, and so on.
7.
Trance states. No! We won’t dance with a shaman’s tambourine, ground mushrooms and rabbit’s feet. This is a completely different story. Here, trance is considered as one of the natural states of the body, somewhere between wakefulness and sleep, a state of pleasant drowsiness, which, for example, is usually observed after a hearty lunch.
Intentionally entering a trance is a form of self-hypnosis. A person can also enter a trance under the influence of fatigue or information overload. This is how the body naturally protects itself from stress. When their number and strength become excessive, a person strives to fall asleep and thereby eliminate the effects of stress in his nervous system.
You can learn how to enter a trance correctly at Pavel Kolesov’s trainings. Just 20-30 minutes a day and fatigue will go away, in addition, in a state of trance you can be healed of many diseases. I myself use the practices of this training. I recommend to all!
You need to rest before you get tired!!!
8.
Water procedures. The simplest thing you can do when you feel stressed or irritated is to wash your face with cold water. If possible and hardened, douse yourself with cold water or take a shower. It is also good to swim in open water.
The opposite of cold water is taking a warm bath. Warm water relaxes the muscles of the body and improves blood flow. The most optimal temperature for relaxing the human body is 37 degrees. If after taking a bath you plan to do some business or go to work, a restaurant or a party, then do not increase the temperature. Well, if you take a bath before bed to relieve daytime stress, fall asleep and see colorful dreams, you can make the water hotter and add a few drops of aromatic oil to it.
9.
Have an aromatherapy session. Aromatherapy is based on the use of essential oils, such as cedar, cypress, sage, lemon balm, jasmine, orange and others. A prerequisite: the oil must be pleasant for humans and not cause irritation or allergies.
To carry out home aromatherapy you need: natural essential oils, an aroma lamp and special candles, which can be bought at a pharmacy or in special stores.
Aromatherapy goes very well with homeopathy, herbal medicine and massage. In addition, some oils (for example, cloves, juniper) are excellent mosquito repellents.
10.
The use of herbal medicine will help relieve tension, in particular infusions of herbs such as valerian officinalis, wild strawberry, mint, lemon balm, motherwort, hawthorn, lily of the valley and other soothing herbs. You can use ready-made herbal mixtures that are sold in pharmacies.
11.
Do not forget about self-hypnosis that everything that is done is for the better. If something doesn’t work out and there is no way to change it, then you need to accept the situation with dignity; If something can be corrected, then don’t be upset, but think about a further plan of action.
Dale Carnegie wrote: “Live in the compartment of today,” that is, you need to live for today, enjoy it and not worry about distant events that may not yet happen. At the same time, you should try to forget past failures and mistakes, and not reproach yourself all your life for the mistakes you made. “Don’t cut sawdust!” - the same Carnegie implored. Remember that many people may have it much worse than you right now. Take care of your nerves and smile more, try to communicate less or not at all with unpleasant people. Worry less about what other people think of you, plan your life as you see fit. Worry less about trifles!
And with this I say goodbye to you! See you on the blog pages! Take care of your nerves - they are iron: they can rust!
PS Dear readers, if you know your own methods or techniques for getting rid of the effects of stress and fatigue, then tell us about them in the comments. I and other readers will be grateful. Thank you!
Think about what you can influence
When under stress and feeling powerless, people easily and naturally focus on the negative aspects of events in their lives that are beyond their control. But it would be better to concentrate on what you can control. This technique is called a cognitive somersault. Ask yourself what specific steps—big or small—need to be taken to improve a given situation or influence the outcome.
Ultimately, the best approach to reducing stress and replenishing your energy is to build your own personal toolbox of tools, methods, and techniques that work for you. For me, this means making sure to exercise (yoga or walking) five days a week, which relieves shoulder pain and fatigue. When the pressure is too much (and this happens often!), I make a concerted effort to stay in the present: I try not to play the “what if?” game. Instead, I try to think just one day ahead, even just part of the day, to better adapt to circumstances.
How to deal with emotional fatigue
Give yourself the right to relax
The most important thing you can do to avoid emotional fatigue is to achieve peace of mind. No matter what you have to do, you should have half an hour so you can enjoy what makes you happy.
On the other hand, if you have problems with concentration, you can try to practice self-discipline, meditation techniques. Thanks to this, you will be able to increase your ability to control your mind and manage your emotions.
Avoid overstimulation
We live in a world of “overstimulation.” Our minds are constantly receiving large amounts of sensory information. Therefore, it is almost impossible to stay focused and adapt to this rhythm, which involves continuous jumps from one stimulus to another.
If you want to combat emotional fatigue, make sure that your surroundings do not control your attention. If you're working, turn off all notifications on your phone and try not to distract your colleagues.