Communication environment and etiquette formulas. You - and you - communication
Home Favorites Random article Educational New additions Feedback FAQ⇐ PreviousPage 18 of 24Next ⇒
In an official setting of business communication, it is customary to choose universal etiquette formulas:
| Greetings | Good afternoon (morning, evening)! Hello! |
| Parting | Goodbye! All the best! Best wishes! See you! (if you have an appointment) Let me say goodbye! Bon voyage (departure) |
| Gratitude | Thank you! Very grateful to you! Thank you Thank you very much! Thank you (grateful) from the bottom of my heart! Let me thank you! |
| Request | Be kind... Be kind... I ask you... |
| Apology | I apologize... Please forgive me... Please forgive me... Please forgive me... |
| Offer | Let me suggest... I would like to offer you... I would like to offer you... |
| Invitation | Let me invite you to... I invite you to... On behalf of... I invite you to... |
Etiquette emphasizes the distance of official communication. This is due to the choice of You-referral. Regardless of the social status, gender and age of the interlocutor, the You address is chosen, which involves not only addressing the interlocutor by name and patronymic, but also determines the choice of topic of discussion, communication distance, tone, and lexical selection. An official setting requires two-way communication in any social and age group.
Russian society has adopted a three-name system for naming people: last name, first name, patronymic. This applies not only to appeals, but also to mentions in official settings. A full address can only be combined with an address to you.
One of the most important functions of etiquette is the removal of aggression. It is realized in the correct choice of tone of communication, primarily in the absence of categorical assessments. It must be remembered that the more polite the speaker, the less categorical his statements.
Call system
Any address with which we designate the addressee of speech is an index address: driver, doctor, conductor, professor, etc. Such addresses are widely used in business speech. If it is necessary to address a person by rank, position, or occupation, we use indexical addresses in everyday speech:
- Doctor, please write out a prescription!
— Driver, stop the car at the intersection, please!
— Dear customers! For your convenience, our store has a luggage storage facility.
Clients, advertisers, partners, co-founders, etc. – all these words are used as index addresses in various genres of business speech: Dear clients of our bank! We inform you about the annual payment of dividends to shareholders and the payment of interest on deposits from January 13, 2005.
Things are more complicated with commonly used addresses. Today is the official address gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen
experiencing a rebirth.
It is increasingly included in business communication. When using it you need to remember the following. Firstly, in the singular form, the address “master” is not used independently, but only with a surname, title or position: Mr. Onuchin, Mr. Governor, Mr. Chairman, Mr. Professor.
Secondly, the address “Mr.” or “ladies and gentlemen” is an address from an equal to an equal. Sometimes it is combined with indexical addresses, provided that the audience is homogeneous: gentlemen bankers, gentlemen entrepreneurs. Thirdly, since the address still retains both the old lexical meaning and the socio-political pre-revolutionary connotation (“master of his position”), it should not be used in relation to to the poor, unemployed and other socially vulnerable segments of the population.
Today there are attempts to develop new official messages that unite representatives of all parties and classes: fellow citizens, compatriots, Russians.
They are only used in the plural form when addressing the public.
But if you need to contact a person in a queue, on a bus, or in a workshop, difficulties often arise. Calls “man - woman” are completely unacceptable. The use of such addresses is a trait of uncultured people. If it is difficult to choose an address, you can use descriptive, indirect addresses: excuse me, would it be difficult for you..., excuse me..., be so kind...
Getting to know each other. Recommendations
An acquaintance situation is a situation so common in business communication that verbal communication, as a rule, becomes automatic. Acquaintance can be carried out without an intermediary and with the help of an intermediary, when someone else introduces people. If the acquaintance is carried out without an intermediary, the initiator of the acquaintance in the first remark is the organization that he represents and the goals pursued by establishing this contact. It is better if in this case the person introducing himself begins his remark with an apology.
A. - Excuse me, I would like to meet you! . We would like to invite you to our exhibition in order to make contacts for the future. Here is my business card. My name is Dmitry Shipov. I am the director of the company.
B. – Very nice.
Business people today often exchange business cards when meeting. This is convenient and saves time, so if you are presenting a business card, it is not necessary to give your first and middle name, you can only give your last name. It's another matter if you introduce yourself without having a business card with you. Then you give your full first name, middle name, last name and contact phone number after the name or introduction of your company:
—, wholesale of building materials, I would like to meet you. We are interested in creating a wide dealer network in your region. I am sales manager Maxim Viktorovich Petrov. Unfortunately, I don’t have a business card with me, so I’ll write my phone number and last name by hand.
If you are acting as an intermediary, representing someone you know, you need to remember that there are a number of rules for representation. The “lowest” is introduced first to the “highest”. From the point of view of Russian etiquette, the interlocutor who is younger in age and social status will be inferior. A man will also be inferior in relation to a woman if positions are equal.
The primacy of elders in relation to juniors and women in relation to men is accepted among many nations. However, the order of accounting and arrangement according to the degree of importance of these features varies in different countries. In England - social status (financial condition, title), gender, age. In France, social status (social status, financial condition) and gender are equally important when choosing a label. In Russia - social status (social position, personal merit), age, gender. This means that an older man or a man occupying a high social position is presented with those who are younger and lower in position, and an older woman is presented with a young one. Gender in Russian speech official etiquette does not have an indexical meaning when choosing etiquette formulas and even forms:
Director Viktorova Elena Sergeevna
Manager Ulanova Oksana Mikhailovna
Expert analyst Anna Dmitrievna Klimenko
Meeting with the help of an intermediary has its advantages: the intermediary can not only introduce, but also characterize the employee, give him recommendations taking into account the goals of establishing contact. In addition to the surname (first name and patronymic), in this situation the position, the organization that the person represents, the academic degree (if any), and title (if any) are called. For example:
A. – Let me introduce you to our promising employee, marketing research specialist Yulia Vitalievna Glushko.
B. – Nice to meet you.
When meeting in a business setting, it may be necessary to give a recommendation to a particular employee for his participation in a particular project or business.
— Dmitry Aleksandrovich Denisov, head of the supply department of our plant, is punctual, responsible, and always finishes what he starts. You can rely on him. He will monitor the progress of the contract.
Questions for self-control
1. Define the concept of “etiquette”.
2. What is the general principle of using etiquette tools?
3. How does You-communication differ from You-communication?
4. What are the specifics of the system of addresses that has developed in Russian speech etiquette?
5. Are the addresses “mister” and “gentlemen” universal?
6. How does acquaintance in the business sphere of communication differ from acquaintance in the personal sphere of communication?
Exercise 1
Give examples from personal experience of the correct and incorrect use of You- and You-communication in business communication.
Task 2
Your business communication partner unjustifiably chooses You-communication. How will you behave? What etiquette formulas can you use to emphasize the distance of official communication?
Task 3
What speech etiquette formulas do you use to address:
1) to an elderly person to find out what time it is;
2) to the director’s secretary to find out the decision on your application;
3) to a policeman to find out how to get to the exhibition.
Task 4
What address will you choose at the beginning of your presentation speech if you know that the guests of the ceremony are businessmen, politicians, and journalists? What address is appropriate when addressing your employees? How to contact the secretary in the director's reception area? How do you address the doorman or waiter?
Task 5
Create a business card for yourself. Get to know your business partner using a business card.
Task 6
Introduce your manager:
1) with an arriving foreign partner;
2) with a client of your company.
Task 7
What etiquette phrases do you use to politely refuse:
· to accept the offer;
· send new catalogs;
· receive a visitor.
Task 8
Compose the text of a congratulatory speech in honor of the anniversary of the organization.
Task 9
Compose the text of a congratulatory letter addressed to the director of the company and compare it with the congratulatory texts that you usually address to your loved ones (structure, choice of address, self-name, congratulatory formulas).
Topic 14. Forms of business communication
Lesson 1. Rules of persuasion
There is nothing more important than winning the listener over to the side of the speaker. After all, people judge much more often under the influence of spiritual movements than in accordance with the truth.
Cicero
To create a favorable atmosphere of communication, it is important that everything said sounds convincing. The speaker achieves the greatest persuasiveness if he follows a number of rules.
1. The order of the arguments presented affects their persuasiveness. The most convincing order of arguments is: strong - medium - one is the strongest.
It is not the number of arguments that decides the outcome of the case, but their reliability. You should also not start with a request, you should start with arguments: since a request without arguments has the least chance of a positive decision. It is important to take into account one more circumstance: the same argument for different people can be both strong and weak.
2. To get a positive decision on an issue that is very important to you, put it in third place, prefacing him with two short, simple for your interlocutor, on which he will easily say “yes” to you.
It has been established that when a person says or hears “no,” norepinephrine hormones enter his blood, setting him up to fight. On the contrary, the word “yes” leads to the release of morphine-like substances - “pleasure hormones”. Having received two portions of the “pleasure hormone,” the interlocutor relaxes, is in a favorable mood, and it is psychologically easier for him to agree than to fight. Preliminary questions should be short so as not to tire the interlocutor or take up a lot of his time.
3. Don't drive your interlocutor into a corner. Give him the opportunity to “save face.”
Often the interlocutor does not agree with us only because agreement is somehow associated in his mind with the loss of his dignity. Offer a solution that gives the interlocutor the opportunity to get out of a difficult situation with honor - this will help him accept your point of view.
4. The persuasiveness of arguments largely depends on the image and status of the persuader.
It’s one thing when an authoritative, respected person speaks, it’s another when he’s insignificant and not taken seriously. A high official or social position, outstanding success in some area, education, recognition of others, high personal qualities raise the status and image of a person, and with them the weight of his arguments.
The support of the team also increases the status of the individual. The majority of both men and women believe that men have a higher status than women in our society. The status of the accuser is perceived as higher than the status of the justifier. Participation in the conflict also lowers the image.
5. Don't drive yourself into a corner, don't lower your status.
Insecure behavior demeans a person and is associated with low status. You should avoid apologizing (without proper reasons) and showing signs of insecurity. Here are some typical examples of a “suicidal” start to a conversation: “Sorry, am I interrupting?”, “Please, if you have time to listen to me.”
6. Do not belittle the status and image of your interlocutor.
Any manifestation of disrespect or disregard for the interlocutor is an attack on his status and causes a negative reaction. Pointing out the interlocutor's mistake or his wrongness negatively affects the image of the person being criticized. The visitor feels less significant if his chair is located far from the desk of the owner of the office.
7. We treat the arguments of a pleasant interlocutor with condescension, and we treat the arguments of an unpleasant interlocutor critically.
A pleasant impression, as we know, is created by many circumstances: respectful attitude, ability to listen, competent speech, pleasant manners, appearance, etc.
8. If you want to convince your interlocutor, start not with the points that divide you, but with the points in which you agree with him.
Let these be even minor circumstances in the interlocutor’s statement. Each of us listens with great pleasure to what he agrees with and what does not contradict his views. Conversely, we become irritated when what we hear contradicts our existing opinion. The first makes the speaker a pleasant interlocutor, the second makes him unpleasant.
9. Be a good listener.
Listening attentively is the key to your persuasiveness. You will never convince if you do not understand the way your interlocutor is thinking. In addition, an attentive listener wins over the interlocutor.
10. Avoid conflict agents.
Conflict triggers are words or actions (inaction) that can lead to conflict: rudeness, threats, ridicule, peremptory behavior, etc. Usually they do not go unnoticed, and the conversation turns into bickering.
11. Check whether you understand each other correctly?
Many words have multiple meanings depending on the context. In many cases, speakers simply have different understandings of the topic of conversation, and it is only necessary to understand each other to come to an agreement.
12. Watch your facial expressions, gestures and postures – yours and your interlocutor’s.
One who knows the language of gestures and postures “reads” the interlocutor, receiving additional information. At the same time, we are often unconvincing if our gestures and postures do not correspond to the words we speak. Knowing the characteristics of nonverbal communication allows you to make your speech more convincing.
13. Show that what you are offering satisfies some of the interlocutor’s needs.
A person needs to satisfy many needs: the need for security, confidence in the future, the need to belong to some community, the need for respect, the need for self-realization, the need to receive positive emotions, etc. And all this serves as a source for finding strong arguments.
In addition to the general rules listed above, you can give a few more specific tips that contribute to persuasion.
· Ask, don't assert.
(by being interested in the opinion of the person being persuaded, we satisfy his need for respect, raise his status. Being a good listener, we will find arguments that are most convincing for this particular person. By becoming a pleasant interlocutor, we will ensure a more loyal attitude to our arguments);
· make it clear that you got the idea from your interlocutor
(this is how you raise the status of your interlocutor; people treat their ideas more carefully than other people’s);
· fight the main objection
(“by smashing” secondary reasons, we are wasting time uselessly. Until the main objection is refuted, the interlocutor will remain unshaken);
· be as brief as possible
(you shouldn’t waste others’ time with your verbosity. Besides, verbosity is a sign of insecurity);
· speak directly
(you shouldn’t expect others to guess the reasons for your mood or our desires. Say “I’m angry because...”, “I’m upset because...”);
fight the problem, not the person
(there is a serious difference between the phrases “why can’t you clean up after yourself?” and “please clean up your desk.” In the first case, you are condemning a character trait and behavior, in the second, you are offering a solution to the problem);
· don’t be afraid to use the pronoun “I”
(Have enough confidence to say “I.” Saying “I” gives others the opportunity to accept or reject your proposal because you are taking responsibility for your opinions, speaking directly, and trusting the other person.)
The classical scheme of sequential influence on human consciousness has been well tested (in particular, in advertising):
⇐ Previous18Next ⇒
Basic motives for communication
Before moving on to the question of the emergence of motives for communication, it is necessary to briefly dwell on how we understand what a motive is in general.
The concept of motive in the concept of activity of A. N. Leontyev. As is known, the term “motive” is interpreted very differently by different psychologists (P. M. Yakobson, 1969; K. V. Madsen, 1974). In this concept of activity, which we took as a basis when interpreting communication, the concept of motive is closely related to the concept of need. A. N. Leontyev writes about it this way: “In the very needy state of the subject, an object that is capable of satisfying the need is not rigidly written down. Before its first satisfaction, the need “does not know” its object; it must still be discovered. Only as a result of such discovery does the need acquire its objectivity, and the perceived (imagined, conceivable) object acquires its motivating and activity-directing function, that is, it becomes a motive” (1983. Vol. 2. P. 205). Thus, the motive of the activity coincides with its subject. Consequently, for each participant in the interaction, the motive for communication is another person, his communication partner. In the case of communication with an adult, the motive for communication that encourages the child to turn to an adult by performing an initiative act of communication, or to respond to him by performing a reactive action, is the adult himself. When communicating with a peer, the motive for communication is another child.
But both the peer and the adult are very complex and diverse. In addition, they are constantly changing under the influence of various events and circumstances. At different periods of childhood, a child is able to see in his partner only part of his actual qualities. Growing up, the child comprehends other people in their increasingly essential and profound properties. At the same time, what motivates the social acts of children at various stages of preschool childhood also changes in the partner. This is how different categories of communication motives arise and each of them develops.
It is very important to take into account the fact that all participants in the interaction are active in the communication process. Consequently, if communication unfolds between a child and an adult, then not only the adult turns out to be the motive for the child’s social behavior: the child also necessarily becomes the object—and therefore the motive—of the adult’s communication activity. These two motives belong to different people: one to the child, and the other to his partner, but they function in the single interaction of these people and therefore mutually determine each other. While studying the motives of children’s communication with adults and peers, we were faced with the interweaving of their counter motives, so close that in most cases they can only be separated through complex analysis. We are constantly forced to talk not only about what attracts a child to a partner, but also about what he receives from him, becoming the motive (object) of the latter’s active communicative activity.
So, motive is an objectified need. It is natural, therefore, that in order to identify the main motivational categories of communication it is necessary to find those main needs of a small child that he cannot satisfy on his own. In search of adult help, children turn to people around them. An interaction unfolds between them, during which the child recognizes them from the side of the quality that they showed during communication, and the next time he comes into contact with these (or other) adults for the sake of this quality, already counting on it in advance. This is how, in our opinion, motives for communication arise in children.
What are the leading needs of children that give rise to their various communicative motives?
The main groups of motives for children’s communication with people around them. Analyzing the results of experimental work, we came to the conclusion that the motives that encourage a child to communicate with adults are associated with his three main needs:
1) the need for impressions;
2) the need for active activity;
3) the need for recognition and support.
Communication with an adult is only part of a broader interaction between a child and an adult, which is based on the specified needs of children. For the period of childhood that we studied, the most typical, according to many researchers, are precisely those 3 needs listed above.
The existence of an acute need for impressions in children is evidenced by the work of many researchers (D. Berlyne, 1960; L. Yarrow, 1961; CD Smock, BG Holt, 1962; L. I. Bozhovich, 1968; M. Yu. Kistyakovskaya, 1970; A.M. Fonarev, 1977).
After birth, the child discovers a craving for new experiences, greedily catching rays of light, intensely listening to different sounds, freezing at the touch of his body. Moreover, the more complex and unusual (that is, more informative) the object, the more it attracts attention, the longer the child’s interest in it. Over time, the need for impressions constantly increases and increases (J. Piaget, 1930; J. Brunner, 1970). But the child’s ability to independently satisfy this need is small. The duration of the state of helplessness leads to the fact that for a long time only through the mediation of adults can children satiate their thirst for impressions. Thus, the need for new experiences gives rise to a desire in children to come into contact with adults. This is how the first group of communication motives arises, which we call cognitive, or motives for communication between children and adults on educational topics. According to the proposed concept, this motive is the adult himself in one specific capacity: as a source of information and as an organizer of new impressions for the child.
The need for active activity is inherent in children as obviously as the need for impressions. Anyone who has observed the child is amazed at his irrepressible activity. The restlessness of children and their transition during the day from one activity to another indicate the severity of the hunger for activity they experience (M. McGraw, 1943; D. Elkind, 1971). The child’s lethargy and passivity serve as an unmistakable sign of his painful state (B. Spock, 1971) or developmental defects (see the description of “anaclitic depression” in children with symptoms of hospitalism (R. Shitz, 1946a, b). Perhaps the need of children for active activity is a special case of the phenomenon that is designated as “the need of an organ to function” (N.A. Bernstein, 1947).But for the purposes of analysis, it is enough that such a need is inherent in children.
During the first seven years, the activity exhibited by children reaches a high level of development both in form and content. But to achieve maximum effectiveness, children always need the participation and help of an adult. This leads to the fact that in the activities of children, interaction with adults appears, and among different types of interaction, a permanent place is occupied by the type that we call communication. Thus, the need for children to be active becomes a source of motivation for turning to an adult and gives rise to a special group of communication motives, which we called business, thereby emphasizing the main role of the activity in which the child is engaged, and the service, subordinate role of communication in which the child enters with the goal of quickly achieving some practical result (subject or game). According to the developed ideas, the business motive for communication is an adult in his special capacity - as a partner in joint practical activities, an assistant and a model of correct actions (D. B. Elkonin, 1978b).
Children's need for recognition and support has been emphasized by many researchers. D. B. Elkonin and T. V. Dragunova write about the presence of such a need in school-age children (Age and individual..., 1967); L. I. Bozhovich points to it, 1968 (L. I. Bozhovich, L. V. Blagonadezhina // Study of motivation., 1972). In general terms, A. Maslow (1954) and S. L. Rubinstein (1973) speak about the human need for recognition; asserting the human need for tenderness L. Festinger (L. Festinger, 1954). Early childhood researchers actually talk about the same need, calling it the need for maternal care and love (J. Bowlby, 1969; J. Dunn, 1977; R. Schaffer, 1977) or affection (N.M. Shchelovanov, N.M. Aksarina // Raising children..., 1955; L. Gardner, 1972). Upon closer examination, it turns out that children’s need for recognition and support is their desire for communication, because only as a result of this activity can they receive an assessment of their personality from others and realize the desire for community with other people.
This communication does not constitute a “service” part of the child’s broader activity - cognitive or productive, but is isolated from other types of interaction and closes in on itself. A characteristic feature of the described type of communication should be recognized as its focus on the personality of people - on the personality of the child himself, who is looking for support; on the personality of an adult, who acts as a bearer of the rules of moral behavior, and other people, whose knowledge ultimately serves the cause of self-knowledge of children and their knowledge of the social world. That is why we called the motives of the third group personal. In contrast to cognitive and business motives of communication, which play a service role and mediate more distant, final motives born from the needs for impressions and active activity, personal motives receive their final satisfaction in the activity of communication. As this last motive, an adult appears to the child as a special person, as a member of society, a representative of a certain group.
The described groups of motives listed above were identified in relation to the child’s contacts with adults. It can be assumed that when communicating with peers, the listed motives also have significance, although, apparently, they differ in some originality, as evidenced by the first works in this area (Ya. L. Kolominsky, 1976; I. S. Kon, 1980; M. I Lisina, T. D. Sartorius // Psychology of personality formation..., 1980; R. A. Smirnova, 1981). Thus, some works make us think that small children, communicating with their peers, see little of them themselves, but look very closely at their own reflection in their “mirror.” L.N. Galiguzova (1980) found, for example, that young children often cannot recognize among three friends the one with whom they met alone 15 times (!) before and played for a long time. Even preschoolers, after 3-5 lessons together, cannot always say what their friend’s name is; they almost never ask their peers about their lives (R. A. Smirnova, 1981). If a child of this age meets an adult, then the personal interest in him turns out to be immeasurably deeper.
Leading motives of communication. Cognitive, business and personal motives appear during the formation of communicative activity almost simultaneously. In a child’s real life practice, all three groups of motives coexist and are closely intertwined. But in different periods of childhood, their relative role changes: first one, then the other of them occupy the position of leader. Moreover, we are not talking about individual characteristics of the relationship between different motives (N.N. Vlasova, 1977), but about age-specific characteristics that are typical for the majority or for many children of the corresponding age. The bringing to the fore of a certain group of motives is associated with a change in the content of communication, and the latter reflects the characteristics of the child’s general life activity: the nature of his leading activity, the degree of independence (M. I. Lisina // Problems of General..., 1978).
The obtained facts showed that in the first half of life the leading motive for communication between children and adults is the personal motive. He is personified in the person of an adult as an affectionate well-wisher, who at the same time serves as the central object of cognition and activity of children. The works of A. G. Ruzskaya (Communication and its influence..., 1974), S. Yu. Meshcheryakova (1975), G. Kh. Mazitova (Problems of periodization..., 1976) confirm this conclusion. It may seem incredible how such a small child perceives an adult and himself personally. Of course, the personal motives for communication between infants are very primitive. They perceive only the attention and tenderness of their elders and experience the most amorphous, global feeling of their significance for them. But still, for a baby, personal motives are both accessible and extremely important. Interesting arguments in favor of this view are contained in the studies of N. N. Avdeeva (Problems of periodization..., 1976; Education, training..., 1977; Experimental studies..., 1979; Research on problems., 1980).
In her experiments, the experimenter sat near the baby's crib. He chose two actions of the child of approximately equal frequency and began to accompany one of them with prohibition, and the other with permission. The prohibition was that every time a baby, for example, brought a toy to his mouth, an adult, bending over, smiled and said: “No, don’t do that!” – and shook his head. And then the prohibition was replaced by permission, albeit for a different action (for example, waving a rattle), which the adult accompanied each time with the words: “Yes, so do it!” There were 7 sessions with prohibition in a row, 5 prohibitions per session, and with permission – also 7. The order of experiments with permission and prohibition was different for different children.
We did not choose the terms “prohibition” and “permission” by chance. The ban did not deprive the child of anything pleasant and did not cause him direct displeasure, and therefore it cannot be considered either negative reinforcement or punishment. The adult’s voice and facial expressions expressed only mild reproach, and this made prohibition different from permission even for children aged 1.5 months. Already at 3 months. infants were able to identify prohibitions and permissions in adult behavior and clearly distinguish between them; Every prohibition from an adult suppressed the child’s action, and every permission strengthened it. When prohibitions were repeated, inhibition developed in children, positive emotions weakened, and the overall picture of behavior became poorer; consistent resolution increased the children’s joy and increased the number of proactive actions.
But babies, it turns out, are already 2 months old. in life they soon realized that the experimenter always treated them warmly and tenderly. The adult's attitude was expressed in signs that were acutely felt by children in the first months of life: the adult chose this particular subject from among a group of infants; carried him in his arms to the next room and on the way carefully held him and uttered a few soothing, gentle words; during the experiment, the adult sat nearby, carefully monitoring the child’s actions and smiling even during prohibitions; After the experience, the adult again carefully took the child in his arms and carried him back. And so the child, while the adult was carrying him back, peered with loving attention into the adult’s face, tried to cling to him, made quiet sounds of pleasure, expressing his satisfaction from the communication. The infant's attachment to the adult increased from meeting to meeting, regardless of what happened in the experiments: whether the experimenter gave permission or imposed prohibitions. Apparently, in addition to them, the infant also perceived the adult’s more general attitude towards himself as a subject, independent of his (the infant’s) specific actions. Research by N. N. Avdeeva showed the amazing sensitivity of an infant to the affection and tenderness of an adult, even if they were combined with prohibitions that have the opposite effect on the infant’s behavior than signs of attention.
Starting from the second half of life and later, up to 2.5 years, the business motive of communication becomes the leading one. It is embodied in the person of an adult as a skilled play partner, a role model and an expert in assessing the child’s skills and knowledge. At an early age, children continue to appreciate the attention of an adult, rejoice in his praise (T. M. Sorokina // Experimental Research..., 1976; Problems of Periodization., 1976; 1977), but in the first place they put forward the desire for joint activity and, accordingly, those qualities an adult who make him a good partner in this matter. An “empty” caress that is not connected to anything usually irritates the baby and makes him dodge the stroking hand, and praise for a successful action causes the child’s special joy, and even the adult’s search for an attitude that precedes it. We observed (M.I. Lisina // Development of communication., 1974) that children of 2-3 years of age express their affection to adults by bringing them their toys, settling down to play nearby, from time to time showing the adult some object, inviting you to enjoy it together.
In preschool age, three periods are observed in the development of motives for communication: first, the leading place is occupied by business motives of communication, then cognitive ones and, finally, as in infants, personal ones. This pattern was clearly demonstrated in the study of A. G. Ruzskaya (Development of Communication, 1974).
Wanting to study the motives of activity of preschoolers, she used in her modification the technique described by U. Bijou and D. Baer (1966). She invited the child to play “on TV” and brought him to an isolated room, where there was a screen with sliding curtains on the table. After this, the child was sequentially offered the following options:
1) look alone at the wind-up toy appearing from behind the curtain;
2) to see an adult who smiled silently and, stretching out his hand from behind the curtain, stroked the child;
3) play with an adult in a toy, for example, a car, which the adult rolled out from behind the screen and then caught back from the child’s hands;
4) listen to a fairy tale that an adult emerging from behind the curtains was telling to a child;
5) talk with an adult on one of the proposed topics relating to the child himself and his life.
By pressing a button, the child could open the curtain himself, which remained open for only 30 seconds. If the child liked the proposed interaction, he could extend it by pressing a button when the curtain began to close. The experimenter could judge how attractive different interaction options were for the child by the number of button presses. The experiment was carried out in a different form: there were five buttons on the panel in front of the child, and he could independently turn on the program that was most interesting to him by pressing the corresponding button. The results of the experiments of A. G. Ruzskaya are presented in table. 1.2.
Table 1.2
Choice by children aged 2–7 years of an interesting option for interaction with an adult, number of children, %
She makes the following conclusions: “Younger children (2-3 years old) most often maintained playful interaction with an adult. From this fact we can conclude that the main motive for their communication with adults is toys and actions with them, as well as this person himself, but only as the child’s senior play partner.
Children 3–4 years old. attracted new impressions.
At 4–5 years old, preschoolers expressed their preference for... a situation where an adult told them a fairy tale. Obviously, the information provided by the adult, and he himself as a narrator, served as a motive for the children’s behavior when choosing a situation.
At 5–6 and 6–7 years old, there was a predominance of cognitive and personal motives satisfied by children when communicating with adults” (A. G. Ruzskaya // Development of communication…, 1974. pp. 201–202).
The conclusions of A. G. Ruzskaya were confirmed in the studies of Kh. T. Bedelbaeva (1978a, b), Z. M. Boguslavskaya (Development of communication..., 1974), E. O. Smirnova (Communication and its influence..., 1974, 1975, 1977) and in other works carried out using other methods close to natural experiments. As preschoolers grow up, they move from practical cooperation with adults to cooperation of a more mental – “theoretical” – kind and, finally, to contacts of an in-depth moral and personal level. At the same time, there is a change in the leading motives of communication - business ones give way to cognitive ones, and those again become personal ones.
Cognitive motives force children to ask adults dozens of questions on a wide variety of topics - from the reasons for the breakdown of toys to the secrets of the universe. Little “whys” at first almost do not listen to adults’ answers - it is important for them to express their bewilderment, they do not notice the contradictions in the words of an adult (Z. M. Boguslavskaya // Development of communication..., 1974). But gradually the desire to ask is replaced by the desire to find out, and here children can enter into an argument with adults, repeatedly ask them again, checking the confidence and reliability of the knowledge they convey (E. O. Smirnova, 1980).
The study of the motives for communication between children and adults leads to the following conclusions.
The motive for communication is the partner in those qualities for which the child proactively turns to him or supports the communicative activity undertaken by the adult. Therefore, the motive of communication will coincide with its object.
The motives of communication objectify the child’s needs, forcing him to seek the help of an adult, while the need for new impressions gives rise to cognitive motives of communication, the need for active functioning - business motives of communication, and the need for recognition and support - personal motives of communication.
In each period of childhood, one of the motives of communication comes to the fore and occupies a leading position. Thus, in the first six months of life, the leading motive in children’s communication is the personal motive, at an early age it becomes a business motive, in the first half of preschool childhood it is a cognitive one, and in the second half it is again a personal motive.
A change in the leading motive is determined by a change in the child’s leading activity and the position of communication in the system of children’s general life activities.
All groups of communication motives intensively develop and change during the first years of life. Thus, personal communication allows the baby to sensitively perceive the benevolent attention of an adult and not notice his other qualities. The personal motives of older preschoolers provide them with a fairly diverse, deep and rich knowledge about the essential properties of the adults around them.
