The main question that all single guys ask themselves is where to find the one and only? The problem of finding a good girl is a very serious one for many, despite the fact that more than 7 billion people live on our planet.
You can wander around the world year after year and never find the most important person in your life. You can go to clubs every weekend, and chat on social networks on weekdays, and still remain unnecessary to anyone.
Many guys have been looking for a life partner for many years, some may date dozens of girls, others may date one or two, but they still can’t find a girl for a relationship. In order to find out this, and not encounter this in the future, you need to find out why this happens.
Rule #1. Leave the house.
Remember once and for all - sitting with a bowl of chips and a bottle of beer in front of a computer monitor, you will never find a girl! At least not the kind.
It is unlikely that the slender, graceful, busty and well-groomed dream girl walks around apartments and knocks on the door of homebody losers. Unless she's a postman, of course.
What to do? To go outside. Yes, yes, right now. In order not to mess up when meeting her, I advise you to familiarize yourself with the 10 mistakes that men make. And if you don’t know how to properly meet people on the street, then read this article and everything will immediately become clear to you.
Secret Tip #2: Create Connections
No matter how guys prioritize the question of how to meet a girl and no matter how many video podcasts they study, the statistics are inexorable: only 7% occur in such spontaneous meetings of future girlfriends in a bar or club. Everything else is girls from a social circle, friends of friends, one company, a group, and so on.
In other words, I want to tell you an important thing - to find a girl, you need not only to leave the house, but also to communicate with other people (of any gender).
Most likely, you will meet your future girlfriend through a friend or through your connections. This could be a holiday, a big dinner, or an art show to which you are invited. Such social events will bring invaluable benefits - you will meet more girls. Even if not exactly there, you will meet a new person or meet people who have their own social connections and in their social circle there are young ladies you desire.
Here's another trick that you most likely intuitively guessed: when you are a sociable person, you increase not only your value, but also the value of the interlocutor in his own eyes. About
Rule #8. Your appearance.
If you think that only men evaluate women first by their appearance, then you are deeply mistaken.
Girls pay attention to your figure, hands, shoes, hairstyle, clothing style. This first impression is as important to them as it is to us.
Therefore, you must be well-groomed, you must take care of yourself, go to the gym, keep yourself in shape.
Pay attention to your clothes. Be stylish and choose things that suit you. This will give you even more confidence, and therefore attractiveness in her eyes.
What prevents you from getting to know each other?
According to psychologists, every second guy has a number of problems that interfere with communication with the opposite sex. Because of this, young people remain single for a long time.
Shyness
External gloss can be deceiving. Many seemingly confident men turn out to be incredibly shy individuals. Even the thought of talking to an unfamiliar lady almost causes them a panic attack. There are 4 main reasons that provoke the development of timidity:
- fear of failure based on past experiences;
- low self-esteem;
- strict education;
- perfectionism.
In order not to deprive yourself of a full life, you need to fight shyness. You can do this in the following ways:
- You need to accept your own shortcomings. You shouldn’t go out of your way to show people only the positive sides of your personality. No one is perfect, so when communicating with friends, you need to relax and give vent to real emotions and actions.
- To increase self-esteem, you need to avoid friends and acquaintances who do not miss the opportunity to criticize. If it is not possible to hide from someone else’s opinion, at the moment of a monologue it is better to think about something detached and not take the spoken words to heart.
- Novelty should not be avoided. The unknown is scary, but facing fear head-on boosts confidence and self-esteem. For those who have never gone to a nightclub, now is the time to conquer the dance floor. If you don’t know how to ride a horse, it would be a good idea to take a few lessons from a rider.
Lack of free time
Routine affairs, work, and everyday problems can absorb all your free time. Because of this, at the end of the day there is no energy left to meet girls. But the lack of time for leisure is inextricably linked with improper self-organization.
If a man’s priorities include the desire to have a companion, planning will help in resolving this issue. It is enough to create a detailed daily routine in which time will be allocated for rest and acquaintances. At first it will be difficult to do this, and it will become even more difficult to follow the certified plan. But the more effort you put into realizing your plans, the faster time to rest will become a habit.
Complexes
The problem that prevents a guy from meeting an attractive woman may be an inferiority complex. “I’m ugly, fat, there’s nothing to talk about with me,” such thoughts can torment a man for years.
You should not succumb to the painful provocations of your own consciousness and give up. If there is a problem, then there is a solution.
You can fight complexes at home with the help of introspection. To do this you need:
- Write down on a piece of paper all the shortcomings that prevent you from feeling confident.
- When looking at the list, you need to ask yourself: “What can I do to improve the situation?”
- For each item, you need to write a solution to the problem: if excess weight interferes with your life, then you need to reconsider your diet and go to the gym.
- Follow the plan.
If you can’t cope with the problems on your own, you should consult a psychologist. A specialist will help you find the right path to conquering the heights of life.
Love triangle
To make my point as clear as possible, I will tell you a short story. Most likely, you will recognize yourself in this story. Moreover, if you recognize yourself in this story, then I am not writing this text in vain.
I want to explain one thing to you: you must seduce the girl you like as quickly as possible . As fast as you can.
And to show you why you should seduce a girl as quickly as possible, I came up with this story.
The story of a pretty girl Masha, and two guys - Egor and Oleg.
One fine day, Olga met these guys (of course, at different times), they got to know each other, and both guys decided to get Olga for themselves, since they both found her very interesting.
So, who are our heroes?
Egor is a budding entrepreneur. He has a small but promising business. In principle, things are already going well for Yegor, but he is working hard to climb even higher on the slope of financial success. He makes good money, has a good car, a large apartment, impeccable clothing style and a slender, trained body.
Oleg doesn't have a car at all. He works as a trainer in a fitness center and lives in a rented one-room apartment. True, in a new house. He often meets with friends, smokes hookah at a bar and chats about women. From time to time he goes to the club; on weekends he and his friends go out of town, where they grill meat and drink beer. Well, come up with something of your own here. I am sure that the image of Oleg, an ordinary guy in general, is well known to you.
Egor and Oleg met Masha one day, they liked her, and both decided that they wanted to sleep with this girl.
Egor was the first to invite Masha on a date. They went to a nice restaurant where Yegor dines periodically. At the restaurant, Yegor told her about his business, successes and failures. He also has many stories about travel, exotic places and his hobbies. Maria is delighted - she has finally met the man of her dreams, whom she dreamed about during her long girlish nights! At the end of the evening, Yegor took the girl home in his big black jeep. And, since he liked Masha, he decided not to rush things. That’s why Yegor kissed her on the cheek at the house and wished her good night.
The next day, Yegor calls Masha, and they chat nicely. In addition, to make a strong impression on the girl, he sends flowers to her office. And she achieves her goal - Masha is delighted! Yegor heard that in order to get a girl, there is no need to rush. Therefore, he decided not to rush into a second date, he didn’t want to ruin everything. He makes an appointment in a week, and Masha enthusiastically agrees. Masha will miss him very much all week. And when they meet, he will charm her even more. That's what Yegor thought. Perfect plan!
But, since a week is long enough to unwind, Masha decides to meet with Oleg. Just so you don't get bored. Masha thinks about Yegor all the time, she is waiting for the meeting. But - since you have some free time, why not just, in a friendly way, meet and chat with a nice guy.
Oleg meets Masha in a small cafe near the house. Throughout the evening he tells funny stories from his sports past. Also, he has a lot of jokes and funny incidents from the life of his gym. At the same time, Masha at first thinks about Yegor all the time. She has already mentally married him, bore him children, and savors the feeling of how cool it is to be Yegor’s wife.
Nevertheless, Oleg makes her laugh again and again. They fool around and have a great time, but Masha still doesn’t see any future with Oleg.
They spend a couple of hours in the cafe, after which they move to Oleg’s apartment - just to smoke a hookah and play a video game console. Oleg's house is clean and tidy. They smoke a hookah, play Mortal Kombat, drink a little and, completely unexpectedly for Masha, end up in Oleg’s bed, where they make love.
Oleg is quite good in bed, at the same time he has a beautiful body, and he is very witty. Masha was not going to have sex with him, but... something washed over her. She remembers Yegor with bitterness, but what happened happened.
They have dinner - and very simply, dumplings and scrambled eggs - and Masha stays with Oleg for the night. For Masha, everything that happened between her and Oleg was a complete surprise. She didn't plan to have sex with him. And in general, she has already mentally married Yegor. Therefore, she classifies what happened with Oleg as an easy adventure (of which, by the way, any girl will have dozens), and goes about her business.
Over the next days, Masha experiences conflicting emotions. She corresponds and chats on the phone with Yegor - and the moment of their meeting is getting closer. But, at the same time, she mentally returns to the meeting with Oleg. And she admits that Oleg is quite a nice guy, and she had a good time with him.
Egor is running errands. And Oleg offers to meet in a couple of days. And Masha agrees - because she wants to explain to him that there is nothing and cannot be between them. And in general, she’s not like that, but she’s dating someone else. And with this determination, she goes to meet Oleg.
Oleg doesn’t particularly bother with how Masha treats him. He doesn't think much about how she perceives him. And, to be honest, he doesn’t particularly value Masha - because for him she is nothing more than an interesting adventure. But he liked the girl, and he was all for having a good time with her.
They meet again. And they have sex again. The second time this happens is already familiar. Masha again stays with Oleg to spend the night. And in the morning he goes to work. And she convinces herself that these meetings are nothing serious, and she will stop meeting with Oleg as soon as her relationship with Yegor begins. Which she, of course, thinks a lot about
Meanwhile, a week passed. Egor makes an appointment with Masha. And they go to the theater and watch Kalman's operetta. Masha is in a beautiful dress, they are sitting in the stalls in excellent places. Masha is delighted. However, to her surprise, she can’t stop thinking about Oleg. Twice they met, twice she stayed at his house, and many times they made love. For Masha, these are unexpectedly pleasant and exciting memories. Her thoughts return again and again to Oleg’s apartment. And, unexpectedly, he discovers that he is waiting and wants a new meeting with him.
After the theater, Yegor takes Masha home, kisses her, wishes her good night, arranges a new meeting and leaves.
Over the course of several days, Oleg and Masha meet several times. Masha feels great in Oleg's apartment. She cooks food - because she spends the night with him. She grumbles at him for throwing things around and puts things in order. She gets used to falling asleep next to Oleg, and she really likes having sex with him.
And then Yegor calls and invites us to have dinner together. Maria agrees - since Yegor seems to her - still - a very worthy guy, and she wonders what he came up with this time.
And this time Yegor invites Maria to his home. He has a wonderful apartment in the center. And Yegor also heard that on the third date people usually have sex. He carefully prepared for the date. And when Masha comes to him, she is impressed. Yegor has a wonderful modern apartment. Egor decided to prepare dinner for this evening. And, since Masha is a guest, Yegor cooks himself. The menu includes a three-course dinner, Italian cuisine, and seafood.
There are candles burning on the table and a bottle of expensive wine. “Enigma” is playing, and Masha understands perfectly well where everything is going. They are having dinner and Yegor tries to kiss her. Masha pushes him away.
“I’m not like that,” she says to Yegor. “This is too fast for me. You are hurring to much. We need to get to know each other better” - Yegor has heard this many times already. I also heard from Masha. Yegor is somewhat discouraged. He did everything perfectly. Had three wonderful dates. The girl is at his house. And he says: “No.”
He decides to be persistent - but only meets with even more fierce resistance. Egor gives up, takes Masha home and kisses her on the cheek again.
Egor received a very strong blow to his pride. And not for the first time. He decides to change the situation - and calls the girl to set up a new meeting. However, Masha replies that she is busy. And, of course, as soon as she sorts things out, she will immediately call him herself.
I hope you understand - what kind of business has suddenly arisen for Masha? Everything is simple and obvious - she meets Oleg with all her might, spends the night with him, cooks food for him, cleans up his apartment, and has sex with him.
Masha is building relationships. Moreover, not with the richest and most beautiful of the two. And with the one who ended up in her bed as quickly as possible.
Masha’s brain made the following conclusions: if she ended up in Oleg’s bed very quickly, then he is the best male.
Since he managed to achieve in one evening what others spend months on, it means that he has a very large number of outstanding qualities. Masculine qualities. And once Masha found the strongest male, she began to build a relationship with him.
Quite logical from a woman's point of view.
And a complete nightmare - with men's
Dangers of the Internet
Dating on the World Wide Web may seem like the easiest solution. Of course, each of us at least once heard love stories that began with correspondence and simple emoticons, and ended in a happy marriage. But before you go online in search of your one and only, it’s better to know about some of the dangers that may lie in wait for you there.
- Fraud. Quite often, a photograph of your chosen one may turn out to be a fake, and the sincerity of the girl’s attitude towards your person may be fueled by a thirst for profit. This type of fraud has been known for a very long time, and if your chosen one starts asking you for money, then be prepared for the fact that the relationship will not last long.
- Deception. He can be direct, or he can be completely innocent. For example, a girl may lie about her age, education or hobbies in order to make herself more attractive. Such a lie can be easily forgiven if further communication with your chosen one brings only pleasure.
How to woo a girl to keep her
Not always acquaintance can develop into a full-fledged relationship. For this to happen, a man needs to properly care for a lady. After this, the woman’s heart will open to love. To avoid getting turned around by the gate, you must:
- Be yourself. You should not start a relationship with deception and misconceptions. A girl has every right to know what kind of man she is communicating with.
- Don't forget about compliments. Ladies love with their ears, so they are always grateful for sincere compliments. The main thing is not to use templates.
- Tell jokes. Girls love fun and laughter. When going on a date, you need to have a few jokes and funny stories in stock. At first, it is better to avoid vulgarity and black humor.
- Give gifts. Women enjoy attention to their person. You don't have to buy expensive things. Cute and original souvenirs will always warm your soul.
- Respect personal boundaries. There is no need to try to establish tactile contact with a lady on first dates. It takes time for a woman to get used to her partner. A normal guy will take these wishes into account.
- Show interest. If you like a girl, you shouldn't hide it. All kinds of actions should “shout” about it. Girls appreciate men who remember their hobbies, tastes and interests. You should demonstrate your own knowledge in this area and offer a joint activity that she likes.
- Pay attention to the baby. If a woman has a child, she needs to be interested in his fate, because this is her loved one. Such a move will have a beneficial effect on male karma.
Getting rid of obsession2
It’s a paradox, but men who are interested in how to find a girl for a relationship spoil the very possibility of a relationship with this very search. Each interlocutor is bombarded with a ton of unnecessary information about herself, hundreds of proposals for a meeting. The theoretical gentleman is seen in her eyes as an obsessive stalker. It is clear that the guy will achieve nothing but fear with his obsession.
The correct approach lies in dosing the information given; it is better to generally give the girl the opportunity to chirp like a bird (they love this). It is enough to communicate once about your desire to have a closer date and let the person make his choice. People who know how to speak beautifully are found on every corner, and people who know how to listen are much less common.
You can't show yourself to those in need. Pity is not a feeling that can create strong bonds.
The ability to communicate is worth a lot. It’s worth starting to say hello to cashiers in stores, housemates and just people you know. This relaxes a person, allows him to learn dialogue skills, and also increases self-esteem. An irreplaceable ability when dating.
Film "Miss Congeniality"
Find out in 60 seconds: questions to find common points
To get to know a girl in conversation and form a general opinion about her, you need to ask questions during communication:
- What made her the most nervous in her life?
- Does she have any bad habits and what are they?
- What is better: to be rich or loved?
- What song is she willing to listen to several times?
- What was the happiest period in your life?
- What is her attitude towards the LGBT community?
- What are your plans for the next 5 years?
- What book has she read lately?
- What kind of person would your interlocutor want to live next to for the rest of her life?
- What would you never want to repeat in life?
- What advice would you give to your past self?
- Where would you like to travel?
This list can be continued endlessly. The point is to understand the girl's character in a short time.
Today, many girls see a man as a sponsor who will support and fulfill all their whims. You need to recognize such a lady and not waste time and energy.
READ Topics for conversation with a girl: list of questions for communication
It is worth preparing a universal list of questions and presenting them in conversation as a game. You should not take this too seriously and arrange an interrogation - this will scare the girl away. You should also not choose controversial or impolite questions. It must be taken into account that it is impossible to create a complete portrait of a person; you can only see the overall picture. A girl is always a secret, if you want to reveal it, you need to act gradually.
