Reasons for coldness in relationships
It is rare that in a marriage, spouses manage to maintain interest in each other after several years of marriage. Most often, wives in such a situation immediately begin to panic: the husband has fallen out of love, divorce is inevitable, nothing can be fixed. But the cooling of relations has completely logical explanations, because no problems arise out of nowhere.
It may be difficult to maintain love for many years, but if you understand the true reasons for the decline in interest in each other, deeply analyze the situation, it will become clear that everything can still be changed for the better, breathe new life into the relationship, make it brighter and more emotional.
The most common reasons for coldness in relationships are:
- Low self-esteem of a woman. When a wife devotes herself completely to her husband, she loses part of her personality, as a result of which her husband's interest in her decreases. You need to love yourself, make time for your own hobbies, and self-care. Developing a woman will only attract a man.
- Children. Pregnancy and the birth of a child are a turning point in a relationship. The woman pays almost all her attention to the baby, sleeps poorly, interest and attraction to her husband is almost zero. The man is jealous, although he understands that it is stupid, he feels his wife’s detachment. Gradually, interest in her disappears.
- Monotonous life, boredom. Spouses see each other every day; routine and lack of change cause a loss of interest. The couple begins to quarrel constantly, irritation arises for any reason. If you don’t bring anything new into the relationship, feelings will cool down.
- The husband devotes himself entirely to work, often stays late or goes on business trips. In this case, the wife must show tolerance, avoid scandals, and play along with her husband. It is worth taking an interest in his work affairs and successes more often, showing sincere interest. Light flirting and signs of attention in the middle of the working day (SMS, notes, original voice messages) will help. They will cheer you up and arouse interest.
- Mistress. It is no longer possible to cancel the fact of betrayal, but you need to understand that all of the above, as a rule, leads to the husband looking for a relationship on the side. It is much easier to prevent this than to try to fix it later.
When a man relaxes, knowing that a caring wife is always waiting for him at home, he stops showing her signs of attention (gifts, compliments, romantic walks). Gradually, the wife, not seeing interest on the part of her beloved, stops taking care of herself, her attractiveness quickly disappears, which upsets her husband. All this certainly makes family life boring. If you do not take any action, sooner or later you will have to raise the issue of divorce.
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Seduction lessons for a determined and courageous girl
- So, if you are faced with the problem of how to seduce your colleague while working on a complex project, and nature has managed to reward you with determination and the ability not to succumb to public opinion, then everything is much easier and faster.
- So, for example, you need to find a mysterious “zest” in yourself, a riddle or secret that will attract the hunting instinct of your opponent. Let him be tormented by thoughts about why he attracted a girl like you, and he will want to explore all the ways of how to seduce a decisive and courageous female colleague.
- By all means, get rid of the temptation to keep secrets with your employee, who also happens to be your girlfriend. It is likely that she is also in love with the man of your dreams, or is a freelance correspondent for word of mouth. Without compelling reasons, such a PR move will not bring the expected benefit, but, on the contrary, will complicate the situation and even make it irreparable.
- Seducing an employee or colleague necessarily involves studying his tastes and preferences, hobbies and hobbies. To start a relationship, try inviting a man to an event that will bring pleasure to both of you. In this case, you should not organize a trip to a restaurant, cinema or theater, since your hint will be very “thick” and unambiguous.
- Surprisingly, almost all men are afraid of open initiative coming from a woman. But if, after an evening spent together, a relaxed opportunity arises to invite a colleague home for a cup of tea, take advantage of it, and then be guided by the circumstances and mood.
What you need to know about seduction
Seduction can be considered an art form. In many cultures, girls are taught techniques to seduce men from childhood. A woman lives by emotions, she has well-developed intuition. Many girls subconsciously understand how to behave and manage their sexuality so that a man is submissive.
But you need to understand that even if you managed to charm a man and take him down the aisle, the hardest part is just beginning. Seduction is not a temporary action, but constant and painstaking work. For your husband to constantly experience attraction and interest, you need to fight for it, then love will not go anywhere, and your intimate life will be rich:
- Transfiguration. First you need to work on yourself. It is worth getting rid of old clothes, purchasing beautiful lingerie (seductive panties and bras, stockings, peignoir), which will emphasize sexuality. It’s better to fill your wardrobe with dresses and buy new perfume. There is no need to radically change your appearance, just work on your femininity, periodically surprising your spouse with bold images.
- The atmosphere in the house. The role of a woman as a homemaker is not disputed. You need to maintain a cozy environment at home, especially in the bedroom. It is enough to purchase beautiful bed linen and complement the interior with romantic little things (candles, flowers). A man in such an atmosphere will experience feelings filled with eroticism. Perfume with pheromones and aromatherapy using aphrodisiacs (essential oils of patchouli, jasmine, ylang-ylang, neroli) are very helpful. It is better to get rid of old things that remind you of long years of family life. Frequent changes of environment will help feelings not to stagnate.
- Joint outings, romantic walks, and attending events are simply vital. This will be an excellent reason to show off in front of your loved one in new seductive outfits. Let him see that his wife is a beauty that others are staring at. You should avoid old routes when walking, let everything be new. A playful mood also helps. You can hint to your husband that you left your underwear at home today. The likelihood that he will rush to complete the walk is extremely high. And he will hurry home not for underwear. Passion must be maintained by sometimes playing the “bad girl.”
- Diversify sex. So that the husband does not even think about other women, he will have to work. It’s worth watching an erotic movie or video together. Both will be satisfied with the result. You definitely need to try new sex positions and add role-playing games. This will help sharpen your senses. Intimate life should not be only at night; daytime is not a reason to give up pleasure. A mirror will add eroticism, you will enjoy making love in front of it, you should leave the embarrassment behind. You need to let the man know that he is the only one.
If feelings suddenly cool and mutual interest fades away, you need to understand what exactly went wrong, study your husband’s desires, and then start a dialogue with him.
What to do if you are afraid to take the initiative?
- In this case, the rules on how to seduce a male colleague you like are full of caution and delicacy. Try to find out about his hobbies outside of work as unobtrusively as possible and, for example, start visiting the same fitness club. Even if nothing works out, an excellent figure and meeting new candidates are guaranteed.
- Actively use all the features of social networks. Add a man as a friend on VK or Odnoklassniki, feel free to like the photos and comment wittily on them. Along the way, you can try to find out what exactly attracts him in women, what style of clothing he should prefer, and what he means by the concepts of “well-groomed” and “pretty.” It is likely that it is enough to go to the hairdresser and change the length of your skirt.
- It’s rare that a man is not puzzled by how to quickly seduce a female colleague who is building a successful career. Take note of this and become more successful in terms of work and self-development. Enroll in a foreign language course, get a second degree, and show interest in modern trends in business, art, social life, and so on.
- If after this the style of communication between you has not changed in any way, and your close communication comes down only to dancing at a corporate party, you should think about whether you need this man, and whether he is “the one.” No one argues that it makes sense to try all the ways to gain attention, but sometimes you just don’t need to waste a lot of precious time for the sake of a “dummy”.
- Do not overdo it with seduction methods, because this can have a very negative impact on your career and the atmosphere within the team. If after, for example, three months of effort, you do not observe any positive changes, take a deep breath and look at a more interesting candidate.
According to statistics, it is natural for a person to change his or her work field once every 18 months, so if you haven’t found your soul mate in one job, feel free to move on to the next level. Happy and safe romance!
Let's talk about sex
Without a rich sex life, we cannot talk about a revival of interest. Sex is the basis of harmonious and vibrant relationships. If a husband sees in his wife not only a faithful friend and a caring housewife, but also a passionate lover, he is unlikely to grow cold. The following tips will help you seduce your spouse in bed:
- Looseness. It should not be confused with vulgarity or vulgarity. The first thing you need to do is accept your own body, realize your needs. Sex should be fun and not perceived as a chore.
- You definitely need to be frank with your husband, taking into account both his and your desires. It is important to be able to relax, not only to give pleasure to your husband, but also to experience it yourself, without setting conditions.
- Emotional background. The right mood of a woman excites a man. You shouldn’t be shy; while making love you should definitely look your spouse in the eyes - it’s very exciting.
- Entourage. The environment around you is important. Linen, candles, dim lighting, aromas - all this has a strong effect on the imagination and helps to tune in to the right mood.
- Voice. Talking to your husband during sex will only add to the severity of the sensations. Topics should be limited to what a magnificent man he is, and you should definitely compliment him on his appearance and sensuality. You need to speak more quietly so that your speech is captivating. It is worth pronouncing the words as you exhale.
READ How to please a man in bed: secrets of intimate life
A woman’s energy is also very important. You need to smile at your husband and not constantly voice problems. Positive emotions greatly influence the emotional background.
You should go to bed naked more often. A man is unlikely to resist hugging his beloved and will take the initiative.
Role-playing games
Variety in your sex life is the key to a strong relationship. You shouldn't limit yourself to making love in the bedroom. New places will enliven intimate life and add spice to sensations. It could be a kitchen, bathroom, elevator, car, nature.
Don't avoid sex shops. The erotic mood will go uphill if you purchase several toys for adults. You shouldn’t be afraid of experiments; they will help you get to know each other better, understand your needs and satisfy them.
Few men do not dream of role-playing games. This is very exciting, it allows the imagination to run wild, and the husband simply cannot restrain himself. It would be nice for him to play a lustful nurse, a maid, a guilty student - there are a lot of options. In some cases, you can try more “hard” options with dominance, when the husband is in complete power of his lady.
It all depends on personal preference. It is worth starting a conversation with your spouse in advance about what he would like, what fantasies excite his brain. But even if he is silent, there is no need to be ashamed to be independent. No man can resist if suddenly his beloved appears before him in a seductive role-playing outfit and starts a game.
Erotic massage can be considered one of the forms of role-playing games. Once you master several techniques (tantra, geisha), a man will not remain indifferent. Such actions excite both partners and provide vibrant sex.
A joint trip to an erotic massage salon
Most often, men and women go to erotic massage salons alone. What if you go there with your spouse alone? New sensations are guaranteed, especially since you can learn special techniques from masseuses so that you can try them out later alone with your spouse.
READ How to seduce any man: proven female tricks
The only problem may be the jealousy of one of the spouses. After all, not every woman can calmly watch as her man is caressed by another. The same goes for men. It is worth discussing this possibility with your spouse in advance.
Learning new poses
It is not enough to study the Kama Sutra; it is very important to be able to present yourself correctly. You need to monitor your posture, understand in what positions your body looks most attractive (sitting, standing, focusing on pieces of furniture). You can look at recommendations for photography; as a rule, poses for a portfolio are selected taking into account that the body looks as seductive as possible.
As for sexual positions, in no case should you focus only on missionary. This does not excite anyone, and the pleasure from sex is minimal. There is no need to be afraid to experiment; only practice can show in which positions each spouse gets maximum pleasure.
It is also important to choose the right places to have sex. If you suddenly want intimacy on the table, you shouldn’t deny yourself this.
How to satisfy your husband in bed: erotic techniques
First, you should tell your husband that you want to play touch games. Tell him that you have a desire to satisfy him and give him pleasure, that you are very pleased to recognize and feel your body next to yours.
How to seduce and satisfy your husband - easy! You should tell him what you want to do with him. Tell him you want to undress him. Remember his characteristic gestures when he comes home and begins to take off his casual clothes.
Such gestures show him declaring himself free from all daily worries, from all formality. And if you extend your hands, thereby showing him that you are ready to help, have no doubt that he will only be happy.
To avoid the question of how to satisfy your husband in bed, you should know your man thoroughly. What he likes and what he doesn't. What he wants, what he dreams about, what he desires. Tell him that you want to enjoy the moment when he undresses.
Both your and his movements at this moment should be slowed down, because it is often at this time that many couples miss such valuable seconds of pleasure. Slowly and sensually remove his shirt and trousers, and then, slowly, explore his erogenous zones.
Hold his hand in yours. Run your tongue over your hand, then grab his palm with your tender and hot fingers. On the back of the hand there are very sensitive hairs that will be extremely pleasant to touch from a woman's hands.
The hand you are kissing, let it take hold of your breast, let it caress it, after which you can let it slide lower. Kiss his fingers, stroke them with your tongue. Most likely, the man will want to respond in kind; you shouldn’t resist this.
But you can also forbid him to do this, saying that today he will receive pleasure exclusively, and he will have the opportunity to answer you with the same love a little later. After examining his hands and lips, ask him to sit on the bed or try to drag him there with you.
On the bed, trace the contours of his toes with your gentle hands; they are extremely sensitive to any touch, but they will especially enjoy the gentle touch that comes from the woman they love.
To seduce your husband, give him a gentle and light massage. And it may not necessarily be the back or shoulders. Massage can be performed on almost any part of the human body. Be it an arm or a leg, a head or a stomach.
Do not doubt at all that your gentle touches will give a man true pleasure. You shouldn’t show in any way that further sex will be a reward for a man for anything, they really don’t like it. It should be shown that sex is a given to the man you love, without any reason.
An important component of success in how to satisfy your husband in bed is your appearance. He must be attractive to a man, he must want you and lust after you.
You should take care of your body, because no matter what a man says that he loves you for who you are, nevertheless, each of them periodically glances at young and slender girls. In this case, it is worth keeping your body in good shape.
By the way, few people like excessive hair growth on their wife, so you should shave these small imperfections as carefully as possible. But it is worth remembering that irritation in the bikini area will be even worse for a man’s perception than complete unshavenness. And, of course, you shouldn’t fake orgasms with your beloved man, even if this will raise his self-esteem; most people can perfectly distinguish deception from the real state of affairs.
Ex-husband
It happens that a woman still has feelings for her ex-husband. Then the question of how to seduce him is extremely relevant. This is difficult to do, but it is possible. It is enough to follow a number of recommendations:
- Be natural. Falseness and acting are immediately noticeable, they are repulsive. Sincerity will help win the affection of your ex-spouse.
- Confidence. When a woman knows her worth, she certainly attracts attention.
- Attractiveness. A well-groomed woman always looks advantageous in the eyes of a man. There is no need to go to extremes by choosing extravagant outfits and hairstyles. It is enough to be feminine, apply light makeup that emphasizes your appearance, and be sure to watch your posture (it will emphasize your figure). Elegance and sophistication of the image always win.
- Don't impose. This kind of behavior is repulsive. You need to be calm and restrained.
- Flirting. Easy, casual communication is conducive; it’s worth maintaining intrigue and remaining mysterious to your ex. Unobtrusive gestures, facial expressions, playful glances and other non-verbal signs will always be on the woman’s side.
How to attract the attention of a married man
Every woman herself understands how to attract the attention of a certain representative of the stronger sex. Much depends on the character of the family man and his relationship with his wife. The length of the marriage should be taken into account.
When a husband has tender feelings for his wife, he will not look at other women for a long time.
After three years, a woman can try to win her loved one.
Appearance
You can attract the attention of a family man in the same way as a single guy. Start with your appearance: well-groomed appearance, hairstyle, manicure, makeup.
Dress beautifully and seductively, making you want to admire yourself. There is no need to allow vulgarity if you are striving for a serious relationship.
Light coquetry and smiling can quickly win you over. The girl needs to demonstrate that the presence of a guy is a great joy, that extraneous things cannot interest her when her beloved man is nearby. This is not difficult to do when there is love.
Behavior
When a woman has ensured that a man pays attention to her and responds to flirting, communication can be consolidated. Any lady strives for more results than interested glances; she wants her admirer to fall in love with her.
You need to ensure that all the thoughts of the chosen one are addressed to you, so that you become an irreplaceable friend.
It is important to give a man what he is deprived of at home. There must be novelty in the relationship, which is contained in the woman herself.
Compliments
Spouses rarely praise their husbands. Many things are perceived by wives as ordinary actions.
A woman should praise a man’s muscles, muscles, clothing style, down to the little things, such as the ability to park a car.
You need to praise a lot and to the point, but assertiveness can scare off a guy. Men do not like annoying ladies and can simply disappear from sight.
Watch the video. How to behave with a married man? Relationships with a married man.
Passion
Intimacy is given great importance in relationships.
A woman needs to awaken in a man the passion that has been lost during marriage. In family life, over the years, the quality and quantity of sex has decreased.
Start with hints about a close relationship. A man strives to possess a woman before starting a relationship. Intimacy must be the gift he has desired for so long.
Consolidate the result
It is important to pay attention to a man and be interested in his life. This is not difficult if you are work colleagues.
Common mistakes
A woman’s behavior often interferes with establishing contact with her husband. If the goal is to seduce your spouse, then you should avoid the following mistakes:
- Lack of patience.
- Disrespect for personal boundaries.
- Obsessiveness.
- Too direct behavior, lack of intrigue, riddles.
- Imposing change.
- Unwillingness or inability to listen to the wishes of the husband, ignoring his opinion.
- Indifference, depression.
- Stealth.
- Suspicion, jealousy.
- Mistrust.
Only sincerity, genuine interest and the ability to accept his opinion will help in mastering the art of seduction. When a man sees that a woman really wants to spice up the relationship, he will readily meet her halfway.
Learning to seduce your own husband will not happen the first time, it is the result of hard work. Without desire you can't do anything. But you need to start by at least using small tricks and techniques. A woman should not forget that she is attractive, no matter how much she immerses herself in solving everyday issues.
G.Z.B.P method
Here's what this abbreviation means:
- Speak slowly and sexy.
- Eye contact.
- Proximity.
- Touch.
Use all four factors to convey interest, tension, and sexual attraction.
Now let's take a closer look at all the details.
G: Talk slow and sexy like a lover
Talk to the girl as if you've already had passionate sex.
Remove all plaintive, ingratiating, pleading intonations from your voice.
You want to fuck her, not ask to borrow money.
If you speak too quickly, it will make her nervous and you will appear needy.
If you speak too slowly, you won't hold her attention.
Girls need strong emotions, interest, passion.
Practice speaking sexually in a low, deep voice.
This in itself can cause a lot of excitement, but more on that later.
Z: Make eye contact until she looks away
I don't mean staring into the eyes before you even meet.
It will look creepy and aggressive.
But when you already start communicating with a girl, then during the conversation several times, as if by chance, catch her gaze and look until she becomes embarrassed and looks down.
This is the most important factor of all four.
Your mouth interacts with her ears, your eyes interact with her instincts.
And instinct is, first of all, a primitive craving for procreation.
If I am giving advice to a young guy who is going on his first date with minimal theoretical knowledge, I ask him to immediately make eye contact, because this sets the tone for subsequent communication and shows who is the leader in the couple.
I hope you agree to take the dominant role.
This immediately makes you more masculine and attractive.
Your calmness and confidence are transferred to the girl, she relaxes and begins to treat you with trust, as if you have known each other for many years.
It's also a great way to project sexuality without giving the girl a slut complex.
It is not she who seduces you, but you who seduce her.
This will also help you avoid getting into the friend zone and not looking like a “ good boy ” who is too early to have sex.
Good eye contact immediately makes you a "man" and a "sexual partner" rather than a "weird, scared little boy you want to hug and cry."
Your look says much more about you than a thousand words.
B: Proximity, come to her
Use any excuse to touch her, but do it in a way that makes the girl feel comfortable.
If you are sitting in a cafe, sit not opposite her, but next to her.
Invite her to slow dance.
Say something in her ear.
If I want to get closer to a girl I like, I structure the conversation so that there is an excuse to show a few photos on my phone.
You can find dozens of natural excuses to be as close to a girl as possible, but without feeling discomfort or embarrassment.
P: Touch her
When this happens naturally and seems appropriate, then any touch stimulates a chemical release in the body, and she subconsciously begins to get used to the very idea of physical contact.
I like to be secretive, especially at the beginning of a relationship, so I occasionally whisper something in her ear, while always touching her waist, back, shoulders, and the back of her head.
When secrecy is not appropriate, you can touch her hand during a conversation, sit closer to her so that your thighs touch.
This is a classic that works.
Your task is to bring all these four factors of successful seduction to automaticity.
Start by showing your own confidence when interacting with women, projecting sexual tension, which naturally covers all areas of the G.Z.B.P. and saves a lot of time.
How else can you use G.Z.B.P
As a more advanced technique, a man can create an image of authority, break rapport and project a sexual state, and she will have to live up to this state in order to regain rapport.
This is a deeper and more advanced topic that deserves more serious consideration.
You can make her do G.Z.B.P. towards you by saying something like this in the middle of a conversation about a date or sex:
“You know, this reminded me of one situation.
I was talking to a friend of mine the other day and he admitted that he couldn't quite tell when a woman was attracted to him or turned on by him.
This is a big problem for him, since he does not know in which direction to move next.
I told him that it was actually very simple.
Have you ever heard of method acting?
Well, the principle of this method is to convey your thoughts and feelings through external manifestations, but so that it looks natural and not feigned.
Do you think you would make a good actress?”
Let her answer, and then continue:
"Let's try.
If you really liked me, how would you look into my eyes now?
Okay, now how would you lean closer to me or touch me discreetly?
How would you say, “You look very sexy now,” what tone would you use?
Now, if you combine all these techniques, you will look like a woman who is truly interested in a man.
All these things happen naturally, thanks to the state in which she is.
I think any man could feel her attraction.”
Let the girl go through this consistent demonstration of G.Z.B.P. towards you.
In this case, the rule “ where the mind goes, the body follows ” will probably work.
She will be excited enough to kiss you.
Even if this doesn't happen, she will be interested enough to move on to more sexual topics or try some other seduction technique.
How mirror neurons come into play
No, we will not talk about “ mirroring ” or “ mirroring ”, which are written about in all articles on marketing, sales and seduction.
Mirror neurons underlie highly effective covert human influence.
This happens when you incorporate all of these forms of sexual tension into your core vibration.
Don't worry about her noticing you doing this.
Most likely, you have already unconsciously acted on this principle and have been projecting your sexual interest onto girls for many years.
And all this time the women deliberately “ didn’t notice ” this. Unless, of course, you start touching them too early or too intrusively.
Since you have an unconscious influence on her, it changes her attitude towards you as a man and causes a feeling of sexual arousal.
Sometimes she will perceive this as her own condition.
It is at this moment that mirror neurons appear.
Mirror neurons as defined by Wikipedia:
“Neurons that fire at the same intensity both when an animal is doing something and when it is simply watching others do it. At this moment, the neurons “reflect” the behavior of the stranger to the same extent as if the observer himself performed these actions.”
You see that this is not “ mirroring and imitation to achieve rapport .”
Instead, with mirror neurons, you project your state onto the girl and take certain actions through which she experiences exactly the same state of sexual arousal and interest as you do.
In addition, being in a sexual state with sufficient confidence relaxes her.
This puts you in the category of lovers in her mind, because you are already acting like a lover, thereby instilling these thoughts in her.