In the modern world, conflicts are inevitable, so it is important to understand their essence, be able to manage them, and strive to ensure that conflicts harm the individual and society as little as possible.
Social conflict is a collision of opposing goals, views, positions and opinions of different subjects of social interaction.
Social conflict usually grows out of social tension, which, in turn, appears due to the social heterogeneity of society, differences in income levels, prestige, or the presence/lack of access to power.
Stages of conflict.
Stage 1. Pre-conflict.
The conflict has not even emerged yet. Someone said something or didn’t say something, the other kept silent or didn’t keep silent. At first glance, nothing happened. But the snowball, from which an avalanche will later form, has already formed. Tension is gradually brewing between the future participants in the collision. If you don’t pretend that nothing is happening, at this stage the situation can still be neutralized with “a little bloodshed.” Neglect will not protect you from a quarrel. But the situation will develop on its own without the participation of opponents.
Gradually, the atmosphere heats up to such an extent that a small thing is enough: a look, a word, a gesture for a storm to break out.
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Stage 2. Conflict.
The conflict itself is an incident during which the majority loses self-control and habitually moves along a well-established pattern. Some prefer to shout and stomp their feet, others pull their heads into their shoulders and remain silent, others offer solutions, fourth go to court, and others give up. It all depends on the experience and vocabulary of your opponents. The greater the vocabulary of the participants, the higher the likelihood of ending the skirmish without the use of physical force.
The conflict cannot last forever. When the main intensity of passions subsides, the parties go in different directions and draw their own conclusions about what happened. Often these conclusions are based on emotions, and therefore have little to do with the real state of affairs.
Stage 3. Post-conflict.
The participants in the collision analyze the result obtained and compare it with their expectations. Were your expectations met? The attitude towards what happened inspires optimism. Unjustified expectations become a reason for “conflict phobia.” A conflict situation can lead to complete destruction of relationships or strengthen them. The destruction of relationships is often the first stage of a new conflict. Strengthening relationships allows us to conclude: not everything is so bad in a quarrel if after it you can make peace well.
But conflict is not called a living organism for nothing. It grows, feeds on the emotions of the participants, creates some potential for development, and experiences growth and decline in energy. It would be quite simple to divide such a complex system into only 3 stages. In order to better study and understand the energy of a collision, conflictologists divided the stages of conflict development into several stages:
- The pre-conflict stage is divided into 2 stages: emergence, maturation;
- The conflict stage is divided into 3 stages: incident, conflict, development of the situation;
- The post-conflict stage consists of stage 1: the consequences of the conflict.
Even when it seems that everything is out of control, you can use logic, common sense and move to cooperation instead of endless hostility.
Conditions for resolving social conflict
A conflict that neither side tries to resolve can continue for months or even years. To prevent such a situation, modern conflictology has formulated the conditions under which successful resolution of a social conflict is possible:
First, it is necessary to quickly and accurately establish the cause of the conflict. Often, it is eliminating the cause of the conflict that helps resolve the situation.
Secondly, both sides should be interested in ending the conflict as soon as possible. If one of the parties (or both) persists in the desire to support the conflict, then you need to explain to her the benefits of a peaceful solution to the problem.
Thirdly, the parties must jointly find a way out of the current situation; it is desirable that this way out takes into account the interests of both parties.
Fourthly, at the post-conflict stage, the parties must make every effort to ensure that the conflict does not recur.
Stages of conflict development.
Stage 1. The emergence of a conflict or “nothing foreshadowed trouble.”
To recognize a conflict at the initial stage, you need super-intuition or many years of experience as a conflict specialist. At the very start, you can resolve the situation in simple ways. When time has not yet been spent on the conflict situation itself, opposition forces have not been formed, and outside participants have not been attracted. The best way to resolve the issue may be a simple conversation between employees, spouses, parents, and children. It will reduce destructive forces and lead to a constructive solution to the brewing confrontation.
For example: the arrival of a creative and freedom-loving employee at a company with strict disciplinary frameworks generates active resistance on his part. If you ignore resistance in the early stages, spend energy on training a newcomer, convincing, overcoming resistance, you can destroy the existing team, lose discipline and let the situation get out of control.
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Stage 2. Maturation or “search for allies.”
At this stage, opponents already clearly define the scope of the controversial situation: work, friendship, family, relationships, power, money, sex, and so on. At the same time, preliminary work is being carried out to collect information and identify allies. Active negotiations are underway to find people who sympathize or do not sympathize with the opponent. Gradually, the formed groups concentrate and gain energy. Small skirmishes may occur at the same time, but a global clash has not yet reached. The best way to resolve the matter is through the intervention of an authoritative party who will help the parties meet and reach an agreement.
For example: low-intensity quarrels between different departments in an enterprise sometimes last for years. During this time, employees are more concerned with mutual accusations and discussing each other's shortcomings than with work. It is in the interests of the manager to gather opponents in one office, let them speak out, discuss and go their separate ways before disagreements lead to mass dismissal or open sabotage.
Stage 3. Incident or “trigger pulled.”
Unfortunately, sometimes participants only begin to recognize the conflict at this stage. When the roles of “victim”, “executioner”, “judge”, “bazaar woman”, “peacemaker”, “scapegoat” and others are already clearly distributed. No matter how carefully the opposition behaves, an unwashed cup, an incorrect number after the decimal point in a report, or any remark will become a click. As a result, a small pebble will lead to a rock collapse. The best thing to do at this stage is to concentrate on the reason for the disagreement, and not on the “small pebble”.
For example: a wife is dissatisfied with her husband’s earnings, her husband constantly criticizes her manner of housekeeping. But the cause of the scandal is a bad grade in the child’s diary. The child becomes not only a “pebble”, but also a “scapegoat”. Spouses should understand the reason for the discontent in time, not take it out on the children, but talk about everything in private.
Stage 4. Conflict or clash.
It is at this stage that aggression, rudeness, anger manifest themselves - all those signs of conflict, thanks to which many people gain negative experience and fear of conflict. But during a collision, information is exchanged. In a team you can learn about shortcomings in work or work organization, in a family you can reveal the reasons for dissatisfaction that have been hushed up for months. The best thing to do in this situation is to remember that peace is considered the best outcome of a quarrel.
For example: in the relationship between parents and teenagers there is rarely complete agreement. If you simply push with authority or pretend that nothing is happening, you can destroy the relationship forever. Therefore, it is worth trying to hear each other, choose words, and share your fears or experiences.
Stage 5. Development of the conflict or choice of tactics.
At this stage, the subject of the dispute remains unchanged, but the behavior of the opponents changes. Roles may even be redistributed. And now the attacker himself becomes the object of criticism. When the peak of tension and aggression subsides, opponents try to end the quarrel simply because the situation is unpleasant for them. The best thing you can do is to use logic, prudence, politeness, tact and sort things out to the end.
For example: overt rudeness, the phrases “you are a rude person” or “you are a deceiver” will transfer the conflict to the level of a showdown, and the original reason will remain behind the scenes. Therefore, you should not succumb to your opponent’s provocation and try to get to the bottom of the truth.
Causes
Whatever the conflict, the main prerequisite for its occurrence is a clash of opposing interests, goals or opinions. However, there are objective factors that determine the causes of contradictions. But they are so diverse that it is impossible to group them according to any classification.
Natural causes of conflicts are the most common. People are social, they live in society. They tend to defend their point of view. After all, this is how they protect what is dear to them - personal values. But only some manage to keep the situation under control, while others do not. As a result, temper and aggression begin to appear, and everything develops into an acute, contradictory situation.
Rational approach to the problem
Perhaps the best system for resolving interpersonal contradictions belongs to the American psychologist Thomas Gordon. He studied the main stages of the conflict for a long time and eventually developed several stages of constructive resolution of controversial situations.
First of all, opponents must identify the problem. We need to specify it, name it, and give precise wording. Then you need to talk about mutual feelings, expectations and needs. The parties to the conflict must hear and understand each other. And then, together, come up with ways to solve the situation. The more there are, the better. All the same, at the next stage, each option will have to be considered from a logical point of view and unsuitable ones will have to be discarded aside. And from the remaining ones, choose one that would suit each side. And bring it into reality.
Surprisingly, many conflicts in relationships are resolved this way. Expressive arguments won't help anything. It's a matter of mutual respect and a practical approach to the situation.
Incident
If you do not cope with the initial stage, then this is where the conflict will develop. The stages of conflict following the “zero” stage are incident and escalation. They are developing rapidly. The incident implies the beginning of a controversy. Sometimes it may seem like it came out of nowhere. But that doesn't happen. In most cases, this simply turns out to be the “last straw”, which no longer fits into the cup of the initial stage. And a conflict breaks out.
The stages of conflict following an incident involve intense passions. Opponents argue, put forward arguments, swear, and the tension between them increases. This process is called escalation. How long it will last depends on the reason why it all started, and on the participants in the controversy themselves. For some, the dispute is resolved in an hour. And some are capable of enmity for years, decades and even generations. Just remember the famous tragedy of William Shakespeare, which revealed the theme of the conflict between the ancient families of Montagues and Capulets, which has been going on for centuries.
Climax
This usually ends the conflict. The stages of the conflict listed earlier are often divided into several more stages, but everything ends with the so-called “dead point”. The climax does not always mean a truce on both sides. On the contrary, most often it implies the occurrence of an event whose destructive power is so great that it simply becomes unsafe to continue to develop the contradiction.
For example, we can again turn to the tragedy “Romeo and Juliet”. Why did the Montague and Capulet families end their feud? Because it was because of her that their children died. They realized the meaninglessness of their conflict, allowing the death of Romeo and Juliet. Only the death of the children conveyed to them that kindness and love should rule the world, and not anger and enmity. The truce became a repentance and an attempt to ask forgiveness from the victims for cruelty, pride and misunderstanding.
However, in real life, the parties to the conflict do not always come to the conclusion that the aggravation of relations has ceased. Some only intensify hostile actions, and this destroys not only the opponent, who has already become an enemy, but also themselves.
