diagnostics of stress, Fear, anxiety Irina Vasilyeva Have you ever had such situations when you were incredibly ashamed of the fact that you were experiencing irrational fear at a time when others did not feel anything like that? Have you ever experienced a feeling when you lost control of yourself: you screamed, waved your arms, tried to run away? Has it ever happened that you behaved inappropriately due to panic? If you answered “Yes!” to any of these questions, then you definitely need to read this article.
Good afternoon, dear reader! Fear that is uncontrollable or a persistent experience of intense anxiety in specific situations or when encountering certain objects is called a phobia.
There are as many phobias in the world as objects, creatures and phenomena. What are people not afraid of?
In this article I will talk about the most popular fears. And also about the most unusual ones - those that you can’t even imagine that you can be afraid of. Of course, I will also tell you about the help you can give yourself and your loved ones in the fight against uncontrollable fear.
What are phobias
A phobia is an intense fear of something that actually poses little or no real danger.
Common phobias and fears include fear of enclosed spaces, heights, highways, flying insects, snakes and needles. Although almost anything can cause a phobia, most phobias develop in childhood, but they can also appear in adulthood. If you have a phobia, then you realize that your fear is irrational, but, nevertheless, you are not able to control your feelings. Even the thought of a dangerous object or situation makes you anxious. And when you face in reality what you are afraid of, horror, arising automatically, stuns you.
This experience is so debilitating that you begin to avoid it as much as possible, thereby causing yourself inconvenience or even changing your lifestyle. If, for example, you are claustrophobic, you may turn down a lucrative job offer because you need to ride the elevator to get to the office. If you are afraid of heights, you may prefer to drive an extra 20 kilometers to avoid a high bridge.
Understanding a phobia is the first step to overcoming it. It is important to know that phobias are common. Having a phobia does not mean you are crazy! It is also important to understand that phobias are effectively treatable. You can overcome your anxiety and fear no matter how out of control you feel.
Barbara's fear of flying
Barbara is afraid of flying.
Unfortunately, she has to travel a lot for work, and this travel causes her terrible inconvenience. A few weeks before each trip, she begins to feel a knot in her stomach and constant anxiety. On the day of the flight, she wakes up and feels nauseous. As soon as she boards the plane, her heart is pounding, her head is spinning, and she begins to hyperventilate. It gets worse and worse with every flight. Barbara's fear of flying is so severe that she finally told her boss that she could only travel by land on business trips. Her boss wasn't happy about this, and Barbara isn't sure how it will affect her job. She is afraid that she will be demoted or lose her job altogether. But it's better, she says, than getting on a plane again.
Ritiphobia – fear of wrinkles
Ritiphobia mainly affects women and occurs regardless of age. Even very young women suffer from this phobia: they obsessively take care of their face, apply various anti-wrinkle creams and regularly subject themselves to rejuvenation procedures.
Ritiphobia can have serious consequences if we lose moderation. People suffering from this disease often become dependent on plastic surgery and “cosmetic” procedures, such as Botox injections.
The difference between normal fears and phobias and irrational fears
In dangerous situations, feeling fear is normal and even healthy. Fear is an adaptive human reaction. It serves a defensive purpose by activating the automatic fight-or-flight response. When the body and mind are ready for action, we can quickly react and defend ourselves.
But in the case of phobias, the threat is greatly exaggerated or even completely absent. For example, it's natural to be afraid of a growling Doberman, but it's irrational to be afraid of a friendly poodle on a leash—which is exactly what people with dog phobias face.
| Normal fear | Phobia |
| Feeling anxious when entering turbulence or taking off in a thunderstorm | Refusing to attend your best friend's wedding because you have to fly to get there |
| Feeling fear while looking at the top of a skyscraper or climbing a tall staircase | Turning down a great job because it's on the 10th floor of an office building |
| Getting nervous when you see a pit bull or rottweiler | Avoid parks because you might see a dog |
| Feeling slightly nauseous during a vaccination or blood draw | Avoid necessary medical procedures or doctor's appointments because you are afraid of needles |
Normal fears in children
Many children's fears are natural and tend to develop at a certain age. For example, many young children are afraid of the dark, so many ask to leave the lights on at night. This doesn't mean they have a phobia. In most cases they grow out of this fear.
If a child's fear does not interfere with his daily life or cause him much anxiety, then there is no reason to be alarmed. However, if fear is interfering with your child's social activities, affecting school performance, or disrupting sleep, you may want to see a qualified child therapist.
What childhood fears are natural?
According to the Child Anxiety Society, the following fears are common and considered normal:
0-2 years
Loud noises, strangers, separation from parents, large objects.
3-6 years
Imaginary phenomena: ghosts, monsters, darkness, loneliness, strange noises.
7-16 years
More realistic fears such as injury, illness, having to answer in school, death, natural disasters.
Triskaidekaphobia – morbid fear of the number 13
Triskaidekaphobia stems from the deeply rooted superstition in our culture that the number 13 brings bad luck. This phobia was described by psychiatrists already in 1910. Many famous personalities suffered from it, for example Napoleon Bonaparte, Richard Wagner, Mark Twain, Franklin Roosevelt.
Given the prevalence of this phobia, some hotels have abandoned rooms numbered 13, and the elevators do not have a button with this number. Often they also refuse the ill-fated number in sports games when determining the starting numbers of athletes.
Types of phobias and fears
There are four general types of phobias and fears:
- Animal phobias
. Examples: fear of snakes, spiders, rodents and dogs. - Natural phobias
. Examples: fear of heights, storms, water and darkness. - Situational phobias (fears caused by a specific situation)
. Examples: fear of closed spaces (claustrophobia), flying, driving, tunnels and bridges. - Phobia of blood, injections, injuries
. This is the fear of blood, injury, disease, needles, or other medical procedures.
Some phobias do not fit into any of the four general categories. Such phobias include fear of suffocation, fear of cancer, and fear of clowns.
Social phobia and fear of public speaking
Social phobia, also called social anxiety disorder, is a fear of social situations. In this case, you are afraid that they might embarrass you or say something judgmental about you. You may also be overly shy and fear that you will be humiliated in the eyes of others. Your worries about how you will appear and what others will think may lead you to avoid certain social situations, even those that would bring you pleasure.
An extremely common phobia, fear of public speaking is a type of social phobia. Other fears associated with social phobia include eating in public, talking to strangers, taking exams, attending parties, and answering in class.
Agoraphobia (fear of open spaces)
Agoraphobia is another phobia that does not fit into any of the four categories. Traditionally it was thought to be a fear of public places and open spaces. It is now believed that agoraphobia develops as a complication of panic attacks.
Afraid of having another panic attack, you begin to worry about ending up in situations where it will be difficult for you to escape or where help will not be immediately available. For example, you will begin to avoid crowded places such as shopping malls and movie theaters. You may also want to avoid cars, planes, subways, and other forms of travel. In more severe cases, you may only feel safe at home.
Nomophobia – fear of losing access to your phone
Nomophobia is considered a new disease of civilization. Manifested by fear of lack of telephone contact with family and friends.
A nomophobe is afraid that his phone will die prematurely, lose the ability to communicate with the network, or it will be stolen, and you will not be able to get important information. When a nomophobe is deprived of a phone, he experiences anxiety, irritability, and panics.
Nomophobia mainly affects young people - it is estimated that up to 70% of teenagers have some symptoms of this disorder.
Signs and symptoms of phobias
Symptoms of a phobia can range from mild feelings of fear and anxiety to a full-blown panic attack. Generally, the closer you are to something you fear, the greater your fear will be. Also, fear will be higher if it is difficult to get away from the object of fear.
| Physical symptoms of phobias | Emotional symptoms of phobias |
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Symptoms of blood and injection phobias
The symptoms of blood and medical procedure phobias are slightly different from other phobias.
When you encounter the sight of blood or a needle, you experience not only fear, but also disgust. As with other phobias, you become anxious and your heart rate increases. However, unlike other phobias, this acceleration is followed by a rapid decrease in blood pressure, leading to nausea, dizziness and fainting. Although the fear of fainting is common in all phobias, this is the only phobia where fainting actually occurs.
Causes
In the process of the emergence of fear of fear, the defining moment is the perception of fear itself and its subsequent memorization in the person’s subconscious.
Phobophobia is characterized by the fixation in memory of intense and painful individual sensations that the patient cannot control on his own. This state is associated with external stressors, so in the future it depends solely on the emotional perception of the surrounding world.
Description of phobophobia
People who suffer from phobophobia may also have hidden other fears that arise for various reasons:
- fear of experiencing a state of anxiety and panic again;
- concern about your health (the disease is often accompanied by pronounced symptoms, which sometimes resemble an attack of angina or other life-threatening painful conditions);
- worry about your state of mind;
- fear of losing control and doing something obscene or indecent in the presence of others;
- fear of a situation arising that could pose a real threat to human life (when at heights, when driving, etc.).
Such attacks of fears are combined simultaneously, with one fear becoming the main one, and the others feeding it and allowing the disease to develop. There is also an alternating occurrence of various phobic disorders, which lead to the appearance of panic fear.
When to seek help for phobias and fears
Although phobias are common, they do not always cause significant distress or greatly disrupt one's lifestyle. For example, if you have a phobia of snakes, it may not cause problems in your daily activities if you live in a city where you are unlikely to encounter them. On the other hand, if you have a serious phobia of crowded spaces, living in a big city will present a challenge.
If your phobia really doesn't affect your life, then you have nothing to worry about. But if avoiding the object, activity, or situation that triggers the phobia interferes with normal functioning or prevents you from doing the things you enjoy, it's time to get help.
Consider treatment for your phobia if
- The object of a phobia causes intense fear, disgust, anxiety and panic
- You acknowledge that the fear is excessive and unfounded
- You avoid certain situations and places because of the phobia
- Avoidance interferes with daily life or causes distress
- Phobia lasts more than six months
Self-help or psychotherapy: which is better?
When it comes to treating phobias, self-help strategies and therapy can be equally effective. What's best for you depends on several factors, including the severity of the phobia, your health insurance coverage, and the amount of support you need.
As a general rule, it's always a good idea to try self-help. The more you can do for yourself, the more controllable your condition will seem to you, and this is very important when it comes to phobias and fears. However, if your phobia is so severe that it causes panic attacks or uncontrollable anxiety, you may be able to get additional support.
The good news is that psychotherapy for phobias has a long history. And it not only works very well, but, as a rule, very quickly - sometimes in just one to four sessions.
However, support does not have to come from a professional psychotherapist. Having someone to hold your hand or sit with you when you face your fears will also be incredibly helpful.
Tophophobia – fear of being buried alive
Tophophobia may be exacerbated by stories about people who were presumed dead even though they were alive. Especially for people suffering from taphophobia, they invented a coffin with an alarm system that responds to movement.
In the UK, where this phobia is very common, some funeral companies offer their clients the option of being buried with a telephone - in case the person locked in the coffin “comes to life” and wants to call for help.
Tip 2: Learn to calm down quickly
When you are afraid or anxious, you experience a variety of unpleasant physical symptoms, such as a racing heart and a feeling of suffocation. These physical sensations in themselves can be frightening - and this is the main reason that makes your phobia so severe. However, by learning to calm down quickly, you will become more confident in your ability to tolerate discomfort and overcome fears.
Being able to work with someone you trust is the fastest way to calm your nervous system and dispel anxiety. If you don't have a close friend to lean on, you can quickly calm down by turning to your realm of physical sensations:
- Movements
. Walk, jump, or lightly stretch. Dancing and running are especially effective for relieving anxiety. - Vision
. Look at everything that relaxes you or makes you smile: a beautiful view from the window, family photos, photos of cats on the Internet. - Rumor
. Listen to soothing music, sing your favorite tune, or play a musical instrument. enjoy the relaxing sounds of nature (live or recorded): ocean waves, the sound of trees, birdsong. - Smell
. Light scented candles. Smell the flowers in the garden. Breathe in clean, fresh air. Spritz with your favorite perfume. - Taste
. Slowly eat your favorite treat, savoring every bite. Drink a hot cup of coffee or herbal tea. Chew some gum. Enjoy peppermints or other favorite caramel candies. - Touching
. Give yourself a hand or neck massage. Hug a pet. Wrap yourself in a soft blanket. Get some fresh air.
What causes kaynophobia: the origins of the problem
Fear of dating almost always takes root in childhood or adolescence. The soil for the emergence of kenophobia is laid in the family. Often parents demand from their children complete obedience, modesty, and politeness bordering on helpfulness. The child is taught that only complete agreement with others can ensure his success in the future. Parents immediately stop the little one’s slightest attempts to demonstrate their point of view and show independence. The result of such upbringing is a shy and indecisive person who is afraid of everything.
Another aspect of upbringing is the excessive demands and strictness of parents. A child is criticized for a tiny offense. He is not allowed to make mistakes. He is simply not allowed to experience life and learn from personal experience. Such parents themselves arrange for their child to meet the “right” children. The child is not allowed to contact those peers who are interesting and attractive to him. As a result, the baby does not develop communication skills. Having matured, a person does not know how to establish contacts in society.
A fear that parents also instill is fear of strangers. Moms and dads put it into their children’s heads that contacts with strangers will definitely result in trouble. He is frightened by the “everywhere” maniacs, rapists, robbers and murderers. They suggest to him that an unfamiliar uncle or aunt will cripple and mutilate him. As a result, such a child is afraid of all phenomena in the world around him, which in his understanding is nothing more than a source of threat.
The cause of kainophobia in men is a pathological fear of women, which arose due to matriarchal upbringing . This phenomenon often occurs when a boy is raised by one mother. It is from the mother that all rewards and punishments come. Children and teenagers experience first-hand the dictatorship of their mother, who rules the family. Over time, the child develops a kind of dependence on the authoritarian mother. Having matured, such a boy projects unconscious fear onto all female representatives.
Another reason for kenophobia is a person’s belief that he lacks any virtues that might be attractive to the opposite sex. Such a subject is sure that he cannot interest a new acquaintance. He is convinced that his proposals will be rejected. This denial of one’s own uniqueness and worth is also the result of a problematic period of growing up.
Kaynophobia can also be caused by negative personal experiences. Of course, fear of dating is a natural consequence of experiencing physical or sexual violence. Also, fear of dating occurs if a person has had a negative dating experience. More precisely, when the subject interpreted the current circumstances as tragic irreparable events. For example, when, when meeting new people, a person became the object of ridicule or criticism. Or unfair reproaches and groundless accusations were directed at him. The suspicious individual took the words of those around him very painfully and focused his attention on the phrases he heard.
Tip 3: Practice relaxation techniques
Relaxation techniques such as deep breathing and muscle relaxation are powerful antidotes to anxiety, panic, and fear. With regular practice, they will improve the ability to control the physical symptoms of anxiety, which will seriously reduce the phobia. Relaxation techniques can also help you cope more effectively with other sources of stress and anxiety in your life.
Simple deep breathing technique
When you're anxious, your breaths are fast and shallow (called hyperventilation), which increases the physical symptoms of anxiety. Deep belly breathing will help relieve the physical sensations of anxiety. You will physically not be able to experience anxiety when you breathe slowly, deeply and calmly. Within a few short minutes of deep breathing, you will feel less stressed, out of breath, and anxious. You don't have to be anxious to practice this technique. In fact, it is best to practice when you feel calm. Then you will be able to strengthen the skill and feel confident and comfortable in performing the exercise.
- Sit or stand comfortably with your back straight
. Place one hand on your chest and the other on your stomach. - Inhale slowly through your nose to the count of four
. The hand on your stomach should rise. The hand on your chest should move very little. - Hold your breath for seven counts
. - Exhale through your mouth for a count of eight
, pushing out as much air as you can by contracting your abdominal muscles. The hand on your stomach should move as you exhale, but the other hand should move just a little. - Inhale again, repeating the cycle
until you feel relaxed and centered. - Practice this deep breathing technique for five minutes twice a day
. Once you have mastered the technique, start using it when faced with a phobia or other stressful situations.
Meditation to relieve stress and anxiety
Meditation is a relaxation technique that can help prevent anxiety and also improve brain function. When practiced regularly, meditation increases activity in the areas of the brain responsible for feelings of calm, helping to quell fear and panic before they arise.
Development factors
In order for a person to develop a fear of dating, certain events must occur . Some people are afraid of being judged by others. This feeling is familiar to those who have been ridiculed by adults or children. Therefore, when trying to make a new contact, he subconsciously expects ridicule and condemnation.
Someone, having received a negative reaction once, expects it again. This often happens when trying to make acquaintances with the opposite sex. Some men are afraid of receiving insults, aggression, or other negative reactions. Dozens of possible scenes of humiliation are played out in his imagination. From the outside, a person perceives himself as a “pervert” or “stupid” at the moment of establishing communication.
Tip 4: Challenge Negative Thoughts
Learning to deal with unhelpful thoughts is an important step in overcoming a phobia. When you have a phobia, you tend to overestimate the horror of the situation you fear. At the same time, you underestimate your ability to cope with it.
The anxious thoughts that trigger and fuel phobias are usually negative and unrealistic. The following advice can help you “dispel” these thoughts from your head. Start writing down any negative thoughts you have about the phobia. Often these thoughts fall into the following categories:
- Predictions
. For example, “this bridge is about to collapse,” “I will definitely be a fool,” “something will definitely happen to me when the elevator doors close.” - Overgeneralizations
. “I already fainted once when I was given the injection. I'll never be able to give an injection without fainting." "That pit bull lunged at me. All dogs are dangerous." - Catastrophization
. “The pilot said we were entering turbulence. So the plane will crash!”; “The man next to me coughed. Maybe it's swine flu. I'll get sick!"
Once you have identified your negative thoughts, analyze them. To get started, use the following example.
An example of a negative thought: “The elevator will break, and then I will be trapped and suffocate.”
Is there any evidence that contradicts this idea?
“I see a lot of people use the elevator and it has never broken down.” “I don’t remember ever hearing about someone dying of suffocation in an elevator.” "I've never been in an elevator that's broken." “There are vents in the elevator that will keep the air from running out.”
Is there anything you can do to resolve the situation if it happens?
“I can probably press the panic button or call the phone to get help.
There is some error in the logic
"Yes. I'm guessing because I don't have any evidence that the elevator will break down."
What would you say to a friend with the same fear?
“I would probably say that the chances of that happening are very low because you don't see or hear about things like that very often.
Source: Mood Juice
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It can also be helpful to come up with some positive things to say to yourself when you encounter a phobia. For example:
- “I felt this before and nothing bad happened. Although this is unpleasant, it will not harm me.”
- “If the worst happens and I have a panic attack while driving, I’ll just stop and wait for it to pass.”
- “I've flown many times and the plane has never crashed. In fact, I don't know anyone who was involved in the plane crash. Statistically, flying is very safe.”
How does kainphobia manifest itself: signs of the disorder
Fear of dating is irrational and inexplicable. A person gripped by cenophobia understands that something is wrong with him. However, he cannot understand and explain why the pathological fear of dating arose. Analyzing the facts from his own life, the sick subject cannot get to the bottom of the reasons that initiated the abnormal fear of new contacts.
Another characteristic feature of kenophobia is the obsessive nature of fear. Anxiety completely takes over a person’s thinking. Such a subject is constantly immersed in thoughts about possible acquaintances. Frightening images arise in his head of how he will be forced to meet strangers in the future. At night he sleeps uneasy. The plots of his dreams reflect his experiences: he dreams of unfamiliar girls and men with whom he is forced to contact.
Obsessive thoughts do not allow the subject to focus on other aspects of life. A sick person cannot perform a work task efficiently because it is difficult for her to understand the essence of the issue. A person gripped by cenophobia ceases to be interested in exciting activities, since his fear keeps him in suspense and does not allow him to relax and have fun.
All areas of life suffer from fear of dating. A person with cenophobia cannot build personal relationships, since meeting a person of the opposite sex is an impossible mission for him. Such a subject cannot overcome his fear, which is why he simply does not approach unfamiliar girls or men. If the meeting does take place, he freezes in place in horror. His breath catches. He feels his heart beating. He is exhausted by trembling and chills.
He feels his speech paralyzed by fear. He forgets the phrases he wanted to say. As a result, he cannot say a word. Hearing a question addressed to himself, he cannot find the words to answer. At the same time, the more he sympathizes with a girl or guy, the stronger his fear. As a result, he does not establish contact with the person he likes
The failed acquaintance once again further emphasizes the incompetence and indecisiveness of the patient. Every time he experiences a fiasco, his ideas about his own inferiority become stronger. A person with cenophobia considers himself an insignificant and useless person. As a result, such an individual begins to have thoughts about the meaninglessness of existence. The idea that his life is useless is confirmed by the thoughts that a normal person should have a strong and friendly family with numerous offspring. From a feeling of inferiority and abnormality, the subject has suicidal ideas. Quite often, the progression of kenophobia results in successful or incomplete suicide attempts.
In addition to the inability to build normal personal relationships, cenophobia also harms other areas of life. The sick subject has a very narrow social circle or no contact with anyone at all. He avoids meeting with colleagues and refuses social gatherings because there may be strangers at the party.
The career of a subject gripped by fear of dating also suffers greatly. Most often, such a person chooses professions that are not related to communicating with people. Often, at the same time, he sacrifices his abilities and cannot reach his potential. If he works in some public position, then each new meeting with strangers turns into a severe nervous shock for him. He literally shivers and panics when he spots strangers on the horizon with whom he simply must come into contact. At the moment of acquaintance, the patient may feel increased heartbeat and suffocation. His blood pressure skyrockets and he feels dizzy. Cases have been described when a person, during moments of panic attacks, lost consciousness due to fear overwhelming her.
“Robber” No. 7. Fear of falling out of the spotlight of others and losing their interest in yourself
He is scary to those who are used to attracting attention to themselves in simple ways, for example, by telling jokes and funny incidents from the lives of friends. As they try to move small steps along the road of self-development, they want to share something more important, to increase their level of significance. But the environment is not at all interested in this; they switch their attention to simpler and more understandable things. Lazy people by nature have no choice but to regain their former central position using proven methods. They get stuck for a long time at the very beginning of the path or completely refuse to move on.
What should I do?
To become a unifying principle for those who are on the same path, to develop oratory skills in order to voice the idea of the “thinkers”: why and why they should all strive to reach the finish line as a single team.
