Work can wait
25-year-old New York publicist Sarah Solomon and 29-year-old sales manager Tim Mason from New Jersey met at a surf hostel in Nicaragua. Before that, both left more than cushy jobs, feeling at a dead end in life.
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Photo: depositphotos/stokkete
“Everything was fine with work: great company, good money. But I thought, “Why spend your best years in an office? People retire at 67, and this age continues to rise. Who knows what time I will be able to leave - maybe 70? I thought it would be stupid not to leave. I was the top seller for three years and did like Michael Jordan - I ended up at the peak of success,” says Tim.
Dynamic and ambitious
Sociologist Alexander Shatilov - about the generation of graduates 2018
In three years he traveled to 30 countries. He makes a living by teaching scuba diving to those interested. Naturally, earnings are much more modest than before, but freedom is more valuable to Tim.
The American’s friend, Sarah, thinks in much the same way. The only difference is that the girl managed to stay in the profession. True, now she no longer attends social events in the Big Apple, but sits with a laptop in the tropics. The income has suffered greatly, but the girl is happy.
“I wanted to travel more and didn’t want to beg for every extra day off,” Solomon explains. The employer could give her only two weeks of vacation a year, but now she decides for herself how much rest she wants. In the 10 months after her dismissal, Sarah lived in Hawaii, visited the volcanoes of Guatemala, and swam in waterfalls in Bali. Naturally, you have to save money.
Posted by Sarah Solomon (@wanderingpublicist) Jul 1, 2020 at 3:23 am PDT
Tim says he is thinking about children, but for now this issue is not a priority for him.
The most active generation of Russian graduates has been named
Parenting. Infantilism or unwillingness to grow up.
The fact is that some children mature more slowly than their peers.
This does not mean their physical height and shoe size, but the fact that their mental qualities are formed late. The term “infantilism” is used by psychologists to denote the immaturity of a person, especially emotional-volitional qualities. This can be caused by heredity, intrauterine pathologies and injuries, childhood infections, insufficient thyroid function, and changes in the pituitary gland.
Doctors and psychologists have not yet fully decided on this. But still, most often the causes of infantilism are a combination of these factors with incorrect parental efforts. This overprotection is one of the common mistakes in parenting, when parents direct the child’s every step.
And then, along with infantilism, egocentrism, inability to take into account others, extreme lack of independence, passivity, and inability to exert tension become very noticeable. Despotic upbringing with physical punishment and constant prohibitions also contributes to a decrease in initiative, the manifestation of lack of independence, and indecisiveness.
However, it is worth noting that mental infantilism has nothing to do with mental retardation, as many people often mistakenly think. Infantile children are no different from others in terms of developing skills and abilities.
Emotionality or inadequacy? Infantile children differ from their peers in their naivety and carelessness; their desire for play and pleasure prevails over all their interests. They often prefer the company of younger children or, on the contrary, adults who patronize them.
They try to capture their attention as much as possible: show them the toys they brought, boast about things, complain about conflicts with peers. Often they are not capable of volitional efforts, do not take into account the consequences of their own actions, and do not know how to restrain their feelings.
Their mood often changes: from violent manifestations of joy and delight they easily move to tears, sobs and despair and back. Here's another practical example.
During the break, the teacher saw eight-year-old Yura crying bitterly and brought him into class, trying to understand the reason for the tears and console him. It turns out that the older boys called him “Postman Pechkin” because of the bag that Yura carries over his shoulder. Complaining about the offenders, Yura suddenly smiled, his face suddenly lit up - he remembered some girl who once called him Yuri Gagarin. The boy immediately laughed, wiping his wet eyelashes.
Such rapid emotional switching, expressive facial expressions and impressionability captivate and touch adults. And often, behind such childishness, they do not notice the obvious superficiality of feelings, the generally inadequate reaction and emotional incontinence of the child.
This example is not as harmless as it seems at first glance. Firstly, such behavior of a child in kindergarten or school violates the rules of behavior in a team, which may well lead to the fact that such a child will become the subject of ridicule and bullying from peers. Secondly, it greatly complicates the work of educators and teachers who are forced to pay full attention to such an infantile child, while other children are left unattended.
Parents, kindergarten teachers and teachers are confused by spontaneity, inappropriate behavior for age and children’s inability to adapt to reality. The lack of ideas about what is possible and what is not gives rise to a manner of free and even unceremonious relations with adults.
Another example from school life confirms this. Nine-year-old Natasha approached her classmate’s mother and, while she was talking with the teacher, opened the woman’s bag and began to lay out the contents with interest, looking at it. When my mother finally turned around, she was amazed to find her phone, keys, cosmetics and documents laid out on her school desk.
Of course, although this situation goes beyond basic decency, it can again touch someone with its childish spontaneity. However, more dangerous variants of such gullibility of infantile children in relation to unfamiliar adults are also quite likely: a child is able to approach anyone on the street and start a conversation, follow a stranger who can use this childish openness for his own purposes, which are not always noble. So infantilism in certain cases is fraught with serious consequences.
Restlessness or learning disability?
Infantile children most often do poorly, but not due to a lack of ability. The main difficulty that a teacher or educator faces is the inability of an infantile child to join in the overall work: he does not even try to do it, he randomly asks questions that are not related to the matter.
Moreover, this behavior is often combined with the child’s sincere desire to live up to his own ideas about a “good student.” He tries to sit up straight, raises his hand as high as possible, and jumps up joyfully when asked.
But after a fairly short time, immediate desires overpower, and the child interrupts the teacher, talks with a neighbor, and walks around the class. Such children are prone to foolishness and clownery; at school they are characterized by restlessness, disinhibition, and inability to behave in class.
Let's try to understand why this happens. For an infantile child, the very situation of communication with an adult or peer is more important, and any task is significant only insofar as it is woven into this communication situation. For example, he stretches out his hand with all his might, asking to be asked.
Dear Freedom
According to a Deloitte study on millennials' attitudes towards the corporate world, 43% of respondents plan to leave the office within the next two years. Many people don’t know what they will do after this.
Leaving a prestigious job in order to live a more interesting and free life is a beautiful gesture, and there is a certain logic in discussions about the illusory nature of a pension. But it is obvious that not every opponent of the “9 to 6” schedule is able to organize an income outside the office - for now, such a case is rather a happy exception. But this doesn't bother millennials. Some representatives of the generation are ready to go nowhere, having neither savings nor plans on how to replenish their wallets without the help of a permanent employer.
Posted by Gracie Halpern (@graciehalpern) May 10, 2020 at 6:47 am PDT
In the photo: 31-year-old copywriter Gracie Halpern quit her six-figure annual income at an agency
#VanLife: How Millennials Turned Minivan Riding into a Cult
Where did bohemia on wheels come from?
American Gracie was so dissatisfied with her monotonous existence that she woke up at night from panic attacks and the thought: “This is not my life.” She spent a significant part of her salary on psychotherapy. By exchanging New York for Bali, she got rid of this expense item, but her income also fell sharply.
After traveling, Gracie returned to her parents in North Carolina and now continues to work as a freelancer. Travels around the country when finances allow. But he doesn’t want to go to the office.
Path as priority
Freedom of movement and travel are not just important, but of great importance for millennials around the world. This was shown by a global survey conducted by marketers from GfK and the accommodation booking service Airbnb.
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Photo: depositphotos/lightpoet
For 70% of the generation, travel is part of their identity. For these millennials, exciting trips are a top priority, ahead of the need to save for their own home, car, or even pay interest on a loan.
"Young people live in a virtual world"
The head of the Mosfilm film concern Karen Shakhnazarov talks about the analogue of the Soviet Goskino, the quality of modern films and the problems of the new generation
They say that this generation doesn't know how to save money? He even knows how to do it - if we are talking about a trip to the country of dreams. A Merrill Edge report found that millennials save 36% more than other generations. But the main goals are “frivolous”: tourism, restaurants and fitness.
Where do they teach to become an adult?
Perhaps millennials' attitude toward routine is a consequence of their unconventional view of generally accepted social obligations and the world order. Sociologists believe that this generation is characterized by nonconformism and global thinking, not least due to the fact that the generation came of age during the digital boom.
But millennials, on top of everything else, have become known as infantile: it’s not for nothing that sociologists call them the Peter Pan generation. Perhaps the dislike of obligation is a consequence of the fact that young contemporaries do not feel like adults. Why, for example, do many millennials not build a career “as it should be,” and if they do, they feel unhappy?
The author of the book The Vanishing American Adult, Ben Sass, believes that the sins of millennials can be blamed on... their parents. Generation X and the baby boomer generation overprotected their children, protecting them from any difficulties in life, the expert believes. It turned out that, faced with such problems, millennials decided: they should not fight difficulties, but run away from them.
Posted by NISU ~ Genis M. (@nisuuuuu) Jul 27, 2020 at 8:20 am PDT
Follow the hype
What social trends had a huge impact on people in 2017?
In 2020, psychologist Rachel Weinstein and teacher Katie Brunell opened a unique institution in Portland, Maine - a growing-up school. Weinstein noted that millennials do not understand how to be “big.” The feeling of one's own adulthood, according to Rachel, consists of many small knowledge and skills. Without them, it is quite natural to feel like a child even at 30 years old.
At the school of growing up, they teach the basics of adult life. First, you need to fill out a questionnaire by answering “yes” or “no” to simple statement questions. For example: “I know how much money I have and where it is”, “I know how to cook according to recipes”, “I understand when and what form of communication to use - for example, I will not break up with my partner by writing to him about it in the messenger "
In classes, millennials are taught home economics (for example, how to hang a picture), and how to take care of their health and their own vehicle (“Do you know how to check the oil level?”). One class costs $19.99, and the training is not too strenuous (presumably to keep a skittish audience from running away).
Men are afraid to grow up
There is an opinion that only women are afraid of age. They say youth and beauty are their main strength.
They are so afraid of losing it that cosmetic companies make huge money from this phobia, producing anti-aging creams, scrubs and masks, which, according to advertising, enable any woman to “look 10 years younger.” Such advertising really scared me as a child, I immediately imagined how a 17-year-old girl applied this cream to her face and immediately turned into a first-grader girl. So much for being “10 years younger”!
Indeed, men use anti-aging cosmetics much less often than women. But this does not mean that they are not affected by age-related problems. It’s just that their pain point is not their appearance, but their social status.
It's no secret that many men only become more impressive over the years. Take Hollywood, where many middle-aged men, ranging from Johnny Depp (43 years old) to Clint Eastwood (76 years old), are still stars. The same cannot be said about older actresses.
But men are extremely nervous about the loss of social status due to growing up. The same retirement is very scary for them. But even worse are age-related problems in communicating with women. We are not just talking about impotence, although this scourge is, of course, worse than all pensions combined. However, psychological problems associated with changing age are also very painful.
Have you ever wondered why “gray hair in a beard means a devil in a rib”? It’s only men who have this kind of bullshit; women with their first gray hair don’t start chasing young students. It's all about the fear of losing your male status, the need to prove to others and to yourself that you are still wow!
Why am I explaining all this? The fact is that the topic of age is of great concern to me now. I don’t have any gray hair, I’m still far from retirement, and I don’t need Viagra yet. And yet, recently I realized that I had somehow imperceptibly crossed one of the age barriers - my youth was left behind. And it turned out that this really upset me.
It happened like this. Friends invited me to drink cocktails on Friday evening in a famous bar near Pushkinskaya Square. I’ve never been there, and in my life I’ve only tried Screwdriver and Bloody Mary, which I thought was a “woman’s drink” for those who don’t have the courage to drink normal vodka. It turns out that civilized cocktail drinking is an extremely fun activity. Especially if you order some special cocktail, where the bartender takes a long time to set something on fire, pour it from glass to glass, and then urgently demands that you inhale the alcoholic vapors and drink the contents in one gulp. At the same time, the bar staff rings the bell, and your friends slam their hands on the table to cheer you up. Quite fun, really.
We had already drunk a lot of cocktails and were having a great time when the doors of the bar opened and three extremely young girls in orange tops and short skirts ran in. Following them was some guy, also in an orange outfit: in one hand he was holding a swearing box, and in the other, a large flashing light, like on an ambulance.
Before we knew it, half-naked girls were already dancing on the tables and the bar, and the guy was standing next to them and fiercely chanting through a foul mouth: “Jägermeister! Jägermeister!” It turned out that this was an advertising campaign to promote the liqueur of the same name. And the girls who danced on the tables were called “jaegerettes.”
It soon became clear that everyone who orders this Jägermeister will be awarded low-value prizes with the symbols of the product. And those who are greedy are simply treated to a freebie as part of a tasting, so to speak. I honestly drank a few frozen tubes of this liqueur (it's served chilled) and ended up with a stupid orange bandana that one of the rangers tied around me as a neckerchief. While she was tying it, the guy from the swearing magazine snapped a Polaroid at me and, with a pleased look, handed me a photograph in . The last time I looked so stupid in a photograph was when I was accepted into the Pioneers and some party bureaucrat tied a tie for me in the Museum. Lenin.
At this time, the rest of the Jägerettes continued to dance on the tables and arrange, as the advertising leaflets said, “trademark fun in the style of Jägermeister.” However, the audience in the hall, having eaten cocktails, somehow did not really want to jump and dance. Then one of the huntsmen jumped up to me and began to show with gestures that she really wanted me to start dancing too. At that time, I had already drunk enough and decided to show that I was young in spirit and body. I got up from the table and immediately ran into a problem. It seems that the huntress intended to dance a couple dance with me, but when I looked at her thin waist and touching girlish navel, I somehow immediately felt like a pedophile. I don’t know how old she was, but she looked like a high school student at a school celebration in honor of Women’s Solidarity Day. I hugged her somehow chastely, but then immediately removed my hands. I felt embarrassed.
The huntswoman was also slightly embarrassed, but continued to dance, and I began to make some dance moves next to her. Now I understand that from the outside it should have looked rather stupid, but I was drunk and tried to help the girls have fun. The guy from the advertising group appreciated my efforts and suggested that I shout into the foul-mouthed box: “E-ger-may-ster!” It was even stupider, but I honestly shouted. Consoling myself with the fact that I am cheerful, active and young, not like the other visitors.
When the promotional event was coming to an end, the huntress who was trying to dance with me began to make some strange gestures, apparently trying to call me over. I obediently danced up to her, then she stood on tiptoes to reach my ear and shouted over the roar of cheerful music: “You dance well!”
And it was like a tub of ice water in the middle of a Brazilian carnival. I immediately lost the desire for cocktails, dancing, and fun. I felt so sad that I wanted to drink a glass of vodka, wash my feet and go to bed. Because if the huntsmen with whom you dance at night in a bar address you as you, then your youth has passed completely and irrevocably.
